"So Close"
by AHGrayLensman

Disclaimer: Evangelion and associated characters are property of Gainax. Please don't sue me for borrowing from it a little.

"Spoken"

'Thought'

/ Mental contact /

Rated R for violence, profanity, mature themes, and some sexual content. Many thanks to faithanne for pre-reading this.


As he had every day for the last week, Shinji arrived at room 303 of the NERV hospital at exactly 3:30pm. He stood outside the closed door for a moment, unsure what to do, just as he had done on the previous six days. He probably would have left after a few minutes of dithering, as he had also done previously, if fate had not intervened.

A middle-aged nurse spotted him, walked up behind him, and tapped him on the shoulder. "Son, are you here to see someone?" she asked.

Shinji jumped slightly at her touch, then turned and looked at the floor in embarrassment. "My roommate is in there, but I'm not sure if she'd want to see me..."

The nurse regarded him with a look of sympathy. "I'm sure she'd want company if she were awake. Nobody has come by to see her since she was brought here, except you. How about I let you in so you can talk to her for a while?"

"...Thank you," Shinji replied hesitantly.

"Let me make sure she's presentable before you go in. I should warn you that she's been in a coma since they brought her here, but the doctors say she could come out of it at any time. I'm sure a visit from a friend like you will help."

'Yeah, I'm such a great friend that I've run away every other time I've come to see her. Not to mention what I did to Toji and Kaworu...'

The nurse went into Asuka's room for a few minutes, then came back out. "You can go in now. I'll close the door so you can have some privacy, but you can hit the call button by the bed any time if you or she needs help."

"Thank you," Shinji said quietly.

"I'll be by in about half an hour to check on you two," the nurse said, closing the door behind her.

Asuka was lying on her side in the room's only bed, facing away from the doorway and dressed in a simple white hospital gown. There was an intravenous tube in her left arm. A rack of electronic devices next to the bed monitored her breathing, heart rate, and brain activity.

She looked like nothing quite so much as Sleeping Beauty. So calm, so peaceful... and so beautiful that it almost hurt to look at her.

Shinji stood next to the bed, feeling as if he should take her hand in his, but fearing what the reprisal would be if he were to do so without her permission. He took a moment to collect his thoughts before starting his confession.

"Asuka, a new pilot named Kaworu came last week. He and I got to be friends... He even said that he loved me - can you believe that? He turned out to be the last Angel though, and I... I killed him. He's the only person who's ever said they loved me, and I killed him!"

"I can't talk to Misato or Rei any more. Misato's become so cold since Kaji died, and Rei... I'm afraid of Rei. She's not the person we knew before Unit-00 self-destructed. I'm not even sure she's really human..."

Shinji was on the verge of tears, leaning on Asuka's shoulder for both physical and emotional support.

"Asuka, please wake up! I need your help. Wake up! Come on, this isn't funny... Wake up! Call me an idiot like you always do! Just... please don't leave me here alone... I need you, Asuka! Please wake up!"

Shinji was standing over Asuka now, shaking her roughly by the shoulder. Without meaning to, he shook her so hard that he rolled her over onto her back, pulling off some of the pads from the medical monitors and spilling her hospital gown open. Confronted by her naked form without threat of repercussion for the first time, Shinji could scarcely help or control what happened next.

Afterward, Shinji stared at the residue of his self-pleasuring on his right hand with a sense of utter disgust and self-loathing.

'I'm so fucked up.'

Fearing the nurse would return and find him in his current state, he hurriedly left the room.

-

Floating somewhere just on the edge of consciousness, Asuka could tell that she was moving by the rush of air past her and the blurry halos of light passing overhead. She could also make out bits and pieces of people talking around her.

"...under attack..."

"...still in a coma...can't sync..."

"...safer...than anywhere else."

'I'm still alive?'

The motion stopped. She was... lifted into a seat? She could feel something warm and viscous flowing over her, smelling of blood.

'LCL? Why am I back in the Eva?'

Time passed. Asuka was surrounded by darkness once again, but she could hear a gentle feminine voice whispering to her.

Asuka dear, it's time to wake up. You have work to do... We have work to do.

Suddenly Asuka was shaken violently, and she could hear the sounds of explosions nearby. She screamed, more terrified than she had ever been in her life.

'I don't want to die.'

/ You're still alive... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ You mustn't die yet... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ You must live... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ I won't let you die... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ I'll protect you... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ You're still alive... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ I won't let you die... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ You must live... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ You mustn't die... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ Please die with me... /

'I don't want to die.'

/ Don't kill her... /

Asuka saw a sudden, terrible vision of herself as a desiccated, worm-ridden corpse.

'I DON'T WANT TO DIE!'

/I'll protect you... I'll always protect you./

Asuka felt a surge of warmth and love, the like of which she hadn't known since...

'Mama! You've been here all along?'

Seemingly in response, the long-slumbering form of Evangelion Unit-02 awoke and spread its AT field, its four eyes blazing.

'Mama!'

Eva Unit-02 rose from the lake that had been hiding it like an avenging angel, roaring in triumph and lifting the warship that had been floating above it with its mighty arms. The ship's keel began to snap under its own weight . Artillery fire from positions along the shore of the lake rained in, and Unit-02 used the ship as a shield and then counter-attacked by tossing the entire ship at them. The ship slammed into the lakefront and collapsed upon itself, igniting its ammunition magazines and obliterating everything within several hundred meters.

Unit-02 leapt out of the water as more missiles and artillery fire began to fall where it had been standing. Asuka willed the massive bio-machine to execute a complex airborne pirouette to dodge the remainder of the incoming projectiles, her face a mix of determination, exhilaration, and pure joy.

'Mama! Now I understand the meaning of the AT field! You've been protecting me all along, always watching over me!'

Unit-02 landed on its feet as a pair of passing bomber aircraft launched gigantic cruise missiles at it. The first missile caught the Eva squarely in the face without detonating, but the Eva managed to block the second by punching through the missile's warhead. The fuel tanks of both missiles then exploded, destroying them but leaving the Eva unscathed.

'We were always together, Mama!'

Further rocket and artillery fired rained in on Unit-02 from tanks and VTOL aircraft, but none had sufficient force to even scratch the Eva's paint. Asuka's attackers finally realized the futility of attacking the Eva directly and concentrated their fire on the huge cable which fed the Eva's hungry power core. Asuka swore under her breath as the activation timer began counting down from five minutes.

'Even without my umbilical cable though, I've still got twelve thousand plates of fortified armor, and my AT field!'

Enemy fire bounced off the Eva's armored exterior like raindrops of fire. Unit-02 made a sweeping gesture with its arm as it raised its AT field between itself and a group of five attacking VTOLs, exploding their incoming rocket fire in mid-air.

'There's no way I can lose, not to the likes of you!'

Unit-02 reached out and slapped at the nearest VTOL, crushing its cockpit and spinning the vehicle about its vertical axis. The Eva then grabbed the crippled VTOL by its tail and swung it like a outsized baseball bat at one of its mates, smashing them both in the process. A third VTOL moved in behind the Eva and peppered its back with rocket fire, to which the Eva responded by spinning on one leg and dropping a hammer kick through the the offending aircraft's fuselage. Still holding the remains of first VTOL's tail section, Unit-02 threw it at the fourth, which could not get out of the way fast enough to avoid sharing the first's fate. The last surviving VTOL moved in and tried to keep the Eva at bay with rocket fire, but the Eva smashed it with a roundhouse kick.

'Alright, who's next?'

Asuka looked up and saw a group of delta-winged Eva transport aircraft high over the battle zone around Tokyo-3. Dropping from them were a squadron of nine white Evangelions, of a design completely unlike anything Asuka had ever seen before. The new Evas fell a few hundred meters before they unfurled huge sets of wings and began to circle around NERV Headquarters.

'The Eva series? They've been completed?'

The nine new Evas, marked 05 through 13, landed in a ring around Eva Unit-02 and folded their wings. As she got a closer look at them, Asuka was repulsed by their appearance; unlike the vaguely humanoid heads of the older Evas, the mass-produced Evas had smooth, unarmored, eyeless heads almost reminiscent of a whale, with monstrous jaws seemingly fixed in perverse, joyless grins. Each carried a huge double-bladed lance.

Misato's voice came over the comm channel. "Listen up, Asuka. I want you to destroy the rest of the Eva series. Shinji will be there as soon as he can, so hang in there."

'"Destroy the rest of the Eva series", huh? Is that any way to talk to somebody fresh out of the hospital? Nine units in three and a half minutes... that's 20 seconds each with time to spare!'

Asuka screamed as she willed Unit-02 to charge the nearest of the Eva series. As the mass-produced Eva crouched to engage her, Unit-02 leapt over the other Eva and used her momentum to shatter the other Eva's skull, landing just behind it on hands and knees. The effectively beheaded Eva remained standing for a moment, as if it hadn't realized it was dead, then fell backwards onto Unit-02's back. Unit-02 hefted the fallen Eva's body overhead and snapped its spine, drenching Unit-02 in blood.

'Erste.'

Tossing the first mass-produced Eva's corpse aside, Asuka willed Unit-02 to tackle a second mass-produced Eva into the lake and hold it underwater. Unit-02 drew its progressive knife and stabbed the other Eva through the head, snapping part of the blade off in its skull. The mass-produced Eva shuddered briefly before going limp in the water.

Without missing a beat, Unit-02 charged across the lake to attack a third Eva, extending the blade on its progressive knife as it went. As the mass-produced Eva tried to bring its lance around to bear on Unit-02, Unit-02 slashed one of its arms off, sending its lance skittering off to one side. Unit-02 tried to wrestle the other Eva to the ground but shattered her progressive knife in the process.

'Shiesse!'

The mass-produced Eva tried to push Unit-02 off of it by grabbing at Unit-02's head. Unit-02's legs struggled to get leverage as she forced the mass-produced Eva onto the ground and wrapped its powerful arms around the mass-produced Eva's neck. Finally, Unit-02 pulled back hard and snapped the mass produced Eva's neck.

As she dropped the third mass-produced Eva's body, Asuka spied a fourth leaping down at her with its lance at the ready. She willed Unit-02 to roll out of the way and toward the lance dropped by her previous opponent, then stood and readied the massive weapon. Both Evas paused for a split second before swinging their lances. The lances were as heavy as they were ungainly, and so when each time the blades did cross, both Evas were driven backward by the impact of the other's weapon.

"Damn, they're persistent!" Asuka snarled aloud. "Of course, that idiot Shinji is nowhere to be found!"

'Hopefully that will light a fire under his ass to get up here... He's got to be listening!'

Unit-02 kept hammering away at the mass-produced Eva with the lance it had commandeered. Finally, she was able to drive the other Eva's lance out of the way long enough to deliver a killing blow to the mass-produced Eva's shoulder. Blood fountained from the stricken Eva's shoulder as the lance blade bit into its heart and lungs.

A fifth mass-produced Eva approached Unit-02 from the side, but Unit-02 dispatched it easily with a single powerful blow that literally tore it in half. Another rushed her, only to be thrown back missing a leg from a lance blow. A seventh leapt at Unit-02 as she was recovering from the lance swing and tackled her to the ground, knocking the lance from her hands. The mass-produced Eva straddled Unit-02's waist as they grappled, leering at her with that horrific grin.

Asuka snarled and decided to try a heretofore untested weapon. She willed Unit-02 to position the mass-produced Eva's head over her right shoulder plate, then punched a button marked "Point Defense". The top of the shoulder plate split open to reveal seven cylindrical launch compartments, which fired spikes into the mass-produced Eva's head. The mass-produced Eva was thrown backward off of Unit-02 as the spikes pierced its skull. Asuka grinned at the point defense weapon's fearsome effectiveness.

Unit-02 rushed one of the two remaining mass-produced Evas and tackled it into a hotel building built into the side of a hill. As the mass-produced Eva crashed through the building's fascade, Unit-02 grabbed its neck and tore its throat out. "I cannot be defeated!" Asuka roared in triumph. "Mama is watching over me!"

Unit-02 yanked the mass-produced Eva's body out of the building and hurled it at the last of the Eva series. "This is the last one!" Asuka screamed as she charged her remaining opponent. She closed on the mass-produced Eva, which was still dazed from the impact of its fallen comrade, and punched through the dead Eva's corpse. Straining to reach through the dead Eva's corpse, Unit-02 wrapped its fingers around the last Eva's core and squeezed as hard as it could. The last of the Eva series struggled for a few seconds before it sighed its last and collapsed.

'Hah! With 10 seconds to spare!'

But just as the last of the Eva series went limp, Asuka caught the briefest glimpse in her peripheral vision of something coming at her at incredible speed. She willed Unit-02 to tear its arms free from the bloodied remains of the last two of the Eva series and wheel around to face the incoming object. As it got close, Asuka could see that it was one of the Eva series' lances and immediately willed Unit-02 to raise its AT field, stopping the object in mid-air. She gasped as the suspended lance's form began to ripple and shift, into a distinctive dual pronged shape...

'The Lance of Longinus...?'

The lance tore through Unit-02's AT field and pierced the Eva's head just left of center, where a human's left eye would have been. Asuka screamed and clutched at her face as blood began to pour from her left eye socket. She tried not to think about the possibility that her eye might have actually burst.

It was an extremely inopportune time for Unit-02's battery reserves to run out, but nonetheless run out they did. Unit-02 toppled backwards, its head still impaled. The lance had driven so far through Unit-02's head that its points hit the ground before the Eva's body did, leaving the Eva supported in a strange almost-reclining position. Asuka continued to scream incoherently as she futilely worked the control sticks, hoping against hope that Unit-02 would somehow reactivate.

'No! No! Not now! Please Mama, not now!'

Suddenly Asuka felt searing pain the likes of which she had scarcely imagined, as if she were literally being torn apart. Something was on top of Unit-02, dismembering it. She could dimly make out the shapes of wings close above her, as if there were more of the Eva series than she had originally thought... or the defeated mass-produced Evas had somehow reactivated.

"I'll kill you... I'll kill you... I'll kill you..." Asuka muttered over and over again desperation, as she tried in vain to will Unit-02 to move. She focused on her rage and frustration as she mentally pled with her mother's spirit in the Eva.

'Please Mama, please don't let it end like this!'

Finally, the great bio-mechanical beast let out a roar and start to reach out feebly toward its attackers, which Asuka could make out circling overhead. Something then slammed into Unit-02's arm at enormous speed, splitting it in half lengthwise... and through the haze of hate and pain she was in, Asuka thought she saw her own arm split in half as well.

Asuka had one last coherent thought before, mercifully, she fainted:

'Shinji, why didn't you come...?'

But it was not the end.


AUTHOR'S NOTES:

This was originally going to be called "The Last Day"; I decided to change the title fairly late in the writing process, but I think the new title fits better. Sorry it took so long to get this out; my list of excuses ranges all the way from a Christmas ice storm to jury duty! I also had a bit of, um, "fun" keeping QuickEdit from devouring punctuation for no apparent reason...

There's one more chapter coming, "Forgive Me", which will be about Asuka's experience in Instrumentality (based on both End of Evangelion and episodes 25 and 26).