Chapter Six: Joey's Pizza
Disclaimer: I own nothing, not Alias or its characters, just a ham sandwich and a soda, but no one cares.
AN: Sorry it's taken me so long to update. I went back home for the summer and the computer at home doesn't really work. But I'm back now and my computer is virus free so I will be able to finish the story soon. Please Read and Review. Thanks and now ch 6....
As she drove back to the hotel she felt stranger than she had ever felt before. Her mind was a wreck. She didn't understand what was going on. She had been someone else, someone other than a cold blooded assassin working for the covenant. Her life had made sense then, it was a life she felt wasn't hers but it made sense to her. She had suffered great losses as a child and grew up to become a killer. The life they had given her made sense, but it never felt real. Now she was forced to question everything that she knew. She didn't love her life as Julia, but she understood it and even though it was a life full of danger, it was simple and it was hers. She knew now that it wasn't real. Or at least not completely real, Sydney, her name was. Was she really Sydney, or was she Julia, or perhaps she was both. Perhaps some part of Julia always existed within Sydney.
She felt a great sense of relief when she walked into her hotel room. She was so tired all she wanted to do was sleep. She fell into bed and closed her eyes trying to forget all the questions that ran through her head. It was in her sleep however that all her questions were answered. She dreamt of her life as Sydney, she suddenly knew who everyone was, she knew who Vaughn was. He was her soul-mate and she had left him. Not on purpose but still he had suffered.
When she woke up the next morning she felt so confused. She couldn't help feeling pain from the thought of Vaughn being with another woman. It had only been nine months since her "death" but she couldn't help feeling angry that he had moved on so fast. Her life as Julia had been a betrayal to her life as Sydney. As Julia she had killed, she had done things she wasn't proud of. The questions of the night before suddenly re-surfaced and she couldn't help but wonder if Julia had always been a part of Sydney. If she had lived as Julia so easily it had to be because deep down she was Julia. Her anger towards all those who betrayed her and those who stood between the life she had and the life she wanted had helped her get through some dark times. It was her anger and her need for revenge that had kept her going. Perhaps Julia was a result of those betrayals, and those desires for revenge. Ever since the death of Danny she knew she was different. It wasn't until now that she realized how different she was. She realized that she had a dark side. Julia wasn't just the fabrication of the Covenant, she was also the result of all the pain that Sydney had endured.
She needed to come up with a plan. If the Covenant found out that she was no longer under their control she would be putting the lives of everyone she loved in danger. She needed to take care of this. First thing being Vaughn, his knowledge put him in great danger. He wouldn't give up on her, he wouldn't just leave it alone, she knew he had to do something about it. She picked up her phone and dialed his number, a number she knew by memory. It rang twice before he answered the phone.
"Hello." Vaughn answered.
"Joey's Pizza." She replied with an accent.
"Wrong number." He said after a moment.
She arrived at the warehouse where they had met so many times before. He was already there, always on time, he was wearing a gray suit. It felt so comfortable, it felt so familiar, it was just the way it had been years ago.
"Julia." He said with hesitation.
"Vaughn, it's alright." She answered.
"You remember then?" he asked.
"Yes, I do. Last night when I got back to my hotel room, I fell asleep. It was while I was dreaming that I began to remember everything. I had been remembering things for the past few months, nothing concrete enough to make me believe it was anything more than a dream. It was your face, I dreamt of you many times but I didn't know who you were, when I saw you the other day I realized that it was much more than just dreams. I'm sorry about hitting you." She said.
"What happened? Syd, you died." He said, his eyes pleading with her for answers.
"I was kidnapped after the fight with Allison. They made me watch while you threw my ashes at sea. They spent weeks torturing me trying to break me down until finally I cracked. They brainwashed me into believing that I was Julia Thorne. I've been living my life as Julia since then." She answered. Vaughn walked towards her slowly and then hugged her when he came close enough to her.
"I missed you so much. I thought you were dead. I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that." He said to her still holding her tightly. She began to cry, she felt sad and angry for what was done to her, for having been separated from those she loved.
"Vaughn." She said pushing him away. "You can't tell anyone about this. No one must know that I'm alive."
"Why not?' he asked with a look of shock on his face.
"Because Vaughn, if the Covenant found out I was no longer in their control they would use other methods. They would use you and everyone I care about to get to me. I can't let that happen Vaughn. I need to take care of this myself. I have a plan but I need you to go back to normal. Don't do anything out of the ordinary, anything that could give me away. That means that you and your girlfriend need to keep things the same way." She said. Vaughn looked surprised, he didn't think that she knew about her.
"Lauren." He said quietly. "I'm so sorry Syd. I need you to know that I love you, Lauren was just a way for me to try to move on. She means nothing to me. I spent six months grieving, losing myself. I thought I was going to die Syd. I needed to try to get my life back together. I'm sorry you had to find out about her." He said.
"I can't say that I understand Vaughn. It hurts me to know that you're with her. When Danny died, I grieved too, it took me a long time before I could see other people, but I don't blame you. You thought I was dead, and in many ways I was dead." She said to him.
"I love you." He said.
"I love you too." She replied. "I have to go now, but please promise me that you won't do anything, just pretend like this never happened."
"I can't do that Sydney." He said. "I can't pretend like I don't' love you, I can't pretend that you're not here. I need you Syd, I need to be close to you. I need to see you everyday, I need to hear you. You have no idea what it feels like to have you back again, it's like being reborn, like feeling happiness for the first time ever. Don't ask me to do this, because I can't." he said. He walked closer to her and kissed her passionately. She didn't push him away or hesitate, she just gave into the kiss.
"You have to." She said when they finally stopped kissing.
"What are you going to do?" he asked kissing her in between words.
"I'm going to take care of it, I'm going to bring them down from the inside." She responded.
"It's too dangerous Syd, plus it will take a really long time. Maybe even longer than it took us to bring SD-6 and the alliance down." He said.
"I know, will you wait for me Vaughn?" She asked.
"All my life. But I want to help you. Please let me help you." He said kissing her once again.
"I have to go." She said breaking their kiss. "I'll contact you as soon as I can." She began walking away when he called out to her.
"Syd wait." He grabbed her arm and kissed her once again. "Don't forget, I love you."
"I love you too." She said leaving. She loved him and being with him gave her a renewed sense of confidence. She knew that he wouldn't let her go this easily. He too had something up his sleeve, but it was nothing compared to what she had planned.
