Jean Havoc sighed. Being sick was normally bad. This time was ten times worse, however, due mostly to Havoc's semi-neurotic roommate, Cain Fury, who insisted he do all sorts of peculiar things to relieve his cold. For three nights in a row now Fury had forced him to take steaming hot baths for twenty minutes to sweat out the germs; it hadn't worked, Fury said, because Havoc probably hadn't done it right. As a sort of punishment, the Sergeant-Major was now forcing him to sit in the bathroom while he himself took his shower so that Havoc could breathe in the steam. Apparently this would clear up his congestion.

Yeah, right, Havoc thought, slumping down on the closed toilet lid. Out loud he said, "I bet this won't work. It's stupid and pointless."

"Quit your whining," Fury replied over the roar of the shower. "You sound like you want to be sick."

"Hey, it really ain't so bad. I haven't had to listen to the Colonel talk about all the women he's stolen from me, I haven't had Hawkeye yelling in my ear for smoking, and I've had you all but waiting on me hand and foot. So yeah, I like being sick pretty alright." He sneezed. "Damnit."

"You know Hawkeye's just going to yell at you for getting sick when you get back. You've already fallen behind on your paperwork."

Havoc put his hands behind his head in a relaxed position. "Well, I'll deal with that when I get back. I prefer to live for the moment." He heard Fury snort. "What?"

"Nothing…nothing…"

Havoc grinned and looked around for something to do. He really should've brought a book, but he hadn't been thinking properly when Fury shoved him into the bathroom, shut the door, then stepped behind the shower curtain to undress and turn on the water. The younger man had always been painfully shy about his body, never using the men's locker room at headquarters, which (in Havoc's opinion) only lent evidence to the rumour that he was actually gay. In all honesty, the second lieutenant couldn't have cared less if his roommate was homosexual; he himself was bi, but not many people knew it.

In any case…ah ha! His questing eyes landed on the bathroom faucet, and an evil glint appeared in his expression as a wicked idea formed. He had grown up with an older brother who was always doing mean stuff to him, and now that experience was finally paying off. Quietly, Havoc slid off the toilet and traversed the few steps to the sink. Grabbing the cup they used as a toothbrush holder and dumping the brushes out, he carefully filled the cup with cold water. Grinning to himself, he climbed slowly on top of the toilet and lifted the cup toward the shower, ready to tip it at just the right mo-

"Don't you dare!" Fury shrieked suddenly.

Havoc froze. His hand was only half-way to the top of the shower, but he dared not move it an inch. "What do you mean?"

"I lived with five sisters and two brothers; I know all the tricks. I had to train my ears to hear the sink faucet being turned on in every part of the house. Don't…you…dare!"

"Dare what?" Havoc knew his voice was a little too innocent – he wanted it to be. "Oh, you mean this?" He flung the water over the rail holding up the shower curtain. On the other side there was a strangled yell and the squeak of feet on shower (linoleum?), then a triumphant "HA!"

He must have moved. Havoc cursed but grinned all the same. "You think that'll stop me? I can still get more water." He jumped off the toilet.

"No!" A hand shot out from behind the curtain to grab a towel off the rack. The blond man quickly dove for the sink and turned the faucet on full blast, but just as the cup filled completely, something that felt like a small, male body hit his back and hung on, causing him to spill most of the water back into the sink. He hurriedly refilled it, then turned his head to find himself face to face with Fury. The younger man had attached himself to the older with both legs around his waist and one arm slung over his shoulder, hand clutching his chest while the other held the towel in place around his own waist.

"See?" the sergeant-major panted. "There are advantages to being small." He tightened his grip in all three places: waist, chest, and towel.

"You do realize I can still get you, don't you?"

"Of course. But you'll get yourself wet as well."

"You are already getting me wet!" He dumped the water directly over Fury's head, who shrieked.

"That's it!" He began wiping his dark hair dry on Havoc's shirt. Havoc just laughed and leaned forward to reload his cup – and felt something odd.

"Fury, what's poking me in the back?"

The smaller man let go of him as though he had been poisoned. He looked terrified. "Nothing. I…I don't know what you're talking about." He stepped back into the shower with the towel still on. A moment later, said towel, now soaked, was thrown onto the bathroom floor. "Go get me a new towel, please."

"But I have to stay here to breathe the steam." Havoc smirked. So the kid really was gay. Good. That would make explaining things to him a lot easier. He hadn't been misreading the signs Fury seemed to be giving off, and he probably wouldn't reject Havoc when he told him how he felt. Havoc hadn't felt this wonderful since before he had gotten sick.

"You've breathed enough steam for now, shouldn't overdo it."

Havoc left to do as he was told, but when he returned he did not leave again as Fury clearly wanted him to. Instead he climbed once more onto the toilet, this time peering over the curtain rod. Fury had his eyes closed as he ran his hands through his hair, rinsing all the conditioner out of it. Havoc carefully put first one foot, then the other, onto the edge of the tub and, using the rod as support, peered farther over it into the shower. Fury really seemed to be enjoying himself as he massaged his own scalp, and it would be a shame to disrupt him, but not that big of a shame. Havoc looked the other man over, appreciating every inch of skin he could see (and he could see quite a bit) before sticking out one hand to test the water. "You know, this water is suspiciously cold. Are you sure nothing was poking me in the back?"

The reaction was instantaneous, just as he had expected from one trained in the military: he yelled, went down on his knees, and covered his privates with his hands. "Jesus Christ, Havoc, I'm naked here!" His eyes were scrunched tight in humiliation and his cheeks were flushed red.

"So?" Havoc chuckled. "We're both men, aren't we? Nothing I haven't seen before."

"Yeah, but…but…." He shook his head. "You know I'm shy about my body." He turned redder.

"Because you're gay." Blunt worked best.

His head snapped up to glare, squinting to try to see his roommate without his glasses. He was obviously panicked. "You can't tell anyone! I'll be kicked out of the military, gays aren't allowed. Look, I'm really sorry about what happened just now. If you want…I mean, if it makes you uncomfortable, I'll move out."

Havoc snickered quietly: he was so cute when he got flustered. "You're not the only one keeping your sexual orientation from the military, you know."

"You…you…what? You're-"

"Bi."

Fury stared; his blush worsened. "Somehow, that doesn't make me feel better about you staring at me in the shower."

Havoc laughed outright at that and dropped back to the floor. "You have a nice body; you really shouldn't be ashamed of it." No answer. He glanced at himself in the mirror. "I'm all wet."

"Not all wet." It was barely more than a mutter, but he still heard it.

Havoc poked his head around the shower curtain, grinning mischievously. "I could be if you wanted me to be."

This time the younger man did not try to hide. His smile was almost as mischievous as Havoc's, though a bit gentler. "Fine by me."

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A/N: I have no idea where this came from, nor what it is supposed to be. Was originally RoiAi, but I could not think of a suitable reason for either to be in the other's bathroom.

Huge mistake: Why would Havoc conclude that Fury is gay just because he's shy of his body? I have no clue. Please overlook it.

Disclaimer: I no own. Deal with it.