Who loves the chocolate? Everybody loves the chocolate! 'Cuz nobody hates the chocolate! 'Cuz everybody loves the chocolate!
...Um, yeah.
I'm sick today, and typing and interneting is the only thing I'm allowed to do besides sleep. Oh, what I'd give to be able to run around in circles, laughing and giggling, without hacking up a lung.
Chapter Seven...Jail Time, Schmail Time
"Okay, think Sanzo. Hakkai's going to be thrown in drug rehab and a mental institution...Gojyo's going to be trampled at his own expense, but the media's fortune...and Goku's going to be thrown in jail...no, prison...that's more like it," thought Sanzo as he paced in a back alley.
"Hey, nice dress," said a nearby hobo.
"Shut up," growled Sanzo. He leaned against the wall (covered in graffiti and muck) and stroked his invisble beard,"Hm... Hm... Hum... Hmmm... Huummm... Hrrruumm... This isn't working! Grr! Why am I the only one that is smart enough not to anger the American authorities?...I had faith in you Hakkai! Damn you! DAMN YOU ALL!"
"Ah, shut up!" yelled another hobo as he threw an empty food can at Sanzo. Sanzo stepped to the side to avoid it.
"Hey Herb!" asked the hobo to the first one,"Who am I?" the hobo picked up the can and crushed it to make it cone-shaped. He spoke into the smaller end, in a mocking voice,"Hey, hey you! You're under arrest!"
"Ahaha! That's great! You're the NYPD!" laughed "Herb".
Tick, tick, tick, tick (went Sanzo's brain) tick, tick, tick, tick...DING! "I'VE GOT IT!" exclaimed Sanzo as he headed out to the street once more.
"Oh? Dinner's ready," said Herb, as he went to stop the timer they had rescued from the trash. He then picked their meal off of a small fire they had started.
"Thank you, street bretheren!" yelled Sanzo as he ran out into the distance.
"What'd we do?" asked the other hobo.
"Best not to ask...Especially when dealing with luneys..."
Sanzo ran down the street, headed toward another, where Goku was supposedly being chased right now,"How could I have missed something as simple as THAT? I mean...it's so simple!"
With Goku. Goku was still being chased by cops. The cops were old and not as full of energy as Goku; they were sweating bulllets...and shooting them.
"MUHAHAHAHA! chomp AHAHAHAHA! munch," cackled Goku as he ate some Chinese out of the takeout box.
"Damn that kid! He's not human!" cried an officer.
Goku latched on to the side off a building, and started climbing. Once he reached the top (fifty stories up), the police just got to the bottom of the building,"MUHOHOHO! Just TRY and catch me now! With the mystical powers of the Chinese swimming within my internal organs, NO ONE CAN STOP ME!"
"Go! Charge him from the back! Through the building!" yelled the captain. Several officers go into the building and (pass up the elevator) climb up the stairs.
"MUHAHAHAHAHA -ah?" Goku turns around, and sees several cops come through the door leading to the roof,"Damn, they're fast...Oh, well. I guess I gotta...," Goku looks down, and only sees a one way trip to pancake-ism,"...Shit."
"GET HIM!" yelled an officer, and all of the cops charged at Goku.
"NOOOO! Chinese cuisine, why have you betrayed meeeee!" yelped Goku as the cops placed hand-cuffs on the monkey's wrists.
"You have the right to be silent," said one officer, as he made Goku walk back down the stairs.
"NEVER! I'll talk as much as I want to! LALALALALALALA! MOOOOOOO! CHIFFLIGUM!...Okay, I'm done."
With Gojyo. He was still being chased,"DAMN YOU AAAAALL!" he screamed. Suddenly, a police car drove in back of Gojyo, and in front of the angry drunken women.
"Thank GOD!" Gojyo said as the cop got out of his car, and started asking the women questions. The cop walks up to Gojyo,"So, um, I can go now, right?"
"You're under arrest," said the police officer, as he placed hand-cuffs on Gojyo's wrists.
"WHAT! WHY!"
"These women claim you were sexually assaulting them."
"Bullshit! It's vice-versa, you moron! Besides, if I was sexually assaulting them, why would they be chasing me!" Gojyo roared.
"Look, pal, do wanna get tazered?" said the officer, as he reached for something in his belt.
"Um, no...Hey, how can I be talking to you right now?"
"Just get in the car," with that, Gojyo was shoved in the back seat.
With Hakkai. He was still driving along the streets, on the wrong side of the road, being chased by the NYPD. He turns on the radio,"BREAKING NEWS!" screamed the voice coming from the radio,"Two of the three possibly insane asian males have been arrested! They are being taken in as I speak for questioning."
"Oh? Is that so?" asked Hakkai,"Oh, well...It was fun while it lasted."
Hakkai slams on his brakes, causing almost all of the police cars to vear off the road to avoid him. One car drives up to Hakkai's side of the jeep,"You realize you're going in for questioning now, right?" asked the officer.
"Um...I don't speak your language, sir," answered Hakkai, smiling.
"Oh? A wise crack, is it?" the officer gets out and drags Hakkai out of his jeep. He places hand-cuffs on Hakkai's wrists,"You're under arrest."
"Oh? Come on, Hakuryu!" Hakkai's jeep turns back into his dragon, and rests on his shoulder.
"Damn Japanese and their technologically advanced cars," mumbled the cop, as he sat Hakkai down in the back seat of the car. He sarted to drive towards what Hakkai could only assume was the police station. The cop said something into his walkie-talkie thing.
On the radio,"More breaking news! The third and last of the possibly dangerous asian males has been placed under arrest. Now, attempts will be made to repair the damages these three terrorists have caused."
"Damn it!" yelled Sanzo as he continued to run down the streets,"Where the hell is the freakin' Police Station!" he runs into a flight of stairs and falls over. He looks up from the ground and sees he ran into, non other than, the Police Station steps,"Well, that's lucky...," he gets up and walks in the doors.
Inside, the police are conducting an interogation with the three "terrorists". They are in a small room with one light shining on the three. Hakkai is in the middle, fingers interlaced and smiling with Hakuryu on his shoulder. Gojyo is to his left, checking out the female guard guarding the door. Goku was on Hakkai's right, ducking under the table now and then to munch on the food he snuck in.
"What are your names?" asked the officer.
"We can't speak your language, sir," said Hakkai politly.
"What is your nationality?"
"Um, didn't you hear me...?"
"What is your reason for terrorising the city today? Were you sent on a mission to do so from your native country? Is this a declaration of war?"
"Huh...? I CAN'T SPEAK YOUR LANGUAGE, sir," Hakkai said each sylable as though speaking to a child learning to speak.
"What is-" the officer started.
"What the fuck's wrong with you!" yelled Gojyo,"Get a translator in here or something!"
"They're not cooperating," the investigator whispered to the guard; which was pretty pointless, because the boys don't understand them,"Go get someone in here who can speak oriental."
"Sir," the female guard said,"Oriental is a type of food. They are Asian."
"Fine, fine, whatever, just get someone."
The guard nods and turns to open the door. And just as the door is wide enough to let the girl through- "ATTENTION, ALL AMERICANS WITHIN THE VICINITY!" yelled a voice that sounded as though on a mega-phone.
"The hell is that!" yelled the officer,"Get the boys and lead them out of here;can't have them alone for one second," he ordered, then he ran out the door, toward the voice. The guard walks to the boys and re-hand-cuffs them. She leads them out, also toward the voice.
"Oi, Hakkai," Goku whispered with difficulty; he had to stuff the remainder of his food into his mouth so the guard wouldn't see it.
"Nani?" answered Hakkai (this conversation is from the guard's point of view; trying to use as much Japanese as possible xD). The guard couldn't understand what the young man asked the elder, but for some reason thought it had to do with "Sanzo's voice", whatever that meant.
As it turns out, the voice was coming from the front desk, where a blonde asian man held the officer at the front desk at gun-point, while standing on the desk. He spoke into the mega-phone he had,"GOOD TO SEE YOU HAVE MY FRIENDS WITH YOU!" his voice echoed.
"Since when does Sanzo speak English?" Gojyo asked Hakkai.
"What do you want!" asked the interogator, also at gun point (how many guns does Sanzo have; or, how many arms...?)
"IT WOULD BE MUCH APRECIATED IF YOU LET MY FRIENDS GO!" answered the blonde man.
"What! These men are under arrest for disturbing the peace of New York!" yelled the officer at the front desk.
"There was peace here?" whispered Goku to the other two.
"YES, BUT, BY LAW, YOU HAVE NO AUTHORITY TO ARREST THEM, AND THEY HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO WHATEVER THE HELL THEY WANT!"
"What! Why is that!" asked the female guard.
"INCASE YOU HAVEN'T NOTICED, THESE BOYS ARE OF ASIAN DECENT. YES, ASIANS RECIDE IN AMERICA, BUT THOSE ASIANS HAVE, WHAT I CALL, "PAPERS". THESE BOYS, IN ESSENCE, HAVE NO "PAPERS", AND ARE TECHNICALLY ILLEGAL IMMAGRINTS, OR TOURISTS, AS SOME CALL THEM. YOU CANNOT ARREST TOURISTS FROM OTHER COUNTRIES, ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY DO NOT KNOW THE LAWS OF THIS COUNTRY!"
"Yeah, but...shit, he's right," cursed the interogator.
"SO, LET MY PEOPLE GO! IF YOU DON'T, AFTER ALL, THAT WOULD BE A "HATE CRIME". AND THAT'S BAD PUBLICITY. AND PUBLICITY IS THE ONLY THING IN THIS COUNTRY!"
And, so the boys were freed, the paparazzi was silenced, and the four drove off into the sunset in their "damn technalogically advanced car".
The End...?
Yeah! End to the New York saga! Thanx to my friend Okami and her splendid ideas for this chapter!
Next time, the boys vs. The Annoying Elevator! (idea brought to you by: My friend Sango via birthday card!)
