A/N This is my first sad attempt at fanfiction/phanfiction. I realize that it is short and pointless, but ya know thats okay. Please review but do not set me afire with flames!
"Some of you may recall the strange affair of the Phantom of the Opera"… Oh yes, I recall it as if it were just yesterday. You see, it was this strange affair which shook my peaceful existence and showed me a life I never would have dreamt in the depths of the Opera Populaire. A life without grass, hay or oats. A life of darkness and strange noises emitted from the mouth. Feeble attempts at neighing perhaps.
One day I was just an average horse in the Parisian livery stable close to the Opera. Pulling carriages, being ridden (and/or squashed) by overweight noblemen, eating hay, chasing around pretty mares in the field, etc. etc.
Then, one quiet afternoon a strange masked man came and took me from my comfortable straw-filled stall. He smelled oddly, of hatred and grief. It made me rather nervous. Oh well, at least he wasn't an overweight nobleman. And he did not yank me about by my bridle like some ignorant fools, but rubbed my neck and led me gently. Led me deep deep down. To the dungeons of his black despair you see. It was dank and gloomy, a dead ringer for a dungeon. Water dripped down the mossy stones, and every sound bounced and echoed, a strange effect that made it sound as though there were a whole herd of horses down there, not just my oh so humble self. He tied my reins to a ring in the wall and left me there. So I waited. And waited. And waited. And eventually fell asleep. Although it was a rather depressing place for a nap. I think there were rats. Ugggh…shudder. I don't like rats very much…. Ever since the time when I was just a little foal and the barn cat left one in my feed bucket…. But I digress.
Several hours later, I was awoken by much noise. It sounded as though a whole herd of humans had stampeded into the opera house. The show was about to begin! The echoing music filled the chamber in which I was tied. I tried to block out the sound, but sadly enough a horse's legs simply do NOT bend in a very convenient way with which to cover the ears. Although I did rather like "Think of Me"…A truly haunting rendition I must say. Humans, they think horses have no appreciation for music. Of course we do! We, however, generally prefer the sound of a babbling brook, a chorus of chirping birds, or the whispered speech of the grass… and then it's screams as we rip it out by it's roots. But honestly, I don't know what these humans see in all their shrieking. It makes me twitchy. And if they're trying to whinny, they're doing a poor job of it. Once again, that is not the point of my recollection…
As the opera ended, the strange man who brought me here rushed by. I only had to wait a matter of minutes this time before he returned, bringing a young filly with him. She was nickering at the top of her lungs. I recognized the voice of the singer of that lovely aria. The man quickly untied me, lifting the filly onto my back. She weighed practically nothing, I suspected that only the fabric of her dress kept her from floating off my back. But then I am not much of a judge of human weight, as I am unused to carrying passengers not of the overweight noblemen variety. She continued shrieking as I carried her. The man was leading me; he obviously didn't trust me with the reins. I didn't blame him… she did seem a little "off." I mean, who sings WHILE they ride a horse into some moldy old dungeons? Really. And then he made me go down stairs… how unsympathetic of him. Has he not noticed that four legged beings, especially those of the equine variety, are not of a suitable build for descending those odd creations? However, they were not very steep so I managed. The man proceeded to neigh back at the filly. So much for him being sane. He promptly lifted the girl off of me, and tied me to another ring in the wall.
Wow. I carried her about thirty feet. How POINTLESS was that? I mean, she has legs! She continued to walk perfectly fine after she got off me! I really don't understand what the point was… and he made me wait in the dark for ever so long. He finally returned me to my stable in the middle of the night, while the filly was asleep I believe.
The next day my life returned to normal. And I unfortunately had to drag a fatter than usual noble around a hunt course. But that strange incident refused to leave my mind… except when there were oats about. I finally heard more about it, stable gossip you know. The mare in the stall next to mine is apparently a good friend of one of the horses who pulls the carriage of the Opera's patron, the Vicomte de Changy. I personally don't like him much… just because he's a pure white Andalusian he thinks he's all high and mighty. Neighs down to me, seems to think of me merely as a common carthorse. Harumph. Well anyways, she said that he said that the Vicomte is engaged to that very filly that I carried down to the catacombs of the Opera. And apparently this horse (Sir High and Mighty Andalusian, that is) witnessed a most terrible sword fight between the Vicomte and that masked man, who is apparently known as the Phantom. The Phantom lost, but escaped, and shortly afterwards there was a huge fire caused by none other than my masked friend that destroyed the Opera house. There was a massive manhunt, but he was not found… Ahh well. I must say I do hope he was alright. I was rather annoyed by how unnecessary it was for me to be brought down there, but it was rather exciting. Variety is the spice (and molasses) of life you know. I do hope his neighing improves. Perhaps I could give him lessons. My friend, my tale (tail) has now come to an end. Thank you, do come again! (With carrots next time please.)
