Title: Tears
Theme: #11: Trembling Hands
Rating: PG (just because its angsy-ish. could be G, but oh well)
Word Count: 1180
Characters/Pairings: AthrunxCagalli
Author's Notes: more angsty than my last one, but with a bit of fluff too. not my best, but thats okay. sorry if it seems ramble-y. its set before the end of Gundam Seed, on the Eternal (dunno why, just picked that).
A fragile falling light now awakens us
Sorrow is heard, and then from that place disappears
Cagalli floated gently through the broad corridors of the Eternal, lost deep in her own thoughts. The drab gray of the interior of the ship hung heavily on her mood, weighing her down in the place of gravity. She sighed quietly, gripping the railing on the wall in order to turn along a hallway with a large window.
Earth shone beautifully, its vivid blue oceans contrasting sharply with the grungy green-brown mix that was land, layered over with shades of gray and white from the clouds that floated above everyone on the planet. It was so beautiful from a distance, yet there was so much hate and ugliness down there. Though space wasn't really exempt from that either.
A roaming fate, a faint smile
We touch and then embrace in this moment
She didn't notice Athrun until he was just behind her.
"Hi Cagalli," he said softly, leaning on the railing next to her, his gaze not locked on the world outside their small ship, but rather on her face. Her eyes were locked intently on the glowing planet, no sign of emotion passing over her face.
She nodded silently in acknowledgement of him, flashing only a faint smile before she returned to her internal reverie.
"Cagalli…"
To love deeply; courage and hope
I feel this memory so strongly
She sighed loudly. "What do you want Athrun?" she asked sharply, wincing slightly at her own tone. She wasn't angry with him, not really. But her anger and fear and pain leaked into her voice anyways.
"Cagalli…"
"Can you say anything but my name?" she shouted, her temper snapping and breaking free like water bursts from a dam. "If you have something to say, say it! Otherwise go away and just leave me alone!" Tears leaked past her eyelids, floating away from her face in tiny clear bubbles that sparkled as the light struck them.
"Cagalli, I—"
"You what? Have come to lecture me? Have come to rub in the fact that you can actually do something to help end this war, while I am stuck here to wait and watch like a stupid, naïve child?"
Intertwined, heart to heart, we connect and come alive
"That's not—" Athrun tried to say.
"Just leave me alone!" she snapped back, turning her head away from him as the tears kept flowing. Why was he here, of all people? She could have handled anyone else. She had become good at wearing a mask, hiding her feelings, her pain, her anger behind a still screen, hiding it from the world.
A glittering light shines, calling us awake A beginning is heard, and from that place we tear ourselves awayBut Athrun…he broke down that barrier, tore down the hardened walls she had built in her mind. The daughter of Representative Athha had never been allowed to show fear, to show anger. She had had to be a model for her people, some unmoving ideal that could be admired, perfect and strong. But inside…inside she was still a small child, afraid and alone. She'd always been alone. Yes, there had been her father. She had loved him with all her heart. Yet something had always been missing. Finding Kira had gone a ways towards filling the void in her life, but something had always been missing…
Unhealing scars, solitude, and suspense I'm leaving this shaky existence far behindAthrun watched Cagalli, concerned at her uncharacteristic behavior. She wasn't one to snap at him, not unless he had done something wrong. And she seemed so down, as though she had fallen in a dark pit of despair and wasn't even attempted to climb back out if it. He had never seen her cry like this before. Tears of anger he had seen, tears of grief he had seen. But tears that leaked out like puss from a wound? Tears that seemed to be filled with hidden pain? He longed to reach out and brush them from her cheeks, but he was afraid. He hated to admit it to himself, but that was the truth. He was afraid. Afraid that she would reject him once again, as she had done only a moment before.
And then, a trembling finger touches my back, and I am reassured once againIt was amazing how fighting could be so much easier than simply talking. Fighting didn't require you to bare your soul or anything about yourself. One just had to show an apathetic front, and that was that. But talking was face to face. And the kind of talking Athrun had in mind…that was even worse.
His hand trembling, he slowly reached out, using a finger to tilt Cagalli's face so she was looked at him. Her eyes gazed beyond him as she did her best to ignore him. The tears had slowed, but she was shaking ever so slightly at the effort to hold them in.
A deep despair attacks, the night has sunk into darknessBut if my prayers are heard, I'll believe everlastingly
"Cagalli, look at me," he commanded gently, but firmly. A bit startled, her gaze flicked to meet his, her amber eyes locking onto his own emerald ones. A bit softer, he continued. "What is bothering you? I haven't seen you like this before, and I'm worried…"
With a certain pride in our hearts, we're being shown the way And with wings spread we'll fly away, to the strongly painted skiesCagalli hesitated for a moment. He was the reason for all of this. Before he had come, everything was stable. She knew who she was, where she was going. But Athrun made her feel weak inside. He made her feel as though she was no longer completely independent, unable to stand on her own through whatever may come. But…it made her wonder. Was it such a good thing to be so alone? Maybe having someone that she was forced to lean on could be a good thing?
Drawing a shuddering breath, she launched herself at Athrun, losing what little control she had left as she sobbed. "Oh Athrun, I'm sorry! It's just…" She trailed off as she cried into his shirt, tiny tear bubbles drifting off as they escaped her eyes.
A glittering light shines, calling us awakeAn echoing is heard, and from this place we tear ourselves away
Athrun blinked, startled, freezing for a moment as Cagalli clung to him. At last, he wrapped his arms around her, a small smile stealing across his face as he held her until she cried the last of her tears.
Cagalli gently pulled herself from Athrun's embrace at last, wiping her face as she went. Athrun smiled at her. Even though her cheeks were red and blotchy from her tears, she still looked so beautiful to him. And as she stared at him, tear bubbles floating gently around them like tiny crystals, what he had always known inside finally developed words.
"Cagalli. I love you."
I believe everlastingly…
Just a note. The lyrics (the italics) are from the song "Pride", which is the 2nd opening for Gundam Seed Destiny. Lyrics were translated into english by lacus at Livejournal! Thanks to her!
xxravenwingxx
