One – Morning Slog

Breakfast at the Ninja House, as Naruto has called it, is a pretty normal affair.

I'm always the first one up, so I plug in the electric appliances. Why are they unplugged? Who knows. Probably Naruto's really out-of-it training. Or Sakura protecting Naruto from himself.

I plug in the toaster today, then move onto the coffeepot. As I plug that in, I realize that I don't drink coffee. None of us do.

I unplug the coffeepot, seeing as there's no use for it. I look around for anything else I was supposed to plug in. Doesn't appear to be anything.

I go into my room and shut the paper doors. As soon as I get in, I pick up a book and start to read. Since Sakura and Naruto never wake up early, this occupies me for a while.

Three hours later, I hear a hairdryer. Sakura's up. A few seconds later, someone begins to bang on the bathroom door. That's Naruto. I walk out of my room.

I sigh and pull some bowls out of the kitchen cabinet. I lay three of them, side by side, on the tabletop, and pull out some cereal for myself. I pour it into one of the bowls and walk over to the fridge.

"Sakura! Hurry up!"

"I'm drying my hair!"

"Do that later! I need to piss!"

"NARUTO!"

"But I need to!"

"Use the bathroom by the living room!"

"…There's a bathroom by the living room?"

I pull a carton of milk out and slosh it into my cereal. I put the milk back into the cold box also known as a refrigerator.

I see something running to the bathroom out of the corner of my eye. It must be Naruto, I reason, as I close the fridge door.

I open a drawer by the fridge and pull out a shiny spoon. Turning on the faucet, I wash off the spoon, just to be careful – you never know with Naruto… or Sakura, for that matter…

I walk over to the table and begin to eat my multi-colored breakfast, amidst Naruto and Sakura's banter. It's more Sakura and Naruto screaming at each other… seeing that they were still at opposite ends of the house.

"What's this tube thing in the paper wrapper?"

"NARUTO! PUT THAT DOWN!"

"But what is it?"

Crunch. The cereal hasn't expired.

"None of your business!"

"Sakura, should I open it?"

"No! Don't open it --!"

I hear a rip noise.

"…Now what is it?"

I hear Sakura bang the door to her bathroom open, stomp across the hall, and slam her fist on Naruto's bathroom door.

"Naruto… give me it… open this door…!"

Naruto must have obliged, because I hear a click. Then… screams.

I drop my spoon on the table, and proceed to drink the milk out of my bowl.

"Naruto, never touch this stuff… my stuff… again!"

"Ow…! Ow! Okay…! Stop hitting me, Sakura…!"

I drop my bowl and spoon into the sink and turn on the faucet, letting it soak in the warm, soapy water. Taking a washcloth, I scrub out the bowl.

Naruto dashes into the room, grabs one of the two remaining bowls, and dumps of truckload of cereal into it.

How wasteful.

I turn off the faucet and place the bowl into a drying rack. I have time before Kakashi-sensei told us to meet him for training. True, he always shows up late, but I like to be punctual.

Sakura stops me before I reach the bathroom by the living room. "Hi, Sasuke… did you sleep well?"

I remain expressionless. "I guess I did. But why do you care?"

Sakura looks crushed. I think I may have missed the point, but, unperturbed, I walk to the bathroom and close the door.

After that, I try to relax as I brush my teeth, but Sakura and Naruto are at it again. Oh well.

A/N: I know I said that this fiction was going to be deleted. Well… I lied. I did the next few chapters in an odd manner, so bear with me, because next up is laundry, groceries, and – horror of unspeakable horror – television!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Naruto. I wished I owned the house they live in…