Chapter Ten

By the time morning arrived, it seemed as if most people had forgotten all about the incident with the punch bowl. It wasn't as if Michaela was going to go around talking about it, and she was grateful that most people were focusing on Abagail Bray and Martin Johnson's upcoming wedding.

Most of the housewives in town were flocking about the young woman, preparing her for her wedding. On her seventeenth birthday, she would be receiving the gift of a husband and a new life. Michaela was happy for Abagail, and she had made sure to let her know that she was fine about what happened to her dress, though Abagail insisted on finding a way to pay her back. Michaela saw no need for it and figured she wouldn't need the dress anytime soon.

Since school was out until the beginning of October due to the town council's difficulties in trying to figure out a suitable school year schedule, the Cooper children were all looking for something to occupy themselves and their time with.

Business was slow for Michaela, so she was keeping Sully's three children entertained at the clinic. Sully was over at the livery getting his tomahawk fixed by Robert E. The blade had broken, and Michaela couldn't imagine how that could have happened.

"Are you and Pa gonna get married now?" Matthew asked as Michaela sat at her desk with Brian in her lap.

"What!" Michaela asked quickly, her eyes growing wide. Colleen grinned.

"We heard everybody caught you and Pa kissin'!"

"Who told you both that?"

"Mr. Bray," Matthew replied with a laugh. "He wasn't gonna tell us, but we got it out of 'im." Michaela shook his head.

"Well, don't believe everything you hear," Michaela noted with a fresh red tinge to her cheeks. Matthew and Colleen glanced at one another.

"But Pa said it was true!" Colleen insisted. Michaela felt herself growing even redder. "We asked 'im, and he said that it was true, but we don't gotta make a big fuss about it right now."

"Your father is right," Michaela said with a smile. "Please don't make a big fuss over it, because we're not going to make a big fuss either."

"Why not?" Matthew asked. Michaela didn't know what to say. How was she supposed to explain something like this to an eight-year-old and a five-year-old? Michaela decided there really was no way to talk about it.

"Let me just say that it's something you'll understand when you're grown ups." Matthew rolled his eyes.

"Pa always tells us that when it's somethin' he doesn't wanna talk about." Michaela grinned. Just as Michaela ran out of words to say to try to explain the delicate situation to the children, the door opened. Sully walked through, and Michaela's eyes immediately brightened.

"Pa!" Matthew exclaimed. "We were just askin' if you and Dr. Mike were gonna get married." Michaela's face flushed again, and she tried not to look at Sully as the boy said those words. She focused on Brian, and Sully knew she was getting uncomfortable.

"Brian, I told ya that ya don't gotta be worryin' 'bout this." Matthew sighed and nodded. "RJ and Thomas are waitin' outside. They wanna go play a game in the meadow. Why don't ya take your sister?" RJ was the short nickname for Robert E. and Grace's oldest son, Robert Jr. Matthew took Colleen's hand.

"C'mon Colleen. They wanna be alone."

"Oooh," both children said in unison, teasing their father and Dr. Mike. They giggled as they ran out of the clinic. Sully sensed Michaela's uneasiness as he shut the door after them. Brian yawned and rested his head on Michaela's shoulder.

"Sorry 'bout them," he said with a sheepish smile. Michaela smiled and stood with Brian in her arms.

"Would you like for me to put him down for a nap?"

"Nah, I'll take 'im up. Thanks for watchin' 'em today."

"I don't mind."

"I know you're real busy with everything, but Cloud Dancin' needs me to help him out at the reservation today."

"I understand. Besides, do you see a line of patients waiting outside of the door?" He knew what she was getting at.

"Give 'em time, Dr. Mike. Ya already got lots of patients."

"And a good ninety nine percent of them are women and small children." She shook her head. "At least Robert E. is different."

"Well, ya know, if I ever need stitchin' up, I'll come to ya."

"I appreciate that," Michaela said with a smile. "Though, I hope you aren't put in the position where you might need stitches." Sully chuckled.

"I'll be right back." He took Brian upstairs for a nap. Michaela exhaled slowly as she waited for Sully to return. She hadn't been alone with him since they were at the clinic after the incident with the punch bowl. She didn't know what to think or to say. She was confused about everything, including where she and Sully were with their relationship. What exactly were they to each other? Were they courting? Were they just two friends with more than friendly feelings for one another?

Needing a distraction from her thoughts, Michaela moved to stand by the window, and her fingers lightly touched the vase that Sully had put so much time and effort into restoring. The flowers that he'd given to her the night he presented the vase to her had long since dried and wilted away, and the vase stood empty with stagnant water inside.

She opened up the window and tossed the water into the dirt street, and as she held the empty vase in her hands, she thought of the smile on Sully's face after he'd given it back to her. He'd been so happy that he had made her happy. She wanted to see him smile like that more often!

His footsteps fell heavily on the stairs as he began to come back from putting Brian down for a nap. Michaela turned from the window and placed the vase back down on her desk. When Sully reappeared, he noticed that Michaela was uncomfortable.

"Is everything alright?" he wondered, closing the door that separated the room from the staircase so they wouldn't disturb Brian upstairs.

"Yes," the doctor replied breathlessly.

"Come sit. Ya look like you're gonna pass out." Sully moved to take her hand, and she pulled away as if she'd been shot. "What's wrong?" Michaela felt absolutely embarrassed. Sully was so caring and attentive. She just wasn't used to the kind of treatment she was being given. She didn't want to feel uncomfortable, but just knowing that they needed to talk about where their relationship was headed made her feel weak in the knees. "Did I do somethin' wrong?"

"No," she said softly, finally letting him take her hand. He led her over to her chair and waited for her to sit. He finally half leaned and half sat on the edge of the desk. "You didn't say anything wrong. You didn't do anything wrong."

"Well, why did ya jump back like ya were scared?"

"I'm not scared!" Michaela defended. She swallowed hard, and Sully knew she was lying.

"Ya don't gotta lie to me, Dr. Mike. You can trust me, ya know?"

"I know." She took a long pause before continuing. "The truth is that I am a bit frightened."

"Of what? Of me?"

"Don't be silly. Of course I'm not frightened of you."

"Then what's the matter? I ain't gonna be able to help if ya don't talk to me." She knew he was right, and when she went to stand again, he followed her to the window. He didn't dare touch her, because he didn't want to make her any more uncomfortable than she already was. "Why are ya so uncomfortable 'round me?"

"That's just it, Sully. I'm usually not! Before yesterday . . . before what happened . . ." her voice trailed off.

"Ya mean when we kissed and told each other 'bout how we feel?" Michaela nodded.

"Yes, precisely. Sully, when we were only friends, I didn't have to worry about anything. My feelings were secret, as were yours, and we didn't have expectations."

"Expectations?" Michaela finally turned to face him.

"Don't people usually have expectations when they're . . ."

"When they're what?"

"That's what I'd love to know," Michaela replied with exasperation. "Sully, what are we to one another?"

"We're friends who wanna get to know more 'bout each other. We're two people who care about each other and wanna see what comes of it."

"That's it?" Sully knew what she was getting at. He knew she needed to hear the words for it to be true. So, he took her hands in his and kissed her knuckles softly.

"No. That ain't all of it, anyway. I'd like to think that we're courtin'."

"Courting?" Michaela asked hopefully.

"Sure. Ya know what courtin' is, right?"

"Of course I do," Michaela replied, shaking her head slightly. "It's just that . . ."

"Ya never courted with nobody before?" She shook her head again, this time letting him know that she was new to all of this. Sully smiled slightly and leaned in to press a kiss to Michaela's cheek. "Don't worry." She felt his breath against her ear, and the tingling sensation that moved from his lips to her very core made her tremble and close her eyes. "I ain't courted nobody before."

"You haven't?" she asked with surprise, opening her eyes widely to stare into his.

"Nope," he admitted.

"I have to say I'm surprised!" Sully knew what she meant.

"Just 'cause I look the way I do? 'Cause I live out here?" He wasn't offended. He was merely trying to understand her better.

"No! I mean . . ." She blushed. "I've seen the way some of the ladies in town look at you, and I have to say that if some of them weren't married . . ." Sully laughed and shook his head.

"I just ain't never been interested in nobody the way I am about you. 'Sides, when do ya think I woulda had the time to court between movin' out West and helpin' Charlotte by takin' the kids?"

"You have a point there." Then there was another question weighing on Michaela's mind. She knew it wasn't proper to ask, and it definitely wasn't the time. She was brought up and told that it was proper to wait until marriage before doing, well, several things. She wondered if Sully had been brought up the same way, or if he'd been with a woman in his years of traveling out West. But, that discussion would be held off for another time, because she knew that there was no way she would be able to ask without an uncomfortable silence filling the room every time they saw one another.

"So, what about these expectations now that we both know we're courtin'?" Sully wondered. Michaela sighed heavily.

"I'm just not sure if I know what I'm doing. This is all so new to me, and I enjoy spending time with you very much. The truth is that I want this to work!" Sully nodded.

"Me too. So, we're gonna have to help each other out a little as we go. Do ya think you're up to it?" Michaela smiled at Sully's reassurance.

"I am," she nodded.

"Good. Me too." He kissed her cheek again. "I really ought to get out to the reservation now, but if ya want me to stay so we can talk . . ."

"Oh no, I don't want to keep you."

"Ya sure? I can just send word to Cloud Dancin' . . ."

"Sully, go on. The children and I will be fine. We'll see you around five?" Sully nodded.

"Alright. I'll see ya later." Sully wanted to kiss her again, he knew he should give her some space. The truth was that she wanted him to kiss her too, but when he left without doing so, she could tell that he wanted her to adjust, and he was just being considerate. So, after Sully left, Michaela settled back down at her desk to do a little reading before the children returned.


Abagail settled down into her desk chair after a long day of having measurements taken for her wedding gown. She hadn't seen Martin much that day, because he was working in order to make enough money to start building the house they would be living in. Luckily, Widow Hanson was turning her large home into a boarding house and had offered to let the newlyweds share a room until their home was complete.

As Abagail sat at her desk, she opened up her diary and began to flip through it. She'd been writing in it for years, and she still hadn't been able to fill the pages. She didn't write in it often, but when she felt moved by something, she would write and write until her heart was content. Her writings were usually all about Sully and her dreams of their future together. Of course they were merely fantasies, but to a nearly seventeen-year-old Abagail Bray, they were everything.

A knock came to the door, and Maude walked in with a tray of food from Grace's.

"I thought ya might be hungry. You've been so busy with preparin' for the weddin'."

"Thanks Ma," Abagail said quietly. Maude came to sit on the edge of her daughter's bed after placing the tray down in front of her daughter.

"I know ya must be real nervous 'bout marryin' Martin."

"I'm not," Abagail answered quickly. "I love him; he loves me. We're gonna be happy together, mama." The funny thing about it was that when she thought of her upcoming marriage, she could only see Sully standing at the altar, waiting to take her hand in marriage.

"I'm glad to hear it, Abby. Ya know I am. But, I know how ya felt 'bout Sully."

"Oh Ma," Abagail said, shaking her head. "Sully doesn't love me. He never will. I've accepted that." Of course she hadn't, but playing the part of the non-interested, hard-to-get woman would surely make Sully's head turn.

"I'm glad ya finally got to your senses. I'm gonna go downstairs and help out your Pa. If ya need anything, come let us know."

"Thanks Ma," Abagail replied. The older woman left the room, shutting the door behind her. Abagail pushed the food tray aside and seriously considered smashing it against the wall. But, instead, she opened up her diary and began to write.

Dear Diary,

Ma and Pa are so happy, because I'm getting married. Why can't I be happy? I always thought that it would be the happiest day of my life on my wedding day. But, I never thought that my groom would be Martin Johnson. I do care for Martin. He's been nothing but sweet to me, but there's only one problem. He's not Sully! I want Sully to be the one to hold me for the rest of my life. I want to lie in his arms at night and give him the future children he wants to have. I want to be a mother to Colleen, Brian, and Matthew. I know I'm young, but lots of girls my age are getting married, because they're not going on to college. I'd love to go to college someday, but for now, I want to stay here and keep an eye on my love. I swear if Dr. Mike hurts him, she'll regret it! I like her, but if she hurts the man I love, I will not let her get away with it. The only thing I have to do is convince Martin that I love him and only him. I can't have him suspicious of me, now can I?

She took a deep breath and slammed her book shut. Writing didn't help this time. She needed to see Sully. He was at the reservation, or so she had heard. Perhaps a long talk with him would help to soothe her heart and ease her worries.

She ate a bit of food so her mother wouldn't worry, and after a few minutes, she pulled on her bonnet and started out toward the reservation on Buttercup's back.


Sully was making his way back from the reservation with Wolf at his heels. He hoped to arrive back in town before dinnertime, because he wanted to invite the lady doctor over to eat with him and the children. He loved spending time with her, and he just couldn't get enough of her! She was the most beautiful woman he'd ever set eyes on, and his heart already knew he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Sometimes, he just felt like falling to his knees and promising himself to her for the rest of eternity, but he knew it was far too soon, and with her so nervous and overwhelmed with the turn of events in their relationship, he didn't want to move anything too quickly. Just knowing that they cared for one another was enough to keep Sully satisfied. He knew the time would come when he'd propose, and he already knew what kind of house he was going to build. He could already see himself carrying her over the threshold after the honeymoon, tucking the children into bed after dinner, and taking her to bed to make love to her and prove his heart to her for the rest of the night.

He actually missed her at the moment. It was as if she were an addiction. He needed her, and it seemed that the time he got to spend with her was never enough. He needed more and more of her, but he never felt full except for when he was holding her or kissing her.

Wolf's ears perked up, and Sully looked down at his loyal pet.

"What is it, boy?" The sound of a horse approaching turned Sully's attention. He saw Abagail coming near on Buttercup's back. When she stopped the horse, he automatically thought something was wrong.

"Abagail? Is there somethin' wrong?"

"No," she replied slowly. "Why would there be?"

"I don't know," Sully said as they started to walk along. Abagail led her trusty horse behind her, while Wolf frolicked ahead. "Just thought maybe somethin' happened to the kids or to Dr. Mike."

"They're all fine," Abagail replied quickly. "Don't worry."

"What brings ya out here?"

"I was lookin' for you, actually."

"Me? What for?" They walked along toward town, and Sully glanced at Abagail.

"Yeah. I just wanted to talk. We don't get to talk much like we used to."

"That's true," Sully replied. "I remember back before Charlotte died. I used to take ya fishin' all the time, and we'd talk about lots of things."

"Remember the picnic we had just before Brian was born? Remember how you told me how much you liked spending time with me?" Sully smiled and nodded.

"Yeah, I remember." Abagail wanted to jump into his arms right then, but she heard him clear his throat. "Havin' you around was good practice."

"Practice?" Abagail asked hopefully.

"I never knew what it was like to be a pa," he explained. "Havin' you nearby kinda got me prepared for what it's gonna be like when Colleen's your age." He didn't just say that, did he? Abagail couldn't believe this. Was he actually saying that he thought of her as some sort of daughter figure!

"Oh," she whispered, feeling her mouth go dry.

"Colleen really likes havin' ya around. She thinks of ya as a big sister." This was too much. Abagail shook her head. They walked on in silence, and Sully turned his head to look at her. "What did ya wanna talk about?" Abagail swallowed hard. She knew this was going to be painful, but she had to know.

"You and Dr. Mike seem to be real happy." She noticed Sully's face brighten.

"Yeah."

"That's all you're gonna say? Do ya love her?" Sully hadn't even told Michaela that he loved her yet. It was too soon, and he knew he shouldn't tell anyone else before he told her. The look on his face told Abagail the truth.

"Truth is, I never felt this way 'bout anybody before," he explained. "I never thought I'd care about someone the way I care about Dr. Mike." Abagail knew it. As she looked into his eyes, her heart told her that he would never want her or love her. Coming to that final realization made her heart break, and she had to get away.

She quickly mounted Buttercup.

"Where ya goin'?"

"I just remembered that I promised to help my ma with somethin'." She rushed off without saying goodbye so Sully wouldn't have to see her cry.


That night, Michaela stepped out of Sully's homestead after dinner. He was getting the rambunctious young ones to sleep, so she figured it would be a little while until the giggling and jumping about tapered off. They had had a very quiet meal between the two of them. The children, on the other hand, had been talkative and very hyper. Not being in school seemed to give the children less to do and more time to eat candy and run about playing silly games.

As she sat out on the porch and looked up at the big bright moon, she closed her eyes and thought of her first kiss with Sully. She began to think back to everything that had happened since she had arrived in Colorado Springs. She had met so many wonderful people, and many of the young children in town already looked up to her and enjoyed talking with her as they passed her on the street.

Then there was Abagail. She was a kind girl, but something about her was different. Michaela had never really thought about Abagail's opinion of her before, but as she looked back through everything that had transpired over the last month, she began to come to a realization.

Abagail always had picnics with Sully and the children before, and now that she was in Sully's life, those picnics had stopped. What about the conversation in which Abagail seemed disappointed that she wasn't frightened off by the prospect of Sully wanting lots of children? Then there was the incident with the horses on the way to the reservation. Last but not least, there was the incident at the party with the punchbowl. It seemed as if Abagail was trying to compete with Michaela or something. Was she trying to settle some kind of score that Michaela didn't know about?

Thinking back on it, she remembered more and more incidents when Sully was around. Abagail always seemed to get starry-eyed and giggly when Sully was around. Then there were times when she'd seem to sober up and go as pale as a sheet.

"Dr. Mike?" Sully asked loudly, startling Michaela from her thoughts. She turned to face him, and he moved to sit down next to her. "I called your name three times. What's on your mind?"

"I'm sorry," she said quietly. "I was just thinking." She smiled a little. "I didn't get to ask earlier, but, how was your day?"

"Not bad," he replied. "Somethin' strange did happen though."

"What's that?" Michaela asked curiously.

"I was walkin' back to town, and Abagail came ridin' out. She said she'd come to talk to me."

"She did?" Michaela asked, the wheels in her head turning faster and faster. Michaela decided not to press him for information, and she knew he'd tell her if he felt like he should.

"She started askin' me all these questions." He realized that he shouldn't have said that, because one of those questions had an answer that he didn't know if Michaela as ready to hear yet.

"Oh?"

"Yeah. They were just questions about the two of us, and then she said she had to go help her ma with somethin'. She took off real fast." Michaela sighed and nodded her head.

"She's cares for you."

"What?" Sully asked with a dry laugh. "That ain't possible."

"Of course it is!" Michaela laughed. "Sully, think about it. She doesn't come on picnics with you and the children anymore, and every time I'm around, she acts strange, but she smiles at you and offers to help with the children. Sully, I truly believe that Abagail has feelings for you."

"But she's just a kid," Sully said, shaking his head.

"Well, she's about seventeen, so I'd say she's a young woman."

"Yeah, but how could she be sweet on me? I mean, I think of her as a little sister or somethin'. Before the kids came along, I kinda thought of her as the daughter I didn't think I'd ever have. I always thought she looked up to me as a big brother or somethin' like that." Sully sighed and shook his head. "What on earth is she thinkin'?"

"I believe that she's thinking that you're going to fall in love with her and save her from marrying Martin Johnson. You know how she wasn't looking forward to going to college, Sully. Then, all of the sudden, she accepted a marriage proposal from a boy she'd barely been courting for three weeks!" It was all starting to make sense to Sully now.

"I can't believe this," he whispered.

"I can't say that I blame her," Michaela replied, feeling immediately foolish for saying such a thing.

"Ya can't?" She swallowed hard and closed her eyes.

"Well, you're handsome and charming. You're wonderful with your children, and you're always there to help people out when they need you." When she opened her eyes, she found Sully grinning at her. "What?"

"I was gonna say the same thing 'bout you."

"That I'm handsome and charming?" Michaela teased. Sully laughed.

"Nah, ya ain't handsome. You're beautiful. I was gonna say that you're great with the kids, and you're always there to help folks out when they need ya. Ya probably think we don't have much in common, but that ain't true. We're more alike than most folks would think." Michaela blushed and looked up at the moon as Sully's arm came to wrap around her. She leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Sully, perhaps you should speak with her."

"Ain't gonna do no good. If she don't wanna marry Martin, she ain't gonna do it. I don't think she woulda said 'yes' to his proposal if she didn't wanna marry him. She cares about him, and I think she's tryin' to figure out what she wants. When she realizes that I ain't interested in her like that, she'll know what to do."

"I hope you're right," Michaela breathed. Sully tilted Michaela's face so he could look into her eyes.

"You worry too much, ya know that?" Michaela smiled and closed her eyes as Sully's lips pressed against hers in a loving kiss.