Unconscious Fears
By: Alyson Tierney
Disclaimer: I do not own Lorelai or Rory Gilmore, or any other character associated with Gilmore Girls the way it is seen on television. Those characters and other related things and ideas belong to Amy Sherman-Palladino and the WB Network. However, Alicia and Arielle's characters are figments of my own imagination, so I do own them. Please do not use them without my permission. Thank you.
Author's Note: This story is the sequel to my story "Arielle." Everything that has happened up to the Gilmore Girls episode "Not as Cute as Pushkin" is consistent with this story, but after that, it takes its own path, so relationships and other facts may be different than on the show. I am not a dream doctor, or a medical doctor, nor do I know anything about dreams or medicine, so if the information is way off, please don't shout at me.
Thank you to those who have been reviewing! I'm glad to see some familiar faces as well as some new ones. It's each and every one of yours' feedback, comments, likes, and dislikes that helps this story.. Enjoy and please review if you wish!
CHAPTER EIGHT
Rory hurried alongside the gurney as the paramedics wheeled her mom inside the emergency room entrance. The ambulance ride was short, but it seemed like an eternity for Rory. The paramedics had told her that since her mom was breathing and her blood pressure and pulse were normal, that it was a good sign. She was still completely terrified.
She barely noticed the paramedics reciting her mom's vitals to the doctors, who took over. They hurried into what Rory assumed from watching so much ER was one of the trauma rooms. The doctors were flashing by in a flurry of activity, calling out medical jargon left and right.
"Rory?" she heard a familiar voice call out. She looked up into the friendly face of Dr. Julia Lockham. Rory and Lorelai had met her a few times before, when they'd visited the hospital for broken bones, and once when Lorelai's appendix had burst.
"Dr. Lockham." Rory flashed a small smile, "You're here."
"Of course I am. I heard that my favorite patients were coming." Dr. Lockham adjusted one of the knobs on a piece of equipment, and went to Rory's side, "Can you tell me what happened?"
"She fell. She was outside cleaning the rain gutters, and I was outside, too, but I came back inside to get the…oh, my god, I left my macaroni bowl on the counter. I didn't clean it. Now the cheese is going to be all stuck to the bowl." Rory's mind was going a mile a minute as she remembered.
"Rory. It's okay." Dr. Lockham's gentle voice broke through her reverie, "So she fell from the roof, then?"
Rory nodded, miserably, "Yeah. Is she…will she be okay?"
"We're going to send her upstairs for a head CT, and then we'll know more." Dr. Lockham smiled supportively, "Do you want to go upstairs with us? You and I can wait outside the room while they work."
Rory gave the doctor a slight nod, "Okay. Will…will she be scared?"
"There's nothing to be afraid of. She'll be fine." Dr. Lockham smiled and squeezed Rory's shoulder supportively. Rory was glad she was there. She felt just the tiniest bit better knowing the familiar face was working with her mom. She watched for a few moments, glad that the doctors hadn't kicked her out of the room. A lot of larger hospitals did that, but Dr. Lockham and the others clearly knew the Gilmore girls well enough to know that Rory would want to be as close to her mom as possible.
The doctors seemed to slow their flurry of activity a few minutes later, loading the equipment on the bed and wheeling Lorelai out of the trauma room. Rory caught a glimpse of her face. Lorelai was pale and her eyes were closed. Rory felt her heart clench and skip a few beats. Biting back the tears that threatened to come, she followed Dr. Lockham as she gestured to Rory. She wasn't going to cry now, now she needed to be strong for Lorelai. She walked alongside the bed, her hand on Lorelai's, all the way up the elevator to the CT floor.
When they reached the room, Rory leaned down and kissed Lorelai's forehead lightly, "I love you." She whispered, watching as they took Lorelai into the room.
Dr. Lockham let Rory stand there for a few moments before speaking, "Rory?"
Rory didn't look at her, instead just watched the goings-on in the room, through the small window in the door. She wanted to stay as close to her mom as possible, almost as though she would get better faster the closer Rory was to her.
"Rory." Dr. Lockham called again, "Do you want to sit?"
Rory shook her head, her gaze not leaving the window, "No. I'm staying here."
Dr. Lockham nodded understandingly, "Do you want some coffee?"
Rory shook her head again. All she really wanted right now was her mom. It was like her dreams had invaded real life now, "What's a head CT, anyway?" Rory asked suddenly, looking up into the doctor's green eyes.
"It's a picture of your mom's head. It'll let us check and see what her brain is doing. They use that machine that you see there to take a bunch of pictures and let us see what's going on in that head of hers. It's not at all painful." Dr. Lockham said, pointing into the room.
"What happens if something that's not supposed to go on in her head is going on in her head?" Rory asked.
"Then the other doctors and I will discuss the next step, and make sure you're on board with what's happening." Dr. Lockham said, smiling reassuringly.
Rory nodded, "Okay." She was terrified to ask what exactly could go wrong. She'd heard stories of people being permanently brain damaged, never walking or talking again. She shuddered quietly, wrapping her arms around herself.
"Dr. Lockham?" A doctor's voice called out from inside the room.
"Excuse me a moment, Rory." Dr. Lockham smiled at her, heading into the room. Rory watched as the doctors talked animatedly, gesturing to the computer. She could see her mom's form through the glass. She couldn't see her face, though, but she was there. She felt a pang of guilt as she remembered their snippy words to each other this morning. She noticed the doctors looking at her, concerned, and her heart sank. Was something wrong?
Dr. Lockham exited the room, and came to Rory's side, "Rory?" She said, her tone soft and concerned.
"What's wrong?" Rory said, her senses immediately on high alert. She backed up a few paces, tightening her arms around herself.
"When your mom fell, she got some bruising inside her head. It caused some bleeding…" Dr. Lockham said, gently.
"No…" Rory said, her voice quivering.
"Honey, we need to operate to stop it." Dr. Lockham said, her voice soft but firm.
Rory gasped softly, "Operate?"
"We'll put a small tube in to drain the blood. We've done this many times here." Dr. Lockham said, reassuringly, "She'll be asleep."
Rory nodded, "And if you don't, she'd…"
Dr. Lockham nodded slightly, "She'd never wake up. We need your consent to do it."
Rory remembered a conversation she and Lorelai had a few years back, about Lorelai not wanting to be a permanent vegetable. She knew what needed to be done, "Okay. Do it."
"Okay. This is a paper simply saying that its okay for us to operate on your mom, and do everything we can to make sure she gets out of the operating room successfully." Dr. Lockham said, handing Rory a clipboard, "Just sign it on the bottom."
Rory's fingers trembled as she signed the paper. She handed it back to Dr. Lockham, and watched as the doctors wheeled her mom out of the CT room. She rested her hand on her mother's head, feeling how warm she was. She then jerked back, remembering that it was her head that was hurt. She began stroking her mom's shoulder, giving her mom her own strength.
Rory barely registered the hospital hallways going by, as they trooped into an elevator, back out of the elevator, and down another hall. "Rory?" Dr. Lockham's voice brought Rory back to reality, "You can't go in the pre-op room, but you and I can wait outside, okay?"
Rory nodded, "Okay." Leaning down, she kissed her mother, whispering in her ear, "Stay strong. I need you." Rory watched as they wheeled the most important person in her life away, into the throngs of all the medical equipment in the world.
She felt herself being pulled away by Dr. Lockham. Crossing her arms, she sat down in a chair across the hallway from the operating rooms. She felt tears sting the back of her eyelids, but she choked them back. She wasn't going to cry now. Lorelai needed her to be strong now more than anything.
