Warnings: Shounen-ai, suicide/character death, lots of angst
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Broken
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The day after Bakura and Atemu left, Ryou was in shambles.
He spent the whole day locked up in Bakura's old room crying.
He missed school that day, but no one who knew could blame him. Yuugi wasn't there either.
o
The second day Ryou missed, Malik went to visit him.
When no one answered the door he just went in. It took him ten minutes but Malik found Ryou asleep in Bakura's room clutching the dull, cold Ring to his chest.
It broke his heart.
Malik decided against waking the sleeping boy and made some food for him, which he put on a tray and placed on the floor next to the bed with a note of explanation.
o
The next day, Malik brought Mariku with him(1). They found Ryou again asleep on Bakura's bed holding the Ring tightly. The food from yesterday was untouched and the note unfolded next to it. This time there was pictures spread out across the bedspread of Ryou and Bakura.
Malik quietly cleared the food away while willing himself not to cry. Down in the kitchen, while making more food for Ryou (just in case!) a few tears slipped out.
"Malik-pretty sad?" Mariku asked, wrapping his arms around his light.
Malik turned to face his dark. "It makes me sad watching Ryou. I know how much he misses Bakura. It makes me think of what would happen if I lost you." A few more tears rolled down his cheeks at the thought.
"Never leave Malik-pretty," Mariku said as he kissed the tears off of Malik's cheeks. "Never ever ever leave." He kissed Malik's nose. "Promise." The yami then kissed Malik deeply.
A sob from the doorway caught the kissing couple's attention. A rumpled Ryou stood there still gripping the Ring, fresh tears rolling down his cheeks.
Malik immediately broke out of the embrace of his dark and ran to Ryou's side before he could collapse. "Oh, Ryou, I'm so sorry. We didn't know you were there," he murmured into Ryou's ear as he hugged the distressed boy.
Ryou didn't seem to hear. He started whimpering, "He's gone…really gone…Bakura's gone. I loved him. He said he loved me. Now he's gone. Why? Why did he have to leave? I didn't want him to leave. He promised. He's gone…Bakura." Ryou sank to his knees leaning into Malik's embrace.
"Shhh…" Malik whispered soothing phrases into the other light's ear as he rubbed circles on his back like Isis used to do for him.
o
Ryou stood in the kitchen with a 'Kiss the Cook' apron on. He was humming along to the songs on the radio and twirling every now and then. He was making his favorite type of cookies – chocolate chip.
Bakura had been watching him from the doorway for about five minutes and Ryou had yet to notice him.
He watched as Ryou popped several pieces of chocolate into his mouth and started humming again as one of his favorite songs came on. He twirled again and accidentally tripped over his own feet but Bakura jumped up and caught him before his face was smashed against the tiled floor.
"Bakura!" Ryou chirped then realized the closeness of his yami and blushed a bright red. "How long have you been here?"
"Oh, not long. I was just enjoying the scenery." Bakura almost laughed, as his hikari blushed even more. He set Ryou up on his feet but didn't remove his arms from around the blushing boy's waist. "So, can I kiss the cook?"
Ryou attempted to look anywhere but at Bakura as he mumbled, "It's just a saying, Kura."
"Well," Bakura decided, as he put his finger under Ryou's chin and directed his gaze back to Bakura's own eyes, "It's a saying I rather like," And with that he claimed the boy's lips. Ryou gave a little squeak before giving in to his more dominant yami.
o
It had been three weeks since Bakura's departure and Ryou was slowly showing signs of improvement. He would eat more and occasionally left the house. He started going back to school, but whether he was actually there or not was debatable. He hadn't been turning in assignments or working on the late work he owed. Malik figured just getting up in time for school was good enough for now.
Everyday Malik would come over to Ryou's to make sure he had something to eat and someone to talk to. Mariku came as well but generally stayed in a separate room or out of Ryou's sight, figuring he was too much of a reminder of Bakura for him to handle right now.
Lately Ryou had been very quiet, only talking when directly spoke to.
They had yet to see Yuugi, but Malik figured that might be for the best.
o
The first time they did see Yuugi was about a month after the spirits had passed on. He was walking into school with Jou and Anzu, with bloodshot eyes and rumpled clothing.
Ryou noticed him first; in fact Malik hadn't even seen him until Ryou started silently walking towards him.
Both Jou and Anzu waved at Ryou as he approached and Yuugi offered a weak smile. Ryou gave the proper greetings before turning his attention solely to Yuugi. "I would like to speak with you. If we could meet after school?" Ryou asked softly.
Yuugi nodded his consent and they left for classes.
After the last class, Ryou stayed in his seat while he waited for the rest of his classmates to file out. Once they were gone he stood and faced Yuugi with an unreadable expression on his face.
"You wanted to talk, Ryou?" Yuugi said.
Ryou nodded. "I want to know why. You killed him and I want to know why."
Yuugi looked alarmed. "I didn't kill—"
"Yes, you did. You killed him. Sent him on to the Afterlife. I want to know why you felt the need to rip out the other half of my soul and send him away. I want to know why!" Ryou made his voice louder and firmer. "We were in love! Everything was supposed to be perfect! Everything was perfect! Until you went and found the Pharaoh's memories! I forgot that everything revolves around you! And your yami! You didn't ask us! We were happy the way things were! Why did it have to end?"
Ryou's voice cracked as he started crying again. "It always ends. Always. I just want him back." He sunk to the linoleum floor and hugged his knees to his chest.
Yuugi was crying too as he sat down beside Ryou. "I want him back too. I know he had to leave, but it's not fair. Why do we have to suffer? I just want my yami back."
The two boys held each other as they cried in that small Domino High classroom.
o
"Look 'Kura! It's snowing! I love the snow!" Ryou exclaimed as he dashed out the front door, a reluctant Bakura in tow.
Ryou, still in his pajamas, ran around in the snow thoroughly enjoying himself. Bakura, on the other hand…
"It's cold out here, hikari. Why are we out here again?"
"Because it's snowing, Bakura!" Ryou twirled around in the still falling snowflakes, before landing flat on his back in a snowdrift.
Bakura shook his head and sighed before walking over to where his not-so-sensible hikari was stuck in the snow and looked down at him.
Ryou giggled. "Help me up, 'Kura! I'm trapped!"
"It's your own fault. Maybe I should leave you down there to find your own way out."
The smaller boy stuck out his lip in a pout. "I thought you were supposed to protect me!"
The spirit sighed again and reached his hand down for his light to grab. When Ryou's pout turned into a smirk he knew he'd made a mistake but it was too late to pull his hand back. Ryou grabbed Bakura's hand and pulled him down into the snowdrift with him so they were both stuck in the snow.
After the getting all the snow out of his mouth Bakura turned his head to look at his laughing hikari. "I thought you were supposed to be the innocent one?"
"You've corrupted me," Ryou replied between giggles.
"So it seems," Bakura stated before leaning over and capturing the boy's mouth in a kiss.
When the two parted for air several seconds later, Ryou said between gasps, "How about we take this back inside where it's not so cold?"
Bakura grinned. "Corrupted indeed."
o
One of the first things Ryou had done when he found the energy to move around again was cover all the mirrors in the house. The small ones he had found a blanket or towel to conceal them but the bigger ones, he found, posed a problem.
He stayed up all night painting them black with some paint he had in his garage.
When he missed school the next day, Malik rushed over fearing something was wrong. He had found Ryou sound asleep on Bakura's bed still wearing paint-smudged clothes.
When he found the mirrors he realized what his friend had been doing all night. Malik smiled a sad smile and left them like they were, stopping to clean up the mess and make some food for Ryou when he woke up.
o
Ryou never slept in his own bed any more. He stayed in Bakura's room.
Recently he had taken to wearing Bakura's clothes. He applied the kohl Bakura had liked and he never left the Ring at home. Even though it was dull, cold, and three of the spikes had broken off he still wore it everyday as if maybe that would bring Bakura back.
Ryou always carried Bakura's favorite pocketknife around with him now, and got a week suspension for having a weapon on school grounds.
That didn't stop him from bringing it with him the Monday he got back.
Malik was worried about his friend, but there didn't seem to be anything he could do.
o
"When's your birthday, Bakura?" Ryou asked. They were lying on the couch in an embrace, just drifting in and out of sleep.Bakura propped his head up on his elbow so he could look down at Ryou. "My birthday? I don't know. I forgot it millennia ago."
"Oh," Ryou yawned. "That's too bad. Everyone needs a birthday. They're special."
"What's so special about a birthday? All it does is say, 'Congratulations! You survived another year!'" (2)
The smaller boy shifted to poke the spirit. "Don't be so cynical."
Bakura leaned down to place a kiss on Ryou's nose. "Sorry," he said, but didn't really sound sorry at all.
Ryou stuck his tongue out at Bakura but quickly pulled it back in when the yami made biting motions with his mouth.
Snuggling back into the thief's embrace, Ryou said, "You know, if you want you could share my birthday. I wouldn't mind. It's coming up in a couple of weeks."
Bakura smiled at his hikari. "Sure, Ryou. If that makes you happy."
He could feel the smaller boy smile against his chest. "Love you, 'Kura," he said sleepily.
The thief spirit smiled and wrapped his arms around Ryou. "Love you, too," he said softly.
o
On September 2nd, exactly six months after Bakura had left, Malik and Mariku went over to Ryou's house hoping to take the boy out for his birthday.
After they had let themselves into the quiet house, Malik called out to Ryou. When there was no response the pair went up to Bakura's room.
They found Ryou, seemingly asleep on his side with his back facing the door. Malik gently shook his shoulder trying to wake the boy. There was no response.
"Ryou, time to get up…" Malik murmured as he rolled the white haired boy over.
He was not expecting an empty bottle of pills and a note addressed to him to be clutched in Ryou's cold hands.
He was obviously dead.
Malik cried all night and there was nothing Mariku could do but hold him.
o
It took him week to read the note Ryou had left for him. Malik felt responsible for his friend's suicide, even though numerous people assured him there was nothing he could have done.
When he did finally read the note, this was what he found:
Dear Malik:
I know I owe you an explanation. After all, you've been so kind to me in these terrible six months. And you were my friend before that.
I know you probably stayed up all night crying when you found me and it's probably taken you weeks to read this, but I don't blame you. You probably thought I was getting better. That I would get over this.
But you should know, no one could ever truly get over losing their soul mate.
Every second of every day I can hear Bakura. He's calling to me from the Afterlife. It just gets worse if I try to ignore it. I need to be with him again.
I need to feel whole again.
That's why I'm doing this. That's why I have to leave. This day just made everything worse.
My birthday has so many memories tied to it. It was the first day I got the Ring you know. A birthday gift from my father. It was the first night we consummated our love.
That was six months before he left. A year later I'm leaving to join him.
So, Malik live a long life. You and Mariku deserve to be happy with each other. And when you're old and gray, you can come join us as well, but not a moment sooner.
I know what I'm doing, Malik.
I'm going to feel whole again.
Ryou
Malik stood in front of Ryou's grave after reading the letter and smiled.
"I understand, Ryou. I know you're better off where you are now than you were here, suffering and only half alive. I miss you, but I understand."
With those last words, Malik turned to leave the graveyard. He was joined by Mariku at the entrance and the two silently left, each thinking their own thoughts.
o
"I love you Bakura."
"You're so silly, Ryou. But I love you too."
"How long will we be together?"
"Forever. I'm never letting you go."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
o
END
Words: 2,397
Ahhhhh! I killed Ryou and Bakura! Ahhh:sobs:
Explanations:
(1) I swear I have a reason for Mariku still being there! He's not from the Sennen Rod, right? He's from Malik. So, when the other spirits from the Sennen Items left, he wouldn't go with them. He's from Malik, so Malik says when he leaves. And given a corporeal form he's just like a normal human except his mind is tied with Malik's. (I swear this all makes sense in my head.)
(2) Believe it or not, I have a friend who actually says this. So every time he does say it I just tell him, "Okay, we won't celebrate your birthday this year." That usually shuts him up.
And now I'm depressed. That was a horribly angsty.
I still can't believe I killed Ryou. :runs off to read some fluff-ness:
Don't forget to review, pretty please!
Dymond
