Of Wagging Tails and Sniffing Butts

Chapter 4:

Mission Impossible, and Adonis' Peace Mission


The Mission Impossible II theme was SUPPOSED to play in the background, but instead, Enter Sandman, by Metallica, which I do not own, along with M.I., started playing.

Mari whacked the computer, and M.I.2 started playing.

Raven and Beast Boy crept along the streets of Jump City, as Beast Boy hummed the tune. Raven sweat-dropped, staring blankly at her 'master'.

"Is there any way that you can stop doing that?" she asked, well, more like PLEADED.

Beast Boy frowned. "You mean . . ." His eyes glistened with unshed tears. "No more James Bond?"

"No more James Bond."

"But Raeeeeeeeeeeee"

"Come on, we have BIGGER things to worry about," Raven replied, walking down the street, while her green companion stood, still shocked about no James Bond.

Finally, he shook his head, coming to his senses as he darted after her. "Hey! Wait up!" he whined, folding his arms across his chest.

Raven's nose was sniffing the ground as she walked slowly, step by step, head lowered to the sidewalk. "Beast Boy?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up. You're breaking my concentration."

"Oh! Sowwy."

" . . . If I always tell you that, will you immediately stop?"

"Yeah . . . unless you're making out with me or orgasming with Robin."

"Orgasm with Robin! Yuck!"

"Yeah, I know! If you orgasm with ANYONE, it should be ME!"

That comment left a heavy silence in the air.

Beast Boy winced at his comment, kicking himself mentally as he rubbed his temples. Raven had paused mid-sniff, and slowly looked back up to him.

"Really?" she inquired softly.

Opening his eyes, he looked at her, eyebrows lifting. "I-I guess i-if you w-wanted t-to . . ."

"Yeah, but, if YOU had a choice?" She asked, leaning in closer to hear his answer.

"Y-Yes," he answered inaudibly to human ears, but to canine ears, it was hear-able. XD

Immediately, Raven jumped on BB, licking his spandex-clad leg and barking happily. He had covered his eyes with his hands, but created a peep-hole through the fingers, looking down at the tiny dog. "O.O Is that a good thing?"

"I know this is totally OOC, but . . . YES!"

He picked her up, letting her tongue attack his green-skinned face. To his own surprise, her breath didn't smell like that of an average dog's, but more . . . sweet, and unique, to his liking. Stroking her back and feeling the cool breeze of her tail wagging happily, Beast Boy kissed her warm furry forehead. "Love you too, Rae," he murmured.

x-x-x-x-x

The sound of a toilet flushing echoed throughout Adonis's 'pad', which was actually like one out of the 70's, filled to bursting with love beads and bean bag chairs, not to mention the flower power rugs, and Disco lights. A relieved 'Ahhhh' came from 'the Loo', as the bathroom door opened, and Adonis stepped out, fully steroid-ed in his cherry-red suit.

Normally, one would not use such metaphors when referring to an over-masculine/macho villain, but in this case, I will, because I have a confession to make to you readers out there.

Adonis . . . was not masculine. Or macho.

He was a feminine pansy.

How sad is that, may I ask?

Sad to the limit.

Ah yes.

Adonis pulled back the daisy curtains obscuring his windows, peering out. There was a dog peeing on the grass of his front yard! Grabbing a daisy broom, the villain held it in a high sweeping motion, scurrying outside.

The dog was quite relieved that its bladder was now also relieved as well, and began to do a little dance.

Now normally, you don't see or hear of canines doing little dances. But if you read the last chapter, then you probably realize Adonis's diabolical plan to morph humans into animals, right?

Well, this dog was a result of one of those experiment-things.

But as the dog looked up, it shrank back as Adonis bounded out the front door, holding his broom up high menacingly above the small mutt. "YAHHHHH!" the villain cried as he brought the broom's bristly-end down onto the doggy.

The dog yelped as it's noggin was smacked, and it's tongue flipped out of its mouth. But that was not the only thing that flip. The dog lifted a paw, flipping it's dagger-nailed midder finger in the direction of Adonis.

Adonis squealed like a little piglet, lowering the broom until it fell uselessly from his hands, and he held up a peace sign, anime-style. "Spread the love, dawg!" he told the dog, flipping his 'hair' (that was not there) and whirling around, placing his none-peacesign-holding hand on his hip as he strutted back into the house.

The dog stared blankly after him, until it bolted off in search of the Teen Titans.

x-x-x-x

A/N: Sorry 'bout the short-ness of this chapter. But that's what you get when Writer's Block rules the roost.

-Mari-Chan, the Muffin Queen.