A/N: Ok I have re-read my story and I have had a stroke of good luck! And decided I needed to start this chapter, before I forget (omegas please don't die of shock) the IDEA that I had all by myself! Aren't you proud of me?

Thanks for the reviews lovelies! And next chapter will most likely be review replies 

Chapter: Smiling stupidity

Ron was very busy going over the rest of "Living the Vida Loca" in his thoughts whensuddenly all thoughts (no matter how small and utterly useless) were forgotten as he slid to the ground into a lovely state of blackness

Before he fell Dumbledore heard the murmur of "Birdies with silver toothpicks…"

Now, back to the really important stuff here. ((A/N Later on Ron screamed at me, in a –cough- menacing way, or so he puts it, that his thoughts were neither small nor useless, and that excerpt (which indeed is incredibly non-important) was important and that im a horrible author for thinking such! At that point I picked up my finger and held it menacingly over the backspace key.

I loved his cry of terror.))

Harry watched in at first confusion, and then amazement, as Hermione/Harmony seemed to drift into her own world.

This was strange.

As he watched he saw the familiar roll back of her eyes he caught her upper body before she clumped to the ground.

Dumbledore was in the process of going right over to assist Harry when he tripped over Ron's stupid body ((A/N-beams at Ron-)) and fell straight forward his head colliding with the back of the Pensive. He blacked out as well.

Harry groaned. Then looking at Fawkes ((A/N: Thank you teeny-weeny for pointing out my flaw of Fawkes name : ) )) "Are you going to faint as well then? Might as well im going to have to bloody well float all these bodies to the hospital wing why not add a mythical creature in the mix?"

Fawkes, looking offended, chirped madly and promptly went up in fire.

"Grande." He glowered at the little phoenix that now rose from the ashes. "Some friend you are."

He reached down into his pocket and withdrew his wand standing up he levitated Hermione, Ron, and then Dumbledore. While walking over to collect Fawkes in his arms, he led the small procession to the hospital wing and sighed as Madam Promfy (sp?) tucked them each into a respectable bed.

"Well? What happened?"

Harry grimaced; this was going to be a long explanation.

"Well," he pointed to Ron, "He was singing the muggle song "Living the Vida Loca" When she," he pointed to Hermione "Floated a pensive over his, "He pointed to Ron, "Head. Now she, "He pointed to Hermione "Was amazed at seeing herself do such magic, since she had been well taken of her memories of magic, I suppose lost eye contact."

Harry stopped for a breath, trying to avoid her curious and rather confused gaze.

"So the pensive fell on his, " Yet again a point at Ron "Head. Then he blacked out, mumbling out birds and silver toothpicks I believe. Now then" He turned to Hermione, "This one here, after knocking out Ron On accident I might add, went into a state of shock I believe. Then her eyes rolled back and she well you know, blacked out."

Harry took a glance at Harmony/Hermione and then went on with his story.

Turning to Dumbledore he said "Now the Headmaster, was rushing over to us, since Hermione had fainted" He pointed to Hermione, stating his point, "When he tripped over his. "Point to Ron "Body, now after he fell, which I don't know why he did. He is the most amazing wizard next to Merlin, but he tripped. Since he didn't use magic quick enough to regain his balance he hit the edge of the Pensive. Which had knocked out him "Pointed to Ron, " In the first place."

Madam Pomfry stared.

And stared.

"Well?" Harry asked after a few minutes of intolerable silence, and incisive staring. How could she not blink for so long?

"So your telling me Hermione, who has been missing for the past few years, didn't know she could perform a levitation spell? And that she had lost her memory of all things magic?"

Harry massaged his temples and nodded his head dully.

"Right. Well the knots on Albus's head and Mr. Weaslys will be a pain for a while. Ms. Granger will probably wake up soon, but since she was in shock ill be giving her dreamless sleep potion. So be off with you!"

Harry opened his mouth to complain, but due to prior (and very multiple) experiences he knew it was of no use to argue with her. He turned and began to the door when her voice stopped him.

"Harry?"

He turned, "Yes?"

"What is this, 'Living the Vida Loca?'"

Harry groaned.


Harmony woke up with a jolt, how long had she been asleep?

She looked around, and realized she had no clue where she was.

"Awake are you? Well here drink this." A rather plump woman forced a cup into her hand.

Harmony stared at it. Where was Harry? Who was this woman?

Rather, a subject of more importance, Where was she?

Why was she alone?

She stared into the endless depths of the purple concoction.

"It's not poisoned dear, its actually very tasty. Chocolate Frog flavored."

"Chocolate frog!"

"Yes, now drink!"

"CHOCOLATE FROG!"

"Yes, no need to yell."

"You expect me to drink a-a-a CHOCOLATE FROG!"

"Drink it! you'll feel better" She paused, and added more quietly to herself, "And shut up."

She felt her head spin, not again, she groaned inwardly. She didn't want to black out again. Her eyes became unfocused, and then she felt the cup being forced to her lips.

Then she almost gagged on the, surprisingly scrumptious, tasting liquid, as it slid down her throat.

Within minuets all thoughts had been forgotten as she rifted in to a peaceful sleep.


Harry was at his apartment, thinking. Which was incredibly amazing, seeing as a man was actually thinking.((A/N: no offence sirs!))

His apartment has two bedrooms, both spacious. He had a bathroom that was also pretty big, and his kitchen was adequate.

Sure, there wasn't any food in the house, but that could be fixed easily.

The big question though was, Could he live with her?

She was an incisive neat freak, and too healthy for her own good. For heavens sake all she ate was practically rabbit food!

Ok so maybe chicken or fish sometimes but hey!

Plus, she didn't have junk food. A major fault if there was one at all.

They could probably strike up a bargain, and it was easier to teach her if they were closer.

Not to mention he did have the invisibility cloak and why she slept he could creep into her room at night and- whoa. Stalker thoughts, be gone now.

It would work. He wouldn't mind having his house clean. No he wouldn't mind at all.

But the cat would have to go, he couldn't stand it.

Sure he had been good friends with my godfather but hey, one can merely tolerate a creature for so long.

He had to go.

Now that everyone had been released form the Medical wing, Harry decided to tell Harmony/Hermione his plan of housing.In his pathetic mind it went as so: "Harmony? Will you live with me?" a big flourish of smiles and gasps while Harmony/Hermione answers with a high squeaky voice, "YES my dearest love!"

This was goign to be fun and easy as pie,pumpkin that is.


When he told her about it at first, it didn't goas planned...

"YOU WANT ME TO WHAT!"

(perhaps pumpkin wasnt the correct flavor, maybe red cherrys instead, to match her temper)

"Well it is pretty big, and plus im sure it would be comfortable to you and.."

"DO I LOOK LIKE A SEX KITTEN!"

"Is that a trick question, because you do have the body of a…"

His words were cut off by a yelp and a curse as a chair hit his face, "WHAT ARE YOU COME KIND OF WRESTLER!"

"DON'T RAISE YOUR VOICE TO ME!"

"I CAN BLOODY WELL SCREAM AND CURSE AND RANT AT WHOM EVER I WISH TO AT THE TIME!"

"WELL THEN GO AHEAD! BUT ITS NOT PROPER ETIQUETT!"

"WELL ESCUSE ME MISS RIGHTFULLNESS!"

:"THAT'S NOT EVEN A WORD YOU DAFT PRAT!"

Harry's eyes widened and he started to laugh.

Harmony stopped yelling and looked puzzled, "What is it?"

"You said prat." More incisive laughter ensues

Harmony rolled her eyes, "Don't be immature Potter, now I refuse to live with you."

"Why? It's a perfect way for you to recover your memory and do magic, and learn magic! It's brilliant! You'll have your own room and ill be a good boy oh mommy please can I keep you!"

During his sentence he had reverted to the voice of a small child.

"Did I not ask you to act mature?"

"Did you?"

"Yes."

"I rather think you told me to stop being immature. You neither asked or asked me to be mature."

"I believe you have serious problems."

"One being you."

"How quaint."

"Anyway will you? We could have verbal spurs as much as you want!"

"Just because every time I talk to you we end up fighting doesn't mean I enjoy it and search for them anxiously!"

"Oh, well I guess that's just me."

"Your impossible." With that he had stalked off, through a door, then one heard a loud clunk, curse and slamming open of a door.

And out walked Harmony from a closet.

"Ladies don't curse!" Harry called after her as she stalked through the correct door.

Unconsciously Harry heard himself mutter that he hoped she didn't get lost. But all well, if she did, he'd have to find her.

The second attempt at trying to get her to say yes, was much more successful.

It was in the Hogwarts library, surprisingly enough. The set is as said, Hermione sitting in a chair behind a castle of books. And Harry cautiously walking over to her.

Then she looked up and saw the tip of someone's head.

Moving a wall she peered at him. "Yes?"

"PLEASE!"

"Harry it's a library, the key word is silence."

"SAY YES AND ILL BE SILENT!"

"SHHHHHHHHHHHH!"

"SAY IT!"

"HUSH!"

"Will you to quiet it down?" The librarian said, firmly.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"GET OUT OF HERE HARRY!"

"Her-r-r-r-r-r—r-r-rmiiiiiiioooooonnnneeeeeeee!"

"THAT'S NOT MY NAME!"

"GET OUT!"

Harmony hung her head in shame and grabbed Harry's arm roughly, and half pulled/dragged him out of the library.

"WILL YOU!"

"FINE GOODNESS!"

Harry opened his mouth to scream then stopped. "Really?"

Harmony wouldn't look at him but nodded then stuttered out, "I've been reading about.. about spells and I-I want to perform some of them. I want to use this- this gift I was granted."

"YES!"

"Hush!"

"Yes mam." With that Harry grinned at her then apparated (with special permission form Dumbledore) out of Hogwarts and to Harmony's house.

Now, was time to bring up the Cat problem.

But odds weren't in Harry's favor as Hermione/Harmony caught up Crookshanks in her arms and spun him around cooing softly.

"Aren't you just the pertiest little ball of adorable fluff I've ever seen!"

He meowed in response

As Harry scowled at the creature. HE should be the one being coddled and loved, not IT. Stupid Feline.

"Ummm Harmony, im afraid there is one problem.

She looked up, "What is it?"

"The cat."

A look of stern resolute entered her eyes then.

And he melted under them as she fiercely gazed at him

"The Cat. Is not a problem. Either we both go, or neither."

"But it cant very well-"

"THE CAT GOES!"

"No need to yell Harmony…"

"Must I resort to violence?"

"You wouldn't dare"

"Wouldn't I?"

"Reverse psychology is not going to work."

"Of course not, that would entitle you to have a mind worth 'reversing'"

"….. I don't get it."

"The cat goes."

"The cat goes away."

"Either me and him, or none."

"How about letter C?"

"Which does not consist of me going without the cat."

"Actually your right. C stands for Catnapping."

"I'm sorry to inform you but catnapping is illegal in all wizarding worlds."

"You made that up."

"You weren't suppose to catch that," She faltered slightly.

Harry wore a look of pure triumph, "I did it!"

"Did what? Catnap?"

"No, I will catnap, I haven't done it in the past, I meant I outsmarted you."

"Only because your knowledge of the wizarding world, and the contents of my memory, are a tad bit wider then mine."

"Awh well atleast I had a moment of glory."

"I suppose Hermione must of outsmarted you all the time if you got all excited about that." Harmony let a smile grace her lips, though slightly unwilling to show her amusement at the whole conversation.

"Fine. The cat can come so lets just go!"

"He can?"

"I might change my mind." With that Harry turned around and stalked off in a pout, how dare she have smiled. How dare she have smiled that irresistible Hermione smile.

How dare she.

She doesn't even know her real name, but she knows how to bring a man to his knees.

Certain traits assigned to male and females were so utterly unfair. "Stupid girls."

With that said he continued down the hallway, to who knows where.

During this whole useless rant in his head, Harmony/Hermione clutched to Crookshanks with a sort of dazzled, and confused look.

'Had his eyes always been so, enchanting?' she clung closer to the oversized ginger-haired feline brushing the thought away. 'I must get to packing.'

Then she went in search of her labeling tabs.


A/N:I know it wasn't as funny as usual and im super super sorry, but I tried.

And I cant have a chapter without a verbal spar between the two completel idiots.

Ok I was more speaking of Harry then of out multi-personality disorder character, I use that as a simple tag name. She really doesn't have it.

You know what I mean; anyway next chapter will have replies to your lovely reviews! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

R/R pofavor!