A/N: *grins and wiggles eyebrows* Okay Alec fans, think of this… Alec… covered in sweat… shirtless… ^^ *witnesses several reviewers K.Oed on the floor* I'll go fetch a bucket of water *looks at reviewers again* or maybe two…
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Chapter thirty-six: The Heart of a Child
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Max: I actually kind of feel sorry for guys sometimes
O.C.: Please
Max: They're prisoners of their genes
-Max and Original Cindy (Pilot)
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'Why are we afraid to be in love?
To be loved
I can't explain it
I know it's tough to be loved
And I feel you holding me'
-Michelle Branch (I'd Rather Be In Love)
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"Erin!" Jondy jogged up to Erin and Alec with Zane in tow. Max, Jax and several of the others could also be seen leaving HQ heading in their direction.
"That was SO cool!! I can't believe that actually worked!!" The smile on Jondy's face disappeared when she saw neither Alec nor Erin was smiling.
Erin nodded at Jondy and Zane and turned to walk in the direction of the infirmary.
"Where the hell d'you think you're going now?!" Alec demanded, not caring that he was making a scene in front of Jondy and Zane.
"To the infirmary. I keep my promises" Erin glared at him and glanced at his leg "Somewhere you should be heading too unless you wanna get your leg infected."
"My leg is fine, I can hardly feel it. That's not important; we need to talk about this now!" Alec glared as Erin continued to walk away. "Erin!"
"No Alec!" Erin spun round and glared right back "I don't WANT to talk about this now!"
"What's going on?" Max whispered to Zane as she, Jax and Lee came to stand next to them. Erin and Alec appeared oblivious to their audience.
"Lovers tiff" Zane whispered.
"You mean they're…" Max began with wide eyes and Zane shrugged.
"Not yet, but I had a little talk with Alec."
"'Bout time" Jondy muttered, her eyes still on the scene in front of them.
"Tough luck! We're talking about this now! You and Jondy left TC, going against orders, stole 2 motorcycles, caused a scene in front of the police and had about 30 of them chasing you!!!"
Erin ran a hand through her messed up hair and rolled her eyes. "First off, we had no orders about leaving TC. Plus there's the fact that I'm not a soldier Alec! I don't take orders from you or anyone else, no matter what you want! Secondly, we had to steal the motorbikes! You were a thief Alec! You can't get all high and mighty about that! Thirdly, I didn't get shot, White didn't see me, and hey" Erin grinned "it was kinda fun." The smiled disappeared "Oh yeah, and if Jondy and I hadn't left TC, you'd be DEAD right now!"
"Both of you could've been killed!" Alec glared, hating the fact that she could be all logical about this.
"It was our choice and we DIDN'T!!!" Erin glared "I helped to save your ass and this is what I get in return." Pulling off her cap, Erin tossed it to Jondy "Thanks for lending it me." Obviously, Erin had known they had an audience. "Can you give me a check up?"
Jondy nodded mutely and started to follow her.
"Jondy" Max put a hand on her arm "I want a report about this little 'excursion' as soon as you're done." Jondy nodded again and took off after Erin. Max turned to Alec who was still glaring after Erin. "Alec? I want you to let Jondy take a look at your leg. That's an order."
Alec nodded once and headed after Erin, limping slightly but showing no pain. He looked pissed as hell.
Alec followed Jondy into the newly cleaned up infirmary while Erin hovered in the doorway, watching but not entering. Jondy frowned but said nothing as Alec pulled down his jeans and sat down on an examining table. The bullet was still in and it was still bleeding. Jondy was going to have to remove it and cauterise it. This was going to hurt like hell.
"Erin? You're gonna have to help me with this" Jondy hadn't called in any medics to assist her because of whatever mystery involving Erin she was going to apparently bare witness to.
Erin didn't move. Jondy looked up to see Erin still hovering in the doorway. Jondy frowned again "What's wrong?"
Erin shrugged, trying to look nonchalant "Don't like hospitals."
"This isn't a hospital" Jondy wondered where this fear came from.
"It's close enough" Erin fidgeted under Jondy and now Alec's gaze. She looked around the large room, talking in the smell of antiseptic and the site of scalpels and other sharp objects.
"Erin, if you don't help Jondy, I'm going to bleed to death" Alec said quietly. He was obviously still pissed off with her but he knew she was scared.
Erin raised her eyebrows and both Jondy and Alec knew that she was probably holding back a sarcastic comment, but Erin slowly walked into the room. She kept away from the tables and walked over to them.
"I want you to pass me stuff and help keep his leg clean. This is going to be messy."
Erin nodded and waited while Jondy moved away to wash her hands. Erin kept looking around, not even thinking about the fact that Alec was sat in front of her wearing nothing but boxer shorts on his lower half.
Jondy walked back with a tray and put it on the table next to Alec. Erin immediately backed off, knocking into a trolley as she stared at the contents of the tray.
"I'm not gonna be able to help you" she swallowed, her eyes not moving. Jondy followed her gaze to the scalpel, knife, lighter and hypodermic needle on the tray.
"Erin?" Alec moved to stand up but Jondy's hand on his shoulder stopped him.
Erin didn't look away. "Alec, I don't give a shit what you say, nothing is gonna make me go anywhere near that tray."
Jondy's gaze ticked to Erin's hands clenched into fists at her sides. They were shaking. Slowly, Jondy moved the tray away to another counter, further away and Erin relaxed slightly.
"Don't worry; you won't have to go near them, okay?" Jondy spoke quietly, slightly shocked by the change in the usual cheerful though slightly sarcastic girl. "You can just keep the leg clean."
Erin slowly edged forward and accepted the cloth and cotton wool Jondy handed to her.
Still frowning, Jondy watched as Erin cleaned the blood away before going back over to the tray. Erin backed up as she brought the needle over and injected it into Alec's leg to numb it. Then, Jondy brought over the scalpel and started fishing around in Alec's leg, looking for the bullet.
Alec gripped the edge of the table and kept his eyes on Erin, still angry that she'd risked her life for him but now also slightly worried because she was acting as scared as she'd been when Logan had tried to take some of her blood.
After what seemed like forever, Jondy removed the bullet and put the scalpel and needle back on the tray, bringing over the lighter and knife.
Erin moved back over for this.
"You're scared of the needle and scalpel?" Jondy heated up the knife in the flame. Erin said nothing, just gently cleaned away the blood.
"No questions, Jondy" Alec said quietly and Jondy knew it was an order.
Jondy shrugged and put the red hot knife over his wound and Alec hissed. Thanks to his high metabolism, the drugs had already begun to ware off.
Jondy watched Erin out of the corner of her eye but saw that she only winced slightly. She had obviously seen and smelt something worse than burning skin if this only made her wince slightly. Jondy stored the information away.
"Done" Jondy announced after the skin was properly cleaned up and cauterised.
Alec pulled his jeans back on and Jondy handed him a pair of crutches.
"You'll need to use these for a couple of days at most. If you keep your leg rested, it should be back to normal in a few days."
Alec shrugged, took the crutches and limped away to sit on a table across from the one he'd been seated on. Erin sighed and took his place on the table.
"Okay Jondy, what you are about to see can not be repeated to anyone, even Max. Understand?"
"Why?" Jondy looked between Alec and Erin and back to Alec again.
Alec just shrugged "Erin doesn't want anyone to know about this. It has nothing to do with anyone and it's something she wants to keep private."
"Okay" Jondy replied slowly before looking back to Erin.
Erin didn't meet either one of their eyes as she slipped off her jacket and took off her tank top.
Jondy took in the sight before her. Erin's torso was covered in bruises and cuts. Jondy's eyes zoomed in on the scars. Moving slowly around the table, Jondy looked at Erin's back to see that it was the same. Jondy stared at them. They were done with precision. They were precise, the scares looked neat. Her eyes ticked over to the scalpel on the tray on the counter and back to the scars. She looked back up at Erin and understood her fear now. Nodding to herself, Jondy lifted up Erin's arm and rotated her shoulder. She felt the tight muscles in her back and arm and repeated the process to Erin's other arm.
"You've pulled a few muscles. They should be okay in a few days, maybe less if you relax some more. The cuts and bruises are healing really quickly for a Norm."
Erin nodded and put her tank top back and jacket back on. She moved to slip off the table but Jondy stopped her.
"No, I want to check out your leg."
"What's wrong with her leg?" Alec asked quickly, giving Erin a sharp look. She hadn't told him about her leg.
"I saw her limping" Jondy explained before turning back to Erin.
Rolling her eyes, Erin stood up and went to undo the zipper on her combats. Jondy quickly rolled a screen in front of the table so Alec couldn't see her.
Carefully, Erin slipped off her trousers and Jondy took a look at her legs. They were covered in bruises like her upper body and once again, Jondy found that she'd pulled her muscles, this time in her left leg. After coming to this conclusion, knowing Erin wasn't really paying attention, Jondy examined her legs and found even more scars, these had faded even more and had obviously been exposed to the sun and air for them to fade so much. Still, Jondy examined them. They were all between a centimetre to an inch and a half long. They were all neat, and some were ovals, some straight lines and some looked like little lightning bolts. Someone had taken a scalpel to Erin and decided to play. Judging by the way they had faded, they were old. Erin must've only been a child when it happened. Jondy didn't know why Erin was afraid of the needle but she suspected it had something to do with whatever Erin had gone through. Nodding to herself, Jondy straightened up.
"Again, the cuts and bruises are healing and you've just pulled a muscle. You'll be fine in a couple of days so long as you keep rested."
Erin nodded, pulled her trousers back on and pulled back the screen. Alec wasn't there. This was good; she wasn't in the mood for dealing with an overprotective jerk.
Walking out with Jondy, Erin felt like she was going to snap. Everything she did involving Alec caused trouble. She couldn't save his life, she couldn't go anywhere without him knowing about it, it was like he didn't trust her.
"Erin, we still need to talk" Alec was stood outside the infirmary door, leaning against a wall.
Giving Erin an apologetic look, Jondy left them to go give Max the report she wanted.
"I don't want to talk" Erin glared and started after Jondy but Alec moved to block her way. Even on crutches, he was incredibly fast.
"You left TC!" he glared at her and Erin shrugged, infuriating him even more. "You could've been killed! White could've spotted you and you'd be dead right now!"
"So would you if I hadn't turned up!" Erin glared up at him, he eyes turning even darker with anger.
"You shouldn't have risked your life for me!" Alec looked like he wanted to hit something.
"It was my choice!" Erin wished he'd just forget it already.
"Erin…!" Alec began but she wouldn't let him finish, she'd had enough.
"No, stop it" Erin interrupted him before he could go off on a rant about how she had to stay in TC where it was safe. "I'm sick of the way you treat me. I'm sick of the way you think you can tell me what to do." Erin turned away so he couldn't see how upset she was. "I go out there and save your life and this is how you treat me. I hate all of this shit. From now on, don't talk to me, don't even look at me and we'll be fine." Erin began to walk away but Alec grabbed her arm.
"That is not gonna happen" he said through gritted teeth, "we are gonna discuss this and then we're gonna discuss your fear of hospitals."
Erin glared openly at him and shrugged his hand off her arm.
"Will you stop that already?! I'm not some little fragile kid that you need to protect! I don't need looking after! Just because I've had a shitty past doesn't mean I'm gonna break down at any moment! I've done that already, several times over! I'm not gonna do it again and I'm not some little kid that can't make any decisions by myself, so why do you still insist on treating me like this?"
Erin folded her arms and waited for him to answer. All she got was the blank soldier face she had come to hate. She couldn't read him when he had his guard up. Staring into his cold eyes, Erin knew she wouldn't get an answer. Sighing, she turned around a left. She wouldn't talk to him again unless he apologised and decided to treat her better.
Alec stared after her, her words repeating over and over in his head. She thought he was overprotective. She thought he was trying to control her and he was in a way, and only now, after a simple chat with Zane and a long think as he searched for the bastards that had hurt her, Alec knew why. Staring after her, he watched as she walked around the corner.
Rubbing a hand over his face as tiredness took hold of him he repeated her question again. Why did he treat her like this?
"Because I think I love you…" he whispered and looked back at the spot Erin had last stood. Too bad Erin wasn't there to hear him.
3 days later
This was bad, Alec thought to angrily to himself. He was doing sit ups as if pushing himself to the limit would drive these thoughts and feelings away. This was definitely bad. Damn it! Why did he have to start feeling these things for her? Why did she have to look at him that way?
He'd lost count of the number of sit-ups he'd done somewhere past 800. He couldn't really focus on anything else.
She was 18 and had been through enough already. How old was he? Alec wasn't really sure- it wasn't like Manticore was big on birthdays. He'd figured he'd be around 20 or 21. Who was he kidding? Age had nothing to do with it and so what if he was beginning to fall for her?
Nothing would happen, he wouldn't let it. Everyone he cared about got put in danger or killed. He didn't want it to happen again.
Sweat trickled down his body as he pushed himself further- he must've broken a record already. The looks some of the X6s were giving him probably confirmed that. But, maybe not. About half of them were girls.
Alec caught sight of Erin walking by with Syl. Their eyes met for a second and with renewed energy, Alec sped up, pushing himself even further. She was innocent. He wasn't. They wouldn't work out. Erin didn't show it but she was more fragile than she seemed. Why did that make him like her even more?
They hadn't talked in 3 days. Erin was driving herself insane. As much as she tried, no amount of distraction could keep her mind away from Alec. The way he looked at her, the way he smelt- and she really wanted to know how he tasted but that wouldn't happen. She wouldn't let it happen.
'Yeah' an inner voice scoffed 'cuz you really keep your promises- you've already begun to fall for him!' Erin wanted to bang her head against the wall in frustration. The voice that sounded so much like Skye was sniggering and Erin wanted to make it stop. Why did the voice have to be able to mock, laugh and be logical at the same time? Erin ran a hand through her hair. Maybe getting drunk would help? No- she might talk on accident. Maybe she should have a make out session with one of the older X6s? Loads of them were giving her looks that said they wouldn't complain, even though she was an ordinary. Apparently, saving their SIC gave her more respect than she realised. No, doing something like that would make her hate herself.
Maybe he didn't like her and all she had was one of those pathetic girly crushes on him? Erin wrinkled up her nose at the thought of her acting all 'girly'.
'What about the smouldering looks he's been givin' ya?' the annoying Skye voice replied 'they don't give ya' the impression he's playin' the protective 'big brother' role do they?' 'The smouldering looks are the bad kind' Erin argued with the voice 'he's still pissed at me for leaving TC.' The voice just laughed and Erin put her head in her hands, a miserable expression on her face. Having a conversation with a voice in your head wasn't exactly something that screamed sane now was it? Erin sighed. Forget the voice, what about Alec? She was in trouble, real trouble.
Syl caught Erin's expression as she was walking towards the door of HQ. Doubling back, Syl pulled Erin with her saying something about a girls night.
Erin allowed herself to be lead through the garage, her mind still on Alec, which was when she saw him.
He was lying on some blue mats- like the ones Max and the others used for training. Several transgenics had put some out in the garage so they could still do exercises and spar when the gym and training hall were full.
Erin watched, her eyes wide as she watched his muscles flex as he moved. He was shirtless and doing some sit-ups. In the firelight she saw the sweat trickling down his abs and she absently licked her lips.
He did another sit-up and he spotted her. Their eyes locked for a brief second before she heard Syl calling her name.
Erin turned to look at Syl, realising that they were still walking. Syl gave her a knowing grin and continued to pull her along.
'Besides' Erin told herself again 'he wouldn't be looking for a relationship because of Rachel. He'd only be wanting sex and not from me cuz he knows I have a bad past.'
'Yeah' the voice mocked her 'whatever you have to tell yourself.'
Next Chapter: Sweet Misery…
Erin couldn't believe they'd do something like this to her. She'd thought they were her friends and then they went and did this. If they thought this was funny they had another thing coming.
A/N: Hehe, guess you guys liked that last chapter. Sorry there ain't any smoochies in this one but if you haven't noticed, things are beginning to heat up between them…
Marty: It's not my birthday until September but, yeah, you can by me a toy motorbike. Can it be a Fireblade? Pretty please? You know it ain't long until the smoochies take place. Yeah, he is taking his time but he's MALE!!
Cat: Sorry for the lack of smoochies but you won't have to wait too long for them
Riley: Sorry dude, it ain't Ben, and yep, Logan is puny. I'm thinking up new ways to bash him :P
Dominique: Nah, he doesn't go over to her world. There's gonna be complications…
Messymissy: Glad you liked it dude. Yeah, the familiars have a secret weapon. He's gonna cause real trouble in the sequel, and yes, Erin DOES meet him. I haven't written anything else about the training yet but it's not like Alec's actually fighting them… yet…
