Random Tales of the Magic Roundabout
By Todd Fan
Disclaimer: "Oh, the flesh will be tearing at the opera house tonight"
Chapter 4 - OperaMOOtics
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It was another delightfull day in the Enchanted Land, the sun was shining, as always, and everyone was at peace. Basil, Coral and Florence were riding on the Roundabout, Dylan was sleeping where someone had thoughtfully propped him up against a tree, Brian was preforming minor D.I.Y tasks in his shell, and Dougal was counting his sugar cubes.
"Soon, I'll have enough for a sugar fortress", he said gleefully, "lets see them laugh at me then!"
"Delightfull news, Darlings!", said Ermintrude happily as she trotted up, carrying a poster on her back..
"Excuse me!", sniffed Dougal, "I was talking before you. You can't just come barging into a conversation, you know!"
"But this is important!", protested Ermintrude, "more important than any of your stupid sugar-talk, THAT much is certain!"
"Shut up, Cow", said Dougal, "sugar is important, and I'LL be doing the talking, so shut your pie-hole!"
"Dougal!", snapped Ermintrude.
"MacDonalds", sang Dougal loudly, "B-urg-er- Kiiing. Steak house! Yummy yum"
Ermintrude narrowed her eyes, before clonking Dougal on the head with one of her hooves.
"You win this time", muttered Dougal darkly, backing away before she could hit him again.
Ermintrude smiled sweetly at the dog, before turning to everyone else.
"Wonderfull news", she said, tossing her poster into the crowd, "guess who JUST got invited to preform in the DalViche'areo opera concert?"
"...Is that a trick question?", asked Dougal.
Ermintrude gave him a glare, before smiling.
"ME!", she said, "they have asked ME to be one of their acts, isn't this marvelous!"
"Marvelous", grinned Brian happily, while the others blinked numbly.
"...They HAVE heard you sing, right?", asked Mr Rusty, arching a brow.
"They don't NEED to", said Ermintrude, "tallented people like that don't ned proof of vocal tallent. They can just tell"
She bounced happily.
"Can you believe it!", squeaked Ermintrude happily, "this means I will get to compete against those of a musical background as much as I. I shall get to mingle with people of my own class for once, instead of my inferiors"
"...That was like a great big hug, Ermintrude", said Brian dryly.
"It says here", said Basil, reading the paper, "that you need your own orchestra"
"Orchestra!", snorted Dougal, "the only orchestra you've got Ermintrude is Dylan!"
Ermintrude blinked, taking this in.
"Well, I will just have to make do!", she said, "the competition is for my lovely voice, not for my musical accompaniment"
Dylan's ear cocked slightly from where he'd been dozing.
"Whazat?"
Dougal grinned.
"Oh, let me tell him, PLEASE?", he said, walking over to the rabbit, "guess what, Ermintrude gets to go sing in an opera concert!"
"Good for her", murmered Dylan sleepily, "like, rock on, Ermie"
"And you have to play your guitar for her while she sings", said Dougal, glancing at the poster, "for a whole week...won't that be fun?"
THAT woke Dylan up.
"Aww, no, Dooug, man, you're kidding me!", he squeaked, "that's, like, curelty to rabbits! Someone should call the RSPCA!"
"I am standing RIGHT here", snapped Ermintrude, "and I can hear every word"
"Perhaps things will work out well", said Zebedee, appearing from nowhere, "remember, a friend in need is a friend indee..."
Dylan grabbed the front of Zebedee's shirt desperately.
"You're not listening to me, man!", he said, his ears dropped back on his head, "I can't deal with a WEEK of Ermintrude and her singing. I am but ONE rabbit!"
"Dylan", chuckled Florence, "take a breath, everything will be fine"
"Easy for you to say", Dylan retorted, "you don't have to go"
"My singing is not that bad!", cried Ermintrude, "oh, not even my BAND appreciates me!"
"I appreciate you, Ermintrude", said Brain with a smile.
"That's all well and good", said Ermintrude, "but you can't play any instruments, can you? YOU HAVEN'T GOT ANY HANDS!"
Brian considered this.
"I can play the triangle with my teeth if someone holds it up for me"
"Oh, FORGET it!", huffed Ermintrude, "Dylan, you are coming if you like it or not. That's all there is to it!"
Dylan opened Dougal's mouth, putting his head in it.
"Like, do me a favour", he said, "and just eat me now"
"I'm not going to eat you!", snorted Dougal, backing away, "I know the places you go"
"A dog that doesn't want to kill a rabbit is an odd dog indeed", said Coral.
"I'm not odd!", snapped Dougal, "I'm just kind hearted"
"You are a Maltese Terrier!", pointed out Basil, "terriers were BRED to kill rabbits!"
"If I didn't know better", pointed out Dylan, "I'd swear you kids wanted to do me in"
"Can we stop talking about Dougal's inability to do anything remotely dog-like and focus on ME?", said Ermintrude, "I have no music to accompany my singing if Dylan doesn't come along!"
"Oh, for the pitty's sake!", snapped Zebedee, "Dylan, just play at Ermintrudes concert"
"But...", started Dylan.
"Time for bed!", said Zebedee, firmly.
"But..."
"I SAID, TIME FOR BED!"
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Oh the randomness of it all! I always wnated Zeb to lose it when it came to his catchphrase. Zebedee's word is LAW, people.
