Disclaimer: I own nothing, just the plot. I forgot to put that the two songs in last chapter were "Eerytime" by Britney Spears, and "Surrender" by Celine Dion.
I'm not so crazy about this chapter. I mean, I've got what I want to happen in it... I just dunno... I may rewrite it. Let me know what you think.
Chapter Fifteen
God grant me the serenityTo accept the things I cannot change…
Accept…
She was in love. A strange love indeed, most of which was immersed in agony and pain. But that agony was what drove the ecstasy to its fullest point, making it all seem livable. Hermione knew she could never escape him. It was a common theme the two lovers shared, the one of foreboding, yet indescribable comprehension. Draco had tried to run once before. He had tried tearing both of them down and resisting the urge that dwelled deep within him. It didn't work. They both figured that they would just have to embrace this love since there was nothing else they could do.
The courage to change the things I can…
Courage…
Now that was something they both lacked miserably. Hermione couldn't even turn Harry down for Christ's sake! Draco didn't have the courage to go against his father's will and rebel against the Dark Lord. They were both weak, so incredibly weak. Once upon a time they had the defenses built up strong enough to have this courage. Once upon a time those defenses were smashed to pieces.
And the wisdom to know the difference…Wisdom…
This may be the most important part, the wisdom. Often failures are blamed for not being able to change due to events being out of hand's control. Many times consequences that could happen are overlooked by this lack of wisdom. One does not know what they cannot change until they've tried.
It's like that saying… If at first you don't succeed get back up and try again. Too many people suffer from the illusion that they can't get back up. Instead they rot on the ground forever. It's rather pathetic.
It seems so easy that this one little prayer could solve everything. Asking God for these simple minded favors could do wonders. Too easy, so therefore must be false. But what about someone else? Asking God seems ludicrous, you can't even see the guy. But what if you were to try to derive acceptation, courage, and wisdom from someone else? How about someone laying right beside you in your bed that you can hear, see, and feel with your own senses?
Hermione could feel his arm draped over her. A lovely warmth was spread throughout her bed. She smiled to herself as her eyes remained shut. It was nice waking up to a gentle warmth and not a harsh coldness. Stirring slightly, she opened her eyes open and gave a slight yawn. Draco must have detected it, for his arms tightened around her as she felt his body pressing closer to hers.
A rough, scratchy voice filled her ears, making her entire body want to just melt into a puddle. "Mornin' love," he mumbled as he nuzzled his face into her neck. Hermione sighed, letting her eyes close again and wanting to let sleep take over her once more. It had been so long since she had good sleep, she wanted more.
"MMmm…." She moaned, trying to snuggle closer to him. "Time?" she managed to get out in her state of sleepiness.
Draco began to stretch out his lower body, or at least what he could while pressed so tight to her. He kissed her neck, and then the flesh on her beck right below it. "Breakfast," he whispered lightly. "We have school—"
A loud high pitched whine. He chuckled at Hermione's attempts to shush him. She waved her arm about, finally placing a finger on his lips. Draco kissed it gingerly as she turned around to face him.
"You mustn't say such cruel things this early in the morning…" she whined, burying her face in his chest. Draco scooped his arms around her fragile body. "What do you suggest I do then?" he whispered hoarsely in her ear.
Hermione pressed him back and rolled on top of him so that he was on his back. She proceeded to grab as much comforter as possible and buried the two of them in it. Rubbing her eyes, she yawned and mumbled some things that Draco didn't quite catch. The sight was too cute and made him laugh.
Hermione had never heard Draco laugh before. As far as she knew, he wasn't capable of it. She would have poked and taunted him about it, but was far too tired to do so. Draco sensed her drifting back off to sleep. He gently rubbed her back.
"You can't go back to sleep, Hermione," he said. Hermione once again waved her arm around and put a finger on his lips again. Draco grabbed her hand, kissing it soothingly and intertwining his finger with hers. "I have an idea…" he said.
"Cut class?" Hermione asked hopefully.
"In a way, but you're still going to have to get out of bed." He answered back.
"I don't like it!" Hermione pouted, face still buried in his upper torso. Draco rolled his eyes.
"Are you suggesting that we just stay in bed all bloody day long?" Draco asked sarcastically. Hermione looked up at him and smiled. Moving closer to him, she placed a very awakening kiss on his lips. Draco knew what she was up to… but he didn't stop it. Suddenly the two of them weren't so tired anymore.
His eyes were glazed over as they stared out to the horizon. Many thoughts had bombarded his head that he just didn't want to handle anymore. This up and down relationship he had with life was becoming so predictable and monotonous. Footsteps could be heard near him and he smiled sadly as Hermione joined him on the tower.
At first he didn't know what to say, fiddling with her mass of frizzy hair as she sat next to him and leaned against his chest. The two sat in silence contemplating how to bring this touchy subject up.
"Holiday's just around the corner," he said with no emotion present in his voice. Hermione sighed softly, not sure of how this conversation would go and a bit scared of it as well.
"You don't have to go back," she stated absentmindedly.
"He'll kill me if I don't," he whispered. "He'll kill you if you do!" she retorted.
Draco sighed. The week had been so glorious for him. He spent the days content with what was going on, making through everything with anticipation for the nights. He smiled to himself, wrapping an arm around her. The nights… the nights were in fact the only thing he lived for now a days. He spent every minute of them in her arms, making love, whispering confessions in her receiving ears, and learning that beauty in the world was not completely dead.
"You could always stay here," Hermione insisted. "They can't even dream of touching you is you stayed here on the school grounds." Draco began to bite his lip. The thought sounded very wonderful, but he knew they would get to him one way or another. He shook his head.
"I have to go back…" he exhaled. Hermione didn't argue. She knew as well as he did the truth. Sure, she could always come up with every possible scenario possible, but none of them would work.
"What do you want me to do?" she asked, feeling defeated by his words and fate's ultimate decision.
Draco knew she would ask that, he would have smirked to himself had the situation at hand not been so… however the way it was. He unwrapped his arm, reaching into his robe and pulled out a tiny vile. Holding in front of them, he sighed.
"Do you know what this is?" he asked. Hermione only shook her head no, so he went on. "This is exactly enough Fiducia potion for two people…"
Hermione remembered this potion from the beginning of the year. It was a reliance potion that bonded two people together permanently. If one was to ever need the other, they just had to call for them and that person would be transported immediately. It was indeed a wonderful potion, but had a great cost to it. It was irreversible and who only knew what someone could get into when the other partner was in grave danger.
Draco didn't need to explain to her why he had it. Reaching out, Hermione took the potion. Carefully opening the vile, she consumed half of the sloshing liquid. Draco's heart soared briefly and he smiled. Taking the vial in his hand, he emptied the rest of the contents himself. Draco and Hermione looked at each other. He smiled sweetly before tenderly kissing the woman he loved.
Hermione began to cry. Her body began to shake violently as the tears spilled from her closed eyes. Draco took her into his arms, continuing and deepening the kiss. He couldn't contain himself and allowed his own tears to escape along with hers.
"I'm so scared, Draco," Hermione cried. Draco embraced her and held on to her shivering body. "Me too…" he whispered in her ear.
Swallowing his tears, he pulled away and looked her square in the eyes. "I swear…" he huffed painfully, "I swear on my love for you that I will never let you suffer alone. I won't leave you behind, I promise!" Hermione said nothing.
She didn't believe him. She could believe promises to fight so he could return. She could believe promises that he would always love her. But she couldn't believe promises that he wouldn't leave her behind. Shaking her head, she refused the idea. Draco got up from where they had been sitting and stormed to the edge of the tower. Turning back around, his eyes were livid.
"I can keep that promise Hermione!" he said trying to plead with her. "Now, right now! I can prove it to you!" Hermione rose from her seat, still shaking her head.
"How?" she croaked.
Draco looked over his shoulder to the stone wall that prevented people from just falling off the tower. "I know a place," he said. "I know a place where we could be together forever. I know a place where neither one of us could be left behind." Hermione stepped closer to him, fully listening to his elaboration of this perfect utopia.
"All we have to do…" he held her hand and drew her closer. He turned himself around and guided her to the rail to the tower. "…Is jump".
Hermione looked over the ledge to the ground below. The idea was very tempting.
Courage…She shook her head. "We can't do that Draco…" she whispered. Draco frowned and let his shoulders sink. Hermione licked her lips, trying to form the right words.
"Draco," she said turning to look him in the eye. "We've been running all this time. Jumping would be just another form of running. You and I have been to hell and back in a hand basket—" Draco shushed her with his finger.
"Say no more," he begged and kissed her.
It was settled. He'd go back home over the holidays. He'd confront his father and Lord Voldemort… for the last time.
