This was not how I wanted my life to end up at the tender age of 21. Drunk and only partly conscious having a stranger help me to my hotel room. I had gone through off the phases that clearly show 'Kate is drunk'. Using the phrase 'mate' obsessively, adding fuck into every sentence. Saying 'you know what I mean' , and 'I'm not being funny' in a thick scouse accent (I have no idea where it comes from. It's usually very mild). Then there's the biggest give away. Denial.
"I'm not drunk!" I slurred at John as he dragged me out of the lift and down the hall. "I don' even know why you're 'elping me anyway. You don' even know me!"
"Sure I do." John said, propping me up against the wall, then immediately diving to catch me as a slid towards the floor. "You're name is Kate McKeitty."
I laughed, because obvious things are always funny when you're drunk. "I know. Kate McKeitty. You know, if you reversed my first two names I'd be an Olsen twin!"
I laughed again at the notion, but I wasn't too sure John found it funny.
"Ok, I think it's time for bed now. Where's your card key?"
I dug deep down in my jeans and produced my Tesco's club card, god knows what use that would be.
"Kate!"
"It's gone." I said simply, and when he let go I sunk to the floor and stealing the cap off his head in the process. "I'll sleep here."
"In the hall?"
"Indeed."
Then I started laughing again. I can be such a disgrace sometimes. John smiled, only for a second, but I still saw it.
"Come on."
He held his hand out and I took it, but made no move to get up. He pulled hard and I was on my feet.
"You can stay in my room."
John put his arm around my waist and I put my head on his shoulder. The phone in my pocket began to buzz and vibrate and I screamed in shock. The screen was flashing : Home
"'lo."
"Kate?"
"'lo."
"Kate it's Toby."
"'lo Toby. Guess what."
"You're drunk. I know, I can tell."
I giggled and leaned against John so more.
"I've lost me room key! How fuckin thick am I?"
"Very if you've managed to lose your room key."
"Wait. What the fuck are you doing up at six am?"
"Stuff to do." was Toby's simple question, and I was surprised I even remembered there was a whole time zone between us. "Where are you going to sleep?"
"In John's room." I said and gave John a push.
"That was quick. Anyway, call your Mum she's going spare."
I rolled my eyes, when wasn't she. "Right. Will do."
"Not now!" he said quickly. "Call her in the morning."
"Aye aye Cap'tain. Gotta go, love you love you love you, bye."
Then I hung up. John didn't say anything. What can I say, I get very loving when I'm drunk.
By the time we reached John's room, he had to carry me. My legs had begun giving up on regular intervals and I couldn't blame them. Everything had gone hazy and fuzzy, my head seemed too heavy and I was grateful when John put me down on the bed.
"Here's your cap." I mumble, taking it off my head and giving it to him.
"Keep it." John whispered.
"I'm a disgrace." I told him. "A really big fucking disgrace."
"No you're not."
"I am." I whined, almost on the verge of tears. "God, look at me now."
"You're drunk Kate. That's all."
I put my hands over my eyes. "No. It's worse."
John pulled my hands away, and even though he was so close I still couldn't focus. "Just go to sleep. Everything will be alright in the morning. I promise."
I rolled over and shut my eyes, my stomach already feeling as though it was going to reject all that whiskey I had drank. May it was my imagination, or a hallucination, but I swore I heard John say
"You're not a disgrace."
Whatever. I so was.
