Chapter Thirteen

I bounced Jenny on my knee, my arms awkwardly around her. Apparently she wasn't a very adaptable baby. Even I could see she was exhausted-she was rubbing her eyes, and her arm flailing was only halfhearted.

"I want my mooommy!" she wailed.

"Me too," I whispered.

Peyton was sick. Was Peyton dying? Was her baby already dead? This had been such a happy day. I loved weddings. I was back in Tree Hill, I'd even gotten over almost all of the shock.

I still had trouble comprehending why Peyton hadn't told me. I was her best friend, I deserved to know if she was pregnant. Or was I her best friend? Had Haley taken over? They were so similar. But I'd known Peyton since the first grade, back when Haley was still just a River Kid, invisible to us Hill Kids.

I'd been worried, going away to Vassar with Mouth. She was a happy and in love, content for one of the first times. But our lives were so different. If she'd continued to date Jake, attend school, we'd still be the same and Haley would still be slightly away from us. But know they were both married with babies on the way. I recalled the picture of Haley buying maternity clothes with Peyton in 'US Weekly'. They'd been laughing, though obviously speaking about important stuff, they kind of stuff Peyton only used to tell me.

As I zoned out, I realized Jenny had fallen asleep, while I'd started to cry.

How could I ever live without Peyton?

"Brooke?" came a sleep deprived voice. Mouth's hand landed on my shoulder, and I placed mine atop his.

"Hey," I whispered. He took the baby from me and put her on the bed.

"What's wrong?" he asked gently, crouching on the floor beside me.

"She's grown away from me," I said.

"No she hasn't. You guys have changed, doesn't mean you aren't still best friends," he said.

"Haley's her best friend."

"No she isn't. They're good friends, they have a lot in common but she's still your best friend," he said comfortingly.

"And she might be dying, and I can't do anything about it!" I burst out.

"She'll probably be okay. It's been hours, and if she was going to die I think we'd have heard about it by now," he said.

"How could Jake have the heart to do that?" I asked.

"Haley and Luke are there too. They'd have called if they knew anything," he said.

"I should be there too," I said.

"You should be here. Jake trusted you with Jenny, and she's the most important thing in the world to him. This is what Peyton would have wanted."

"You're talking as though she's already dead!" I called out in anguish.

"She's not. She and her baby will be fine, and everything will go back to normal," he said soothingly.

"I don't want normal! I want things to be the way they were!"

"That can't happen Brooke, you know that," he said.

"I love you. You're the only person I've ever loved," I said sincerely.

"That's not true," he countered.

"What?

"You were in love with Lucas, that's why it hurt so badly. However, you're the first person I've ever loved," he said. I smiled at him. Had I really been in love with Lucas? What was it about him that made him so irresistible, even years later? An image of him in his tux flashed guiltily into my mind. When I'd met Mouth, he'd been short and skinny. Now he was tall and skinny-gangly. This didn't make me love him any less, but glimpses of Lucas occasionally made me sad. I'd once thought that he was the best guy I'd ever dated. He'd turned out to be just the same.

"Maybe I was. I mean when I was with him, I felt more for him than I'd ever felt for anyone. And then he wanted me back-but only after he'd all but admitted he hadn't really liked me in the first place. What kind of person does that?" I asked. I saw him struggle-Lucas was one of his best friends.

"I don't get Luke with girls. He gets great, beautiful girls that loves him and he always ends up doing something jerky," he said.

"You're sweet," I said, leaning in to kiss him. His hand went to my hair and I suddenly recalled how gross it must be-I was still in what I'd been wearing at the wedding, but I knew my makeup would have been ruined because of the crying and that my hair had been up too long. How hard it must have been for Karen, to have the happiest day of her life ruined so completely. On Peyton's wedding day, Haley and Nathan had reunited. But realizing she still had feelings for Lucas, and to have those feelings stop her from doing it with Jake on their wedding night cancelled the first one out.

My cell phone began to play 'One, Two Step', by Ciara. I pulled away from him and reached for my purse, quickly withdrawing the phone. J Jagielski flashed on the screen with his own cell number underneath. I glanced at Mouth.

"Answer it," he urged.

"I can't," I whispered.

Author's note: Obviously I have no claim to Brooke's ring tone. Remember, this only has ABOUT five more chapters.