Disclaimer: I don't own anything regarding "The O.C." nor am I affiliated with any of the cast and characters used in the story. Anyone or anything that you don't recognize is mine, and anyone and anything else that you do recognize is not mine.

Against All Odds
Chapter 12 – Confessions

Ever since her conversation with Marissa a week ago, Summer had been thinking about Seth Cohen a lot. Where do they stand? What exactly does she want? An existing friendship or a relationship that is merely a possibility? Does he even feel the same way? For the most part, she could read him like a book, but until recently, he has become an enigma. Summer was hoping that they could continue being "friends" while she sorted her feelings, but Seth appeared to have other plans.

Summer has had enough experience with the other half to know that Seth was avoiding her. It probably would have hurt her if he was totally blowing her off, but she knew that it wasn't his style. If she didn't know any better, she would have guessed that he was scared of her. Many possibilities invaded her head, including the speculation that maybe Marissa told him something, but she knew that Marissa would never tell him something that important. She never did figure out what was going on with him.

That is why when she received a call from him earlier that morning, she couldn't help but be surprised. She was aware of the fact that he tended to ramble, but he just seemed flustered about something during their conversation. Actually, it wasn't even a conversation at all. Seth didn't really go into details. All he said was that he needed to see her. It was definitely a switch.

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"Okay… Okay… Breathe and relax… It's going to be fine… Who am I kidding? She's going to be here any minute now."

Seth paced in his office, failing miserably to calm himself down. The truth was that he was having doubts about his decision to call her, let alone ask her to see him. He had already pried himself away from the phone several times as he attempted to call her and cancel. While it sounded like a good idea at the time, he knew that she would only be more suspicious and would insist on seeing him anyway. It didn't really help that he's been trying to avoid her for the past week.

"This is all Ryan's fault."

Since his "discussion" with Ryan the day after Thanksgiving, things between him and Summer had been awkward. It was probably his own doing, but he couldn't help himself. Now that he finally admitted to his feelings, or rather said them out loud, it made his feelinga more real and more powerful. He used his time away from her to contemplate on the questions that had been plaguing him for the past two weeks. Should he tell her? What if she doesn't feel the same way? Does he really want to pursue something that is uncertain and risk losing their friendship? Could he continue lying to her? Could he continue lying to himself?

Before he knew what he was doing, his hands found his phone again and built up a brain of its own as it started to dial Summer's number. Frustrated, he put his cell phone away, putting it inside the desk drawer for good measure.

"I hope I'm not making a huge mistake."

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As she neared Seth's office, she was greeted by a smile from Jessica. She had visited him more than a couple of times already that it was almost customary.

"You can go on ahead," Jessica said.

"He's not in a bad mood, is he?"

"He's been out of sync all week," Jessica informed her. "I don't even understand half of the words that he's saying."

"That's actually Cohen on a good day."

"Well, you know him better than I do, but the guy's just jittery all of a sudden. I don't know what's been bothering him lately."

"I guess I'll find out soon enough."

Summer knocked lightly before slowly opening the door. She smiled when she saw him walking back and forth behind his desk. Judging from his facial expression, she knew that he was having a conversation with himself.

"Would you care to fill me in on your conversation?"

Seth's head shot up so quickly that it was a miracle that it remained on his head. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Jessica was right," Summer said as she approached him. "You are jittery."

"Uh… What are you doing?" he asked, backing away from her.

"I'm taking a seat," Summer said, his backward progress going unnoticed. "What are you doing?"

"You go sit on that couch over there," Seth pointed. "Sit. Over there."

"Okay," she said, eyeing him suspiciously.

She took off her coat and placed it on the coat rack along with her purse before taking a seat. When she looked at him again, he was still behind his desk and still talking to himself.

"Cohen!" she called out. "What's the deal? Are you going to talk to me, or did you call me just to see you talk to yourself?"

"Right."

He took a seat on the couch opposite Summer, but then immediately stood up after a couple of seconds.

"I wish there was an easy way of doing this."

"Easy way of doing what?" Summer asked, now thoroughly confused. "Talking?"

"Do you want to come by some other time?"

"No," she replied. "What is going on with you? You have been acting weird all week. You refuse to take my calls, and when you accidentally pick up, you make up these wild excuses not to see me."

"Does… Does that bother you?"

"Well, yeah, I mean, we've been hanging out for weeks now," Summer said. "I know that something is bothering you, because you just don't blow me off for no apparent reason."

"I wasn't blowing you off."

"I know, but you're shutting me out," Summer cried. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No, you didn't do anything wrong."

"Then what is wrong, because clearly, if it's not me, then it's you."

"Okay, okay, just calm down," Seth told her as he started to calm down himself.

"Why did you want to see me now after not seeing me all week?"

Seth breathed deeply and let out a sigh.

"I'm trying to make this easy, but apparently there is no way around it," Seth started. "First off all, I apologize if I hurt your feelings in any way this past week. It's not that I didn't want to see you or talk to you. I just couldn't bring myself to do it."

"Why not?"

"Because everything was complicated. Everything still is."

"What are you talking about?"

"I don't think I can do this anymore."

"Do what?"

"Do this," Seth said as he gestured towards both of them.

"You don't want to be friends anymore?" she asked, shaken that she had to ask the question in the first place.

"No… I mean, that's not what I'm trying to say."

"Then what are you saying?"

"This past five or six weeks with you has been terrific. I don't even remember the last time that I've had such a good time in a continuous period of time. It's been great having you around, you know, and I really appreciate all that you've done for me. Your friendship means a lot."

Seth paused for a moment and just looked at her. She looked so confused, and she had every right to be. He sighed once again before continuing.

"Lately, about two to three weeks ago, I've been having these… these feelings," he said as he caught her eye before breaking eye contact. "I don't know if I've had these feelings all along. Maybe I managed to suppress them somehow. The point is that in the last two or three weeks, I can't ignore them easily anymore. I tried, but I… I just can't do it. For all I know, I could be making a huge mistake here. I know that after I do this, there's no turning back. While your friendship means the world to me, I can't do this anymore."

"Again, what are you saying?"

"These false pretenses," Seth blurted out. "I know this could be all for nothing, and I'm fine with that… Well, I'm not totally fine, but I can deal with it. I'm just tired of lying to you… Lying to myself… I can't do it anymore."

"Cohen…"

"Summer, I like you, and I don't mean just as a friend. I really like you a lot. I care about you. I can't stop thinking about you. You… You just make me be a better person, and I know that sounds corny, but it's true. I can't stand not being around you. Lately as of late, I'm only happy when you're around. It's like everything just sucks until you show up or when you call. I know this is crazy. I've been thinking about it all week, and I thought to myself that maybe it isn't so crazy, you know. Maybe there could be a possibility that it could all work out."

"What do you want me to say?" she asked, although she really didn't know what to say at the moment.

"I just want you to tell me the truth," he said firmly. "Set me straight. If you don't feel the same way, fine, then just tell me, and hopefully we can move on from this. If you feel… If you feel something, anything, then tell me so we can both figure this out. I just want to know the truth. I know how I feel. I told you already. How do you feel?"

Summer met Seth's eyes, but this time he didn't look away, maintaining eye contact. He was challenging her, almost daring her to say something. As Summer continued to ponder on what just happened, Seth's sudden confidence started to wither away. Once again, he became the jittery guy who was pacing the room. He finally took a seat across her, but he was completely anxious. Summer had to admit that he looked cute as he played with his fingers, stealing glances at her every now and then. The truth was that she found her position quite endearing.

First, Seth just answered one of her questions in that he feels the same way. It made her feel a lot better, although she wasn't about to give him the satisfaction by admitting it to him. As much as she cared about the guy, history was against him. He hurt her twice already, even if it wasn't his intention to do so. She had to give him credit for being aggressive though. Knowing him, she knew that it was a hard thing to do. Now the ball was in her side. Basically, he was leaving it up to her to make the next move.

Second, now that he has poured his heart out, it helped her with the question what exactly she wanted. He was the guy who hurt her the most, and as crazy as it sounded, she wants to give him another chance. He said a lot of things, but she probably wanted this before he told her. Out of all the guys that she has dated, he was also the one who really loved her and cared about her the most. Maybe it was time for her to have someone make her happy for a change. Maybe it would finally work out this time.

Finally, if things are still complicated or uncertain, at least she has him with her to figure out everything.

"Okay."

"Okay what?" Seth looked up.

"Let's give this a shot."

"Are you serious?"

"Why would I be joking about this?"

"It's just that… Are you sure?" he asked once again, still not believing what he was hearing.

"We're you just kidding about…"

"No, but I thought that you were…"

"I was what?"

"Oh my… huh," Seth uttered before smiling nervously. "You're… You're really serious about this."

"You are asking me out on a date, right?"

"Yes, I am, but…" Seth muttered through a smile. "Wow… This is just… I am so relieved and so happy right now."

Summer tried her best not to smile. She was trying to be cool about the whole situation, but inside she was just as happy and relieved as he was.

"So what time are you picking me up?"

"Pick you up… Right, for the date, which is tonight… Is it tonight?"

"Oh, I just thought that…"

"Six-thirty sounds about right."

"Okay, then, six-thirty it is."

"Good."

"I'll see you tonight."

"Not if I see you first."

Summer just nodded before leaving his office. As soon as she closed the door, he couldn't help himself and just fell down the couch, laughing and smiling at what just happened. He laid down on the couch for a few more minutes before the apparent date later that evening dawned on him.

"Shit!" he said as he looked at his watch.

It was already one o'clock, meaning that he had about five hours to figure out what exactly they are doing on their date. He didn't even plan on anything. He was sure that she would say no, at least sure that the odds were slightly against him. Still, he needed to figure something out quick.

"We haven't even been on a date, and I'm already screwing this up."

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As soon as she closed the door, she finally allowed herself to smile and enjoy the moment.

"What happened in there?"

"I think we just agreed to go on a date."

"I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later."

"What?"

"I knew that he liked you."

"How?"

"Well, I know my method of knowing is unorthodox, but I only like Mr. Cohen when you're around."

"Really?"

"He's a completely different person. I dare say that he's more like himself. He just didn't strike me as a total jerk when he first came here."

"Well, I'll see you later, Jessica."

"Enjoy your date."

"Thanks."

She thought about what Jessica said as she left the building and couldn't help but feel proud of herself. As for enjoying their date, well, she knew that she would enjoy it, but dates with Seth never did run smoothly for the most part. In fact, he probably didn't even plan the whole date for tonight. She did kind of pushed him into doing it, and although she felt a little guilty about it, she knew that he wouldn't let her down. At least not this time anyway.