Chapter 8: The Depths of Rage and Back

It was dark where he sat now in the temple reflecting on the various things that had gone wrong on the mission. Had he been paying attention they never would have gotten to her. As it was it seemed to be his entire fault that Jan...oh how it hurt to think her name...was gone. That one piece of him that had just been there was forever ripped away. His light in the endless universe stripped away.

The door to his chamber cracked allowing the barest sliver of the glow panels to illuminate his room. He cringed away from it.

"Master Katarn, it's time for dinner." A tentative trainees voice cut through his blessed silence. He hated it when they called him that. He wasn't truly a master, just a trainer. One still struggling with darkness so thick that it was nearly choking.

"M'not hungry." He scraped out. His vice sounding raw for no good reason.

"But..."

"You tell Master Skywalker that if he is so concerned for me, he needs to come drag me out of here." He barely saw the hand that came down on the trainee's shoulder.

There was a hushed whisper that he couldn't quite make out and the trainee left. His door finished opening. The light glared into his eyes. A familiar voice came from the obscured silhouette. "You know he won't. I won't make you go to dinner either. But one way or another you are coming out of this disgusting cave you have made yourself, and I would much rather eat than spar at this moment."

The undisguised hostility in the voice made him cringe slightly. "Go away Avingale. I don't need you here."

"But you do. Now do you want to eat or fight? Just remember how crabby I get though without a full belly."

His eyes narrowed. "That was then..."

"Oh some things never change though." She pulled him from the bed. "We need to hash this out now then." She yanked him out the door and down the hall to the spectator's arena. "They can come watch if they want. Just remember, it's old rules all three rounds this time. I win you stop skulking and get fed and cleaned up. You win and I'm out of your life...for good."

It was the first time he stopped to think what he must look like at his point. His robe was filthy. His hair and beard were stringy, oily, and so tangled that it would take quite some time for him to get them neat again. His eyes narrowed. "Deal."

"Hand to hand, staff, and sabers at full power. In that order."

"Agreed."

The first to rounds went fairly quickly. Kyle being thoroughly trounced by Avingale. Who was really using the first two to cool her irritation at the man before her. He may not have realized it yet, but she knew that deep down he blamed her for Jan's loss, and on some level Dia's still as well. That was way she had challenged him.

Their pace hadn't changed at all from the beginning. She did take a brief moment to note all of the people that had collected. The Masters Solusar were foremost, the other various teachers. She was even able to briefly note the Solo children somewhere near the front of the elder students, watching intently.

She was the first to interrupt the near silence when he barely missed her. "Please I know that you can do better than that."

"Just attempting to regain your full attention Avi." He returned as he sliced her sleeve off.

That just solicited a smile from her. "You think I am distracted. HA." She returned and proceeded to finish the last cut needed to make his filth-ridden robe to flutter to the ground. "See you didn't even realize I had you set up for that T." She dropped to the familiar that Dia used to call him.

His eyes narrowed. "Don't start with that." He growled and lunged.

She blocked it easily. "It's where all this began. There's no place better than that, Master." She stressed the last and broke blade contact. She ducked low and took a shot at his knees.

He jumped and easily cleared her smaller frame. He came down in a double-handed swing. She barely blocked it and he had her blade pressed so close she could hear hairs on her head sizzling as they began to singe. She was going to have a difficult time disengaging from the lock. One wrong slip and her head would be split in two. Not the way she wanted it, if she was going out this time she'd at least have his forgiveness.

Using just enough telekinesis to help keep the blade off her, she ducked and rolled to the side. She sprung back to her feet. Her blade snapped back on just in time to catch his on the edge.

"Some things are just meant to remain buried." He ground out between clenched teeth. Then he stepped into his next swing, closing the distance between them. "That is one of them."

"Not to me." She grunted out as she used the leverage to spring back several meters. There was a collective gasp from the crowd. He was on her before she landed. "That's what this has been about from the beginning." She continued. This time instead of waiting he tripped her. Then placed his blade to her throat. She breathed out as he did so. "You were never able to forgive me."

Just as his saber was about to sever her head, it deactivated. The homicidal light in his eyes shut off. Then his hand came down to help her up. Once on her feet he gave her a fierce hug. "Never, never once in all this time did I ever blame you." He held her back far enough to look into her eyes. "I was the one that failed each time. I couldn't get her to stay then, just as now. I didn't heed your warning. It all falls on my shoulders. I failed both of you."

Her left hand dropped the blade that had been forgotten in the moment. It automatically shut down. "I never blamed you, either. My decisions were my own. I just happened to be the one the Tribunal decided to make an example of."

"It was still a failure in my instruction."

She pushed away from him. "I was old enough to take responsibility for my own actions. That mission was botched and you were lost because of ME." She nearly yelled at him.

By this time many of the spectators had left because the physical fight had ended. Only the masters and a handful of the gossipers remained behind to see it to its true end. They had already sensed that much of the anger and resentment had dissipated. Now it was more of a fine-tuning the details. It went back and forth like that for several minutes before they finally hugged each other again. Then they stepped back and bowed to one another and again to those who were still in the formal training arena. Then they left.

Tionne turned to Kam. "The stories that I could probably get from them..."

"I wouldn't push that one honey. If they want to share, they will."

She just gave him the 'I know' look. Then she took his hand and walked out of the viewing booth.