My Immortal
Summary: Danny's life becomes impossible knowing he's ruined someone else's life. It's even worse knowing it's his best friend.
Rating: PG-13 for mature themes and language.
Disclaimer: I do not own Danny Phantom, Butch Hartman does. I do not own My Immortal, Evanescence does.
Chapter Three
I wish that you would just leave.
Danny awoke to the sound of his sister hollering up the stairs. He wondered when he'd fallen asleep. He had been working on his World Civics homework at four-thirty when he lat glanced at the clock. He looked towards his nightstand and groaned. It was noon; just a little passed actually. He shut the text book that was sitting on the desk before him. It was Saturday anyway. He had plenty of time to finish the last few questions.
He stood and stretched. He glanced down at the scab on his wrist. In hindsight, he almost regretted doing it. Not because it was wrong, but because his parents would probably be furious if they found out. He wished he knew for sure. Maybe he really didn't know his parents as well as he thought he did. He grabbed a sweatshirt out of his closet and pulled it on. He played with the cuff a moment making sure it covered his wrist.
Opening the door, Danny started down the stairs. He heard his mom ask Sam how she was doing. He paused not far enough down to be noticed yet. "Pretty good," came a soft voice. Danny closed his eyes. Suddenly hearing her voice seemed to pound home the point that there was no escaping her now. Whether he wanted to or not, he had to face her now. There was no running away this time.
Taking a deep breath, Danny trudged down the stairs a little louder than he needed to. All the heads in the room turned and looked at him. He pretended to be oblivious to it but he couldn't stop himself from glancing towards Sam. She'd lost almost all the weight she had put on during her pregnancy. But what hit him was the shadows under her eyes. She looked tired. A surge of self-loathing overtook him. Was life ever going to get easier for her?
He broke eye-contact and stared at the floor. Turning into the kitchen as soon as he got downstairs. He could almost picture Jazz's angry expression at the moment. He was being stupid. If he kept acting this way, everyone would know something was up. But he was afraid of what would happen when he faced her. He was honestly afraid of what would happen. He had secrets of what had happened over the past two months that he couldn't admit to her. He could hardly deal with them himself.
"What is up with you?" He spun at the sound of an angry voice. He glanced at his sister for a minute before grabbing a glass out of the cupboard. "I can take being ignored. I'm your sister, I expect to be. But she's your best friend. I'm sick of you giving silent treatment, Danny."
Danny turned on the tap and focused on the sound of the running water rather than his sister. She's your best friend. Not you're hers. Vlad's words echoed painfully inside of him. His grip tightened around the clear glass. He slammed of the water with more force than necessary. He walked past Jazz, not even glancing her direction. He turned out of the door to go up the stairs. But standing about four steps up was the last person he wanted to come face to face with.
Violet eyes caught his and he found himself unable to look away. There was this conviction in her eyes that he couldn't understand. But all he knew was that he couldn't look away. He stood there for a moment just staring and Sam looked down. "Hi," she murmured, brushing her hair back, tucking it behind her ear. He couldn't help but notice that it was much longer now, almost to the middle of her shoulder blade. She wasn't wearing it up today. He wondered if this was an everyday thing or just today.
He swallowed. He couldn't bring himself to respond, so he forced a slight smile and gave her a two finger wave. She looked down, then to the side. It was obvious she didn't know what to say. At least Danny was in the same boat as her. But what hit him in that instance was that the feeling of hatred was gone. But that didn't surprise him, he knew why.
Sam was the first to back down from the standoff. She slipped past him and ducked into the kitchen. The sound of her talking to Jazz reached his ears. Danny sighed, leaning against the wall. He didn't know if it was possible for someone to ruin their life like he had. It was his fault for walking into the machine. It was his fault that Sam had walked home that night. It was his fault he had killed his best friends baby.
He didn't know what he'd been expecting. He knew this would be awkward but this was the stage beyond that. This was impossible. He didn't expect her to forgive him far from it. He didn't know what he expected but this most certainly wasn't it. He wanted her to be the Sam he remembered, to having a definite opinion one way or the other.
In a weird way, he wanted to see her hate him. He didn't want to be forgiven. He disserved to be hated. He hadn't done anything to earn her forgiveness. He wished it had never happened but that wasn't merit enough to be forgiven. At least not for something of this magnitude. He wasn't lying when he told her he didn't want to be forgiven.
Which brought to mind another issue entirely. That day he'd left he'd been able to talk to her telepathically. He didn't realize he'd ever had that power. The fact that he got it right after losing his powers scared him. What if it was some sort of power that he shouldn't be using. Like some of the ones Vlad used. He was pretty sure that some of those were definitely not brought just because of his ghost powers, but the way he chose to use them.
He didn't want to become Vlad. But maybe the other half-ghost was right. Maybe this is out of his league. He wished for the countless time that things were different. He found that was all he was doing these days; wishing rather than doing. But there wasn't much he could do right these days. It almost seemed that by breathing he was offending someone. It was so frustrating.
Danny opened his eyes and ran up the stairs. Some of the water sloshed out of the glass and trailed down the back of his hand. He hardly noticed. He got to his room and slammed the door, shutting out the rest of the world. He slid to floor, setting the glass down on the floor next to him. He rested his arms on his knees. He couldn't believe how badly that had gone. He didn't know how it should have been different but that wasn't what he wanted.
He wondered if either him or Sam knew what they wanted at this point. They were almost done with Sophomore year, not quiet juniors. So why did he feel so old? He hated sitting in class everyday. It was as if there was this infinite distance between him and everyone else. He didn't know if it would ever go away. He wondered if Sam felt the same way. He didn't see how she wouldn't.
He rolled his sleeve up slightly and ran his finger over the thick scab. It had only been almost a week. He needed someway to hide it. It was pure luck that no one in P.E. hadn't noticed it yet. He wondered if anyone had noticed and not said anything to him. He couldn't see that being the case but it was possible. At least Tucker hadn't noticed.
There was another issue. Tucker was still mad at him and he couldn't figure out why. He didn't understand what he had done. It wasn't like Tuck to hold a grudge, especially when it was something so small the other one couldn't figure out what it was. In all the years Danny had known him, he hadn't done something like this. Sure, he'd been mad before. But nothing that lasted this long. He wondered if they were just growing apart. He really didn't want that to happen, especially not with Tuck.
He ran a hand over his eyes, leaning his head back against the door. He always heard growing up was hard but this was beyond that. This was the kind of thing that broke people. He silently wondered how much he and Sam could take. He hated how one thing just seemed to lead to another and everything went from bad to worse.
But the worst feeling was that all of this was his fault. The way it always went from bad to worse, and it was always him that caused it to turn. He hated the way those violet eyes that always sparkled with defiance know just looked haunted. He used to think that nothing was worse than the empty look that she used to have. He was wrong. That gaze of haunted betrayal was worse than anything he could imagine. And he hated knowing that he caused it.
Hey. If Danny chapters liked me this would have been out earlier. I will write at least two more before Monday. I promise. They are 50 longer than before. That's my treat for making it this far into the series. Here's to the VIPs of the day: fan, Terrasina Dragonwagon, Ryo's destiny, getfuzzyfan04, cheerin4danny, AngeloflLinght, RainbowSerenity, Janus-Wolf, DarkPunkGirl, MayB, The Fuzy Llama, Mrs. Granger-Weasley, Moody Maud, Spice of Life, The Angel of Anarchy, Sakura Scout, AREZAL, Chibi Millenia Phantom, WormmonABC, Samster the Hamster x2, Wind91Rider, and The Good Girl. Non-silent readers rule my world.
