AUTHOR'S NOTES: This one is for slimwhistler. My thoughts are with you, my friend. May the Goddess touch you and bring you comfort.

One more chapter after this one. Again, this is a transitional chapter. Don't expect much but to go from A to B.

PHOTOGRAPHS (24)

The day after the election, Donna approached the President-Elect with the proposal she travel back out to Seattle and work on shutting down their state headquarters one state at a time, working her way back east. She argued that she knew the staff in the major cities, knew the set up and would be a good candidate. Plus, she laughed, she wanted more frequent flyer miles.

In truth, she didn't want to be in Washington. Plain and simple. And until she found out where she needed to be, going back out west was the easiest solution.

Matt Santos didn't know what was going on with the blonde, but respected her wishes and realized she was right – there was no one better suited to the job than. Nodding, he watched her let out a sigh of relief and when she left the office, he felt an air of sadness go with her.

As Donna was leaving headquarters, she met up with Josh coming in through the front door. Smiling slightly at his disheveled appearance, she stood aside to let him walk in.

"Hey," he said, "Where are you going in such a hurry?"

"Back out to Seattle," she replied, not looking in his eyes. Not wanting to see the hurt there. "I'm closing up shop out there."

"You're leaving again?" he said softly, leaning down and trying to catch her eyes.

Lifting her head, she looked at him and then out the glass front door. "Yeah."

"How long will you be gone?" The tone in his voice was unmistakable and Donna couldn't bring herself to look at him.

"A month or so."

"Donna, can we..."

"I'm sorry, Josh. I have to go home and pack. I want to see if I can get out to Seattle tonight." She put her hand on the door handle.

"Donna," he said quietly into her ear, "We have to talk."

Summoning all of her strength, she turned to him, looked him in the eye and stood for a moment. Turning, she pushed on the front door and stepped out into the November morning.

XXX

Walking down the street, she felt the tears well up in her eyes.

He wouldn't understand. He's always been the winner. Even now, he's still the winner.

She had tried so hard to break away from him, to take the step away that would prove to her inner demons that she didn't need a man to make her decisions and define her life. And what happened? The job she picked was doomed from the start, she lost, and ended right back where she had been.

Since the night of the Democratic convention, when Matt Santos and Ricki Rafferty stood together on the stage and Bob Russell slunk back to Washington, Donna felt she had failed. Failed at her one chance of independence, failed at her one try to establish herself. When Matt Santos offered her the position, she couldn't help but ask herself if it had been at Josh's suggestion and it angered her that once again, she was being saved from herself. She wasn't mad at Josh, or the Congressman, or even Will. She was mad at herself.

Donna hoped that the next month or so on the road would help her come up with the answers she so desperately needed. She knew she couldn't go back to Washington, but she didn't know quite where she would go.

XXX

Toby wandered into CJ's office a week after the election and planted himself in a chair.

Looking up over her glasses, CJ drew out the word, "Yes?"

Studying his tie, Toby said slowly, "What would you say if I said I was going to be a teacher?"

CJ took off her glasses and sat back in her chair, "What?"

Toby looked up and clasped his hands in his lap. "New York University. I'm going to be starting there in June for their summer session."

Jumping out of her chair, CJ ran over to hug him, "That's wonderful, Toby!"

Smiling, Toby returned the hug. "Yeah, I can commute down to see the twins and can bring them back to the city once they are a little older."

CJ leaned back against the desk and smiled, "Wow. You're going to teach, Josh will be behind my desk..."

Toby cleared his throat uncomfortably. It had taken all of his willpower not to tell CJ about the episode at the farm, but Josh was a friend and they had all given their word that night. But, he rationalized, the election is over...

Standing up, Toby walked over to the office door and closed it. Turning around, he faced CJ and said, "Josh isn't coming to the White House with Matt Santos."

CJ shook her head, as if to clear it, and said, "What?"

Toby looked at his shoes, "He's not coming with Santos."

Trying to catch Toby's eye, CJ was incredulous, "Why the hell not?"

"Sit down," Toby said quietly, gesturing to the sofa.

"No, I will not sit down," CJ said obstinately. "What the hell is going on, Toby?"

"CJ, sit down," Toby replied firmly. The two stood face to face for a moment until CJ blinked and sat down on the sofa.

"I'm telling you this now because the election is over and Josh made us promise."

"Us?" she questioned.

Sighing, he said softly, "Me, Leo, the President and the First Lady."

"Toby..."

"He collapsed, CJ," Toby said, meeting her eye. "That weekend we were in Manchester in October. He collapsed at the farm."

CJ sat in total stillness.

"The First Lady made arrangements for him to see a cardiologist in Boston the next day. They think he has coronary artery disease. He needs to leave all 'this'," he said gesturing with his hand, "or he's likely to have a massive heart attack."

Covering her mouth with her hand, CJ stood and walked over to the window. She crossed her arms across her chest and stood silently.

"If he takes care of himself..." Toby started.

"Oh, for God's sake, Toby, this is Josh we're talking about," CJ said from the window.

Toby smiled and said softly, "Yeah."

The room was silent for a moment.

"What else did the doctors say?" CJ said, her voice sounding far away in her own ears.

"Nothing, really. Josh refused to come in for any tests until the election was over."

CJ whirled around, "And you let him? You all just said, 'Okay, your heart is a ticking time-bomb, but go ahead and go back to the job that will kill you?' Jesus, Toby!"

Toby stood and walked over to her. "CJ, it's Josh. He wouldn't let us do anything. He wanted to get Santos through the election."

Putting her hand up to her forehead, CJ suddenly felt very old. The events of the last eight years whirled past her – Rosslyn, the MS Investigations, Simon's death, Zoey's kidnapping, Gaza, everything.

"CJ?" Toby said, worried about the pale shade of her face.

Smiling wanly, she turned toward him, "I'm okay. Just a little overwhelmed with everything, I think."

Walking over to her desk, she sat down. "Has anyone told Donna?"

Toby looked down at his feet again. "No. Josh was pretty emphatic about her not knowing."

Shaking her head, CJ said softly, "What are we going to do with them?"

Toby studied her for a moment and said, "I don't know. I don't know if anything can be done. Sometimes you get so far away from where you should be..."

The two locked eyes. The things left unsaid between them were just beneath the surface. Visible, but not touchable without a great deal of effort.

CJ broke away first.

"Anything else?"

Lifting his head slightly, Toby said, "No."

Returning to the work in front of her, CJ didn't look up until the she heard the door close. Putting her head down on her hands, she started to cry.

XXX

"So," Matt said, leaning back in his chair.

"So," Josh laughed, putting his hands in his pockets and leaning up against the wall.

They had agreed to use their Washington headquarters for planning purposes until the Inauguration. Matt felt awkward using his Congressional office for such purposes and Josh agreed that it wouldn't hurt to have a separate base of operations until January.

"I need a cabinet. And a staff," Matt said simply, looking down at the blank notepad in front of him.

"I've been thinking about that," Josh said starting to pace. "You need a chief of staff. And they need to come in right now and get you started."

"Josh..."

"I can't, sir. You know that."

The two had had this discussion over and over. But the fact of the matter was that Josh would be leaving Washington in two months to begin teaching at Harvard. He had made the deal shortly after the diagnosis from Dr. Culver and had informed the Congressman of his decision.

"It doesn't hurt to ask," Matt said smiling. He knew that Josh wouldn't stay in Washington, but the idea of losing the man who brought him this far was terrifying.

"I think you need to talk to Cliff Cauley," Josh said quietly. "He's experienced, he's been in the job for a while..."

"He's a Republican," Matt added, "I don't want him as my Chief of Staff. I know what he did with the stem-cell vote, but I don't..."

Josh sat down and looked at Matt, "He'd be good. He's loyal and he's wiling to go out of his way. It would be a good faith gesture to the Republicans – a trade for another eight years of a Democratic president. Plus, he saved me once."

Matt studied Josh and wondered what stories there were in the background of these people that he would never know.

"He saved you?"

Smiling, Josh said softly, "Yeah. He's a good guy."

Thinking for a moment, Matt studied Josh and saw that he was complete serious.

This guy must be good if Josh is willing to recommend a Republican to be my CoS.

"Ok," Matt said leaning back in his chair, "Say I take Cliff Cauley as my Chief of Staff. Who is his deputy?"

Josh broke out into a wide grin and said, "Remember Joey Lucas?"

(To be continued.)