Kendall sat in her darkened living room staring out onto the courtyard and sipping a cup of tea—thinking about her husband. Marriage to Zach Slater was nothing like she'd imagined, and their relationship was more confusing than she would have liked. Just as in Paris, he was kind and considerate, solicitous of her needs, and a constant source of comfort. He rarely missed their dinners together, inviting her to the casino if he couldn't get away, and surprising her with many thoughtful gifts. But she still felt unsure of him and their connection. While she tried to attribute it to her natural distrust of everyone, she couldn't quell her doubts—or bring herself to speak her concerns aloud.

So she sat staring out the window at the lights shining from Zach's condo—from the home once inhabited by his rapist, sociopath brother—and wondered what he did over there for hours at a time. She startled when the delicate chimes of the crystal anniversary clock, a gift for their one-month anniversary, noted the hour of three. Three in the morning and her husband was once again working instead of holding her in his arms, and she didn't know how to tell him that she missed his presence in their bed.

Zach worked harder than anyone she had ever met. He was very involved in running his casinos, bound and determined that they would succeed despite the attention required from the Cambias reorganization. Of course, Ethan had not made any of this easy, being constantly around and irritating as he contested the disposition of old Alex, Sr.'s estate. She had noticed that Zach was very uncomfortable when she and Ethan were together, and hated that he still didn't trust her around him when she had emphatically explained that the relationship was dead and buried.

When they first returned from Paris, their attitude had been the two of them against the world. Zach gladly accompanied her to the doctor for prenatal care and they talked of plans for a house with a yard and perhaps even a dog. He was an exciting and considerate lover, and she treasured the way he made her feel warm and special with just a touch or a glance. They had laughed long and hard over the dubious success of their dinner at the Valley Inn, and soon tested their unity by inviting Jackson and Erica over for a quiet meal. Although Erica was her usual acerbic self, she had not allowed her mother's barbs and veiled innuendos to rattle her. In fact, after that evening Zach had a private visit with Erica where he had laid all their cards on the table, and her mother had been on her best behavior ever since. Although Erica and Zach had a few minor tussles, he had assured her that he found dealing with her mother more entertaining than irritating.

She smiled wistfully remembering the way he had told her the story of his life after Alex Cambias' "death," without embellishment or subterfuge, and giving equal weight to both the good and the bad. He explained how he had survived as a seventeen-year-old, alone in the world and without any identity except a made-up, throwaway name. He shared with her the names he had used, although some had faded from memory as he had taken on the permanent identity of Zach Slater more than ten years before. The unfortunate and accidental death of his old school friend had made it possible for him to become a real person once again. She was very pleased to discover that he was legally Zach Slater and not using a false identity as Ethan had accused. Since he had "died" so many years before, Zach had been able to quietly change his name without drawing the attention of his father… and he had felt certain that Michael would bury the information if it had come to light. But he never knew if that happened because he truly hadn't spoken with his brother since the day they staged the accident.

In exchange, she had given him her version of the events in her life. He knew the details, and most of her actions, but had no way of knowing how she had felt when they happened, or what had driven her to the things she had done. She loved the fact that there were still mysteries of her life that she could share with him, since his investigators had been so thorough. She had reveled in the closeness they felt toward each other after sharing their pasts… and realized that it made no difference to the people they had become. She hugged herself tightly and wished that he could have remained so content with their life together.

She could pinpoint the change in Zach to a few weeks later, when a lovely flower arrangement had arrived from Maria in congratulations. The card had said nothing special, but Zach had been quiet and thoughtful the rest of the evening. That evening was the first time he had left their bed in the middle of the night to work at the other condo, leaving her to wake alone. When she had asked him why he left, he had looked away and given her an excuse about needing to take care of some international calls. Trying to be trusting and supportive, she had let the issue rest, but still did not believe it to be the reason for his absences.

She wished that they could move out of the condos and into a home of their own, but Zach found something wrong with each and every house that their realtor found for them. One had too much light, another was too dark, too many stairs, not enough yard, the list of imperfections went on and on. Kendall despaired of them being able to move before the baby was born, and didn't know what they would do in her one-bedroom condominium if that happened. They had a doctor's appointment that afternoon, and two houses to look at—but she was certain even before seeing them that Zach would find something lacking.

Suddenly feeling angry and hurt, Kendall stood and opened the door, walking out into the courtyard. It was long past time to find out just what Zach was up to over there, and to make him come back to bed. She wanted to make love with him and lie in his arms, feeling safe and secure. But feeling that way with Zach seemed to be getting more and more difficult, and if she forced the issue she might just force him out of her life. She stood for a moment, looking at the other condo before turning back to her own and closing the door. She climbed into bed and tried to sleep, knowing that Zach would be back before dawn—he always was.


Zach sat on the sofa of his condo listening to the booming of a clock over the fireplace. Three a.m. and he was sitting in that damn condo instead of lying in bed with his wife where he belonged. He groaned aloud before rising to pace the floor once again… feeling such yearning for Kendall that he could barely stop himself from rushing back to their bed and making love to her for the rest of the night—and wondered why he felt the need to stop himself.

He reflected on the optimism that he had felt when they first returned from Paris, and how they had been able to sustain it for a little while. Little by little, they were winning over the citizens of Pine Valley just by their contentment. Not long after their dinner party at the Valley Inn, he had paid a visit to Erica and made it abundantly clear that if she continued on her path toward the destruction of their marriage that she would only be hurting herself. He had no problem moving his family away from Pine Valley or even out of the country if he felt it was in their best interests. He informed her that it would be her attitude and behavior that would decide whether or not she was a part of their child's life, and she knew that Zach was capable of following through with his promises. To emphasize that fact, he gifted Kendall with an apartment in Paris near where Bianca and Miranda were living, ostensibly to make it easier when they traveled to France for business or pleasure. As she didn't want to have both of her daughters and their children living thousands of miles away, Erica pulled in her horns and she and Zach had observed an armed truce since that meeting.

Kendall had been thrilled at her mother's apparent change of heart and quite pleased at Zach's tactics, because he did not try to keep them from her. He was tired of a life filled with secrets and lies and wanted a clean slate with Kendall. He had even started to believe that they had a chance, until the day everything changed. He had returned from a long day at the casino, poring over books and ledgers with the accountants that had given him a headache, and found Kendall waiting for him with a beautiful floral arrangement on the coffee table. She silently handed him the card, and he read a message of good wishes and congratulations from Maria. The look on Kendall's face had wounded him, making him aware that she still didn't trust him. He knew immediately that she felt threatened by his love for Maria, regardless of the fact that he had told her repeatedly that he felt nothing for Maria except a fondness for their shared past. He sighed loudly as he remembered again how he had looked into her pain-filled eyes and realized that sometime during the past few months he had fallen deeply in love with his wife.

He had, he thought, said and done all of the right things to comfort her and make sure that she knew his relationship with Maria was long over. They had an intimate dinner, and he had made love to her tenderly. That night he had enjoyed watching her fall asleep in his arms before surrendering to sleep himself. He had barely dozed off when he was awoken by a sound from outside the condo, and left their bed to investigate. Finding everything quiet, he still decided to enter his old condo and make sure that all was well—his instincts on full alert for the safety of Kendall and the baby.

He found the condo to be quiet and dark, and almost left immediately. However, something drew him to the credenza by the window and he pulled out a file that contained boyhood pictures of himself and his brother, Michael. Without conscious thought or volition, he found himself sitting on the sofa and reading through the scrapbook of clippings he had made and all of the articles about Michael, and of the fallout from his murder. Zach had sat for quite a while staring at a picture of Kendall while she was on trial for Michael's murder, wearing a maternity dress.

He didn't know how long he sat there before he noticed that the ghost of his brother had joined him. He was perfectly aware that Michael wasn't really there, and suffered no delusions of being haunted. He had purchased the condo to be close to his brother, and now all he wanted was to banish him and his memory from their lives. It had such a hold over him, though; probably because he knew it was the place his brother had died. Michael, for lack of a better description, was a part of his subconscious mind. He felt rather than saw him sit down and whisper, "How can you love Kendall Hart? She's nothing but a common whore… and I should know. After all, I had her first… don't you want better than your brothers' sloppy seconds? Come on, Alex… you—the golden boy—the person I sacrificed my life for—and you're settling for that tramp?"

"NO!" Zach had shouted at Michael and at Ethan if he was to be honest. "You don't get to say a word about her. Blame me for deserting you… blame me for it all… but Kendall is not to be mentioned. You leave her out of this… I love her."

Michael had laughed cruelly and disappeared. Zach had poured himself a scotch he didn't really want, and paced the room for a while before returning to bed with his wife. She had stretched and snuggled against him, whispering that she missed him. But when she tried to make love to him, he had claimed to be too tired. Suddenly, he couldn't bear the thought of long days stretching out one after another and not being able to admit his love to Kendall… days of watching her grow more and more disenchanted in their life because he would never be good enough… not as Zach Slater and certainly not as Alex Cambias, Jr.

Zach had begun to dread the nights. He went through all the motions, aching to confess his love to her, and found that he could no longer sleep. Each night he was pulled across the courtyard, into that place where Kendall had been with his brother. He didn't know if he was jealous of Michael, but there were nights when he wanted to wake her, pull her from their bed and make love to her in each and every room—hopefully exorcising his brother from their lives once and for all. But Zach realized the insanity of such a plan, and exercised a tight control over those demons.

Ethan was another constant source of conflict. Where Michael haunted his nights, Ethan haunted his days. His youngest brother delighted in visiting him and trying to goad him into an argument—making sly comments about his time with Kendall and implying how much he missed having her in his bed. There was many an evening that he arrived home for dinner and found him at the condo irritating Kendall. Zach knew without a doubt that nothing was going on between Kendall and Ethan, one look at her told him all he needed to know. She wanted Ethan out of their lives and away from Pine Valley as much as he did, but any direct confrontation only encouraged the boy to be more antagonistic. With deep concern for Kendall's health and the well being of their child, he had chosen to try and kill his brother with kindness—but was very afraid that all he was going to do in the end was kill him.

He wondered if he was succumbing to madness, if he was just as cursed as his father and brothers. His father had been a cruel and abusive man, his brother Michael had turned into a monster, and Ethan—the brother who had been protected from the family and its curse—was devolving into something less than human. The Cambias money and the Cambias power had destroyed each of those men, while he had just volunteered to destroy the destroyer… or would it get him first? He knew that the only difference between him and the other members of his family was his ability to exert control over his baser instincts—but would that legacy of hatred and pain find a way to make him its next victim anyway?

He had always found strength in his refusal to have any part of the Cambias money and power, the victor of his personal war. But now he had a chance for real happiness, and he wondered if it had only been a skirmish after all. He had found love, and was soon to become a father… and he wondered if the curse had merely been patiently waiting for him to find something of such value that he would be destroyed by its loss. As he considered the responsibility of parenthood, he felt totally inadequate to the task. How did one become a good father? …A decent, caring man? He'd had no examples in his life… but it had never mattered before. Now nothing mattered more, and there wasn't enough time to learn.

Zach paused in his pacing, hearing a sound in the courtyard. He went to the door and looked out the window, seeing Kendall standing in the courtyard looking toward him. He doubted she could see him, but he felt immediate guilt that she had woke and found him gone. He watched her return to their home, and quickly put away his files and pictures, rinsed out his glass, and locked the door. He climbed into bed only a few minutes after Kendall, but didn't comment when she pretended to be asleep. They both lay apart, wide-awake and immersed in their thoughts for the remainder of the night.