Disclaimer: 'The West Wing' and all its characters belong to Aaron Sorkin, John Wells Productions, and Warner Bros. No copyright infringement is intended. I'm just a grad student with no money.
Spoilers: none
"Josh."
"What?"
"We have to leave."
"We've got plenty of time."
"We're going to be late."
"No, we're not."
"Have you seen the news? It's a traffic nightmare out there. We're going to be late."
"We're traveling in the presidential motorcade, Donna. Believe me when I tell you they will not be starting the game without us."
"Okay. I'm excited. Are you excited?"
"I'm excited."
"You don't sound excited."
"I'm excited."
"Really?"
"What do you want me to say, Donna? I'm excited on the inside."
"Hey, gang, we need to leave."
"CJ, Josh isn't excited about the game."
"The entire district and surrounding counties of Maryland and Virginia are excited about the game."
"Josh isn't."
"Josh, is this true?"
"What is it with you people? I'm excited, okay? I'm through-the-roof-over-the-moon-doing-cartwheels-in-my-heart excited. Baseball has returned to the capital. Woohoo."
"Woohoo?"
"Yes."
"What is 'woohoo'?"
"It's the sound you make when you're excited."
"It's the sound you make?"
"Yeah."
"You're right, Donna. He's not excited."
"Dammit, Donna."
"Okay, excited or not, we really do have to leave now."
"The President looked good throwing out the first pitch, don't you think? I mean, he got it over the plate at least. Toby'll be relieved."
"So some time during this evening, will you be sharing your thoughts as to why you're not excited about the game?"
"Are you going to get me a beer?"
"Don't change the subject, Josh. And no, I will not at any point tonight be getting you a beer."
"Why not?"
"Delicate system. And I don't think you deserve one."
"I don't deserve a beer?"
"No."
"That doesn't seem fair."
"Live with it. Now tell me why you're not excited. All week long with all the newscasts covering the away games and everyone in the office wearing their new Nationals gear, you've been sitting at your desk pouting."
"I have not been pouting."
"Moping then."
"I do not mope."
"Well, you've certainly been doing something this past week."
"I have not."
"Could your lack of enthusiasm over this momentous occasion have anything to do with the fact that the Nationals are currently in first place ahead of your beloved Mets?"
"How do you know about that?"
"I know how to read the sports page, Josh. It's not like it's written in some secret code only guys can understand. So is that reason?"
"Yeah, maybe it is."
"And maybe you're afraid you'd be disloyal to that guy with the funny facial hair who used to do those shampoo commercials and the other Met players if you were to root for this new team? Because you're not. Being disloyal, I mean."
"Are you talking about Mike Piazza?"
"I guess so. The one who swaggers up to the plate."
"He does not swagger."
"Yeah, he does. Actually, he looks kind of hot when he does that."
"Really?"
"Well, only a little bit. The facial hair gets in the way of any real potential for hotness."
"'Kay."
"Ooh, what just happened?"
"We scored two runs."
"'We'?"
"Yeah, I guess it's okay if I root for the Nationals. It's not like the Mets are going to mind. Just don't ask me to choose sides when the pennant race starts."
"Okay. Why are you looking at me like that?"
"I'm hoping maybe you'll get me that beer now."
"Shut up, Josh. I'm watching baseball."
fin
