A/N: hello people!!! i am SO sorry to have kept you waiting, but i was unsure whether this chap was worthy of you, cus it took me so little time to write, and i admit i didn't put much effort to it... and you'll probably notice, and i am SO sorry... please enjoy it the best way you... (and i must say, that it's brilliant that thing with the ruler icon)


Chapter IX

Waiting for Vladislaus' reply on my letter, I was unable to think, or worry, about the wedding plans, which at the moment was nothing more than a promise; a promise which easily could be broken by the Vatican. I was more worried about whether Vladislaus might think my letter was too court and, perhaps, nothing like my earlier letters, at all.

I knew the battle between them, Vladislaus and Ronan, though I had to say that they were so much alike, at least in my opinion. They both liked to fight on the rugged battlefield, both charming, both had a sense of childish playfulness, and the need to express their feelings, but having a hard time doing so, though there were one or two differences, but they were in some way not that important: Ronan was attractive in a 'high-light' kind of way, and he was of no noble blood. On the other hand, Vladislaus was noble, but he was attractive in a dark brooding way, which only seemed to make him more alluring.


One day, about one and a half week after Ronan had left, a letter arrived. It had the seal of the Vatican on it, and I suddenly felt nausea well up inside of me. It might be a letter telling me that we had formally been denied marriage, or maybe that he had been sentenced to death for fooling around; how was I to know, I hardly knew anything about their rules! Again, I got that out of my head. I was just so nervous and happy at the same time and it all just confused me. It didn't help that I felt annoyed with being so worried. It was just inexplicable to say how I felt. But it all just went away when I saw that I was sent from Gabriel, which baffled me; why would he send me anything? On Vladislaus' behalf, maybe?

I opened the envelope as I got to my room. I pulled out the letter it contained and read to myself a few times.

I was astounded by the letter, as well as relieved. I had not been given any bad or fatal facts on how Vladislaus were, luckily. But he had offered his friendship, and thinking about it, I had to say he was right. It might turn out to something good, because in my heart I already had forgiven him. I wrote him a letter telling him it was accepted, and that he had to come by and that he was welcome to come at my wedding.


Vladislaus' letter had lain in the desk drawer, for nearly a week now; he had not been able to get it out and send it, but the day that Ronan came in, he couldn't get it going fast enough, even though he was drunk, a lot, to say it mildly. He had a hard time even looking straight. He was almost the only one who saw Ronan come in, because it was in the middle of the night. He took out the envelope with his letter for Cassandra, and the silver-ring.

He staggered through the halls and corridors and nearly stumbled through the door to the mail-room, letting the letter fly from his hands and onto the floor, and him self went rambling into a 7-armed candle holder, which was lit. The five of the seven candles died out in the fall, the other two went rolling onto the table and the floor burning a hole in the material. Vladislaus noticed nothing, he jus left, letting the mail room to burn, feeling his world go entirely black and his memory going blank.


I had received a letter from Ronan, which took all other worry out of my mind, and entirely replaced it with happiness. The letter said:

"My dear love, Cassandra,

I have wonderful news. I have spoken with the Cardinal, and he is happy of my decision. He even said I had his blessing, and that he would personally marry us in the Vatican's Cathedral if you want it? He was a little concerned about if I had made the right choice, for we have only known each other for a short period of time"

'Great!' I thought while reading this. 'Ronan is favoured over Vladislaus! By the Cardinal! Dear God.' I read on:

"How are you anyway? I miss you so indescribably much, and I am almost not able to bear it. I long for you so much; your luscious lips, you beautiful eyes, the smell of your hair, you, your scent, and your beautiful curves."

At this I blushed furiously, and even though I knew nobody was around, I looked around to get myself assured. I didn't know what to think, I was a little distorted by it

"I should be able to turn home in 2 weeks or 3, as the Cardinal had had me signed up for a small mission before we left. Don't worry, it's nothing lethal, just a little observation quest, which should take a few days, 4 maybe.

There has been a little assault on the mail room last night, but by whom I have no idea. And why, leaves the most of the involved order and myself in wonder; why burn the letters, even in our own quarters? The little fire was discovered very late last night, about the time I arrived here. I will send you a letter when I get back, but for now, I must pack up a few things and get going.

My love, from me to you.

I love you,

Ronan Kaylan."


After nearly 3 weeks passing, I had begun wondering why he had not answered my letter, Vladislaus. If he didn't want to talk with me anymore then… it was so hard, still; having to choose between two men I had grown to love, very fast. I wanted them both, though I knew I could not have them.

It was so miraculously funny that just because I had been a few days in Rome, I had gotten so acquainted with two new men, who had put a big part of my normal sense aside, not giving myself space to think about myself, and my feelings for Vladislaus. Now, I had begun thinking I was dreaming, still being that little helpless girl in my father's 'home'. Just dreaming of the life I could have. Of course, that wasn't true. It was impossible for me to plan anything, at all. I didn't want to take any part in planning a wedding. I wanted to go to Amadae for help, but it was so hard to do it. I had gotten so much from her; how could I ask for any more?

What was this marriage thing doing between Ronan and I so soon anyway? We had talked about his family, but if he had a house, a home was a blank side of him. How could they, Valerious and Amadae, comply to our wedding, when we had known each other for 2 weeks before he asked, and we had had s-… we hadn't even talked much together at that time. And on top of that, more anger welled up in me, towards Vladislaus; how can he just ignore me like that? I was confused. It was all so confusing.

There was a knock on the door, and Amadae came inside.

"Hello my dear. I've been wanting to say that, about you and Ronan; I am very happy for you. And I would love to help you make the plans, if you want to me to…?" she said.

I was about to decline when I saw the hopeful glint she had in her eyes. I smiled and nodded.

"I would really love you to help me with that," I said, and she came forth and dragged me out of my room and down the halls, saying she had all these great ideas, and the burden of insecurity, anger and stress lifted off of me, knowing I'd make it all.


Vladislaus awoke, sometime later than noon, and felt as though his stomach had been flipped, repeatedly, and his head was throbbing as though someone had been using his head as drum. There was a stank about him; one of liquor, which explained why his stomach and head hurt like that. Suddenly, he felt as though someone was pressing him lightly on the soft spot underneath his ears, behind the jaw bone. Then his spit tasted like metal, or blood and he got up and walked to a little bucket in the room, as fast as his head-throb would allow him. He filled the bucked almost to the brim, before it stopped washing out of his mouth like a cascade or waterfall of nearly digested porridge.

Where ever he went in his room now, the thick disgusting smell of vomit mixed with the dung oxygen in the room was every where. He went to his drawer and pulled it out to take a check on his letter, and found not to be in the drawer. He pulled the drawer out, glaring at its empty content. Where was it? Had he sent it yesterday, when he got drunk? He didn't remember anything, come to think of it.

Maybe someone had taken it to the mail room for him, or something. He could of course send a new letter, but wouldn't that truly embarrass him, and make Cassandra feel threatened on Ronan's behalf, if she got two letters with the same content? He tried to remember last night, but it was impossible. All he could remember was that Gabriel had been there to tell him something about him going to pre-scout something, and that he was waiting for a company which was supposed to come in the same night.

He thought a little about it, and then remembered that Gabriel had been there one more time, asking if he wanted to come with him somewhere, but had told him to stay put, and stop drinking, and that Vladislaus himself had said that he couldn't care less for what Gabriel might order, and that he was not nearly done drinking, and that, that was his own business. Now, he wished he had taken the advice. Perhaps Gabriel had taken the letter along for him. He'd ask Gabriel but it could have been anyone. He was too tired to think about it; the memory of last night was so clouded, it was just a blank piece of parchment. He crawled back into his bed, falling asleep immediately.

When he woke again, he didn't bother to ask anybody about the letter, for he had simply registered it in his head that it was sent, personally. Neither did he know about the careless little fire in the mail room. The monks had just assumed the candles had fallen over on their own strange accord. Needless to say, nobody took further notice of it, so why bother telling a war hero as great and grand as Vladislaus Dragulia about a minor 'accidental' fire?


A/N: hey, read and review, and i really need you to send me a mail helping me planning a wedding, or how to make progress on the thing... i know what'll happen next, i just don't how to plan the wretched wedding....! please, HELP MEEEEE!!!!