Disclaimer: We've been through this. Don't ever mention this again.

Snow-Cold Dreams

I never knew snow could be so cold. It's like having a wet blanket wrapped around me, numbing the pain.

I can stare at the pool of blood in front of me, and not even care.

Not even care that I'm the reason it's there.

Maybe I could have stopped it. If I had tried. But I didn't.

I didn't have to lose my temper; I didn't have to hit her.

But I did.

I was the one who grabbed that crow bar. I was the one who found her outside, shivering from the cold.

It was me.

It was my temper, my anger, that killed her.

I didn't believe it when she tried to warn me; I didn't listen when she shared her fears about... her.

I kept laughing it off.

And when it happened, when... she betrayed us, I still didn't believe it.

Instead I took it out on my friend.

I lifted that crow bar, and I...

I killed her.

I kept slamming it down, kept hitting her.

The blood flew everywhere. It covered the snow, covered the whiteness. Turned it red.

She didn't scream, just groaned. Like it was hurting.

Why did she have to tell me those things?

Why? She'd still be alive if I hadn't had known who to blame.

Someone's behind me. Someone is crying.

"Beast Boy?" Through the choking sobs, I can barely make out the words. "What have you done?"

What have I done? I killed her. Me.

Someone is running towards us, light, quick steps. Then they stop.

"What is the matter-"The voice starts to scream, screaming like they're being ripped apart, like the pain is unbearable.

It's nothing to what I felt. Nothing to what I lost.

"Star! Star, what's-Oh my god... Raven!"

They're all behind me, crying.

"BB," Huh... Sounds like Cyborg. But Cy wouldn't cry. "BB, we have to get you inside"

No. I can't go inside. I have to stay out here. With Raven.

I hold her bloody body tighter. Her face... it's just a red mass. Her violet eyes... they don't look like eyes anymore.

I did this, didn't I? Just because I wouldn't accept the truth about Terra. Wouldn't accept the fact that she had betrayed us.

I had really liked her, you know. Terra was... different from Raven. She had laughed at my jokes, smiled at me. Raven never did. I don't think she even liked me. Not the way I wanted. I had imagined that Terra would always be apart of the group. That we'd end up getting hitched and having a zillion mini Beast Boys.

But it never happened.

Why did you have to be right, Raven? I wouldn't have gotten so mad; I wouldn't have hunted you down with Cyborg's stupid crow bar. I wouldn't have slaughtered you like the animals Cy eats.

I wouldn't be a murderer.

I wouldn't be sitting here, in the dark, dreaming snow-cold dreams.

I hate you, Raven. For knowing what I couldn't see.

I hate... me. For not seeing what you knew.

Snow-cold dreams. Snow-cold hopes.

Snow-cold blood.

I killed her.

And I enjoyed it.

Story Behind the Story: Eh, I'm not the biggest BB/Rav fan walking Earth, so when I heard that BB's would be girlfriend leaves the team for Slade... It's not really a personal thing against the pairing, I mean, it's alright, but hey, that's why this is in the Angst department.