Chapter Two: Disbelief

Buffy's alarm clock rang but she was already awake, she had had very intimate dreams about Spike, and Willow had woken her up at about five O clock saying that her screaming was going to wake up the potentials. Speak of the devil, Buffy thought as Willow herself came into the bedroom. Sitting down on the bed, she spoke;

"Buffy, err…last night you were kinda err…" Buffy chuckled; Willow hadn't changed much since high school when it came to talking about sex,

"I know. May I ask what I was calling?"

"Buffy. You were screaming Spike's name at the top of your lungs, I think all the potentials heard it"

Oh my God, Buffy thought, the potentials! What the hell were they going to be whispering about her when she came downstairs?

"Did they say anything?"

"Well I haven't spoken to them yet but my guess is if they didn't hear it last night everyone will know about it in the next half hour"

"Oh God. What if they tell Spike? Willow I just couldn't live with the embarrassment! Plus he's seeing someone else"

"He's seeing someone else?"

"Yeah. She's like Drusilla the second except not insane"

"Is she a vampire?" Buffy nodded,

"I don't know what to do Willow! I lo…" Buffy stopped when she realised that her best friend didn't know her true feelings for the vampire,

"You what?"

"I love him"

"Really? As in the addicted to his body kind of love or the real thing?" Buffy blushed and gave Willow a look,

"The real thing. Willow I've totally fallen for him but he's taken. He's out of bounds!"

"And he loves you"

"He loves her; the way they act around each other it's just so…" Buffy gestured with her hands,

"Like the way you act around him?"

"What?"

"Oh come on Buffy! The way you look at him, the way you act around him; you could have toned it down just a little bit"

"Was it really that obvious?"

"Totally. Whenever both of you were in the same room everyone could feel the sexual tension coming off you in waves"

Buffy sighed, "But I missed my chance- he's totally into this other vampire. I mean, how can I compare? I was such a bitch to him last year and how the hell is he supposed to forgive for the pain I put him through? I used him Will"

"You were hurting. Buffy, you need to tell him how you feel"

"He's seeing that whore"

"Who cares about her? Buffy, there's a big battle coming up and both of you might not survive, if you don't tell him now then you're going to end up regretting it for the rest of your life"

"You really think so?"

"Yeah. Buffy he's never going to make the first move because he doesn't want to be shot down again but if you do…"

"I don't know Will"

"Buffy. Tell me exactly how you feel about him"

"I love him so much. Willow, I think he's the one. It's like Angel and Riley were just kinda practice loves and relationships and Spike is like the one I've been waiting for my whole life. There. I said it- that's exactly how I feel about him"

"Buffy you have to tell him now"

"Right now?"

"Buffy. You need to tell him before things get too serious between him and the whore"

"You're right. I'll do it"

Willow smiled and started walking out of the room before Buffy called her back,

"Will?"

"Yeah?"

"What am I going to wear? I mean, I wanna look sexy but I don't wanna look too obvious"

"You're asking the wrong gal. Hang on a minute" Willow went downstairs and arrived seconds later with Faith,

"So?" Faith said as Willow walked out of the room, "Sexy?"

"Yeah but…"

"Show me what you have"

Buffy opened her wardrobe and she and Faith rummaged through the clothes until Faith pulled out a low cut black sleeveless top,

"Buffy? You got a black wonder bra?"

"Yeah but I think it's a size too small"

"Perfect, get it out. Your top half has been decided, now what to wear on your other half…" Faith carried on rummaging through the clothes as Buffy put on the wonder bra and looked in the mirror. She hadn't known that she had that much cleavage to show off.

Faith unclipped a pair of light blue jeans from the hanger and laid it out on the bed for Buffy to wear.

Buffy walked across the cemetery in the outfit that Faith had picked out for her to wear. She had objected to the amount of cleavage that she was showing but Faith had insisted it looked fine, just right for seducing Spike.

"Spike?" the slayer called as she creaked open the door of the crypt, she really hoped that Kathryn wasn't there with him because she wanted to have Spike all to herself, sharing him with anyone else wasn't an option.

"Spike?" she called again. She mentally kicked herself. The sun was up so he'd be in bed now duh!

Creeping down the ladder to the lower part of the crypt she was pleased to see that Spike was sleeping alone, his delicious top half was showing and Buffy wondered whether he slept like that deliberately to seduce women.

"Spike?" she whispered softly, shaking him until she saw his eyes open,

"Buffy" he said, "What are you d…" he trailed off when he saw what she was wearing, "wow" he managed to choke out, "you look beautiful"

Buffy couldn't help but blush at his choice of words, luv, pet and sweetheart all made her a little wobbly but beautiful made her feel like a goddess,

"Thank you" she said, lying down on the bed next to him, she took a deep breath, Willow was right, she would have to make the first move,

"Spike, there's something I've been meaning to tell you…"

"Yeah?"

"Well err…have you noticed that I've been acting a little err…differently around you lately?"

"You haven't beaten me up in a while, is that what you're here for? Cause I really don't think that top was made for fighting"

"No. Spike can I ask you something?"

"Go on"

"Right. Err…how serious are things between you and Kathryn?"

"We only met yesterday but I think…"

"You think what?"

"I think we're falling for each other" As soon as the words left his lips Buffy felt her whole world collapse around her, she had missed her chance, he had finally moved on.

"Oh" she managed to choke out through her unshed tears that were forming in her eyes, one of them dropped down her cheek,

"Luv? Are you alright?" she looked deep into his eyes and shook her head,

"No Spike I'm not. First you tell me you love me and then you're off falling for other women,"

"Are you jealous?" Spike asked and Buffy paused for a second wondering whether to tell him the true answer, slowly she took his hand in hers and nodded,

"Yes" she said, "Seeing you with her, it just makes me feel so…I just don't like seeing you with other women when you're supposed to be with me!"

Buffy took a deep breath as she suddenly realised what she had just said, she looked up at Spike who was a wearing a shocked and surprised expression on his face,

"I…I'm supposed to be with you?" he asked quietly, his brain still processing the information that it had just been given,

"Yes, I…I love you Spike" she whispered, the surprise shown across his handsome features increased but she leaned in and kissed him anyway. It was so soft, so sweet, so right Buffy thought as she pulled away and looked into his eyes,

"Please be with me" she said to him, he responded by kissing her tenderly again, she quickly deepened it and they fell onto the bed, lost in each other.

Buffy was lost in ecstasy, her arms where wrapped around the vampire's neck, toying with his blond curls. Whilst his hands where…everywhere. A loud sound of someone clearing their throat broke the two of them apart and Buffy gasped when she noticed Kathryn standing at the foot of the ladder, a very annoyed look on her pale face and an umbrella in her hand.

"Slayer" she hissed, "what do you think you are doing? Get your own vampire…this one's mine" Buffy looked across at Spike, who was just staring at Kathryn with wide eyes. She knew that she was going to have to explain.

"Kathryn." She began, "I need to tell you something…" Buffy stopped when she saw Kathryn shaking her head and smiling,

"Spike just tell her to leave" she said. Spike looked across at Buffy and sighed,

"Leave" he said simply, Buffy felt tears sting her eyes,

"What?!"

"You heard him," Buffy continued to stare at Spike but could still hear Kathryn's nasty drawl in the background, "He just told you to leave"

Spike wouldn't meet Buffy's eyes as she stood up and straightened out her clothing, angrily, she turned on her heel and walked past Kathryn to the ladder,

"Oh and Buffy" She heard the female vampire shout as she climbed up, "You might want to try covering yourself up a bit more… 'The common prostitute' isn't the best look these days"

"Buffy, come out, you've been in there for hours" Buffy heard Dawn's voice through her bedroom door. As soon as she had got back from the crypt she had ran upstairs to her room and sobbed her heart out. She just couldn't believe it, all those times he had proclaimed his love for her and in the end when she had finally told him her true feelings, that she loved him back, he had chosen some dark vampire bitch instead. She looked up from where she was curled up on her bed to see her younger sister stood in the doorway,

"What happened?" she asked softly, "Is Spike alright?"

"How do you know I went to Spike?"

"Faith told me. So what happened Buffy? He…he still loves you right?"

"I don't know Dawn. I love him so much and seeing him pick that bitch over me…" Dawn held up her hand,

"Wait…there's another woman?"

"Another vampire. I kissed Spike and then she came in and then…" Buffy started to sob again; she felt Dawn's arms around her,

"Then what Buffy?" she asked,

"Then he told me to leave!" Buffy choked out, letting all her tears out as she sobbed hysterically in her sister's arms. She cried for a few minutes before taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes.

"Come on Dawn" she said shakily, "I gotta go down sometime"

"Buffy…"

"I said…I gotta go down. Come on…what time is it?"

"Late" Dawn said, "You were up here for ages. We were all really worried about you" Buffy looked at her sister before going downstairs and into the kitchen; she froze when she saw who was stood there.

"Get out" she said coldly, Spike raised his scarred eyebrow,

"We need to talk"

"I have nothing to say to you" Spike looked hurt at here words but continued to speak,

"Fine then. I'll talk; you listen…or give me funny looks. It'll be just like old times"

"I thought you loved me" Buffy whispered,

"You know I do"

"Not anymore I don't. I know you would prefer to be with that evil ho than me…someone who loves me wouldn't do that"

"Buffy, it's not that simple. I'm not gonna let you use me again like you did last year…"

"It wouldn't be like that…I love you. This time last year I didn't but now I do…so much"

"I don't believe you"

"What?" Buffy couldn't believe what she was hearing,

"I don't believe that you love me. I'm sorry Buffy but I have a girlfriend waiting for me at my crypt…which, by the way, I am living in now. I'll be there for you at the big battle with the first but when I'm not doing that I'm gonna be leading my own unlife. Just because I'm in love with you doesn't restrict me from doing things that I like doing, including, spending time with my girlfriend. I've had enough, goodbye Buffy" he leant towards her and placed a soft kiss on her lips before striding through the front door and slamming it behind him.

Buffy waited a few seconds before she sank to her knees and wept. That was it. She had sent him away. He had let her cause him so much pain, break his heart so many times and now, when she had finally fallen in love with him, he had gone.

"Buffy I really don't think that this is a good idea…" Willow said as she watched her friend angrily pack a stake into her slayer bag. It had been two hours since Spike had left and Buffy (fuelled by alcohol) had come to the conclusion that Kathryn needed to be taught a lesson for stealing the slayer's man,

"Just stay out of it okay?" Buffy slurred nastily at the redhead,

"You're just gonna end up making a fool of yourself"

"Willow, I'm a slayer, Kathryn…" she said her foe's name as if it was a parasite, "…is a vampire, a slutty vampire who needs to be punched back into line. She just sweeps Spike off his feet and expects me to just leave them alone…without a fight?"

"Why don't you just calm down and we can talk about this in the morning when you've sobered up…"

"I am NOT drunk!" Buffy yelled and picked up the bag, "Don't wait up for me"

Willow looked on as Buffy stormed out of the front door, she just hoped that the slayer wasn't about to do something stupid…

So what did you think? Any comments, good or bad are apprieciated.

Love ya all,

Yutsuko 