Dragonlance Chronicles in a Nutshell

Dragons of Winter Night Part I

Elistan: The Hammer of Cars! (Presents to Hornfel)

Hornfel: The Hammer of Mars! What an insult! (Hits Elistan with the hammer) This belonged to the honorable Kharas! (Sniff, tear)

Tanis: We have lots of slaves packed into Thorbardin, but they refuse to work!

Laurana: (In dominatrix outfit) Get working you miserable servants! (Hits with whip)

Tanis: Ah. My precious. (Looks at her starry-eyed)

Sturm: I want the hammer! It's almost Christmas and I lost my nutcracker! (Breaks into painful sobs)

Tasslehoff: Lets go to Tarsis, where they have lots of pretty ships.

Raistlin: Whats the point?

Tas: They have the second largest library Pre-Cataclysm.

Raistlin: When do we leave?

Flint: Hey! Wheres Tanis&Laurana, Goldmoon&Riverwind, Caramon&Tika?

Raistlin, Sturm, and Tas: You do not want to know…

(Tarsis the ugl-I mean the beautiful Note: Tarsis is in ruins)

Tas: Hey! My emergency supply of sugar-high whip cream is gone! Who took it?

(Tanis, Laurana, Goldmoon, Riverwind, Caramon, and Tika turn bright red, lol)

Tanis: Ahem. Now, we are suppose to get captured by guards, according to the script the forestmaster gave m- Raistlin! What are you doing with it?

Raistlin: (Coughing pathetically and wiping him blood-soaked hands with the script)

Alhana: I need mercenaries! Help me! Please! (A waterfall of tear streams from both eyes)

Sturm: (drools) I'll follow you to the Abyss babe!

Alhana: EEEEEEWWW! Get away from me!

(Draconians come after them)

Raistlin: It is time to part. For some of us, we may never meet again in this worl- cough!

(Tanis, Raistlin, Caramon, Tika, Goldmoon, Riverwind, and Alhana are in Silvanesti)

Raistlin: I feel an evil aura around this place… (Shrieks suddenly) BUNNIES!

(Hordes of evil bunnies come to the attack and everyone runs in different directions)

Raistlin: Hey! My robes are turning black! I knew I shouldn't have used that weird dye my mother gave me twenty years ago to wash my robes on Sunday. Oh well. They go way better with my eyes.

Caramon: AAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Evil elves are trying to pry my genius brain away from me! (Swoons with horror)

Riverwind: My Que-Shu friends!

Que-Shu specters: How dare you miss our dummies celebration!!!!

Riverwind: NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Goldmoon: Ah! This branch tore off my necklace! Curse it! (Kicks the tree about to eat her really hard and breaks it)

Laurana: Hey! I'm at the Icewall! How did I get here? Oh! Theres Sturm! (Sturm is killed by the big green dragon Cyan Bloodbane) Oh, he died. Oh well. Who gives? Oh! Tanis darling, WHO'S THAT WENCH? (Tanis is with Kitiara, so Laurana grabs a sword and tries to kill Kit, but is instead eaten by the dragon, along with Kit and Tanis)

Meanwhile…

Flint is dying of old age.

Tasslehoff picked one lock too many.

Tika has learned that facing down a horde of dead specters is equivalent to signing your death certificate.

Alhana is being mentally tortured by Cyan.

And so here ends the quest of the companions, and the world was engulfed in darkness.

Not.

Raistlin uses him powerful magic gained from some weird old man he met with a really pretty necklace that he wanted. Then everyone found out it was just a dream.

To be Continued…

Notes: This story was not designed for accuracy! This was all about HUMOR! All the inaccuracies were on PURPOSE! This story would make much more sense to someone who has read the Chronicles.

Ex. Blue crystal stuff was referring to the blue crystal staff.

I didn't mention Eben, Fizban's "death", Lorac, etc.

I have read a lot of Dragonlance books, by Weis and Hickman, Elven Nations Trilogy, Linsha Trilogy, Kingpriest Trilogy, etc. I know my Dragonlance. Thanks to anyone who reviews this. If I get three more reviews I will continue the story. Theres no point in continuing a story nobody reads. Thank you for bearing with me.