Disclaimer: Unfortunately i own nothing.

Summery: Back at Privet Driver Harry finds he has Hermione's diaries. On reading them he finds out more about his best friend then he ever thought, so much so that he realises that she is always by his side...H/Hr

Discovery

The Forbidden Fruit


Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have read Hermione's diaries but when Harry had found her wooden chest at the bottom of his trunk when he unpacked at Private Drive that summer he thought he had been given the opportunity of a life time.

For Hermione's 16th birthday Harry and Ron had clubbed together to buy the chest for her. She had seen it in Scrivensafts and fallen in love with it immediately alsoit had the Hogwarts emblem emblazoned on the top and a small mirror on the inside of the lid. The box was split up into seven separate compartments in which Hermione put her diary for each year at Hogwarts.

How did it get there was the first thing Harry thought when he first saw it sitting in the base of his trunk. That was one mystery he couldn't fathom out. All he and Ron had ever known about what Hermione had put in the chest was her diaries and since then the boys had been naturally curious as to what Hermione wrote in them.

As soon as possible though the chest was whisked up the girls' staircase and they had deemed it unreachable and forgotten about it but now Harry held the forbidden fruit, so to speak, in his hands and he couldn't wait to tell Ron. Of course he had to have a little peak. What could Hermione write that Harry didn't know about? He'd been with her through all their adventures and he was the one that knew her the best. Sure girls wrote about who they fancied and period dates and stuff…yuck bad thoughts! Harry cringed…did not want to think about that! Anyway Hermione didn't fancy anyone so what could she possible write about that she wouldn't allow the boys to see?

On further investigation of the content within, Harry found he couldn't tell Ron about his find not when he had found exactly what Hermione had written about…

He knew he shouldn't be reading the entries but it was addictive he couldn't stop. They were like a really good book he couldn't put down. He was finally allowed to see or read in this case what went on in Hermione's mind and found out more than he could ever imagine about his best female friend…

Several entries sticking out in his mind:

1st September 1998

Today I started Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry! Apparently it's the best school there is and so I am extremely honoured to be here and to be a witch for that matter.

On the train ride down I met several new people. There was a boy named Neville Longbottom and I helped find his toad Trevor. Then I met two more boys called Ronald Weasley and Harry Potter. Yes the very same Harry Potter I've read about over the summer. I guess he's just as scared and nervous as I am about starting tomorrow not knowing anything about the wizarding world and growing up in our world. There were three nasty boys but I didn't catch their names and I don't think I want to really.

I tried to read as mush as possible so I won't be behind but I'm not sure it will be enough. I'm going to check out some books tomorrow from the amazing library they have here.

I'm kind of scared about tomorrow and not knowing anyone. I hope I make some friendsas I've seen quite a few girls here who I could make friends with.

I'm just afraid though what if I can't do it, the magic? What if I don't know anything and they make me leave? I'm in such a magical place I don't want to go.

I'm going to bed now; classes start tomorrow,

Hermione

X

Harry gave a small grin at the young Hermione. She'd always been so confident Harry had never thought for a minute that she was scared and had the same fears he had about starting school in a completely different world.

31st October 1998

Things with Harry and Ron have reached their peak today. I give in I'm not going to bother them anymore or even help them.

We had left the Charms lesson today and I over heard Ron saying how annoying I was and that I had no friends.

I know I have no friends and I just ignore it but to have it throw in my face like that really hurt and Harry just laughed and agreed with him!

I want to go home, I hate it here and I'm absolutely miserable!

Everyone is going to be coming back from lessons now before an amazing Halloween feast I suspect but I don't feel very hungry and I'm not going to go down there and eat if they're there! Lavender and Parvati will be here in a minute and I don't want them to see me like this, like they'd care anyway. I'll just go and hide in the toilets until dinners over and everyone's returned so I wont be bothered. Like anyone would miss me.

Bye

X

"I'm so sorry," Harry whispered.

He recalled all to clearly what happened that day and a fresh wave of guilt washed over him that he had buried years ago. All she'd ever done for him so far was to try and keep him out of trouble and all he did was throw it back in her face. She had been miserable ever since starting school and Harry and Ron had just made it worse...

Their joining in friendship had obviously made Hermione happier. He was sure he owed Hermione so much with all that she'd done for him over the years, homework, Quidditch and saving his life. If it wasn't for half the things Hermione had done Harry would be dead he was sure of it.

1999

Malfoy called me a Moodblood today. I didn't know what it meant at first until Ron and Hagrid explained it to me. I feel that there is an invisible barrier barring me from a world I've grown to love just because of my bloodline. It's like there is some sort of divide between the boys and myself but Ron tried to curse Malfoy with his broken wand but unfortunately the spell backfired and he ended up cursing himself to burp up slugs…


I'm worried about Harry. Everyone thinks he's the Heir of Slytherin. I think that's ridicules…


Another person was petrified today Justin Finch Fletchley and Nick the Gryffindor house ghost. I'm really scared, as it's just the muggleborns being attacked. I darent say anything to Harry or Ron though. It's just something I don't feel I can share with them...


2000

… … …Harry just sits there and either agrees with Ron or stays out of the argument. He's never stuck up for me in our arguments before I mean I know Ron is his best friend but it would be nice for him to just once stick up for me. He's never thanked me for anything before either. Everything I've done to help him and I don't get those two words of appreciation a little thank you would suffice every now and again. I just feel so worthless, like no one would even notice if Sirius Black attacked me until there was no one to answer questions in class…


It's Christmas Day today and I've just had a huge row with the boys. I think Harry's broomstick that he got for Christmas is from Sirius Black jinxed perhaps to some how hurt him and I told McGonagall and now the guys hate me because it's going to be stripped down something or other. I was only looking out for his safety but NO anything 'Hermione' does is always to hurt him or deprive him of something never in his best interests! It doesn't help with Ron fuelling his fire...


I've just got back from the library. Malfoy was there and he must have noticed the 'Trio's Split' as he put it. He said some really hurtful things to me and I couldn't just brush them off as usual because I didn't have Ron and Harry with me. What was the worst, was what Malfoy said was true, it is MY fault they're not talking to me, it is MY fault they hate me. I've been really depressed these past few weeks. I'm working ALL the time just to get my work done and barely sleeping properly. I don't think I can manage the time turner any more…
Harry got his broomstick back today and came over to talk to me for the first time in ages! Then an argument happened all over again because Ron thinks Scabbers is dead. There was blood on his sheets and there were some of Crookshanks' hairs but they could have been there since Christmas time…couldn't they? And of course Harry sided with Ron- again!
Harry came over and talked to me today he had the nerve to ask if I had even gone to his Quidditch match, like I'd miss anything he did however angry I was. I don't know that if he still hates me or not but Ron does he made that quiet clear! I've been helping Hagrid with his case for Buckbeak's trial and we're progressing steadily…
I made up with Ron and Harry today! It's been almost two months since we've been on friendly terms and I feel so happy! I can't believe how I managed without them. I missed them so much, more than I'd ever tell them though…

Harry really wanted to talk to Hermione. Explain how sorry he was for taking her for granted to tell her thank you over and over again and ask for forgiveness for how he'd treated her for the past few years. It dawned on Harry how important she was to him how integral she was to 'The Trio' she was the brains behind everything with Harry getting all the credit. She was appreciated although he never told her. He had the urge to get in touch with her right now and thank her and make sure she still didn't feel like that.

He finished her third diary and placed it back in the chest before laying back down on his bed staring at the ceiling. He had to do something, anything, a big over blow gesture to express his gratitude.

Just thinking about Hermione and her feelings pulled at his heartstrings and he felt guilty. He had overwhelming urge to hold her, comfort her, she wasn't as strong as she made out to be and more than ever he wanted to return back to Hogwarts and see her, even if he was taken to Grimmuld Place he hoped she would be there.

Harry made a mental to thank Hermione everytime she did something for him from now on.

2001

I've fallen for Harry. There I've written it I can't take it back. It's scary and amazing at the same time I mean he's my best friend and he's suffered so much but I'm afraid I've fallen so hard I can't get back up again especially if he knocks me back. I can't describe the feelings that erupt in me each time I see him or when I hug him…

Harry froze… me? …Me? She's fallen for me? Hermione loves me? Unconsciously he smiled which steadily turned into a grin, a grin that lit up his whole face. But what do I feel for her? Harry spent the next hour and a half contemplating his feelings for his bookworm friend before coming to a decision he had realised long ago it was simple: 15 letters, 5 words, one heart swelling meaning...I'm in love with her.

He recognised it now; the fuzzy feeling he always got when she hugged him. The tingling sensation he felt when she had kissed him on the cheek 3 years ago and the suffocating realisation in the Department of Mysteries when she was struck down he was unable to move drowning in terror. What if I had lost her was a continuous phrase that plagued his mind for the whole year after. How he was jealous of Cole Smith last year without realising it, he remembered glaring at him occasionally and stiffened considerably when he and Hermione had come over to talk to him. How he always protected her first before himself, from the centaurs and Grawp in the forest to trying to keep Hermione from coming with him to London, telling her to stay behind to wait for the Thestrels with the others.

Harry couldn't believe it, he had been in love with her too but never realised it. With this new comprehension Harry was even more wishing to go back to school and see her again and a week later his wish was answered.

Several Order members came to collect him, scaring the living daylights out of the Dursley's especially Dudley. He seemed to be suffering from some sort of complex to Magic folk. Well after his disastrous encounter with Hagrid and The Weasley twins who could blame him.


"After everything that happened at the end of last year, the media attention and Umbridge prowling round the school after Harry I just need to be there for him. It's getting him down I can tell and he's not sleeping properly. I need somehow to tell him I'll always be here."
He had entered his room hot and sweaty from the vicious Quidditch match he had just been in with the Weasley boys (bar Percy) and there she was...sat on his bed reading a huge tome. In total shock at her sudden arrival he stood speechless taking in every aspect of her. How her tongue peaked out through her luscious lips while she was concentrating, and how that mouth, that tongue seemed so delectable. Feeling his presence she glanced up and broke into a huge grin.

"Harry," she squealed and jumped of his bed and flung her arms around him holding him tightly, "I've missed you so much... how have you been?"

"I've been fine. Even better now that your here," he grinned relishing in the feeling of Hermione in his arms, "what about you?"

"I've had a great holiday thanks... oh before I forget, I've already asked Ron but he didn't know, do you remember me leaving my Scrivenshfts chest on the train? Because I can't find it."

Harry immediately panicked and stiffened but, still in his arms, Hermione didn't seem to notice.

"No I don't think so why?"

"Nothing, it doesn't matter," she grinned up at him, "I think you better go and get a shower Mr Potter because, no offence, but you stink... And eurgh you're all sweaty let me go."

Harry grinned evilly and pulled her closer, "you know I find that insulting Granger, you saying that I smell?"

"Well you do, now let me go... Ew Harry give over," Hermione exclaimed struggling against Harry's iron grip.

Harry chuckled causing Hermione to freeze in his arms and gaze up at him.

"What?" he asked confused.

"N-nothing, Harry I've got to go, I'll talk to you later ok," and with that she managed to slip form Harry's grasp.

Harry watched her go confused. What was all that about?


Ron had left them about an hour ago with the twins but Harry had continued to work steadily on with his holiday homework while Hermione read. Finally she stood up, "I'm pretty tired you don't mind if I go up do you? All you need to do is write down that Evaluation on the end of the changes I made for you ok?"

Harry nodded and watched her gather her belongings.

"Well wait up I'll come with you, I'll finish this tomorrow."

"But Harry we're going to school tomorrow, you won't have time. You see this is what you get for leaving it till the last minute," she sighed in exasperation.

Harry just chuckled and gathered his own things while she waited for him patiently.

"Thank you... by the way."

Hermione froze, "what did you say?" She whispered.

Harry grinned slightly and took a step towards her.

"I said thank you… as in thank you for helping me with my essay tonight the night before school when I guess you probably had some more important things to be doing… why?"

Harry noticed her eyes flash with gratitude he'd never seen before and a small smile grace her lips.

"No reason."

They ascended up the three flights to their bedrooms in silence until Hermione bid Harry goodnight at her bedroom door.

"'Night Harry."

"'Night 'Mione."

She graced him once again with a small smile he'd grown to love without realising it, before she entered her room. A smile that lit up her whole face and one he hated to see her without, it looked like something was missing if it wasn't there which made his heart beat wildly. He recognised it as the smile she reserved for him, just for him, and it made him giddy with excitement. Harry waited several seconds before entering the room he was sharing with Ron.

As soon as he entered hepulled out a piece of parchment from the desk in the room and waited. Predictable Hermione's neat scripture graced the page. It was the first time he'd used this and was so glad it worked…

You won't believe what just happened because I can hardly believe it myself! OK you know I'm making a big deal out of it never mind.

There was a pause and Harry thought she wouldn't continue and was about to put the parchment away until…

Ok I will have to make a note of this so I have written evidence. I was helping Harry with his potions essay downstairs and he thanked me when we were finished. It was really…sweet of him oh gosh those stupid feelings are returning. Ever since I first saw him after the holidays they came back! When we were in his room together when I first got here they came back so unexpectedly... I thought they'd gone! It was easy burying them because I wouldn't be seeing him for almost two months but…well…I don't know what to feel.

Well I'm going to bed now we're going back to Hogwarts tomorrow.

Bye

X

Half an hour later Harry was still staring at the words on the page when suddenly he heard the doorknob turning and he hastily stuffed the parchment in the draw on the desk.

Ron entered.

It wasn't long after that both boys got into bed and fell asleep, Harry dreaming of a certain brown haired girl.


"Morning boys," Called a voice vaguely familiar before Harry felt a giant pounce on his bed.

"Grrr" he groaned, "'Mione!"

Hermione giggled and leapt from the bed and Harry heard another muffled groan, "Wake up Ronnikins School starts today," She sang.

"Bugger off 'Mione." Growled Ron making Hermione giggle even harder.

Harry still with his eyes closed heard the unmistakable sound of a yelp and a thud. He rolled over to see Hermione on the floor and Ron was now the one chuckling to himself.

"Serves you right," was all Ron said before collapsing on his bed closing his eyes. Hermione glared up at his sleeping form indignantly.

"Idiot," she grumbled.

Harry leaned over and offered Hermione his hand, which she accepted and pulled her up, onto his bed.

"You know Ron's grumpy in a morning," laughed Harry, "you set out to hurt yourself with that one," he smiled.

She grinned back and shrugged, "I guess."

Harry consciously noticed he still had hold of Hermione's hand and howitfit perfectlyin his.

"I mean I should know by now after seven years...gosh I can't believe it's been that long, can you? When you were a scrawny little first year."

Harry shook his head and flashed her a smile, "so much has happened since then."

Hermione noticed Harry's eyes cloud over darkly, "hey", she whispered touching his shoulder to snap his attention away from the thoughts she knew he was forming. She knew Harry better than he knew himself.

He glanced at her a dark mist swirling in his eyes of pain and sorrow. She found herself marvelling at how at just 17 Harry looked so grown up, so mature, more so, than he should be, his eyes were like windows to his experiences. Having a deranged murderer after him for most of his life and living a maltreated existence at the hands of his relatives caused Harry to act much older than he really was and it hurt Hermione to know that. She felt his pain and sorrows but also his joys and triumphs. Sirius' death hit him hard as he was the only father figure that he had including one of his links back to his parents. She knew he was living in constant fear of her or Ron being taken by Voldemort or any other person close to him just for that fact... that they were close to him. She'd noticed the pattern of Voldemort using those close to Harry to try and destroy him. But Hermione wasn't going to let that happen, she would be with him till the end, she would suffer anything just so that this holocaust could be over and he could live the life he should lead.

She leaned over and gave him a brief hug but she felt him cling to her in desperation.

"Everything's going to be fine," she whispered in his ear, "I won't leave you."

Harry just nodded. She didn't know about the prophecy "kill or be killed". Harry had carried it around with him for a year. He didn't want to frighten her and the love he felt for his friends in two very different ways was what was going to kill Voldemort. He was going to kill him so that they didn't have to live in fear. If this is the design, his fate, the reason he was born, to kill a power hungry fiend and possibly die in the process, that's what he would do especially for her, the girl in his arms.

She drew back, Harry notice a rush of cold air sweep over him at the loss of contact from Hermione's body, "well my mission was to wake you two up and now I've accomplished that I'm going to get ready, see you later."

She stood up from the bed, Harry's hand stillclasped in hers andgave it a gentle squeeze before slowly withdrawing it as she walked from his bed out of the room.


"Harry can I borrow a quill you haven't packed yet?" Harry looked up from his bed where he was finishing some last minute packing to see Hermione standing in the doorway.

"Sure there's one in that draw." He replied before returning to what he was doing.

"Thanks, this one?"

"Yeah"

"It's just I've packed all mine and my trunk is downstairs I thought what are the odds you haven't packed yours yet?" she smiled.

Harry glanced up and shook his head at her comment, "am I really that predictable?" he asked.

Hermione giggled and started rummaging round the draw.

A long silence made Harry glance up again to see Hermione staring at something in the draw and realisation dawned on which draw she was looking in and Harry felt as thought a bucket of cold water had just been thrown over him.

"Wait!"

But it was too late… "Harry? What's this?" She asked pulling out the piece of parchment he used the coping charm on from Hermione's diary.