AUTHOR'S NOTES: Home stretch, people, home stretch. We're working up toward the end so I can write about something else for a while.
Read/review/enjoy.
PHOTOGRAPHS (23)
Election Day was bright and cold in Washington, D.C. Josh was so excited he couldn't sleep and woke after only two hours of fitful rest on his living room sofa. Hopping up, he wandered into the kitchen and made a pot of coffee.
Just this once, he thought to himself remembering Tom Culver's warning. If I don't have caffeine today, I'm not going to make it.
Leaving the coffee to brew, he headed to the bathroom to take a shower and prepare for the day.
XXX
Matt Santos hadn't slept at all. As the night wore on into early morning and Helen tossed and turned next to him, he got up, looked in on the children and then wandered down into the living room. They were home in Texas to vote and then would fly, the entire family, back to Washington by mid-morning to be at Santos/Rafferty headquarters until the poll results were finalized.
Sitting in the living room, in his favorite leather arm chair, the one Helen hated, but kept because he loved it so, Matt thought over the events of the last year. The campaign for the Democratic spot, the whirlwind campaign against Vinnick, the months of handshaking, begging, coffee meetings, rubber chicken and pushing to get his own way. It hadn't been what he had expected. It had been harder than he had imagined.
Helen came downstairs as morning was breaking through the windows and found Matt in his old leather chair. He was quietly studying a spot on the wall and she knew that he had neither slept nor moved in several hours.
Rather than disturbing him, she padded softly into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. It would be a long day ahead of them and they needed all the help they could get.
XXX
The automatic timer on her coffee machine kicked in around 5:30 a.m. and Donna awoke to the wonderful smell of brewed coffee when her alarm went off at quarter of six. Crawling out of bed and sliding her feet into a pair of slippers, for a moment she was confused. It had been several months since she had been in her Washington apartment and getting her bearings again after so many nights on the road would take some time. A registered voter in the District, Donna had flown back from Seattle the day before to vote and then meet with the other staffers at headquarters to monitor the exit polls.
Pouring herself a cup of coffee, Donna leaned back against the counter and inhaled the aroma. She had lived on coffee for the past year, learning that beggars couldn't be choosers and that the brew out of the pot in a backwoods gas station was nearly as good as the best Starbucks could offer when you needed it bad enough. Taking the cup with her, she slowly walked out into her living room, gathering her strength for the day ahead.
As she walked by her bookshelf she noticed the picture from the second Bartlet Inauguration. She wasn't sure why she had kept it out all this time. She simply knew she couldn't bear to put it away, yet. She was almost there, almost. She knew she could now talk to Josh, on the phone, without feeling like her heart was in her throat. She knew she could watch him on television without feeling quite so overwhelmed by feelings she'd rather bury far beneath the surface. She just wasn't sure she could see him and she wasn't certain she could exorcise him completely from her life.
Soon, she though. Just not quite yet.
Sighing, Donna wandered into the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for her day.
XXX
"Abigail," the President said firmly as Abby emerged from the bathroom at the Manchester farm. "We're going to be late."
Looking at her husband, Abby rolled her eyes and wandered back to finish her makeup, "Keep your pants on Jethro. It's not as if they won't part the sea for us when we get to the voting booth."
Jed was getting dressed while keeping one eye on CNN and the other on the Washington Post. His wife's teasing did nothing to ease the nervousness he felt this day. While he had run for this office twice, and won, he didn't think he had ever felt quite as nervous about the results as he did today.
"You want some coffee, Abby?" he asked, studying the talking heads on the television.
"I probably shouldn't, and I know you shouldn't, but yes, I will. It's going to be a long day," came the response from the bathroom.
Jed poured his wife a cup of coffee and, grabbing his cane, he carried it into the bathroom to her. When he got there, he stood in the doorway and studied his wife. Eight years in the public spotlight and many tragedies, both personal and professional, had done nothing to dampen her beauty. He knew his hair had grayed, his eyes clouded, and his gait certainly slowed, in the last several years but he could see no change in his wife.
"You're beautiful," he said softly, meeting her eyes in the mirror. "I don't think I say that enough."
Smiling and fastening her earring, she turned around and faced him. In her eyes, she could see the age, but in her heart, she only saw the young man she married so many years ago.
"Give me my coffee, Romeo. We have to go vote."
XXX
CJ wandered into the West Wing at daybreak on Election Day, vowing to go vote as soon as she caught up with everything on her desk. She was taking the opportunity of the President's short absence (he and the First Lady would be returning to Washington as soon as they cast their votes in New Hampshire) to review a few things that kept getting placed on the back burner when he was in the office.
As she tossed her coat onto the rack in the corner of her office, she wandered over to her desk, flicked on the television (CNN, of course) and fed Gail. Staring down into the fishbowl, she momentarily thought of Danny Concannon and wondered where he was at that moment.
Probably traipsing around the world pestering other world leaders, she thought.
Dusting her hands on her skirt, she turned and walked out of her office for her morning tour through the bullpen. It was early enough that a skeleton staff was the only thing moving. Today would be chaotic as people came and went to vote and handle last minute items. She fully expected this and prayed no national or international emergency would arise that required their undivided attention.
As she walked by Toby's office, she could see that the lights were off and the door was closed. That was normally a sign that he had fallen asleep on the couch and Annabeth had tucked him in, for lack of a better phrase. Taking a breath, CJ turned the handle on the door and walked into the office.
Inside, on the sofa, Toby was sleeping, his feet hanging off the edge and poking out from underneath of the afghan that had been spread over him. The television was on, with the volume turned down low, and the blinds had been drawn to shield him from the morning sun.
Annabeth certainly looks out for him, CJ thought, shocked at the sudden jolt of jealousy that went through her.
Walking over, CJ opened the blinds and let in the weak morning sun. Turning, she saw Toby rub his eyes and slowly sit up.
He's like a dog. Wakes at the smallest sound...
"What time is it?" he mumbled, rubbing his hands over his head and stretching.
"Early," she replied, turning up the volume on the television. "I don't think I need to ask this, but have you been here all night?"
Blinking, Toby looked up at her, "Yeah."
"Then go home, take a shower and get something to eat," she said, smiling, knowing that otherwise, he would wander the halls and wreak havoc all morning.
"What's the news?"
Laughing, she said, "There is no news yet, Toby. The polls just opened. Now go home, get yourself together and get back here. That's an order."
Walking out the door, she heard his voice behind her. She stopped and turned around.
"What did you say?"
Clearing his throat, Toby looked up from underneath of his brow, in a way that was unequivocally his and said, "He's going to win."
CJ studied the man in front of her for a moment and then turned to continue on to her office.
XXX
Santos/Rafferty headquarters was chaotic at around 9:00 when Donna finally made it in after voting. Televisions were blaring, shoved into every conceivable free space, people were both frantic and zombie-like as they realized it was Game Day and there were no last minute rabbits that could be pulled out of the hat.
Donna wandered over to a desk in the corner that looked unoccupied, threw down her bag and coat and picked up the phone. It would be 6:00 a.m. in Seattle, but she was sure the staff out there was ready to go. On voting day, they were organizing to be outside the polls (beyond the requisite number of feet required by Federal law) and once she had checked in with the West Coast, she would work her way east.
Josh blew through the door at 9:16 looking weary, but excited. He spent the morning bouncing up and down on the balls of his feet, yelling (to no one in particular) and making call after call. The Congressman and his wife came through the door early in the afternoon and Josh, Rhonna and some of the "old" staffers disappeared behind the conference room door with them.
For once, Donna felt left out of the game. Even when she was working in the White House, Josh had kept her "in the loop" and today was the first time that she was really playing on their terms. She was part of the team, but not one of the big players and it served to confirm to her several of the feelings she had been trying to work through as Election Day approached.
XXX
As time slid by and afternoon rode into evening and evening turned into night, the campaign staff crowded around the televisions watching the coverage. CNN, Fox, MSNBC, nothing was missed or considered to inconsequential to be viewed on a TV somewhere in that building.
Josh paced back and forth calling out for an update every so often. Certain staffers had moved to a local hotel ballroom where the victory (or concession) speech would be given once the polls had closed. He noted that Donna sat in the corner still, calling out to Seattle, Chicago, Detroit and the other big mid-western and northwestern cities to get updates on their situations. He had been watching her out of the corner of his eye all day, but had yet to go speak to her.
At one point, someone had food brought in and the hungry, weary staff sat down to eat, eyes still glued to the television coverage. Josh took the opportunity to go grab another cup of coffee and have a moment to himself. As he walked into the conference room, he heard a voice beside him.
"Isn't that against doctor's orders?"
Josh whipped his head around and saw Helen Santos standing a few feet away. The two had never been friends – hell, they had barely been allies – but Josh could see the compassion in her eyes.
"Mrs. Santos..."
"Matt told me, Josh. My husband is very bad at keeping secrets from me," she said softly, taking a few steps closer so their voices wouldn't carry. "How are you doing?"
Exhaling and looking down into his coffee cup, Josh said slowly, "I'm hanging in."
Helen nodded, knowing the man who had spent months completely wrapped up in the campaign wouldn't give away a small part of himself even now.
Turning to leave, Helen stopped and said softly, "He wanted you in the White House with him, Josh. He understands, believe me, but if you could have gone, he'd take you there. You know that, right?"
Staring at the wall and working his jaw muscles, Josh nodded. He knew. He knew what he was giving up and knew what lay in front of him. It was a painful knowledge, but one he was learning, slowly, to understand.
XXX
Jed and Abby had invited some of the senior staff into the residence to watch the election results. It was the first time in years that many of them weren't involved in a campaign and didn't have a vested personal interest (in terms of future employment in this very building) in the outcome.
Lounging around the living room, Jed looked out over the people who had walked with him up the mountain and down through the valley. Some were recent to the journey, some had been there from the beginning. Before it was all over, he would tell them, each and every one, what they meant to him, what their sacrifices had meant to them. But he wouldn't do it tonight.
"Hello, Jethro," Abby said, smiling as she put her arm around his waist. "You're awfully quiet tonight."
Smiling at his wife, Jed said simply, "Just thinking, my dear. Just thinking."
"Well, think over here with your friends, not off in the corner," Abby grabbed his hand and pulled him over toward CJ and Toby.
Nodding, Jed walked over and sat down in a free chair, ready to jump in on whatever argument was progressing in his living room.
XXX
The polls were closed and results were pouring in from across the east coast. They would be coming in now in waves as night fell from one coast to the other and staffers were on the phones getting results from as many states as possible.
Television pundits talked about red and blue states, flashed maps and pie charts, and droned on about weather related voting and age blocks. On a large white board in the "war room" they had each state listed and as the polls closed and the results were called there would be written a blue or red check next to the state name. As of right now, red and blue were somewhat even and that fact did nothing to dispel stress that was brewing under the surface.
Donna stayed on the phone all day and when the polls finally closed in the northwestern states, she walked up to Josh and gave him the results. As blue checkmarks were placed on the board, a wide smile broke out across his face. Running over to a television tuned to CNN, he waited to hear the official results. He didn't have to wait long.
Sometime between utter exhaustion and absolute fear, the Santos/Rafferty staff saw the newscasters call the election in their favor.
And then, there was absolute chaos.
XXX
Josh, Bram and Rhonna traveled with Matt, Helen and the kids to the hotel ballroom. The obvious presence of the Secret Service didn't phase Josh but seemed to strike awe into the rest of the group. The remaining staff was left to filter over to the ballroom as soon as possible.
When the group walked into the ballroom, the room erupted in noise. Matt and Helen, each with a child in tow, slowly made their way toward the stage to make the acceptance speech. Josh held back, knowing his work was now done, and observed the moment for what it was – a moment of all out celebration.
Standing with his back to the door, he felt someone walk up behind him. Twisting around, he saw Donna, flushed from the cold, standing a few feet away.
"Hey," he mouthed over the noise.
"Hey," she replied, giving a small wave.
Josh was perplexed. She should be happy, he thought. But somehow he got the feeling of a wall having been built up around her. Not just with respect to him, but everyone, and the fact that she would have done so saddened him.
At that moment, Matt Santos held up his hand to quiet the crowd. He thanked them all for their hours of hard work and sacrifice. He thanked Arnold Vinnick for his fair fight. He went through a litany of thanks and then told them that their work wasn't done.
As the President-Elect continued with his speech, Josh turned to Donna, but she had vanished. Puzzled, Josh walked out the door of the ballroom to look for her, but she was gone. Turning back to the celebration behind him and the man on the stage, Josh realized that his work there was done. He had vowed to stay through the election and he had done so.
Grabbing his coat, Josh turned and walked out of the hotel to catch a cab.
XXX
When he reached her apartment, he paid the cabbie and watched the taxi disappear down the street. Josh was unsure of what he wanted to say or what, exactly he was going to do, but the look in her eyes had disturbed him and he wanted to know she was okay.
Looking up at her apartment, he noted that the windows were dark. He had long since returned his key and knew that he couldn't simply go up there. As he studied the windows, he noted the soft light coming from the living room. When Donna went to bed, she always left the light on above the kitchen sink. He had teased her about this for years, but she still did it no matter where she was living. It was that light Josh now saw from the living room window.
She's asleep, he thought. Why would she come home and go to bed? Tonight of all nights?
He stood, wavering in the middle of the street, looking up at her window. Part of him wanted to rush over, push the buzzer for her apartment and force her to let him in. The other part, the rational part, told him that she wanted nothing to do with him and he was wasting everyone's time. Standing in the cold for fifteen minutes, Josh listened to the debate between the two voices.
Glancing up one last time at her bedroom window, he turned and walked down to the corner where he could catch a taxi home.
XXX
Donna stood in the shadows of her bedroom watching Josh out in the street. She had turned off her cell phone prior to putting on her pajamas, wanting to turn off the world around her.
She knew she was depressed, knew she was angry, and knew that if she let him up here, the damage done could never be repaired.
Do you want to repair it? said the small voice in the back of her head. Isn't this what you wanted?
Shaking her head sadly, Donna had to admit she didn't know what she wanted. She knew she wanted out of Washington, but she didn't know where she would go or what she would do. She wanted away from here, from the reminders of the past. She wanted away from everyday symbols of things that could no longer be.
Silently, she watched as Josh looked up to the window one last time and turned and walked away. She fought the urge to run down to the front stoop and yell after him. Sighing heavily, she turned and crawled into bed, hoping that a good night's sleep would take away the overwhelming feeling of sadness she carried with her.
Out in the living room, the bookshelf was bare. The photograph from the Inaugural Ball had been packed away.
(To be continued.)
