Disclaimer: They're not mine and they never will be :-(

Disclaimer: Everything you recognise belongs to J.K. Rowling. I own nothing, and am making no profit.

Setting: This story starts a couple of weeks after the end of GoF, but after that goes a little AU.

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Chapter 18: The Room of Requirement

The Room of Requirement had transformed itself into the usual cosy bedroom. Candlelight flickered from sconces, a rosy little fire burned away in the hearth and cross-legged on the thick red carpet were James and Lily. Their knees were pressed together, toes just touching, and James, not for the first time, thought how adorable it was that she liked to feel the carpet on her bare feet. The thought was fleeting, a brief distraction from his sad reality.

She reached across his lap and grasped his hand in a comforting gesture. He stared at it.

"You don't have to tell me," she said. "I'd like you to. I'm here to listen, but you don't have to tell me. I'm just here for you, alright?"

She was trying to be considerate but her words only brought on a new wave of tears to be fought back. James found himself fixating on the feeling of her hand in his as he tried to pull himself together. In that moment it seemed terribly important that he speak without sobbing.

"H-Harry," he floundered, speaking a little too soon. "Y-you know, my cousin?" She nodded. "He ran off, and I … I don't know where he is." He winced inwardly, regretting the words as soon as he'd uttered them. They didn't cover the half of what was going on and he realised at once what Lily's reaction would be:

"W-well, you … I mean, you should tell someone then," she said, a little uncertain. "Or, at least go out and look for him under that cloak of yours. Is he the type to do something stupid, like go into the forest? I-I mean … if he's anything like you - "

"You don't understand," James interrupted, speaking quickly, stopping her in her tracks. He realised with some embarrassment just how much panic had shone through his words when she reached out again, this time to take both his hands in hers.

"I'm listening," she said placidly, though the way her eyes were shining betrayed how upset she was to see him this way. He made sure he was fully together before speaking again.

"He didn't want me to find him," he explained. "He left me a note. I don't have it with me, but - "

"What did it say?" she asked, gentle but eager. "Why did he go?"

"He's afraid," said James. "He … " - just say it James - "He's not born yet in this time, you see. He and Fred used a time turner to get here, and he's afraid of altering the timelines."

There it was, nice and simple.

Lily stared. James had blurted this information out very quickly and it was taking her a moment to digest it. To her credit though it was a remarkably short moment. "You mean, he's from the future, he came back in time, and now he's run off because he thinks that staying here might change the future for the worse?"

"Yes," said James, aware that although she'd caught on quickly, she didn't actually believe him yet. Her tone told him that while she wouldn't dismiss what he'd said out of hand, her muggleborn sense of the ridiculous was coming to the fore. She'd need to question the situation from all angles before accepting it fully. She released his hands and leaned away.

"Why did they come back in time?"

James sighed, though secretly he was a bit relieved. Lily being distracted from her empathy was helping him to get a grip on his emotions. "It was an accident apparently."

"Oh yes. And why are they staying so long? Wouldn't it make sense for them to go back to their own time right away if they're worried about changing things?"

"Dumbledore's got a potion in the mix," James explained. "It'll basically erase any changes they've already made to the timelines. If they go too far, or if they set something huge in motion, the potion won't undo it. But Dumbledore seemed to think it worth the risk."

She nodded as though that made sense. "So … why did he run off, if … is he really your cousin?"

"Yes," James lied firmly. He'd been prepared for that one. She looked at him suspiciously and suddenly he feared he'd answered too quickly.

"He's not a Beaubaton's student though, is he?" she asked, thankfully letting it slide. "Not even a hint of an accent that I could hear."

"No, he's Hogwarts," James confirmed. She was a little irritated now at being lied to, but that only relaxed him even more. He'd always liked it when she got fired up.

"Of course," she said. "So, I take it you don't think we should look for him? You think he was right to run?"

James shook his head. "I don't know," he admitted sadly. "He's been through a lot, and maybe he's right and it's safer this way, but honestly, I don't know if that's enough for me. I mean he's going to be my family, right?" Yours too, he added silently, and cursed to himself as he felt his control over his feelings slip again. What was wrong with him?

There was a long pause as Lily took him in. "There's more to this, isn't there," she said quietly, slipping her hands back into his. "I've never seen you like this. Look at you, you're - " she cut herself off before actually pointing out his unusually wretched state and James was grateful. "Just … if you want me to help you can tell me, or … I mean … well, you know I'm here for you." She was fighting an inner battle; push him for details so she could help him in an informed way (her first instinct, she was a manager at heart), or let him open up on his own terms (the course of action she intellectually considered more appropriate for their relationship).

"I thought I didn't have to tell you," he said with a wry smile, appreciating her more than ever as a tear dripped down his face. She laughed a little; caught, then waited as he mulled over how much more to say.

"Don't tell anyone," he said quietly, deciding he'd share a little more and feeling guilty he wouldn't share it all. Despite what he'd said to Fred earlier, he was still concerned about the timelines, and that compelled him to hold back. "Promise?"

"Promise," she agreed, waiting.

He took a breath. "Harry said something to Sirius before he ran off, something terrible about the future. Sirius told Remus, and now they both act like someone's died but won't tell me why. Harry wouldn't say either, so I went to Fred and he - well he hinted that Harry's been hurt by Voldemort. You know, really hurt." The word "tortured" just didn't want to pass his lips, as though the very sound would compound his failure as protector of his son.

"That's horrible," said Lily sympathetically, her uninformed reaction to the news not half as severe as James's own. He cringed inwardly.

"He's afraid he might try to change his own past I think, or avoid it."

"Well, why shouldn't he change it?" she asked reasonably. "Why shouldn't he change such a terrible thing? I'd think he'd have every right to avoid-"

"Fred thought it would change other things," James interrupted, "put other people in danger."

"Of course," she said, inclining her head, smiling sadly, "timeline theory." James nodded. "Well, whatever's going on here, I don't think he should be alone," she said decisively. "We should find him. Where might he have gone?"

Something about her no nonsense approach made the course of action seem obvious and James found his tears taking a back seat once more as he answered. "I don't know. If he went to Hogsmeade and found a fireplace he could be anywhere. He knows some of the secret passages and he took my broomstick."

"He'd want to avoid people though, wouldn't he?"

"I suppose. In fact, yeah, he would. The Forbidden Forest?"

"Would he risk that?"

"I don't know. I just met him yesterday, Lil."

"Right."

"But it is a starting point."

He stood, and as she went to follow he stopped her. "You should stay here," he said. "I'll get my cloak and come back. Then we'll go together." He moved to the door.

"Wait!" she cried. "You don't want to tell Dumbledore?"

"The less people involved the better, I think," said James, his natural instinct being to avoid teachers when loved ones were breaking rules.

This seemed to make Lily nervous though. "I haven't been into the forest before James," she said. "It's forbidden for a reason you know."

James gave her a half grin and took her gently by the shoulders. "I'll let you in on a secret. I go in there quite a lot. I know what traps not to walk into. You're not exactly defenseless, but if something comes up you're not prepared for, I should be able to handle it."

Lily rolled her eyes. "Why am I not surprised? Alright, get your cloak. I'm giving you five minutes to get back here."

"Five?!"

"Four and fifty-seven seconds now."

He kissed her on the lips and dashed out, always up for a challenge.

Alone, she leaned back against a bedpost, her brow creased with worry as she wondered what it was he was still holding back from her.