Disclaimer:Family Matters and Step by Step are property of Miller/Boyett productions and I lay no claim to them.
This story takes place after Steve gets back from space.
New Romances
by John Chubb
At the Winslow house the guys were getting ready for Steve Urkel's bachelor party. He was finally going to marry Laura Winslow after so many years of rejection, only to find her having fallen for him. And now she was going to marry him.
"So is everyone at the club?" Laura asked.
"Almost, I'm expecting a friend to arrive soon." Steve said.
The back door of the Winslow house knocked and Steve went to open the door. On the other side of it was Steve's friend from Port Washington, Mark Foster.
"Hey Steve!" Mark said as he greeted his old science friend with a nerdy handshake. Steve returned the handshake and the two couldn't have looked like bigger boobs. "So how's Port Washington?"
"Great!" Mark said. "Some of us have found significant others. While others of us are...still searching."
"I won't ask who." Steve said. "So how did you get down here for the bachelor party?"
"Oh Al drove me down." Mark said. "She needed to get out of the house for a while so she volunteered to drive me."
"Parents wanted the kids out of the house?" Steve asked.
"Well it's not as bad as how your parents wanted you out of the house." Mark said. Steve then asked "So how is Al anyway? I haven't seen her since she did that movie role the first time. After that well..."
"The so-called lotion commercial?" Mark asked. "I know. She was embarrassed when she found out it was a 976 number."
"Tell me about it. Eddo almost called it himself." Steve replied. "So how is she?"
"She's fine." Mark said. "She's studying acting, and is looking to intern at one of the Chicago theatres. That's one of the reasons she drove me up here."
"Al's here?" Steve asked, Laura then asked "Who's Al?"
Just then the door of the Winslow house opened again. And at the door was a light brown haired young girl who was a far cry from the tomboy Steve Urkel remembered. Here was a young woman who in his mind, had beauty that rivaled Laura's. But she also had a bit of an edge that said "Don't mess with me." Steve looked at Al and pointed "That's Al."
"Al what are you doing here?" Mark asked.
"You left your spare bottle of cologne in the car." Al said holding up a small bottle. "Hoping to catch a stripper coming out of the cake?"
"Oh. Uhhhh." Mark said. Steve looked dumbfounded. He didn't know if there was going to be a stripper or not. In his heart he hoped not. He didn't want to be unfaithful to Laura. Steve's apprehension was elevated when Laura asked "Is there going to be a stripper there?"
"How should I know?" Steve asked. "I didn't plan the party. Eddo did." This was all the confirmation Laura needed.
"In that case there will be a stripper." Laura said. She then cast a look in Steve's direction and said "Steve, I love you. But if I find that you are doing anything unfaithful I will hunt you down like a dog and hogtie you to a tree until you call me 'Mistress.'" Steve got the message and Al couldn't help but smirk a bit. "You kind of remind me of a stepsister I know."
Laura then turned to Al and then asked "And you are?"
"Al Lambert. 'Al's' short for Alicia." Al offered her hand and Laura shook it.
Mark went to Steve and said "Let's go. I think this is a moment of female bonding." Steve nodded and followed his friend leaving Al and Laura alone.
"So how do you know Steve?" Laura asked Al.
"We dated once." Al replied. This got a look from Laura. "You dated Steve?"
"Surprised?" Al asked.
"For two reasons. One that Steve didn't tell me, and two that anyone would date Steve." Al had to agree with those reasons. "I don't think a date was something Steve had in mind. Besides it was only one time, and he did it to help me through a tough time."
"Oh what happened?" Laura asked.
"I was set to go to a school dance with another guy." Al explained. "Only for him to dump me. Steve was visiting Mark at the time and I was telling him how I was sick of hearing from people who have never been dumped."
Laura gave Al a look that said 'You've got to be kidding'. Al smiled at the look and agreed. "Steve looked the same way. He said that when it came to being dumped, he was the king. But that it was important to get back on the horse and try again. And since I didn't have a date available Steve offered to go with me."
"Did you have a good time?" Laura asked.
"Yeah." Al answered. "I found the guy I was supposed to go with there, but I said I didn't want to be there with him. I was with Steve, and we all did the Urkel dance there."
"Ah yes. The Urkel dance." Laura said with rememberance as she remembeed the same dance she and other friends did at a friend's house. Steve got drunk there thanks to a joke from Willy Fubner, and almost got killed. But that was another time and place. Right now she wanted answers from Al. "So what happened next?"
"Well Steve walked me home, and said that as much as he enjoyed the time we had together his heart belonged to another back home. I thanked him and said I enjoyed the time we had." Laura smiled at Al's story. It was vintage Steve all the way.
"I'm glad Steve was able to help you." Laura said. "It seems like that's something Steve specializes at."
"Well that and his brain, and being a klutz, and a pain sometimes." Al answered. Laura smiled at Al's response. She had to admit she liked Al Lambert. "So what brings you to Chicago?"
"Looking into acting opportunities." Al replied. "I figured that it might be a good thing if I looked into the Chicago theatres to gain experience before I try to make the eventual move to L.A."
"So you're taking the El to the theatre district?" Laura asked.
"Yeah. I've got meetings there."Al said "Don't worry I'll be back in time to pick Mark back up."
"No worries." Laura said. "I'm sure he'll be fine. Steve's with him and so's dad."
"What about your brother Eddie?" Al asked. "I've heard he tries to be a ladies man, and he might try to...tempt Steve."
"Don't worry." Laura said with a smile. "If anything the joke will be on Eddie." Al wondered what Laura had in mind, but decided not to ask. "Nice meeting you."
"Nice meeting you too Al." Laura said as Al went out the door heading for the theatre district.
In the Winslow driveway Carl, Eddie, Mark and Steve were getting into the family car as Al walked by. "Have fun guys. Don't do anything I wouldn't do."
Mark answered with "I'm not sure we could do anything you wouldn't do.". Al gave a wiseguy smile and made her way down to the El stop.
"So everybody in?" Carl asked. Mark then asked "Mr. Winslow? Will there be any alcohol at this party?"
"No Mark. It's got to be a dry party. One, because Steve still has friends that are underage, and two Steve can't hold his liquor." Carl answered.
"Besides, I don't want a repeat of what happened when Willy Fubner crashed Maxine's party." Steve answered. Steve drank cups of spiked punch and almost went over a ledge. Rachel risked her life to help save him as he hung from a ledge.
"Well will there be girls there?" Mark asked. This was a question Eddie himself was happy to answer.
"Oh I'm sure we can accomodate you little buddy." Eddie said thinking about the plans he had laid out. Carl was briefly worried about what would happen, but soon they rolled out of the Winslow driveway to the club where Steve's bachelor party was going to be held.
Laura watched Steve and her family go and found herself missing him already. Not an hour had passed when the door knocked and Laura went to answer it. Laura was surprised to see who it was. "Stefan?" she asked upon seeing the person on the other side.
"Hey Laura." Stefan said. "Can I come in?"
"Sure. We can talk on the back porch." Laura led Stefan through the house towards the back porch. All the while looking at Laura. Laura knew what Stefan wanted to say before he would even say it. In some ways she had been dreading this conversation.
Stefan sat on the porch bench as Laura sat down next to him. "I'm sorry Stefan. I didn't want to hurt you."
"I know Laura." Stefan said. "It's just that...I was supposed to be the one for you. And I find that you're with Steve now, about to be married. It just hurts too much to be next to you."
"I'm sorry." Laura said. "You know, if anyone said I'd be marrying Steve Urkel five years ago...or ten years ago...or FIFTEEN years ago. I'd have said..."
"That they were crazy?" Stefan asked. Laura smiled and couldn't help but nod. "And yet here I am. Ready to marry him."
Stefan smiled as well. "I'd like to say that I'm happy for Steve, but I can't. All I can say is that I feel like I'm in a dark hole of sorrow and despair. And I don't see any way out."
"You'll find someone." Laura said. "Someone as handsome as you can't be lonely forever."
"But they won't be you." Stefan said. "I could have any girl I wanted in the world, and they still wouldn't compare to you."
Laura nodded. "I've been told I'm quite the catch. But I'm hardly the poster child of perfection."
"You are to me." Stefan said. "And you always will be."
Laura couldn't help but blush. "I'm glad to hear that Stefan. But don't worry about me. I'll be fine. Take care of yourself. You'll find someone out there for you."
Stefan smiled weakily and said "I just hope it's not Myra. That girl clearly has some issues."
"Tell me about it." Laura said as she went back into the house. Stefan decided to sit on the porch a while alone.
Stefan sat on the porch for hours looking at the stars thinking of what might have been with him and Laura. After a while Al came on the porch back from her meeting and noticed Stefan sitting alone. "Excuse me. Do you live here?"
"No." Stefan said. "I did once, but I'm not sure I have one now. Al looked at Stefan and decided that this was a guy who needed a friend and sat by his side. "So how are you doing?"
"Lousy." Stefan said. "The woman I love is about to marry another guy."
Al caught a look at Stefan and was surprised. "Oh my god! You're Stefan Urkelle aren't you? The model from Paris?"
"Yep that's me." Stefan said. "But I don't feel like modelling all that much lately."
"Feeling dumped aren't you?" Al asked. Stefan nodded.
"I swear. This must be the worst feeling known to man." Stefan said. "I don't know how anyone gets past it."
"It's not easy." Al said. "Trust me I speak from experience." Stefan looked at Al and wondered what she meant.
"Let's just say that I have had my share of break ups...and dumpings." Al said. "First one's always the hardest."
"Oh?" Stefan asked. "Could you tell me about it?"
Al nodded as she began her story. "It was the day of the spring dance, and my date decided he was going to drop me for another girl. I really felt lousy and thought I was the only one in the world that had felt this pain, or even understood it. Then I met someone, and he told me how important it was to get back up and not to let things get me down. I wound up taking him to the dance instead, and when I saw the guy I was supposed to go with ask me for a dance I said no. And I wound up having a good time."
Stefan looked at Al and asked "The guy wouldn't happen to have been named 'Steve Urkel' would he? The guy you dated?"
"Yeah how'd you know?" Al asked.
"Let's just say...I know him pretty well. In fact he made me everything I am today." Al looked at Stefan and said "Well he did a good job from what I've seen."
"Not too good." Stefan said. "He never taught me how to get over heartache."
"No that's never easy." Al said. "It really sucks to give something all your heart and then... You know for a time I thought about not caring too much about a boy I was dating. Not throwing my heart into the relationship."
"And what happened?" Stefan asked.
"It didn't hurt any less." Al said. "In fact it hurt even more, because I was always wondering if there was something I could have done to keep the relationship going."
"You know. I don't get it." Stefan said. "How could someone as pretty as you get dumped? A man would have to be out of his mind to turn you away." Al blushed slightly embarrased by Stefan's compliment. "I'm not that pretty." she said.
"Sure you are." Stefan said. "You are a very pretty girl. Why right now I'm thinking about taking you to a nice romantic dinner, combined with a night of dancing, and a moonlit walk down the Navy Pier. Why just now I see the moon shining on your hair casting a golden glow illuminating you among the night sky." Stefan stepped back giving Al a full view. Al felt embarrassed. "Have you ever modelled?" Stefan then asked.
"I've done some acting." Al said. "Some community theatre, I've been in a movie, and a 976 commercial I'd rather not mention again."
"No worries." Stefan said. "None of that matters now. Right now let me show you a good time. Stefan Urkelle style."
Al Lambert smiled. She couldn't refuse that invitation.
Soon Al and Stefan left the Winslow porch to see Chicago from a different perspective. A romantic one.
At the bachelor party everything was going okay. The guests were having a good time watching strippers dancing before them, except for Steve who looked like he would be having a heart attack if he didn't see Laura soon. "Oooohhhh! the agony. Laura where are you?"
Eddie and Waldo then left the main room to see to the surprise in the back. A giant cake was ready to be wheeled out to be a surprise for Steve. As the cake was being wheeled Eddie asked Waldo if everything was okay.
"Yeah. My cooking school teacher has given me a glowing recommendation for overseas study." Waldo answered. Eddie had something else in mind though.
"Has the cake been checked?" Eddie asked Waldo.
"Yeah. Only the stripper is in it." Waldo answered. Eddie rolled his eyes and said "No. I mean is the stripper Myra?"
"You want Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse to be the stripper in the cake?" Waldo asked. "What kind of a man are you?" Eddie sighed as he listened to Waldo. "No Waldo I want to make sure Myra is not in the cake, or anywhere else for that matter. I don't want to see her at this party we're throwing for Steve. He doesn't need a heart attack from Myra's crazy antics."
"Oh don't worry. Myra's not the stripper." Waldo said. Eddie breathed a sigh of relief at that until Wadlo spoke again. "Myrtle is."
A look of horror crossed Eddie's face as he looked at Waldo. "You...you mean...Myrtle Urkel is in that cake?"
As if on cue the cake burst open and Myrtle stood up wearing a pink lingere' number that this author is too scared to describe, mostly due to the way it looks on Myrtle. So I'll just continue on saying that Myrtle jumped out of the cake, saw Eddie in her sights and said "There you are my big hunk o' yankee man."
Eddie tried to run for the door only to find it locked. Myrtle ran after him in hot pursuit all throughout the bar. A few minutes later the real stripper came out hopping due to her being bound and gagged.
Once the stripper was freed, she took off after Myrtle, who was still after Eddie. The three way chase was on.
Mark looked at Myrtle and couldn't believe what he was seeing. "That has to be the ugliest stripper I've ever seen. She's not even dancing for Steve."
Steve nodded, grateful that his love for Laura would not be tempted. Because in his heart, nothing could break him away from her.
As soon as everyone got home Eddie made to the bathroom to rince with antiseptic to get the 'stench' of Myrtle off his lips. Carl went upstairs looking to get ready for Harriet to get home, and Steve and Laura discussed what happened that night. "So how was the party?" she asked.
"A night to remember." Steve said. "Myrtle came out of the cake giving Eddie the chase while the stripper Myrtle bound and gagged came out in pursuit. Laura nodded thinking that the events sounded like they happened in true Urkel fashion. "So how about you?"
"Well Stefan stopped by." Laura said. "We kind of said our goodbyes when it came to our relationship." Steve empathized with Stefan. Like Laura Steve didn't want to hurt Stefan either. "Have you seen him recently?"
"Well he was on the back porch last." Laura said as she opened the door and saw Stefan with Al. A smile on both their faces. "Hey Laura." Stefan said with Al on his arm.
"Stefan you okay?" Laura asked. Stefan nodded and looked at Al. "I'm fine. I was just showing Al the sights."
"He's a great tour guide." Al said. She cast a look in Stefan's way and said "And a great date."
This got looks from Steve and Laura. "Date?"
"Nothing we had planned mind you." Stefan said. "But when Al appeared to pick up her brother we got to talking. Then we started seeing the sights. Then before we knew it we found we had so much in common. Then the date became more...romantic."
"And we danced among the stars." Al said. "Shared a romantic walk. Before I knew it we were kissing."
Laura smiled. Stefan worked fast, and he kept the romance interesting as usual. "So does this mean you've found someone Stefan?"
Stefan looked at Al and said "Yeah, I think I have."
"I'm glad." Laura said. Steve said that he was glad too.
"Thanks Steve. For everything." Stefan said. Soon he and Al were out the door heading to Port Wahsington ready to take Al home. Mark however was left behind going "Wait for me! Wait for me!"
Laura and Steve watched Stefan and Al leave the Winslow house. "You think they're going to be okay?" Laura asked.
"I think they'll be fine." Steve said. "After all Stefan has the Urkel charm doesn't he?"
Laura laughed as she and Steve went back into the living room.
Meanwhile in a bedroom in another house another young woman was plotting. Her room was surrounded in wallpaper and blankets that had Steve's face on it as she looked over her latest plan to get 'her Stevie' back.
"I will have you back Steven." Myra Boutros Boutros Monkhouse said as she looked at the vile that had Steve Urkel's DNA in it. "One way or another."
End of Story.
