A/N: Lots of lovely bagels to LS for helping me out with this… Have a topping of your choice, too. :D
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They sat together on the couch for a while, talking about Curio. The cat herself seemed to be ignoring them. Sara was stroking her absentmindedly; as she listened to Grissom speak. His voice was soothing, like Curio's purr, and she felt totally at home.
"… and I found her there."
"In a skip?" Sara was shocked. This bright little thing looked like she had never wanted for anything.
"Inside a plastic bag, out behind the CSI Headquarters." Grissom gently rubbed Curio's ear. "She was starving and cold, and she was so thin." He gazed at Sara with deep grey-blue eyes. "It was close. If I hadn't heard her mewing..."
Sara was seeing Grissom in a new way. In his home he was opening up to her, and it seemed he didn't even realise it. The guardedness was gone, there was only the man himself sitting in front of her. This is what she had always wanted from him. She wanted him to let her in, to let her get close.
She hesitated. Was it all too late? She had tried to move on from the love she carried with her, that love that had blistered and hurt her, and she had left him behind… hadn't she?
She placed these thoughts to the back of her mind. She was still feeling off balance, though a little better for being at the new Grissom's side. She couldn't explain why, but it made her feel comfortable, like she belonged there.
"I bet she's grateful."
"She's happy. That's what counts."
"Yes."
Grissom rose, and picked up Sara's empty coffee cup from the table.
"More coffee?"
Sara paused. The coffee wasn't doing anything to help her.
"…Have you got anything…stronger?"
Grissom raised an eyebrow at her. "Aren't you on painkillers?"
"I didn't take them." At the concerned look on his face, she added "It's ok, it doesn't hurt. See?" She lifted her plastered arm as if to prove it.
"Sara…" His voice was hard and reproachful.
"Grissom…" She mimicked him, giving him just a glimpse of the old Sara, making him smile.
"I don't think you should be drinking." He shook his head.
"Really? I think what I need is a drink. I am a grown woman, Grissom, I am allowed."
Her eyes pleaded with him to say yes, and he gave in, partly to avoid an argument, partly because it would make her happy. This was a habit he would have to get rid of.
"Ok then. One drink. I should have something around here. Depends whether or not Cath drank it all…" Sara frowned slightly, but he didn't seem to notice, padding off into the kitchen once more.
For a moment he fished about under the breakfast bar and soon he turned up half a bottle of vodka and two glasses. He poured a little vodka into each glass, and began to walk towards the lounge once more. Passing his freezer, he paused for a moment. Did he have anything for her to eat?
He placed the glasses on the countertop and pulled it open.
He rummaged for a moment and then pulled out a small box.
"…Microwave for 10 minutes." He read, quietly. Taking off the wrapping, he did as instructed.
"Want anything with it? I have some orange juice…" He called to Sara.
"Fine." She absently called back. Her mind was far away, on thoughts of other things. He could have offered her cyanide, and she wouldn't have refused it.
How often was Cath here?
She involuntarily felt a twinge of jealousy, somewhere in a long forgotten place.
Back when she loved him, she had felt it a hundred times a day.
When he had chosen to work with Warrick or Nick, it was bad.
It was worst, however, when he chose to work with Cath.
What was she doing, feeling it again?
"Here you go." She was pulled out of her daydream by Grissom planting the glasses on the table in front of her, followed by a carton of orange juice.
"Thanks." She reached out to pour some juice, unscrewing the lid rather nimbly with one hand. Grissom was impressed.
"You adapt quickly…"
She looked over to him, and saw that it was a genuine compliment. She smiled. "Always do."
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She sipped her drink, wincing slightly at the alcoholic kick it held. She blinked slowly, the exhaustion and stress still weighing heavily on her shoulders.
She felt totally drained.
After sleeping for only a couple of hours at the hotel, she had then lain awake in the soft darkness, flinching at every tiny sound, thinking about things that she couldn't quite remember now.
For a time, she had watched Grissom as he slept, the soft breath passing through his full lips, barely making a sound. This memory made her the most content, for reasons she didn't fully understand, only knowing that she could have watched him sleep forever. It was when he began to stir that she had dived for the sanctuary of the bathroom.
Now, she realised that as she sat on the couch with him just a few feet away, that nothing could ever be the same again. The last few days had turned her world upside down, and she didn't know if she liked the way it had become.
Suddenly a loud beeping interrupted her thoughts and she jumped violently, spilling her drink. Curio, startled by her sudden movements, dashed from Sara's lap in a flurry of claws and fur.
"Shit." She muttered, her heart pounding in her ears, breath fluttering in her throat. Placing her glass down on the table, she began to franticly wipe her trousers with her hand, cursing under her breath. She was mad at the fact she had jumped at all, not that she had spilled her drink.
"Sara?" Grissom edged along the couch towards her, just slightly. "You ok? It's just some food I put in the microwave." He gently reached out, placing a hand on her back to calm her. She startled at this unexpected touch.
"Hey, it's ok."
Ignoring her reaction, he left his hand on her back - just to let her know he was there.
"Shit!" Sara lashed out, punching a cushion violently.
Grissom smoothly rubbed Sara's back, but still kept the distance between them.
"I hate being like this! This isn't me! This is someone else! Shit!" She punched the cushion once again, harder still.
She rounded on Grissom, practically shouting. "Look what he's turned me into! Look who I've become! Look at me!" She gestured wildly around her, causing Grissom to recoil slightly, and his hand to leave her back.
She collapsed, taking her head in her hands and running her fingers almost viciously through her hair. Then, slowly, she looked over at a slightly dazed Grissom.
"What can I do?"
"Scream, if you want." He answered quietly. She looked at him, confused for a moment. He shrugged shakily, and managed to keep all but a waver of emotion out of his voice. "No neighbours."
Sara turned away from him, and let out an angry cry, full of pain and frustration.
Grissom wanted to hold her close, her heartrending cry reaching deep into him, but he allowed her the space she needed, because he knew she couldn't continue like this.
When she was spent, she allowed herself to fall back, allowing her rigid body to relax. She felt worlds better, and almost didn't notice the tears rolling down her face.
She pulled her knees up to her chest, and wrapped her arms around them as best she could.
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As Grissom wrapped his arms around her, and she rested her heavy head on his chest, Sara sobbed softly, mimicking the aftermath of the rescue.
Now though, these weren't tears of relief. These were tears that held all her pain, physical and emotional, the long term effects of the incident arriving, making themselves comfortable.
Huge glassy tears rolled along her nose and dripped onto Grissom's shirt, the dampness spreading, making a dark stain.
He didn't know how long he held her. Time seemed completely irrelevant.
To be this close to anyone, in the emotional sense, both frightened him and held him in awe. He looked down at Sara, her dark curls dishevelled and tangled. He couldn't see her face, and he was almost glad. To see her face now would push him over the edge and down into tears with her. He had to stay strong, for as long as she needed him.
He took a deep breath and told her over and over that it was going to be alright, in nothing more that a whisper. He hoped she heard him.
After a while, her sobs died away, and her breathing lightened. Grissom felt her go limp in his arms, and he realised she had cried herself to sleep. Smiling half-heartedly, Grissom pulled the throw from the back of the couch down around Sara. She shifted slightly at his movement, but did not wake.
"…Oh, Sara. We'll be ok." Grissom murmured, as he stroked her hair lightly.
Soon, he too was sleeping deeply, kept warm more by her body than the blanket.
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Cath span the wheel and pulled into Grissom's drive. The first light of dawn was creeping over the Vegas landscape, and she had worried about Grissom and Sara for a whole shift. She was just going to stop in for a minute and ask if they needed anything.
After that strange phone call, she had slept for a good seven hours, and then crawled into work.
After about half an hour of meandering around the lab with the feeling that the place was empty, she ended up in the PD bullpen, and found out that Sara was staying at Grissom's, and that they seemed better.
She walked up to the front doorstep, and knocked gently.
Nicky and Warrick had wanted to accompany her, but knowing Grissom's love of his privacy, she had insisted that she come alone.
Hearing no answer, she pulled her keys out of her purse and found the one that fitted Grissom's door. He had given her a key a long time ago, and she had rarely used it.
She pushed open the door slowly, and stepped inside.
They're probably asleep, Cath thought, as she made her way into the lounge.
She was only a little surprised at the sight that she found there.
Grissom was slumped over the arm of the couch, hand resting on Sara's shoulder. Sara was looking considerably more comfortable, with her head in Grissom's lap and the majority of her body covered in the throw that used to grace the back of the couch. Cath smiled.
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