PART FIFTEEN
"ok then Paul bye see you in a couple of days"
"so what did he say?" Archie asked, as Duncan put the phone down.
Duncan so delighted and excited by Archie and Lexie's offer to come and work for them in Banbridge helping with the business and around the house, he had decided to tell Paul as soon as possible. Archie and Lexie insisted he wait at least 24 hours, to make sure he was happy with his decision.
"well at first he was quite taken aback but when he realised how serious I was"
"and excited" Lexie said butting in
"yeah that too" Duncan continued "anyway he was fine, I agreed to go back and work for another couple of weeks just to tidy up a few loose ends and then I'm all yours. Whilst I'm back I'll discuss with Golly and Paul the practicalities of Glenbogle supplying you with fish and game as required for the business as well."
"ah Dunc that's great" said Lexie giving him a hug "it will be lovely to have you around, now I need to go and glam myself up for my evening out with my lovely husband" Lexie continued, smiling at Archie.
As Lexie left the room, Archie turned to Duncan "Lexie's right Dunc, it will be good to have you around the place. Oh and you won't forget the hens and to lock up tonight will you as you enjoy and loose yourself in the company of the lovely Lucy?" he said teasingly
"No Arch I shall take my responsibilities seriously, and Archie thanks for this opportunity..... to work for you I mean.......not to shut up the hens tonight."
"no problem Dunc" said Archie slapping him on the back as he headed off to get changed.
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"Oh Lex" Archie said "you look so beautiful" she smiled as he walked towards her, she was wearing a pale blue dress that although appearing floaty hugged her figure and her hair was swept back with a few tendrils hanging around her face. He pulled her towards him as he ran his hands up the fabric of the dress, sending a tingle of response through her body, then he held her face in his hands and kissed her.
"You know Arch you're looking pretty hot yourself" Lexie murmured as she ran her hands down his back and up under the jacket of his suit, lightly scratching his back through the cotton of his shirt. Murmuring in response he kissed her again, "mmm if we're not careful we won't get out and as it is I'm going to have to go and reapply my lipstick" Lexie sighed. Archie kissed her again and reluctantly let her go.
As Lexie went into the en suite to check her make up, he quickly stashed a few more items into the over night bag he was hiding under the bed.
"Ready then?" he asked as she came back into the room "yes lets go"
"Bye Dunc" they called out as they left, Duncan came out of the kitchen "have fun, you sure you don't want me to drive you there so you can both have a drink?"
"thanks Dunc, but its fine" Archie replied
"and Dunc don't do anything I wouldn't do" Lexie called out to him teasingly
As they went outside to get in the car, Archie turned and said "I've left my wallet upstairs, you jump into the car Lex, I'll just go and grab it" on the pretext of getting his wallet, he dashed upstairs to grab the overnight bag.
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They arrived at the hotel which was really a small country house, set down in a valley by a small river.
"oh Archie
its beautiful how on earth did you find it?"
"well the restaurant is in the coveted list of top restaurants in the UK"
Lexie turned and smiled, as Archie parked the car. As they got out he grabbed the overnight bag he had surreptitiously placed on the back seat
Lexie looked at him with a puzzled expression on her face "um Arch what's with the bag"
he grinned at her and placed an arm round her waist "my surprise"
"go on"
"well I've booked us a room for the night, you've been working so hard, and I just thought we should just relax and enjoy some time out together, I wanted to show you I love you and appreciate you"
"oh Arch that is so lovely" Lexie said as she placed a hand on his cheek and kissed him.
They went inside and checked in, then walked into the restaurant. It was small but beautiful, a log fire blazed in the grate. Some of walls were stone and others painted a very pale cream, a dividing wall gave the suggestion of two small dining rooms, and french doors led out onto a veranda.
"This is gorgeous and perfect for a cosy evening with my lovely husband" Lexie said squeezing Archie's hand.
"my thoughts exactly" Archie replied.
They settled back and ordered their food
"its going to be great having Duncan on board to help out with odd jobs and the business, there is no one quite like him he is unique" Archie laughed
"you're not wrong there, I am so glad we are able to help him, I feel a little guilty I missed what was happening to him, I was so caught up with the estate, you not being there all the pain and then of course thinking I.........." Lexie stopped realising she had said too much
Archie looked at Lexie's face she had paled and had a worried and pained look in her eyes
"Lex what is it?" he asked, Lexie hesitated, then reached over and took hold of his hand and held it tightly
"Arch I have something to tell you, I should have told you before, but I kept putting it off I guess I didn't want to taint our happiness" he could see the tears welling up in her eyes "please just listen and hear me out"
"ok" he replied not taking his eyes off her face
Archie felt a twist in his stomach wondering what on earth she was going to tell him. Lexie took a deep breath and began
"It was about three weeks after you left for Nepal I thought I was pregnant. I told no one I was so scared, I was missing you so much, it was horrible, it hurt so much," she paused to catch her breath "I couldn't cope, I suppose I sort of went into denial. Anyway eventually I went to see Dr Brown in the village, it turned out I wasn't pregnant, but my body had gone into a kind of physical shut down as a result of the emotional stress and my periods just stopped temporarily."
Lexie paused again to take a sip of water, as she looked up after putting the glass down her eyes met Archie's, she registered the shock and the hurt in his face, and as if in response a tear slid down her cheek as she reawakened all the pain she had felt at the time
"oh Lex why didn't you tell me?" he asked her feeling helpless and inadequate in the face of what she was telling him, as he reached to brush the tear away on her cheek
"Archie what would have been the point, there was nothing you could have done, I had to cope, and those weekly phone calls with you were so precious I wanted, needed maybe, to keep them light and chatty, I didn't want to spoil those few moments. Anyway once things had settled down, I had a chance to think and reflect, especially about my fear of pregnancy and having children. In a way perhaps it was a wake up call, making me face my fears and see what I was depriving myself of" she began to smile "oh Archie don't look so upset, this is the good bit"
"but Lexie I....just don't know what to say, to think, to feel, I made you feel that pain, that hurt, how could I do that to you, the one person I love more than anything in the world, I abandoned you when you needed me most, how can you ever forgive me?"
Lexie reached out and brushed her hand down the side of his face "Arch there is nothing to forgive, it happened, its past, its over, we've got to move forward which is what I was about to tell you about. "
Archie interrupted her "but Lex it can't be as simple as that, you've had time to think, I haven't its all new to me, I don't know its..."
"Archie you left you went to Nepal, you did what you had to do and I think I can understand why. I was left behind, I did what I had to do, it was a difficult situation but I had to cope, I've done it before in my life. I trusted you, trusted that you would return to me, you did. I'm just telling you more about what happened to me whilst you were away. You can't change what happened, but you need to know so we can move forward. I hold no grudge against you, I love you implicitly, but I would have been holding out on you, if I hadn't told you what happened, and now I want to forget and move forward which is where I was about up to"
"but Lex I should never have gone, how could I have left you for such selfish reasons, you said at the time I was putting everyone else before us, you were right, if I hadn't left you would never have suffered such pain, I...."
"Archie no don't you see, if you hadn't left, if Paul hadn't turned up we would never be here living our life just us in Banbridge." Archie nodded in agreement, "so you see sometimes you have to go through pain and emotional turmoil to come out into the bright light at the other end. Ok answer me these questions, are you happy?"
"yes of course but.."
"no buts allowed, isn't it wonderful here, don't you get the feeling that Occasions and Celebrations is going to be a success, isn't it exciting"
"yes" he said beginning to smile
"would we have ever ended up here if you hadn't gone away, where life is about us and not a tribe of people and the whole of Glenbogle and isn't there something wonderfully indulgent and pleasurable about that?"
"yes, yes Lex you are right, but it still doesn't excuse the pain and the hurt I caused you"
"no but in time you will have opportunity to make up for that and this surprise this evening is just wonderful, now can I continue with the good bit?"
"Yes"
"ok so I was talking about facing up to my fears and concerns, well my irrational fears and concerns really! I realised I want children sooner rather than later and with you there every step of the way, sharing the whole pregnancy experience with me. I was able to see that with you with me, anything is possible, I can do it, I can cope and with parenthood. But I need you Archie to help me, support me, to tell me I still look sexy when I feel like a beached whale, everything!"
Archie smiled, lent across the table and kissed her "you even have to ask, you will always look gorgeous, beautiful, sexy and delectable to me! Seriously Lex there is nothing I want more than to share everything with you. I can't begin to comprehend how you felt after I left, if I could I would do anything to rid you of that pain and hurt but I can't, but I will promise you this I will never do to our children what your father did, I won't leave again Lex ever."
The waiter who had been hovering sensing the time was not right to interrupt, placed their starters on the table in front of them.
"I know you'll be a wonderful mother" Archie assured her, she smiled at him "and Lex we'll get books, we'll get thermometers"
"thermometers?"
"you know to take your temperature"
Lexie burst our laughing "and are you going to make a wee chart to record my temperature as well?"
Archie smiled "perhaps, just think all that fun practising as well when your temperature isn't right!"
"practising what are you implying, wouldn't perfecting be better description?" she said jokingly
"yes but can you perfect perfection" he said, Lexie glanced up at him about to tease him about making such a cheesy comment, when she saw the look of utter desire and love in his face, an expression that spoke volumes. It made her whole body react even her breathing. There was a silence across the table filled with tangible electricity, Lexie broke it, knowing there was one final explanation she had to give to Archie.
"Archie there is something else I need to tell you. If I'm honest I'd been bottling up and burying my feelings about what happened whilst you were away. Although they would begin to re-surface and pop up each time we mentioned children and also being around Emily. Anyway, you know all my concerns about children stem from my Mum and what happened when I was younger. The thing is, all this has come to the forefront of my mind because of Dan in the pub" Archie tried to interrupt her but she carried on "he is treating me just like that boyfriend's of Mums did and the funny thing is, he even looks a little like him. I hate it most people would be able to shrug it off, give him a put down, but I find it so hard for some reason. I'm beginning to dread going to the pub, he makes my skin crawl and the thought of being involved with him on a business level just makes me feel sick."
"I know" said Archie taking hold of her hand "I was waiting for you to say something to me. He can't hurt you, you're in a different time and place now. He'll get the message soon and tire of what he is doing, he can see he is getting no where"
"but Arch for some men that is more of a challenge and I'm a married woman as well, and the other thing is on Saturday Margaret Mason made some comment about Dan's reputation and the fact I had better watch out"
"Lex you can get through this, laugh it off, give him a real put down, he'll get the message and you will be well on the way to being rid of your demons, you'll come out on top. I don't disbelieve you, I'm not your mother, I'm with you holding your hand metaphorically and physically, together we'll sort it out. I don't want to get into a confrontational situation with him, I will if I need to but I believe you can do this yourself, and it is important that you do. As for the business, we'll simply tell him we want to wait until we are up and running and established before we start to consider the option with the pub. As for Margaret she is so you say Jill said the village gossip, ignore her, she's not worth it and anyway if Dan is Margaret's cousin people will take whatever she says with a pinch of salt, family feuds and all that"
"Thanks Arch you're right" said Lexie smiling as she toyed with the food on her plate "I guess I just need to believe in myself a little more"
"You do, you are an incredibly strong and resilient woman, I just don't think you can always see it yourself, but maybe with a little help and encouragement from me you will."
Lexie looked up and smiled at him, picked up her wine glass and said "the future", Archie joined her in the toast, and added "to us and to becoming a family of more than two."
The food and the wine were exquisite and they spent the rest of the evening chatting about the future, parenthood, Banbridge and Glenbogle. As they finished Archie sat back and smiled lazily at Lexie "happy?" he asked her, as she began to slide the last chocolate into her mouth, "mm these chocolates are wonderful!" she replied, Archie laughed "I'll take that as a yes then, so Mrs Macdonald now that you have finished devouring those chocolates would you care to accompany me upstairs?" he asked taking hold of her hand.
"with pleasure" Lexie replied smiling.
