On the other side of the well, Kagome sat on its rim gasping as hot tears spilled down her flushed cheeks, her knuckles whitened as she gripped the hard stone edge.  She sat in darkness, not sure if she wanted to face the light of day, not with the mood she was in. 

Why do I always let Inu Yasha do this to me?  We could be arguing over something little and it eventually blows up into an all out war.  I don't know what comes over me or him for that manner.  He pushes me away then won't allow me to leave him alone.  Who am I kidding?  I don't want to leave him alone either.  I think it's starting to wear on me.  I know we can't be a real couple ever but it hurts because I want to so much. 

Kagome slipped down from Bone Eater's well to the ground waiting below.  Pressing her cheek to the cold stone, she sobbed.  I hurt deep down inside because I know no matter how long I wait, he won't turn to me and say that he chooses to stay with me.  I don't want him to die.  I don't want to him to leave me alone.  It's not fair.  I guess it is true that I can't compete with Kikyo because I'm alive.  Does he not see that just because I'm alive doesn't mean I don't suffer too?  Nowadays, I can't even get him to look me straight in the eyes.  It seems as if he almost flinches from my touch. 

Here I am… a 17-year-old schoolgirl with a dual life as a warrior miko in feudal Japan.  I am in love with a half demon whose heart belongs to a zombie.  I am quite pitiful; I have never been kissed, I been almost killed, kicked, choked, and damn near everything else.  Now here I am crying, as usual, over a stupid argument with a pig headed hanyou.  Why do I do this to myself?  Why do I complicate my life more than necessary?  I should be studying for entrance exams to college but instead I go running through ancient times trying to recover shards of the Shikon no Tama, a jewel that will sever me completely from my first and only love when it is complete. I should walk away from this well and never come back, cut my losses a bit.  I should do so many things… but in the end, I know will be by his side until the very end.  My heart is on the other side of that well and no matter how beaten and battered it gets I want to be there.  I cannot help myself. 

Kagome straightened up a bit and wiped her eyes hastily.  She then noticed that her hands were sore and tingling.  Sighing, she pushed herself off the ground and walked out of the well house.  She was shocked to see tinges of pink in the sky, signifying the beginning of a sunset. 

"Just how long was I in there?" Kagome questioned herself before looking down at her hands once more.  They were bloody and more than a bit raw.  At first sight, she panicked.  Whose blood is this?  Is it Inu Yasha's?  No, it couldn't be…  I didn't draw blood when I hit him.  At least, I don't think I did. 

Kagome's chocolate brown eyes widened, "I hit him.  I hit him in the face and then I…  I forgot I could do that…  I haven't used that kind of power since I first got dragged through the well by Mistress Centipede."  Tears filled Kagome's reddened eyes once again, "It'll be a wonder if he doesn't hate me forever for that.  I didn't mean to… I was just so angry and… the words I said.  I was so harsh…  After that I know he won't come for me."

Kagome looked back in the direction of the well, "I just know he won't come…" that hurt her even more.   To think that Inu Yasha wouldn't even come to yell at her made her heart sink in her chest.  Her tear-blurred eyes strained to see if anyone would come through the doors of the shed housing the well.  She stood for what seemed like hours.  By the time she moved, the setting sun illuminated the shrine grounds in hues of deep pink and gold.  Even as the tears spilled, she tried to shrug it off.  I will just go back in a few days and apologize to him.  He can't stay mad forever and perhaps I won't even have to go back and apologize.  Maybe he's being his usual stubborn self.  Perhaps he will drop by later… probably not.  I_

Her thoughts stopped short as she heard something shuffle behind her.  She turned abruptly at the sound; tears glittered in her wake, she was ready to bolt into the arms of her beloved hanyou.  Had Inu Yasha seen her face of ecstatic joy, his resolve would have melted instantly. 

"Inu_!" Kagome's cry ended as she realized that there was no half demon waiting behind her.  It was Buyo, her beloved housecat.  She face faulted and then her lips sagged into a frown.  The cat wrapped about her legs, purring softly.

 "Oh Buyo… at least you love me."  Kagome scooped the housecat into her arms and snuggled into its warm fur, wiping her tears as she did so. Buyo playfully swatted at Kagome's bedraggled obsidian locks and purr of content rumbled in her chest, as if to comfort her master. The girl's tears were half from self-deprecating laughter at her own folly and the other half sorrow because the one she wished to see the most was nowhere to be found.  Kagome sighed deeply as she proceeded towards her house with a heavy and troubled heart.

"Hello!   Is anyone home?" Kagome stepped through the front door hoping to be greeted by her family. "Jii-chan...?  Souta...?"  There was no answer to her call.  After taking off her shoes and dropping her yellow bag, the young miko walked into her kitchen searching for some sign of life or explanation for her family's disappearance.  There she found a note on the refrigerator door addressed to her.

Kagome dearest,

I knew you were supposed to return this morning and we waited as long as we could.  I am not even sure you will get this note and probably am just rambling on to myself.  I am sure you're off in Sengoku Jidai fighting some force of evil or another.  Anyways, my daughter, if you do get this message please call me at your Auntie Aya's house at the hot springs.  There are pickled vegetables in the refrigerator and some leftovers from a hotpot I made yesterday for dinner.  As usual, the cupboards are stocked to the brim with ramen for your cute eared demon friend, Inu Yasha.  I made a point to go get more supplies for your med kit and I think there is some chocolate in the cupboard as well.  I know how much your friends like it.  Remember that Souta and I will be back in four days.  Your jii-chan is off on his journey to visit shrines.  Who knows how long he will be away.  I am hoping that he will return long before I do just in case you are home.  Souta says he misses you.

Love,

Mama

I wanted to go to the hot springs…  If I hadn't spent most of the day fighting with Inu Yasha, I would have made it back in time. What can I do it about now?  It would have been nice though…  Now, I'm stuck here by myself.  Mama, I wanted to talk to you so badly.  Maybe you could have given me advice.   I need it so much now…  Kagome crumpled the note in her hand as a wave of anguish overtook her.  I'm alone… always so alone… 

 Kagome straightened as sudden rush of disgust at her own weakness came over her, "Shape up Higurashi!  When have you ever been this pitiful!  Never, that's when!   I refuse to mope around like a big baby.   No, not this girl…  What I need is a long hot bath and then a nice long bout of studying.  Nothing like math to take my mind off my sorrows…  Umm yeah…  I think I will take a nap after that bath and then study.  Tomorrow is a school day and I fully plan on attending.  Mama and Souta should be back by Sunday.  That gives me plenty of time to get my life and my head together."   With that having been said, the young girl marched into the bathroom, Buyo in tow. 

Kagome stared into slightly foggy bathroom mirror as her bath water ran.  Her eyes were red and had shadows underneath them.  She saw a haggard and sad face, topped off with the most horrible hair she'd ever seen.  Shaking her head, she smeared the condensation on the mirror, distorting the image.  I need to take better care of myself.  Crying so much does no good for me.  I look like an undead zombie.  If I were, perhaps Inu Yasha would like me better.  Where the heck did that come from?!  I will not think of him now.  I have more important things to do right now.  Jewel Shards are the last things on my mind. This is perfect time to relax without that hanyou down my throat.  Kagome frowned unconsciously; her brain would not purge her thoughts of the half dog demon.   I hope he comes for me. He's probably really pissed at me right now.  I hope we can work through this.  I really don't mean to be jealous; it isn't something I can help.  Well, maybe I can suppress it most of the time.  He just makes me so mad and then all the feelings I hold in slip out.  I guess I shouldn't be holding them in.  The results are never pretty.  I could seriously hurt someone if I am not careful. I guess I should talk to Kaede about that before I get out of control or something.  Enough thinking for now, it is bath time. 

She shed all her clothes except for a necklace consisting of Shikon shards she and the gang collected in their travels, she frequently wore the shards about her neck nowadays because in the past she often ended leaving her bag in random and unsafe places.  Kagome gingerly stepped into the hot bath water.  After her body properly adjusted to the temperature, she sank down into the water, letting her thoughts drift off into pleasant nothingness. 

"Ahhhh… the things you just can't get in feudal Japan." Kagome sighed softly, before her lids lowered until her long sable eyelashes kissed her heat flushed cheeks.  Beside the bathtub, Buyo curled into a fuzzy ball, the calico cat decided it would take its mistress' lead and rest.      

A half an hour later, Kagome awoke in lukewarm water, "I guess I am really tired.  Let me hurry up and get out of here before I mistakenly drown myself."  With that being said, she proceeded to wash her hair and dumped almost a whole bottle of conditioner in it.  My hair has suffered too much abuse since I started traveling to Sengoku Jidai. I haven't been able to treat it properly for at least a month.  Kagome reached up to touch her slimy, conditioner covered locks.  Perhaps I went a little crazy with the conditioner. 

Rinsing clean, she got out of the tub, pulled on a robe, and toweled her hair dry.  I feel a little better now.  What a difference a bath makes. Now I think I really need to take a nap before I collapse.  That little catnap in the bathroom was no way near enough sleep. 

She walked upstairs to room, closing the door behind her but reopened it once she heard the mewling and scratching of her faithful Buyo. 

"Oh Buyo," Kagome sighed.  "Why can't Inu Yasha be as sweet as you?  You never complain or raise hell.  Then again, you are just a cat.  I bet if you could talk, you'd have a million things to complain about."

After changing into a blue tank top and matching pajama shorts, Kagome flopped down unto her pink bedspread.  Her body wanted desperately to rest but her mind still reeled.  Looking down at her chest she gripped the Shikon necklace that lie on her bosom, it twinkled a little despite the lack of light.  To think it all began with this.  Because of this jewel I met Inu Yasha and the gang.  Oh, Inu Yasha… I wish I could just stop thinking about him, but I can't.  She flipped onto her back, her eyes focused on the ceiling above her.  What is it about him that I like so much, anyway?  He is pigheaded, rude, obnoxious, violent, oblivious, blockheaded, and a jerk…  I swear the first time I met him; he insulted me and then later on tried to kill me.  What kind of girl in her right mind likes a guy like that?  A crazy one that's who…  Well, I guess I am insulting myself now… Then again, I am sure I am crazy because I really do love him despite his flaws.  It's those times when he smiles at me.  Though they are rare, his smiles are special because I know they are genuine.  It's the way he gets all flustered when I cry and then at the same time can face down a powerful demon without so much as blinking. I know that under that layer of roughness is his true nature, a nature he doesn't want anyone to see.  Sometimes, he can be a compassionate, shy, and caring guy. I love him because I know that deep down inside he means well.  At least, I used to think he meant well.  Nowadays, I'm not so certain.  He says such hurtful things and while I usually can give back as good or bad as I get, I can't help but take his words to heart.

 It gets worse because some of my hurt stems from my jealousy at his feelings for Kikyo.  When he's with her, there is this aura around them like they just want to embrace. It's hard to accept because I wish it were me he looks at like that.   Why do I always have to witness these events? I watched him make vows of love to her for kami's sake. I would be much better off if I was oblivious to what was going on. Maybe I would be able to believe I have half a chance with him. Of course, I always have to be in the wrong place at the wrong time.  I feel like a fool sometimes because I chose this path.  I should have backed off when I realized that he was still very much in love with Kikyo.  I can't really blame myself.  I didn't even understand what I was feeling until the first time I saw them together.  It felt like my heart was being ripped out and I was powerless to control it.  I can't stop myself from loving and my heart is set on loving Inu Yasha. My first love…  It had to be him.       

Before Inu Yasha, I never even thought of falling in love.  I was in junior high school.  All that mattered back then was my family, my friends, and school.  I was oblivious to boys.  I mean I talked about them with my friends and even had a little crush once or twice, but nothing serious.  Guys go for the super pretty and popular girls. I had no reason to believe even if I did really like some guy, he would notice.  I'm just a regular girl, no glitz or glamour.  Well at least I thought I was regular girl until I fell into a well, ended up in feudal Japan, and found out I was the reincarnation of a dead miko. That's when my life became a complicated tangled mess.  If someone had told me from the beginning that I would fall in love with a hanyou, I would have laughed my head straight off.  In the beginning, it seemed impossible.  After spending so much time with him, I began to see him in a new light.  As we traveled together, I found out so much about his mysterious past and his true feelings.  While he often pretended not to care about anything, I could tell when his heart or his mind was afflicted. I knew then that he wasn't just a baka… I learned that Inu Yasha was an orphaned boy who had to grow up fast in a harsh world that could not accept him for being a hanyou. He lost everyone important to him:  his mother, his father, and Kikyo.  I wanted to befriend him; I didn't want him to be alone anymore.  I don't think I could ever just turn my back on Inu Yasha.  What kind of friend would I be to him if I did?  He needs someone to trust.  So here I am.  Forever trying to be the best friend I can be and pretend like I am not in love with him. 

I do not want to argue but he can be so callous.  Today was the worst argument I ever had with him.  He called me weak and clumsy.  He basically implied that I was nothing compared to Kikyo.  How could he say that?  It's no wonder I didn't pick up a bow and arrow and shoot him right in his head. I'm glad I didn't. My temper can get the best of me sometimes.  I am not sure if he was serious or just being mean, but when he said those things my heart just stopped beating.  I felt like someone had just slapped me in the face or dumped cold water straight on my head.  It took all my strength not to cry like a big baby.  If words could kill, I am sure I would have dropped dead on the spot.  Kagome sighed heavily; her eyelids were beginning to droop from fatigue.  I understand that Inu Yasha still loves Kikyo.  It's something I learned to accept if I want to hang around and complete this mission but why must things between us be so painful?  Why can't we just laugh and smile. The circumstances that bind us together are dark and heavy enough.  We do get along sometimes and then, we eventually end up arguing.  Usually, we fight about nothing important.  It's just manifestations of the complications that we have in our 'relationship'.  I never said that I love him because I'm scared he will reject me. While I have come to terms my own emotions, I still don't have the faintest idea of what he's feeling. I wonder when he looks at me; does he see who I am?  Does he see me at all or does he imagine I'm Kikyo until I say or do something that Kikyo wouldn't do? I know how he feels about Kikyo though.  I remember the day Kikyo's remains were taken by the demon Urasue.  He looked at me like he was looking straight into my soul, his eyes so sad and serious.  I think he was trying to find a trace of her.  My heart leapt into my chest when I thought he was going to kiss me as he drew closer, still staring deeply into my eyes.  I don't even think he realized what he was doing or what effect he was having on me.  I believed he hated the dead priestess until that moment.  I envy her because he will never look at me that way.  There are times when I wish I could be Kikyo for just a moment so that I could know what it feels like to have his love.

Nevertheless, I am not Kikyo and will never be her; it's as simple as that.  I hope Inu Yasha can see that.   I hope one day he realizes that I will be beside him come what may…  Our fates… Our lives have been intertwined since the day we first met.  I refuse to fight what I feel and will play out my part until the very end.  In time, maybe Inu Yasha will stop fighting too… With that, Kagome succumbed to the nagging tiredness she was fighting. 

"Inu Yasha…" his name slipped from her lips unconsciously and a single tear ran down her soft cheek.  Even in sleep, she could not escape her torrid emotions.