AUTHOR'S NOTES: Wow. This entire story has taken on a life of its own. Where we are right now, and where we are going, isn't necessarily what I had in mind when I started, but hey… who am I to challenge the muse, right?
Thank you to all who have left reviews. They have definitely served as motivation to continue and without all of you this story would have ended a long time ago.
PHOTOGRAPHS (8)
"Gail, what do you think of that new anchor on the NBC Evening News?"
Donna Moss chuckled to herself in the doorway to C.J.'s office. Certainly the press would have a field day if they knew the most powerful woman in the United States was discussing men with her goldfish.
"Donna!" C.J. exclaimed, looking up from the fishbowl. "How long have you been standing there?"
"Long enough to tell you that I agree with Gail. The new guy is quite cute," Donna replied striding across the office and giving C.J. a warm hug.
"How are you?" she asked the older woman, noting the extra lines around C.J.'s eyes and the air of solemnity that she had taken on with the title of Chief of Staff.
"Good, good!" C.J. replied, waving Donna into one of the visitors chairs on the other side of the big desk. "And you? How is life in the private sector? Do you like working for Russell's campaign?"
Donna's face brightened at the mention of her new job, "Oh, C.J. I have an office. An office! With a door and everything. And a staff! I have my own assistant! I feel like Alice down the rabbit hole!"
C.J. laughed and leaned back in her chair. After only three weeks at the new job, Donna had developed an air of independence and confidence she had lacked in her years in the White House. The blonde was holding her head higher and spoke in a more self-assured manner than ever before – a far cry from the naïve woman who had talked her way into the Bartlet campaign all those years before.
"So what brings you to our neck of the woods?" C.J. asked, knowing that Donna had not been back to the White House since her departure several weeks before.
"Ginger and I are going to lunch," Donna replied, looking down at her hands nervously, "Josh is on the Hill for the rest of the afternoon…."
His name hung in the air awkwardly between them. C.J. had known that things had been terribly strained between them in the days before Donna's departure and that Josh had been miserable since then.
"C.J.?" Donna asked, "How is he?"
C.J. looked up at Donna and noted the concern in the younger woman's eyes. "You haven't talked to him?"
"No…," Donna looked at her hands and started to pick at the hem of her skirt. "I know that Ginger will tell me about how he is in the office and I know how that conversation is going to go, but I figured you would tell me how he is really."
C.J. sighed, "Donna, you know that it's not your fault. You aren't responsible for him."
"C.J…"
After a moment's silence, C.J. took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes, "He's miserable, Donna. He yells at Ginger and the rest of the staff and when he's not yelling, he's in his office with the door shut. He won't talk to anyone and he looks like he hasn't eaten in about two weeks."
Donna looked up at C.J., tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and took a deep breath, "Thank you, C.J."
"Donna…"
The younger woman stood up and smoothed down her skirt, "I should go. Ginger is going to be waiting for me."
"Donna, you aren't responsible for him."
"I know. I just needed to know how he is doing," she replied, her hand on the door.
C.J. stood, "It was good to see you."
"It was good to see you too, C.J.," Donna smiled opening the door and walking through.
C.J. sat heavily in her chair and stared at the door through which Donna had just exited.
"Gail, what are we going to do with those two?"
XXXXXX
Ginger was busy typing notes at her desk (My old desk, Donna noted) when she walked into the bullpen.
"Can you give me just a minute?" Ginger asked, looking up from her computer screen, "He's going to want these when he gets back from the Hill and I want to make sure they are done before we leave…"
"Sure," Donna replied, wandering around aimlessly.
"I'll be just a minute."
Donna found herself glancing toward Josh's office and soon, much to her own dismay, was standing in the doorway. It was messy as always, papers and files stacked everywhere, the chalkboard covered in names and vote tallies. Donna took a few steps inside and noted the familiar feeling welling up inside of her as she looked around. Suddenly, her attention was seized by a photograph on the wall behind Josh's desk. Walking over to take a closer look, she realized that it was a photograph of the two of them taken at one of the balls for Bartlet's second Inaugural. They were together on the dance floor, closer than one would have imagined for a boss and assistant, and they were both laughing and looking into each other's eyes.
God, he's so handsome, she thought. And I was too obvious for my own good.
"He got that from the Press Office after you left," the deep male voice behind her stated.
Donna turned to find Toby leaning against the door jamb, hands buried deep in his pockets.
"He hounded me until we found the pictures from the Inaugural. He picked that one," Toby nodded to the picture on the wall.
Donna looked back at the picture for a moment, a lump forming in her throat, "It's a good picture."
"Yeah."
"Toby…"
"I don't know what was said between the two of you. I know Josh and I know what a fool he can be. But there is something you need to know about him, and whatever you decide to do, that's your business."
Taken aback by Toby's tone, Donna simply nodded and said "Go ahead."
"When we got news of the bombing, and we had no idea if you were going to live or die, he was devastated. He walked around here like a ghost, Donna. He was inconsolable. And when Leo told him he could go to be with you, he didn't hesitate. Not once."
Toby watched her as he talked, knowing that whatever had happened in the past, and whatever actions she took in the future, she needed to know these things.
"And after those pictures were published in that magazine, he went to New York and got that photographer to sign an agreement never to sell them again," Donna's head flew up at the mention of Colin, "C.J. arranged for it and Josh pulled it off. I know he didn't tell you, and for the life of me, I don't know why, but I think you need to know."
Donna turned back to look at the picture on Josh's wall, remembering a time when everything had been in front of them.
"Anyway," Toby said in a low voice, turning to leave the office, "I thought you should know."
"Toby!"
"Yeah," he replied, looking at her up from underneath of his brows in a patented "Toby" look that had either melted hearts or frightened interns all over the White House.
"Thank you."
A few moments later, Ginger's voice brought Donna out of a fog of memories.
"Are you ready?" Ginger asked, walking into the office, one arm through the arm of her coat.
"Yes," Donna said, collecting herself and following the other woman through the lobby and outside, "I'm ready."
Toby watched the two young women leave and then looked back through the doorway into Josh's office to the photograph on the wall. Shaking his head, he went back into his office and slammed the door.
XXXXXX
Later that afternoon, Josh came back from Capitol Hill, wearily dropping his backpack on the floor and throwing himself into his office chair. Running his hands through his hair and then rubbing his eyes, he didn't notice Toby standing just inside of the doorway.
"Donna was here today."
"Jesus, Toby!" Josh shouted, jumping a foot out of his chair, "I've had heart surgery, you know! Shit like that can kill a person."
"You're too ornery and stupid to die anytime soon, Josh," Toby noted, hiding a small smile.
"She was here?" Josh asked, looking up at the older man.
"Yeah. She and Ginger were going out somewhere."
"How did she look?" The question was meant to be nonchalant, but Toby knew better.
"She looked good."
"Happy?"
"I guess," Toby replied, "Why don't you call her and ask her?"
Josh laughed hollowly and looked out the window, "That's not possible at the moment. I don't think she necessarily wants to talk to me."
"Do you want to talk to her?"
The younger man turned and Toby was shocked at the depth of feeling expressed in his eyes.
"Yeah."
"Like I said, you're ornery and stupid." With that, Toby nodded and left the room.
Josh looked out the window for a moment longer and then turned to his computer screen. His breath was taken away by a post-it note, written in that familiar illegible handwriting, stuck on the screen in front of him. Reaching out, he removed it and looked at it, tears forming in his eyes.
I remember that dance,
D
(To be continued.)
