Lost in the Past

Chapter 5

A/N - I'm really sorry the updates aren't coming as fast as I was planning on doing them, but I'm just trying to figure out how I want to get to the really good parts of the story. I really do hope you guys are enjoying the story, and I hope you all continue to read because I will be trying to update more. I hope you all enjoy this chapter so REVIEW!!

We last left off where Nathan and Peyton were talking. Lucas and Peyton had just taken Nathan home from the park after Haley left.

Nathan was officially having the worst couple of weeks of his life. Haley had called 3 times already, but hearing her voice just made him want to be with her even more. It was killing him to be sitting home without her when she said she was miserable too. He just didn't understand the concept of why she had to go and he had to stay. He tried to get Luke and Peyton to let him go to Europe, but even Haley said he couldn't. She told him it was a very private college and if he came they wouldn't let him in. It even had guards outside the doors was what he was told. "I have to go through four years of this," Nathan said aloud to no one. He'd started this habit of talking to himself and it was a little bit strange. It helped him keep his mind off of cutting himself. Luke and Peyton occupied him most of the time too. They called a counselor the day after Haley left and they brought him in to get help. Nathan didn't want to be there, but Lucas said this was going to help. So he went twice a week to get help which he didn't think was working by the way. Peyton and Lucas also went to counseling on the days Nathan didn't. They went to learn how to help Nathan stop. Lucas even had some help with dealing with his emotions. It seemed to little Nathan that the whole family was crazy.

The stress from the situation was making getting along a lot harder too. Lucas and Nathan were reverting back to their old ways and it wasn't helping Peyton any to hear them fight all day. Little Nathan wanted his Aunt Haley back. He also wanted his daddy to be around more which was getting harder and harder for Lucas. He wasn't around as much because of basketball, his job, and he was trying to do good in the college he'd chosen. The days Luke was home he either slept or he was miserable and took it out on everyone. Everyone seemed to be mad at Lucas for the way he was acting, and this was making him spend more and more time away from them. Nathan was going to his meetings to get help and in a way it was helping. It just wasn't going to go away though, so Peyton was giving him all the support she could.

Jenny was doing good so far, but Jake still hadn't been able to find any girl who could accept him and Jenny as a package. Most girls didn't want a baby even though they all thought she was adorable. "I thought babies were supposed to be chick magnets or something?" Jake said while he was walking down the street. He just so happened to almost walk into Brooke whose face was messed up from crying. She was smiling at him though and this seemed a bit odd. "Hey," he said to Brooke who was smiling playing with Jenny. "I think they are a chick magnet," she said straightening up to stand. He smiled at her and she smiled back a little flirty but not too much. "Are you ok?" Jake questioned reluctantly. "Oh, you know the whole Tim thing was just getting worse by the minute. It was bound to fall apart at one point but I just didn't expect it to be so soon," she said starting to tear again. "B-Brooke...I'm sorry...I didn't know," Jake said trying to help. "No, don't be silly. You didn't know," she replied trying to wave it off. "Well, wanna take a walk? Maybe just take your mind off things," Jake asked trying to help some more. She nodded and off they went.

Haley was doing good when it came to grades, but with her life it seemed horrible. Her parents never really called. All they cared was if she was getting grades to go on and be something. Nathan called long distance at least once a week, if not more. She just wanted to ditch the college thing and go back to Tree Hill with her old life. But no...she was Haley James...the pride and joy of her parents...well more like her grades were the pride and joy of her parents. Her life just sucked until a little surprise came up. She now needed someone to tell and it could not be Luke or Nathan.

Nathan's typical counseling sessions were pretty boring. They started with the lady just sitting in her little comfortable chair while Nathan sat on the most uncomfortable couch money could buy. It mostly started by the lady asking "How are you doing today?" Normally it was a 'fine' or 'good'. Then she would try to pry into his life and find out how he was feeling. There were only a few rare days that he actually told this lady what was going on inside his head. Counseling did kind of help but not as much as it was supposed to. The only person he really felt he could talk to was Peyton. He no longer had any romantic feelings toward her, but she always listened. He could always open up to her and she was always there to support him. She probably made a better counselor than the lady did. He had good days and bad, it was the bad that he came to Peyton. "Hey," he said one day while she was sitting on the couch. Little Nathan was out for the day with his grandpa, Peyton's dad. "Hey," she was kinda preoccupied with laundry at the moment. "Do you have a minute," he asked trying to start a conversation. "Only like a few," she replied. "I need to talk to someone because the counselor said when I start to feel like the only way I can feel ok is to cut that I need to talk," he told her trying to open up a little. "Right now though I don't want this to be about me," he said trying to catch her interest. "Well, there's only two of us here, Nathan," she said. "I want to know how you are," he said trying to get her to open up as well. "Fine," she lied trying to cover up the fact that she was falling apart. "No, you're not. Why do you lie like that?" he said noticing. "I'm fine Nathan and even if I wasn't I wouldn't tell you any different." "Please. Even the counselor said it's not good to keep all that in. I know just as well as you that you don't normally go to talk to people. Let me in," he begged. "I can't," she whispered walking upstairs. He walked up following her and found her sitting on the bed with tears threatening to fall. "What happened?" Nathan asked sitting next to her. "Lucas is never around anymore. I don't think he wants this life anymore. I don't think he wants to be married or have a son. He doesn't act like he used to and he just brushes me off. He doesn't do anything with Nathan anymore and he never wants to be here. When he is he just sleeps and most nights he's on the couch and it's by choice. Then to top it off Haley's gone and Brooke is trying to deal with the whole Tim thing. Then just to add the freaking cherry to the top of my situation, I'm freaking pregnant!" she yelled while Nathan tried to over come the shock.

Nathan stood up and tried to figure out how in the hell he was going to help her. "Wow I didn't think it was all of that," he said kneeling near her scrunched up figure. She was crying now and it made Nathan weak to see girls cry. He hated the sight of their red faces and knowing there was nothing he could do to help. She was so lost in her own world that she forgot what to do outside of it and that's why she didn't leave. She should leave him though, if he wasn't gonna care for her or pay attention. She just waited so long for a relationship with him and was too tied up in his life to just leave. It seemed best to do just that even though it's not exactly what she wanted. Now that she was having another one of his kids it was getting even harder to leave. Then there was the fact that she wouldn't really have money and there was no place to live. There was something telling her she had no chance of surviving if she left.

Meanwhile Jake was getting to know Brooke a little better by comforting her. "So, what happened?" he asked trying to figure a few things out. "Well, I knew it was too good to be true that we would be going out this long. Then I walked in and guess who I saw him with? Just guess..." He had no clue so she just continued on her rant. "Well, he was with that thing Theresa. I walk in to see my "boyfriend" and he just is laying on the couch half naked making out with her. I didn't know where to go because I know Peyton's got a life to live and tutor-girl is gone. So I just walked out and that was it," Brooke said sadly. Jake leaned over and gave her a brief hug and said, "It'll be ok and hopefully one day a guy will be true to you. I know I would," he told her smiling. She smiled back and leaned towards him again. She was close to his ear and she whispered, "So I finally found a guy who would love me as much as I love him? Didn't know there was such a thing," she said pulling away. Jake didn't like the pulling away so he leaned back towards her and put his lips right on top of hers. He pulled back a few seconds later smiling. "Yea, they still exist." She wrapped her arms back around his neck and laid back onto the couch pulling him on top. 'Not bad for just trying to comfort' Jake thinks.



Peyton wasn't too sure if Nathan really understood what she was feeling so the next best thing would be to call Haley. She was the only person she really had left. Nathan was too mixed up in his own problems to really be able to help. The phone rang twice until she heard the perky brunette she'd known through most of high school on the other end. "Hello!" Haley said hoping it was someone good. "Haley, hey long time no talk," Peyton said laughing a little. "Peyton, oh my god. I haven't talked to you in so long and I'm so glad it's you," Haley said letting the happiness in her voice go. "Hey, you don't sound so happy anymore. Do I really make it that obvious that it makes everyone else sad?" Peyton asked. "Why, what's wrong?" Haley asked curiously. "Oh just crap concerning my falling apart marriage and the man who I happen to call my husband who is now turning into what you would call a jackass," Peyton said rather quickly. "God, I'm just missing out on everything and you know I wish I was there to help you out but I'm here in damn England," Haley said sadly showing her sympathy. "Yea, I know and I wish you were here but hey that doesn't change anything. How's things at Nazi college?" She got a laugh out of Haley before an answer. "Well, I miss it in Tree Hill like crazy. I miss Nathan so much and I have like nothing to do but study here. Pretty boring if you ask me," she told, "but what's with you and Lucas?" she asked with curiosity over coming her. "Well I mean he's just never here and..." she ended up telling Haley everything she told Nathan and detailing a few more things, purposely forgetting to mention the pregnancy. "Man, Peyton, I wish I was there to slap some sense into him. I never thought that after all you went through that he would do that," Haley said shocked. "I know, " Peyton said rather quietly.

It had been about an hour of Peyton and Haley just talking and catching up on things. They began to start up this kind of game where they'd been coming up with things like "what are the odds..." and then something unbelievable that's happened in the past few years. Kind of a stupid game but then again neither was willing to get off the phone. So here they were babbling like a couple of 14 year olds on the phone. "Well, what are the odds that you'd be in England right now missing my ex-boyfriend?" Peyton said happily. "Okay then what are the odds that you and Luke would be married and have a kid and you still are having problems being happy," Haley said a little quietly. Peyton still laughed though and has a new one. "Well then what are the odds that Luke and I would be having problems and I'd end up pregnant again at the worst time in my life," she says somberly. Haley's very taken aback by this discovery and they end up talking about everything with her and Luke all over again. Someone says they want to use the phone in the background in England. "Hey, Peyton I've got to go but I'll call you. Everything will work out and if there are any new discoveries I want to know," Haley said. "Yea, I'll be in touch." "Oh wait can I try one more of the 'What are the odds?'" Haley asks. "Yea, shoot," Peyton replies. "What are the odds that I'm stuck in England talking to you and telling you I'm pregnant too but not allowed to come home and begging you not to tell Nathan right now just as you begged me almost four years ago?"

SORRY TO LEAVE IT BUT I JUST HAD TO. I FEEL HORRIBLE FOR NOT UPDATING BUT I'VE GOT THE IDEAS NOW. I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THE NEXT CHAPTER IS GONNA BE AND I'M EXCITED.

HOPE YOU ALL CONTINUE READING!!

SPOILERS

- Peyton is stuck between the Nathan and Haley situation.

- Luke and Peyton have a "discussion" (not exactly, more of an argument)

- Jake and Brooke discuss what to do next

- Haley meets someone who will change her life (not in a good way)

- Nathan's gonna talk to Lucas about life and Peyton (won't be pretty)