Flashing Lights and Sounds
By Jedi-and
Disclaimer: I do not own TT, nor do I own Mr.Noel Collins but I DO own some of my own characters.
Note: Just so you know, in this fic Starfire is roughly 17-18 earth years old. She can have a baby if she wishes. Besides if you still are not happy with it, read the explanation in the last chapter.
Enjoy!
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Chapter 9: 1000 words, all Ouch (or words to that effect).
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Well I suppose you probably want to know what happened next.
After Robin found out about the turn of events that had occurred, him being the thief and all that had broken into Nigel's room (if it wasn't obvious enough already), he confronted Starfire, who confirmed his suspicions of thinking she might be... in trouble. Sadly, because of her alien DNA, no one could actually tell if she was or not. But while Nigel pondered this problem and ways of solving it, Robin and his other half (plus one?) tried to work things out, and she had been banned from doing any form of crime fighting until they knew for certain.
Unfortunately, Robin has also started to re-blame Nigel for keeping this a secret, even though it was at the request of Starfire herself. He never seems to catch a break when it comes to their leader, does he? He understood about the first time, as he DID attack her, but back then there was a war on. But this is just plain stupid. Then again, for all his talents Robin was still a teenager. Doing something stupid was practically their divine right.
Well, a few months have moved on since then. Nigel has been a Titan for around 5 months. In other news, Beast Boy and Charm have been steadily (though secretly) seeing each other, and it seems to be going well. She also (by appointment of Garfield Logan) is now an Honorary Teen Titan, much in the same way as Aqualad. This meant she wasn't on the roster, but could be called on when trouble was at hand.
Still no news of her brother though, who had eluded capture. Aqualad's help to try and find him also came up a big zero (Aqualad complained that all he had done since he became an Honorary Teen Titan was look for bodies to make sure villains were dead). One small favour though, as they found Nigel's wallet in the water. He had lots of precious metal coins that they had traded in for large sums of cash to help rebuild the tower.
In other local news the android that escaped Gotham city has still evaded incarceration and officials are becoming more and more worried for the citizens of other cities close to it, as it is a heavily armed piece of equipment. It was supposedly armed with the most powerful human-sized riffle in production (gee, ain't THAT a coincidence). The rifle of that calibre was usually mounted onto the top of an armoured car, but the android seems strong enough to be able to use it as a personal weapon, even while running. No more details regrettably.
"To the bridge, computer!"
And of course the ever-random return of one of the more laid back Titans: Robert Cantite, also know as Gauntlet.
"I am not the Star Trek computer, and we have no 'bridge' level." A mechanical voice came through the elevator as it started to ascend. Gauntlet shrugged a little and reminded himself to program a sense of humour into the Titan mainframe, with a little help from Cyborg.
Robert had just returned from what the Titans frequently refer to as the most boring part of the year, the annual conference of the financial side of heroism. Basically, a lot of lawyers talking to superheroes about the number of buildings they have destroyed to save the day and the cost of rent and damages. The whole thing took months, as every so often, and more likely than not, one of the superheroes would have to depart to save the world, or some randomness like someone attacking the hotel where they stayed, and sometimes the little things like 'borrowing' a bathrobe raised suspicions on identity and ability to be a hero in the first place. Gauntlet had tried his hardest to prove that the robe with the hotel insignia on it was a family heirloom, and the fact he had about seven or eight in his bag meant that he was carrying spares in case one got damaged.
Well, he had finally convinced them to let him go if he returned the robes and also paid attention at the meetings, which he did. To a degree. He returned the ones he stole; only to steal fresh ones by claiming someone else was stealing his. It was society paying him back for the long hours and lack of holiday or even a steady pay check. Oh, and the saving of the world thing as well.
What do you expect from a man who only got onto the Titans by court order?
He reached the living room via elevator and jumped out, singing his own theme tune, one arm outstretched in a super hero like pose.
"DA-DA-DA-DAAAA!!" He bellowed at the top of his lungs, waiting to be heard, and heard he was. Everyone in the tower heard him, and someone in the docks across from the Tower's island thought they had heard a yell, but then put it down to his schizophrenic delusions.
"Don't tell me..." Savior groaned, hoping for dear life that it wasn't the man he thought it was. He and Gauntlet didn't really get along. Okay that was an understatement: they NEVER got along. One was serious and intellectual, the other was a lad's lad, who joked and showed off.
Cyborg looked around and smiled as the last missing Titan returned.
"Okay, I won't tell you."
"What? You didn't miss me?" Rob asked, wrapping his arms around Noel, who quickly shrugged it off and jumped up and over to another seat, a look of pure disgust on his face. Great, Goofman was back. JUST what he needed.
"So, what ya get me?" Beast Boy asked, jumping around to face him, his usual huge smile splattered across his features.
"Who said I got you anything?"
"Dude, that's low..."
"I know, maybe these Grand Harbour Hotel bathrobes will cheer you up?" He said, holding out a shimmering white piece of cloth as he unfurled it to reveal the wonder of a five star hotel dressing gown, lined in gold and as soft as... a very soft thing (I would say snow, but spending a week falling over onto it I can tell you snow isn't as soft as they advertise...)
"One for you, one for you, even one for you grumpy!" He handed them out, throwing the one for Noel at him. Noel didn't even flinch as it landed right on his face; he just pulled it off and turned the page, ignoring him.
"Thanks." He muttered
"One for your bird too." Rob added. He threw another, but this time the Shimmer caught it and placed it gently on the side next to him.
"Don't call Raven my bird. She's not in a cage singing to me for birdseed."
"That's not what she was saying the last time I saw her!" Rob cracked. Noel had to resist every urge he had to grab Gauntlet and throw him out the window. He had to resist that urge at least three times in an average day with Rob.
Rob passed a robe to Robin, who was sat on the other side of the couch with another controller in hand, and then he came across someone who he hadn't seen before, who was also reading, but upside down in a chair. "And who are you?"
"I'm Scalpel, AKA Nigel Hastings, the newest Titan, it's a pleasure."
"I'm Gauntlet, the ex-newest Titan. Hey man, you usurped me! Oh well, have a bath robe anyway, even if I don't know who the hell you are. Usurper." He handed the alien one of the monogrammed gowns and turned back to the group.
"How exactly did you come by these? To my knowledge just one of these is worth over one hundred dollars." Noel questioned, looking at, in his opinion, the least trustworthy Titan, much less so than their latest edition. At least Nigel had been a soldier, and he understood the hardships of battle and this life. Rob never seemed to even REGISTER there were hardships, which greatly irritated Noel.
"Well...let's just say I felt it was time to be paid back for our hard work."
"Stolen." All the other Titans groaned.
"It's only stolen if they know its gone!" He argued. "Besides, they expect you to steal things! They said so on the Simpsons!"
"The Simpsons is a cartoon. This is real life." Noel said in not-so- pleasant tone.
"Anyway! The new guy!" Gauntlet said. He turned to Nigel, quickly changing subjects to get away from the stream of enquiries that was sure to follow. "How was the Hazing? Nice and painful I hope." He laughed, before there was a pause.
"Ha-zing?" Nigel asked, looking up from where he was, a confused look coming across where the smile used to be.
Then the boys (well, except Noel, who looked up and rolled his eyes as he realized what had just happened) grinned evilly at the sudden realization of it all.
He was never hazed.
Oh sure, he had been interrogated and proved himself in battle just fine, but never hazed. Which gave the boys something to do, and also gave them a reason to get back at everyone's favourite Blacktrinian. Robin wanted the chance to get even because of the secret kept between himself and his girlfriend. The duo of Cyborg and Beast Boy want to lay the smackdown on the doctor for all the times he has done that to them in the video game world (how the hell did he managed to work a controller so efficiently with only two fingers?). Gauntlet wants to because Nigel has managed to get away with being here as part of the team without being hazed. And despite his irritation at the whole concept, even Noel had a slight desire to do it: when Starfire's pregnancy was made public, Raven banned him from ever touching her again until she said so, which at this moment in time is still in effect (And she meant it. Just to test this theory he tried to get close to her, in a sort of 'let us see by touch' kind of way, and she promptly turned around and lifted him from her room via her magic, and locked the door. At least she didn't inflict any damage to his genitals) Normally, Noel could have lived with this...had he and Raven not started sleeping together shortly before Nigel had arrived (and it was a damn good reason. Jason Blood had called Raven and told him that while hunting through interdimensional realms had had stumbled onto the information that her father, weakened from the brutal battle he had had with the Titans, had been slain by another for his power. She was free of his curse forever. And since Noel had just gotten back from a task that had kept her separated from him for a long time...well, use your imagination). And while he was, unlike SOME people he knew, a slave to his hormones, he still liked doing it, and now he couldn't, and his blame for that has been placed on the doctor, as he can't blame Raven or the others.
Nigel, at this point, was now on his feet and looking very scared.
"Why do I now fear for my life?" He asked plainly, drumming on the arm of the chair lightly.
"Titans! Go!" Robin called as they (excluding Noel) dived at him. Luckily he countered and rolled backwards over the chair, meaning that Gauntlet and Cyborg ended up going face first into the base of the seat. Nigel flipped backwards and ran down the corridor past Starfire and Raven, who were making Kory the biggest sandwich ever made inside of the tower. It stood a full 7 bread slices high, and had everything from Starfire's favourite foods to random bits of Tofu left by Beast Boy. Raven didn't look too impressed.
"And a little bit here, and there, and we are done! Our wonderful piece of bread loaf intermixed with meats and dairies have produced a wonderful specimen, ready for the eating." She cooed, before attempting to lift the structure from the plate to take a bite from it. She then saw a red blur pass by, followed by lots of other blurs, followed by Noel, who was casually strolling after them, trying to act like he was above the whole deal.
"Friend Raven, correct me if I am wrong, but was that Nigel followed by the other Titans?" Kory questioned, pausing from the monumental snack in front of her. Raven, who had been reading, looked up.
"Didn't see."
Cyborg walked past, holding his hand above his eyes in the body language that said he was looking for someone. He was holding a cricket bat in the other, and was closely followed by Gauntlet.
"Well, well, the 'hero' returns." Raven commented, turning all the way around to face the pair.
"Have you seen Nigel? He needs hazing." Gauntlet replied. Raven was about to say no, but then she had a thought. Ever since Nigel arrived, she didn't remember ever giving him a hazing, as all members of the Titans had to participate. And the hazing was a tradition. Even SHE had endured one.
And admittingly, for as well as her cold exterior hid it, not allowing Noel near was starting to take its toll on her also...
Alas, she could not just simply let go of her principles, so she must take her frustrations out by other means, like meditating... and hazing. She liked that idea, oh she did indeed, because at that moment she levitated six cricket bats above her, slowly spinning them in a circle. Where did she get the cricket bats? Hey, I just work here.
Cyborg gulped as she ran forwards. Gauntlet was about to address Starfire on whether or not she wanted to join them, but he noticed the piece of clothing she happened to be wearing, and what it said. It was a pink T- shirt with white writing, and it said 'mother in training' and an arrow pointing to her stomach. It took nigh on three...seconds to him to work it out, and then he left to go find Nigel himself, which in turn left Starfire alone to try her best at the monster sandwich and take it easy.
Nigel, on the other hand, wasn't taking it easy at all. He was trying his hardest to escape the obviously persistent Titans who were in hot pursuit. Rounding a corner, Nigel found an old service hatch and kicked down on it at an angle, flipping it up into the air. Catching it, he jumped down the hole holding it above him, sealing it off as he fell for a bit and then landed in his room. He had found this by accident one day, when he was walking and he heard a hollow noise. Not thinking his plan ahead, he slammed his foot down hard and fell through into the room that was now his bedroom, seriously bruising his coccyx. And before you say anything that's the bone at the base of the spine that is also referred to as the tailbone. Get your minds out of the gutter. That's MY job. Heh heh. Ahem...
Now safely in the sanctuary of his own room, Nigel sighed and reached up for the cord that turned on the lights.
"That was too close." He breathed, clicking on the light.
"It was, wasn't it?" The doctor looked around, his eyes wide and then he saw them. Standing there were the rest of the Teen Titans, armed to the teeth with what looked like wooden battle clubs, each wearing a sadistic smile on their features (even Noel and Raven had an inkling of it, as much as they were trying to hide it and act like they were unwillingly getting dragged along).
The how's and the why's on exactly how they had all beaten him into his own room no longer mattered. All that did matter was escaping, and that killer Blacktrinian survival instinct told him one thing. When in a room this size facing that many opponents, there was only one thing to do.
Trap them, then escape.
And that he did. Using what little speed he could build up, he ran to the side and grabbed one of his long wall scrolls, jumping back over in a complete flip, wrapping up Beast Boy and Cyborg. He would have repeated that again, but the close proximity of his foes meant he could be grabbed anywhere, so the only thing to do was kick up his bed sheet into their faces and make a break for the door. As if that would work, but did it anyway, jumping up and over...
"Got you!" Gauntlet shouted, producing a barrier in front of him. He flew face first into this invisible wall, and then Noel and the Shimmer stepped in, wrapping up the Blacktrinian so he couldn't move.
"Why does life hate me?" He asked, sighing. The rest laughed to themselves.
Let the Hazing, begin!
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Throughout all the pain and hurt that the Titans had supplied, with all the fights and arguments and the blame placed on him, Nigel Hastings never once regretted joining the Titans.
Until now.
He was, at this moment in time, tied to a chair with the other Titans in front of him preparing what they called the Hazing ceremony. From what he had gathered from the conversations amongst themselves, he would be tested on his reflexes, endurance, honesty and commitment through a series of activities, most of which seems to involve the use of those dangerous looking, but non-lethal battle clubs. He sweatdropped and sighed. It was cruel enough to tie him up, but they had found his nighttime claw covers and used them so he couldn't cut through the bindings. What a predicament.
"No way! He HAS to be hazed now!"
Nigel looked back up as Gauntlet shouted what he had, before placing one 'club' in his mouth while holding two in each hand.
"Whoa there 'Suron', this isn't 'One Piece' and you are not with a pirate made out of rubber." Beast Boy said, holding back Titan number seven with a hand on his shoulder.
"Someone has been watching too much anime again." Raven stated as she made her way past them, her cricket bat held loosely in one hand, dragging it across the floor.
"Well aren't we Miss Know It All. Wait a sec, how did YOU know it was an anime?" Gar asked, pointing a white-gloved hand at the sorceress. Raven stopped in her tracks and turned around.
"...You said so."
"No I didn't, I said it was 'One Piece', I didn't say it was an anime, and only a handful in this area know of it because they don't stock it in the stores around here!"
"..."
"You've been anime binging in the night!" Cyborg called in realization, his hand pointing. Raven didn't have anything to say.
"Quick, get the doctor! She's in denial!" Gauntlet yelled in mock horror, as he ran around a little before Savior grabbed him with the Shimmer and ground him to a halt.
"He's over there." Noel pointed at Nigel.
"Who?"
"The doctor."
"Nigel is the new Doctor Who? Cool!"
Noel facevaulted.
Robin entered the room (strangely, via an air duct) and landed a little worse for wear but still whole. Although his clothes were a little charred and tattered, he seemed generally okay.
"Robin! Your safe return greatly pleases me!" Starfire hugged her other half, which was followed by the usual call of...wait for it...
"Air, Star! Air!"
She promptly let go, with her usual blush, and returned to her place in the line up. She had eaten the entire sandwich, with little or no trouble. She would have made another one but she was called to help the hazing.
Plus she had used up all the food in the fridge, blue and furry or not.
"So did you get it?" Rob asked.
Robin held up a golden rope with a knot in one end that doubled on itself in a slipknot or in layman's terms, a lasso. A golden lasso. Wonder Woman's golden lasso. Wonder Woman's golden lasso of truth if I have to get painfully obvious with you.
"It took me forever to find this, and then I had to break into the security systems to unlock it. Even then it was pretty tough to get it."
"But security codes for you, that's not problem right? You were trained by Batman in computers!" Beast Boy said, shrugging at what took him so long.
"The security system was designed by Batman!" Noel countered, expressing his point a little... vividly. Well he was a fan of the Dark Knight I suppose. Plus, he found the whole concept of breaking into the Watchtower just to take Wonder Woman's golden lasso of truth for the sake of a HAZING ritual absolutely asinine, almost offensive. That, and Rob hadn't had it happened to him because Robin hadn't been able to break in that time.
"Calm Noel, calm." Raven said, placing one hand on his shoulder.
"Yes dear." Noel replied, knowing he was in the majority.
"Woppah." Nigel said from the back of the room, in a plain voice. Noel arched an eyebrow, wondering what he had said. Maybe it was Blacktrinian. But if so, why was Beast Boy smiling? And Cyborg and Gauntlet?
"Someone has been watching Friends."
"It is a very amusing portrayal on human behaviour." The doctor said, giving a trademark grin and laughing.
"He is saying you are whipped my friend!" Beast Boy called, unable to stop himself from laughing. For those who don't know, 'Woppah' is the sound Chandler made when he said that someone was 'whipped'.
"I am NOT whipped!" Noel yelled. "She doesn't control me!" He pointed to Raven, who quickly and slyly bit his finger. "OW! What was that for!"
"Who is she? The cat's mother?" Raven replied.
"Don't do that! It completely undermines my point!"
"Did you ever have one to begin with?" Raven rumbled. It was her turn to get a little annoyed as she glared at her now slightly cowering boyfriend. All the while, Nigel was laughing his head off at the display of disorganisation and lack of cooperation. And it made him laugh, oh yes indeed it did, as soon he would not be laughing, but instead hurting from the head down. "Can we start now? I have things to do."
"Yeah, like making time for Savior to apologize for an hour, then an hour of making out to seal the deal." Gar said, once again opening his big mouth. Cyborg jumped in and covered it, but too late. Noel and Raven were both looking very unhappy.
Nigel too had shut up, afraid what a broody Goth girl who has been deprived of the newly discovered joys of sexual pleasure for a month might do to him. The whole pleasure/pain idea came back into focus. She had no physical pleasure, so she would cause him as much pain as humanly possible.
Oh joy.
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Blindfolded, they allowed their captive to stand up without restraints for the first of the tasks, 'The Ever Decreasing Circle', or in other words where all the Titans surround him and hit him with a paddle randomly, closing in. So they started, swinging in...
Unfortunately for them Nigel somehow jumped up and slashed at the first one, chopping it in half before he kicked away another. He disarmed one of the Titans and threw the paddle at another.
There was a pause. It was great when things went to plan, wasn't it?
"What just..." Cyborg asked, looking at his ruined paddle in disbelief.
"Did I pass?" Nigel asked, lifting off his blindfold to see the decimation he had wrought on his unsuspecting opponents.
"But how..." Beast Boy started, before he stopped and came closer to Nigel. "Has anyone ever noticed how large and pointed his ears are?"
"This is no time for ear envy Gar." Robin muttered grimly as he stood up, rubbing his sore jaw line from where the cricket bat had hit him.
"No, I know what he is getting at..." Noel stated, with Raven nodding.
"He can hear everything to the point that it's as effective as if he was seeing it with his own eyes." She noted. "He was able to disarm Star because he heard no footsteps, abet breathing, and assumed it was one of the women, who can both fly, so he went a little gentler on her. As for Cyborg he heard heavy footsteps and so disabled you by destroying your paddle."
Her voice obviously spoke the truth because of the wide grin of pride slapped onto the Blacktrinians face.
"So what do we do?"
"Get the earmuffs of DOOM!" Gauntlet shouted, raising his hand high with one of the few paddles left. The other guys, save Noel, who kept trying to talk to Raven and kept getting shoved away, agreed and they brought out a pair of pink earmuffs.
"I said OF DOOOM!"
Cyborg shrugged and wrote 'of Doom' on them before slapping them onto the Blacktrinian's head. With a worried expression on everyone's face, they started again, moving a little cautiously.
It wasn't necessary. This time he was helpless, and was therefore beaten relentlessly. Although he suffered less than Savior did when he had gone through this, he hurt much more than when Gauntlet had to do this. Blacktrinians are thick skinned, not impervious to pain.
"Now for the Unblinking Eye." Whack, whack, whack, whack, whack, whack.
"Now for the Crossing The Desert!" Whack, whack, whack, whack, whack.
"Owwwww." Nigel was starting to hurt.
"Oh stop it you baby. You had a blade shoved through you and before that you fell several stories and landed in water and the only thing that bothered you about that was that you couldn't swim. You can take a few blows with a paddle." Noel said.
"And now as a tribute to Savior, we have the Golf Swing of Dismay."
"What's the Golf Swing of..."
WHACK!!!
"DISSMMMAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!" Starfire had swung like there was no tomorrow and poor old Nigel was sent flying off into the sunset, or at least where it would have been there in a few hours. Unless you were in the Green Berets movie.
"I'm sooooo proud." Noel said sarcastically, faking a tear as Nigel disappeared. He landed around forty foot away, on the way passing through a random office building, going through one side and out the other to land in a large tree in a local park. He had cursed all the way there in his normal tongue and people thought there was some sort of monster coming down the road. Locals reported seeing something red and white flying through the sky. He was picked up 20 minuets later by Raven.
"You okay?"
"I hate you all." Was his only reply.
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After the equally disastrous 'leap of faith' they retired to do the twenty questions round. What made that round so awful in comparison to the first one? Well Nigel did as he was told and jumped, and whoever drew the short straw would catch him on his way down.
"You ready?" Cyborg had lifted up his earmuff to ask him.
"Yes." He replied honestly before jumping off the edge. Expecting to be caught any time soon.
Anytime.
Now would be nice.
Except up top they had forgotten who was supposed to catch him.
"It's suppose to be Star."
"In her condition? I thought it was Savior."
"Not me, it's my better half's turn."
"Whipped."
"Shut UP!"
"It's not me."
Splash.
"Oh shiatsu. It was me." Gauntlet said, holding up the short straw. They made their way over to the edge and looked down. "Do I have to save him?"
"I'd recommend it. He can't swim." Noel said.
Except Nigel, once he was near the ground, had struggled out of Gauntlet's grip and started running around the Tower to escape this madness. This time the Titans had had to chase him around for twenty minutes before they caught him.
So Nigel, now wet, sweaty, mad, and feeling like he cheated death yet again, was sitting in the living room, his arm tied to one of the chairs with the golden lasso. He had a piercing stare on his face, glaring at the Titans in a manner that could only be described as utter disgust.
"I said I was sorry!" Rob called, sitting cross-legged on the floor as Nigel's eyes came upon him. He had started to calm down a little, which was a good thing for the ex-con Gauntlet.
"Twenty questions!" Beast Boy said. Four of them were present for this round of Twenty Questions: Beast Boy, Cyborg, Robin and Starfire. Gauntlet was present but not allowed to ask any questions because of his major screw up earlier, and after running around trying to catch Gauntlet and getting all worked up, and finding themselves alone on the other side of the tower, temptation was just too much for Savior and Raven to fight off. Let's just say if they are not careful, there could be another baby on the way. Possibly a girl named Kyra (o-).
"Starfire, if you would be so kind to start."
The other hazing veterans groaned as they knew she would pick the most obvious questions, but I suppose they were a little necessary.
"What is your real name?"
"Nigicalnack Hastionfarlock, which is abbreviated to Nigel Hastings."
A screwed up expression speared onto the features of the humans in the room. How did his people pronounce that on a daily basis?!
"Where did you live?"
"Star, haven't we talked about this before?" Robin asked, patting her hand lightly before letting her continue. They had talked about the whole idea of Twenty Questions before, and to be honest she was a little confused, but it didn't bother her.
"I live on the Azubak moon in the Vegnerenom system, in a small picturesque village called Uintoe." He replied, smiling for the first time since the hazing began. Although this was his home now, he still liked the village and the people there, and more is the pity because they really did notice that he was gone, as every morning he would walk his same route to the pier, spend a few hours fishing and walk in casually late to the doctor surgery, only to be told off and told he was a lazy bum. He'd then work madly and cook some of the fish that night at the local bar to be raffled off as a free meal.
But let us not dwell on the past.
"I have been to that moon; it's very nice in the summer as it is not very hot." Starfire said, a wide smile on her face. "But I must ask you, if you ever had the chance to go back, would you?"
"It really depends on a lot of things."
"Why?"
"Wasted question!" Beast Boy groaned, falling over.
"Well one reason to go back would be so I could see my father and some of my friends. Another reason could be because I loved the fish on that moon. But it I ever went back there the military would find me and kill me in a very harsh way for desertion. So I would rather stay here on this quaint little planet, with my new friends... even if SOME let me FALL off a BUILDING." He glared once again at Gauntlet. There was a slight pause at what he had said, but they continued on anyway.
"If you could get hold of it, would you ever allow us to have Blacktrinian alcohol?"
Surprise was the only look on Robin's face at Star's question.
"It really depends, can you handle it?"
"We ask the questions around here." Robin cut in, not wanting to divulge that some of them can't handle a few pints of beer, let alone what his race's alcohol might be like. The question alone of 'can you handle it' posed a question of its strength. Not to mention that all the Titans were technically under the legal drinking age anyway!
"My turn!" Beast Boy called, really anxious to get in some good questions.
"No way! It's always me next!" His taller friend Cyborg replied, looking as if he wanted to start a fight. "Anyway, first question! If you had a piece of rope tied to a building and two people where falling, one being really thin, and the other being really fat, which one would you catch?"
"Both, all you have to do is swing while falling and you move in an arc, catching both." He beamed, having an answer for everything.
"Alright, are those real? Or are they the result of some experiment?" Cyborg said. He pointed to Nigel's claws.
"All Blacktrinians have these. They are given to the children when they are old enough, which is around one or two years of your time old I think. They are grafted onto the skin to protect our hands. Able to slice almost anything and yet cradle a baby at the same time. Both men and woman have these claws."
"Do you feel that you can be a vital part of this team?"
"Not vital, but I could help I feel with the increase of overpowered villains appearing now and again. That Lord fellow sounded very unpleasant. Though I seem very clumsy I can help... Did I just say that?"
"It's the truth lasso."
"Oh."
"Next question; have you ever played any musical instruments?"
"I used to play an instrument called the Fackla; I suppose the human equivalent would be the drums with the cymbols and the bass drum."
A little smile came across the face of the lads before Cyborg asked the last question.
"If you had a room, would it be facing the sun in the morning, afternoon, evening or not at all?"
"I do not understand the question."
"Too bad Cyborg, my turn!" Beast Boy jumped in quickly before Cyborg could clarify his question. As Savior did, Nigel didn't feel comfortable at all with Beast Boy at the controls of the truth lasso.
"What is the most embarrassing thing you have ever done?"
"I got, as you humans say, plastered against my will one night and I ended up suspended by my feet from a tall building on my home world singing about a cartoon character. It must have been a good night, as that is all I can remember of it..." He smiled, paused, then quickly frowned and buried his face in his free hand cursing in Blacktrinian. "I had never wanted to tell anyone that."
Laughs seemed to fill the room for a little while before the next question was to be asked.
"Wonder Woman or Black Canary?"
"Wonder Woman, got to love that figure..." He groaned. "Foolish truth lasso."
"What do you do in your spare time? Apart from videogames."
"I sharpen my claws, catch up on all the medical red tape you have neglected and generally relax any way I can. Oh, and I go fishing."
"Sharpen your claws?"
"Yes, it's the big blade I have in my room with the chair attached to it. It's very sharp and helps keep my claws keen. Question number five please."
"What?"
"You asked me about my Ylental, or claw sharpener. And now you just asked what I meant by the question four comment, which is all five of your questions used up."
Nigel beamed. He loved outsmarting Beast Boy. He had the most confused expression on his face anyone ever had, and then he just walked off.
"Right, I suppose it's my turn." Robin sat forward a little, pondering. "From what we have seen, you cannot swim. Is this just you or a race thing?"
"No one I know of can swim; we dare not go into the water because if we go to deep then we will drown."
"That doesn't mean you can't ever swim, right?" He asked, opening a palm. This seemed to make Starfire think about something as she had a look on her face of pure concentration.
"I wouldn't know."
"Okay, a serious question now. If I gave you an order which you disagreed with, would you follow it?"
"Yes if I understood it. I'd do it but I wouldn't like doing it, as you are the leader. But I wouldn't do it if I didn't understand."
"Right, and finally what are your feelings towards us in general? What do you feel when you look at us all?"
"Well I mainly feel an attachment to you. You are my new friends and although you may be complicated beings I feel I can trust you... mostly. Now un-strap me please, this is starting to cut into my skin."
"Well I suppose you pass. The egg question wasn't needed as you seem to eat anything." Robin untied the bindings and Nigel leapt up.
"FREE!"
"Not yet, we still have one round left."
Beast Boy came back as an octopus, carrying with him eight trays of one dozen soy-sauce bottles, each. Nigel's heart plummeted. He had to prove himself in one final task? This was getting old and repetitive.
"I ask that Starfire be removed from this activity, her condition and all."
"You speak as if she's ill. Or has Fearless turned Fearful for his baby's health?"
"Quiet you."
"Can we skip this round? I've already done this at the restaurant we went to a few months ago." Nigel sighed, wanting to now go and rest up.
"Besides there will be a monster in 5...4...3...2...1..." Nothing. Cyborg looked up and around, wondering what was going to happen, wondering if his watch was off. Then the alarm sounded. "So close."
"Monster?" Nigel asked.
"It's a sludge creature. The one that ALWAYS appears when we enlist a new member." Raven said, waiting at the computer, her make up a little smudged as she waited for the others with her other half.
"Mortimer?" Gauntlet asked.
"Yep." Raven replied. Robin was about to say something when he noticed something else. There was a slight pause before their leader broke the silence.
"Raa, you realise that you're wearing a skintight costume?"
"I always wear this."
"But this time you forgot your bra." Beast Boy pointed out.
She looked down and blushed before she ran off as quickly as possible, leaving the lads to fall over laughing. Looking unhappy, Noel got up. Gauntlet started to say something.
"DON'T. Or I'll whip YOU." Savior growled, the Shimmer forming into a nasty looking cat o'nine tails. He followed Raven back to her room, where another argument ensued on who was at fault for this. Raven ended it by throwing a book at Noel with her power.
"Why are you blaming ME? I take your clothes OFF, I don't put them ON, it's not up to me to dress you!"
"You should have said something!"
"I didn't notice!"
"Oh how typical."
"Look, forget this!" Noel yelled as Raven finished pulling her outfit back up. "Mortimer is back, we need to stop him, let's settle this later, lives are at stake! Now teleport us there!"
"You got THAT wrong." Raven said, and disappeared into the shadows.
"God dammit..." Noel said, and then a strange growling noise came out of his mouth as he tried to mimic one of the sounds he had heard repeatedly while Nigel was getting tortured, assuming it was a curse. Nigel nearly died laughing, and so did the others, when Nigel said Noel's human tongue had garbled it and basically told the curtains that he thought his own chest looked like a toilet. Noel just sighed and leapt out a window. Screw his fellows, he had to save the day.
Just another normal day in Titan tower. And as per usual, Starfire and Nigel where left behind. Starfire for obvious reasons and Nigel because he wasn't a fully fledged member yet. Both stood there, as if they had run out of energy, their limbs hanging limply as they swayed slightly.
"What about us?" They asked, before sighing. "Humans."
----------------------------------------------------
Longest chapter so far! Phew. That took a lot of effort! I hope this was okay, and at least a little humorous. See you in Chapter ten!
By Jedi-and
Disclaimer: I do not own TT, nor do I own Mr.Noel Collins but I DO own some of my own characters.
Note: Just so you know, in this fic Starfire is roughly 17-18 earth years old. She can have a baby if she wishes. Besides if you still are not happy with it, read the explanation in the last chapter.
Enjoy!
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Chapter 9: 1000 words, all Ouch (or words to that effect).
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Well I suppose you probably want to know what happened next.
After Robin found out about the turn of events that had occurred, him being the thief and all that had broken into Nigel's room (if it wasn't obvious enough already), he confronted Starfire, who confirmed his suspicions of thinking she might be... in trouble. Sadly, because of her alien DNA, no one could actually tell if she was or not. But while Nigel pondered this problem and ways of solving it, Robin and his other half (plus one?) tried to work things out, and she had been banned from doing any form of crime fighting until they knew for certain.
Unfortunately, Robin has also started to re-blame Nigel for keeping this a secret, even though it was at the request of Starfire herself. He never seems to catch a break when it comes to their leader, does he? He understood about the first time, as he DID attack her, but back then there was a war on. But this is just plain stupid. Then again, for all his talents Robin was still a teenager. Doing something stupid was practically their divine right.
Well, a few months have moved on since then. Nigel has been a Titan for around 5 months. In other news, Beast Boy and Charm have been steadily (though secretly) seeing each other, and it seems to be going well. She also (by appointment of Garfield Logan) is now an Honorary Teen Titan, much in the same way as Aqualad. This meant she wasn't on the roster, but could be called on when trouble was at hand.
Still no news of her brother though, who had eluded capture. Aqualad's help to try and find him also came up a big zero (Aqualad complained that all he had done since he became an Honorary Teen Titan was look for bodies to make sure villains were dead). One small favour though, as they found Nigel's wallet in the water. He had lots of precious metal coins that they had traded in for large sums of cash to help rebuild the tower.
In other local news the android that escaped Gotham city has still evaded incarceration and officials are becoming more and more worried for the citizens of other cities close to it, as it is a heavily armed piece of equipment. It was supposedly armed with the most powerful human-sized riffle in production (gee, ain't THAT a coincidence). The rifle of that calibre was usually mounted onto the top of an armoured car, but the android seems strong enough to be able to use it as a personal weapon, even while running. No more details regrettably.
"To the bridge, computer!"
And of course the ever-random return of one of the more laid back Titans: Robert Cantite, also know as Gauntlet.
"I am not the Star Trek computer, and we have no 'bridge' level." A mechanical voice came through the elevator as it started to ascend. Gauntlet shrugged a little and reminded himself to program a sense of humour into the Titan mainframe, with a little help from Cyborg.
Robert had just returned from what the Titans frequently refer to as the most boring part of the year, the annual conference of the financial side of heroism. Basically, a lot of lawyers talking to superheroes about the number of buildings they have destroyed to save the day and the cost of rent and damages. The whole thing took months, as every so often, and more likely than not, one of the superheroes would have to depart to save the world, or some randomness like someone attacking the hotel where they stayed, and sometimes the little things like 'borrowing' a bathrobe raised suspicions on identity and ability to be a hero in the first place. Gauntlet had tried his hardest to prove that the robe with the hotel insignia on it was a family heirloom, and the fact he had about seven or eight in his bag meant that he was carrying spares in case one got damaged.
Well, he had finally convinced them to let him go if he returned the robes and also paid attention at the meetings, which he did. To a degree. He returned the ones he stole; only to steal fresh ones by claiming someone else was stealing his. It was society paying him back for the long hours and lack of holiday or even a steady pay check. Oh, and the saving of the world thing as well.
What do you expect from a man who only got onto the Titans by court order?
He reached the living room via elevator and jumped out, singing his own theme tune, one arm outstretched in a super hero like pose.
"DA-DA-DA-DAAAA!!" He bellowed at the top of his lungs, waiting to be heard, and heard he was. Everyone in the tower heard him, and someone in the docks across from the Tower's island thought they had heard a yell, but then put it down to his schizophrenic delusions.
"Don't tell me..." Savior groaned, hoping for dear life that it wasn't the man he thought it was. He and Gauntlet didn't really get along. Okay that was an understatement: they NEVER got along. One was serious and intellectual, the other was a lad's lad, who joked and showed off.
Cyborg looked around and smiled as the last missing Titan returned.
"Okay, I won't tell you."
"What? You didn't miss me?" Rob asked, wrapping his arms around Noel, who quickly shrugged it off and jumped up and over to another seat, a look of pure disgust on his face. Great, Goofman was back. JUST what he needed.
"So, what ya get me?" Beast Boy asked, jumping around to face him, his usual huge smile splattered across his features.
"Who said I got you anything?"
"Dude, that's low..."
"I know, maybe these Grand Harbour Hotel bathrobes will cheer you up?" He said, holding out a shimmering white piece of cloth as he unfurled it to reveal the wonder of a five star hotel dressing gown, lined in gold and as soft as... a very soft thing (I would say snow, but spending a week falling over onto it I can tell you snow isn't as soft as they advertise...)
"One for you, one for you, even one for you grumpy!" He handed them out, throwing the one for Noel at him. Noel didn't even flinch as it landed right on his face; he just pulled it off and turned the page, ignoring him.
"Thanks." He muttered
"One for your bird too." Rob added. He threw another, but this time the Shimmer caught it and placed it gently on the side next to him.
"Don't call Raven my bird. She's not in a cage singing to me for birdseed."
"That's not what she was saying the last time I saw her!" Rob cracked. Noel had to resist every urge he had to grab Gauntlet and throw him out the window. He had to resist that urge at least three times in an average day with Rob.
Rob passed a robe to Robin, who was sat on the other side of the couch with another controller in hand, and then he came across someone who he hadn't seen before, who was also reading, but upside down in a chair. "And who are you?"
"I'm Scalpel, AKA Nigel Hastings, the newest Titan, it's a pleasure."
"I'm Gauntlet, the ex-newest Titan. Hey man, you usurped me! Oh well, have a bath robe anyway, even if I don't know who the hell you are. Usurper." He handed the alien one of the monogrammed gowns and turned back to the group.
"How exactly did you come by these? To my knowledge just one of these is worth over one hundred dollars." Noel questioned, looking at, in his opinion, the least trustworthy Titan, much less so than their latest edition. At least Nigel had been a soldier, and he understood the hardships of battle and this life. Rob never seemed to even REGISTER there were hardships, which greatly irritated Noel.
"Well...let's just say I felt it was time to be paid back for our hard work."
"Stolen." All the other Titans groaned.
"It's only stolen if they know its gone!" He argued. "Besides, they expect you to steal things! They said so on the Simpsons!"
"The Simpsons is a cartoon. This is real life." Noel said in not-so- pleasant tone.
"Anyway! The new guy!" Gauntlet said. He turned to Nigel, quickly changing subjects to get away from the stream of enquiries that was sure to follow. "How was the Hazing? Nice and painful I hope." He laughed, before there was a pause.
"Ha-zing?" Nigel asked, looking up from where he was, a confused look coming across where the smile used to be.
Then the boys (well, except Noel, who looked up and rolled his eyes as he realized what had just happened) grinned evilly at the sudden realization of it all.
He was never hazed.
Oh sure, he had been interrogated and proved himself in battle just fine, but never hazed. Which gave the boys something to do, and also gave them a reason to get back at everyone's favourite Blacktrinian. Robin wanted the chance to get even because of the secret kept between himself and his girlfriend. The duo of Cyborg and Beast Boy want to lay the smackdown on the doctor for all the times he has done that to them in the video game world (how the hell did he managed to work a controller so efficiently with only two fingers?). Gauntlet wants to because Nigel has managed to get away with being here as part of the team without being hazed. And despite his irritation at the whole concept, even Noel had a slight desire to do it: when Starfire's pregnancy was made public, Raven banned him from ever touching her again until she said so, which at this moment in time is still in effect (And she meant it. Just to test this theory he tried to get close to her, in a sort of 'let us see by touch' kind of way, and she promptly turned around and lifted him from her room via her magic, and locked the door. At least she didn't inflict any damage to his genitals) Normally, Noel could have lived with this...had he and Raven not started sleeping together shortly before Nigel had arrived (and it was a damn good reason. Jason Blood had called Raven and told him that while hunting through interdimensional realms had had stumbled onto the information that her father, weakened from the brutal battle he had had with the Titans, had been slain by another for his power. She was free of his curse forever. And since Noel had just gotten back from a task that had kept her separated from him for a long time...well, use your imagination). And while he was, unlike SOME people he knew, a slave to his hormones, he still liked doing it, and now he couldn't, and his blame for that has been placed on the doctor, as he can't blame Raven or the others.
Nigel, at this point, was now on his feet and looking very scared.
"Why do I now fear for my life?" He asked plainly, drumming on the arm of the chair lightly.
"Titans! Go!" Robin called as they (excluding Noel) dived at him. Luckily he countered and rolled backwards over the chair, meaning that Gauntlet and Cyborg ended up going face first into the base of the seat. Nigel flipped backwards and ran down the corridor past Starfire and Raven, who were making Kory the biggest sandwich ever made inside of the tower. It stood a full 7 bread slices high, and had everything from Starfire's favourite foods to random bits of Tofu left by Beast Boy. Raven didn't look too impressed.
"And a little bit here, and there, and we are done! Our wonderful piece of bread loaf intermixed with meats and dairies have produced a wonderful specimen, ready for the eating." She cooed, before attempting to lift the structure from the plate to take a bite from it. She then saw a red blur pass by, followed by lots of other blurs, followed by Noel, who was casually strolling after them, trying to act like he was above the whole deal.
"Friend Raven, correct me if I am wrong, but was that Nigel followed by the other Titans?" Kory questioned, pausing from the monumental snack in front of her. Raven, who had been reading, looked up.
"Didn't see."
Cyborg walked past, holding his hand above his eyes in the body language that said he was looking for someone. He was holding a cricket bat in the other, and was closely followed by Gauntlet.
"Well, well, the 'hero' returns." Raven commented, turning all the way around to face the pair.
"Have you seen Nigel? He needs hazing." Gauntlet replied. Raven was about to say no, but then she had a thought. Ever since Nigel arrived, she didn't remember ever giving him a hazing, as all members of the Titans had to participate. And the hazing was a tradition. Even SHE had endured one.
And admittingly, for as well as her cold exterior hid it, not allowing Noel near was starting to take its toll on her also...
Alas, she could not just simply let go of her principles, so she must take her frustrations out by other means, like meditating... and hazing. She liked that idea, oh she did indeed, because at that moment she levitated six cricket bats above her, slowly spinning them in a circle. Where did she get the cricket bats? Hey, I just work here.
Cyborg gulped as she ran forwards. Gauntlet was about to address Starfire on whether or not she wanted to join them, but he noticed the piece of clothing she happened to be wearing, and what it said. It was a pink T- shirt with white writing, and it said 'mother in training' and an arrow pointing to her stomach. It took nigh on three...seconds to him to work it out, and then he left to go find Nigel himself, which in turn left Starfire alone to try her best at the monster sandwich and take it easy.
Nigel, on the other hand, wasn't taking it easy at all. He was trying his hardest to escape the obviously persistent Titans who were in hot pursuit. Rounding a corner, Nigel found an old service hatch and kicked down on it at an angle, flipping it up into the air. Catching it, he jumped down the hole holding it above him, sealing it off as he fell for a bit and then landed in his room. He had found this by accident one day, when he was walking and he heard a hollow noise. Not thinking his plan ahead, he slammed his foot down hard and fell through into the room that was now his bedroom, seriously bruising his coccyx. And before you say anything that's the bone at the base of the spine that is also referred to as the tailbone. Get your minds out of the gutter. That's MY job. Heh heh. Ahem...
Now safely in the sanctuary of his own room, Nigel sighed and reached up for the cord that turned on the lights.
"That was too close." He breathed, clicking on the light.
"It was, wasn't it?" The doctor looked around, his eyes wide and then he saw them. Standing there were the rest of the Teen Titans, armed to the teeth with what looked like wooden battle clubs, each wearing a sadistic smile on their features (even Noel and Raven had an inkling of it, as much as they were trying to hide it and act like they were unwillingly getting dragged along).
The how's and the why's on exactly how they had all beaten him into his own room no longer mattered. All that did matter was escaping, and that killer Blacktrinian survival instinct told him one thing. When in a room this size facing that many opponents, there was only one thing to do.
Trap them, then escape.
And that he did. Using what little speed he could build up, he ran to the side and grabbed one of his long wall scrolls, jumping back over in a complete flip, wrapping up Beast Boy and Cyborg. He would have repeated that again, but the close proximity of his foes meant he could be grabbed anywhere, so the only thing to do was kick up his bed sheet into their faces and make a break for the door. As if that would work, but did it anyway, jumping up and over...
"Got you!" Gauntlet shouted, producing a barrier in front of him. He flew face first into this invisible wall, and then Noel and the Shimmer stepped in, wrapping up the Blacktrinian so he couldn't move.
"Why does life hate me?" He asked, sighing. The rest laughed to themselves.
Let the Hazing, begin!
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Throughout all the pain and hurt that the Titans had supplied, with all the fights and arguments and the blame placed on him, Nigel Hastings never once regretted joining the Titans.
Until now.
He was, at this moment in time, tied to a chair with the other Titans in front of him preparing what they called the Hazing ceremony. From what he had gathered from the conversations amongst themselves, he would be tested on his reflexes, endurance, honesty and commitment through a series of activities, most of which seems to involve the use of those dangerous looking, but non-lethal battle clubs. He sweatdropped and sighed. It was cruel enough to tie him up, but they had found his nighttime claw covers and used them so he couldn't cut through the bindings. What a predicament.
"No way! He HAS to be hazed now!"
Nigel looked back up as Gauntlet shouted what he had, before placing one 'club' in his mouth while holding two in each hand.
"Whoa there 'Suron', this isn't 'One Piece' and you are not with a pirate made out of rubber." Beast Boy said, holding back Titan number seven with a hand on his shoulder.
"Someone has been watching too much anime again." Raven stated as she made her way past them, her cricket bat held loosely in one hand, dragging it across the floor.
"Well aren't we Miss Know It All. Wait a sec, how did YOU know it was an anime?" Gar asked, pointing a white-gloved hand at the sorceress. Raven stopped in her tracks and turned around.
"...You said so."
"No I didn't, I said it was 'One Piece', I didn't say it was an anime, and only a handful in this area know of it because they don't stock it in the stores around here!"
"..."
"You've been anime binging in the night!" Cyborg called in realization, his hand pointing. Raven didn't have anything to say.
"Quick, get the doctor! She's in denial!" Gauntlet yelled in mock horror, as he ran around a little before Savior grabbed him with the Shimmer and ground him to a halt.
"He's over there." Noel pointed at Nigel.
"Who?"
"The doctor."
"Nigel is the new Doctor Who? Cool!"
Noel facevaulted.
Robin entered the room (strangely, via an air duct) and landed a little worse for wear but still whole. Although his clothes were a little charred and tattered, he seemed generally okay.
"Robin! Your safe return greatly pleases me!" Starfire hugged her other half, which was followed by the usual call of...wait for it...
"Air, Star! Air!"
She promptly let go, with her usual blush, and returned to her place in the line up. She had eaten the entire sandwich, with little or no trouble. She would have made another one but she was called to help the hazing.
Plus she had used up all the food in the fridge, blue and furry or not.
"So did you get it?" Rob asked.
Robin held up a golden rope with a knot in one end that doubled on itself in a slipknot or in layman's terms, a lasso. A golden lasso. Wonder Woman's golden lasso. Wonder Woman's golden lasso of truth if I have to get painfully obvious with you.
"It took me forever to find this, and then I had to break into the security systems to unlock it. Even then it was pretty tough to get it."
"But security codes for you, that's not problem right? You were trained by Batman in computers!" Beast Boy said, shrugging at what took him so long.
"The security system was designed by Batman!" Noel countered, expressing his point a little... vividly. Well he was a fan of the Dark Knight I suppose. Plus, he found the whole concept of breaking into the Watchtower just to take Wonder Woman's golden lasso of truth for the sake of a HAZING ritual absolutely asinine, almost offensive. That, and Rob hadn't had it happened to him because Robin hadn't been able to break in that time.
"Calm Noel, calm." Raven said, placing one hand on his shoulder.
"Yes dear." Noel replied, knowing he was in the majority.
"Woppah." Nigel said from the back of the room, in a plain voice. Noel arched an eyebrow, wondering what he had said. Maybe it was Blacktrinian. But if so, why was Beast Boy smiling? And Cyborg and Gauntlet?
"Someone has been watching Friends."
"It is a very amusing portrayal on human behaviour." The doctor said, giving a trademark grin and laughing.
"He is saying you are whipped my friend!" Beast Boy called, unable to stop himself from laughing. For those who don't know, 'Woppah' is the sound Chandler made when he said that someone was 'whipped'.
"I am NOT whipped!" Noel yelled. "She doesn't control me!" He pointed to Raven, who quickly and slyly bit his finger. "OW! What was that for!"
"Who is she? The cat's mother?" Raven replied.
"Don't do that! It completely undermines my point!"
"Did you ever have one to begin with?" Raven rumbled. It was her turn to get a little annoyed as she glared at her now slightly cowering boyfriend. All the while, Nigel was laughing his head off at the display of disorganisation and lack of cooperation. And it made him laugh, oh yes indeed it did, as soon he would not be laughing, but instead hurting from the head down. "Can we start now? I have things to do."
"Yeah, like making time for Savior to apologize for an hour, then an hour of making out to seal the deal." Gar said, once again opening his big mouth. Cyborg jumped in and covered it, but too late. Noel and Raven were both looking very unhappy.
Nigel too had shut up, afraid what a broody Goth girl who has been deprived of the newly discovered joys of sexual pleasure for a month might do to him. The whole pleasure/pain idea came back into focus. She had no physical pleasure, so she would cause him as much pain as humanly possible.
Oh joy.
---------------------------------
Blindfolded, they allowed their captive to stand up without restraints for the first of the tasks, 'The Ever Decreasing Circle', or in other words where all the Titans surround him and hit him with a paddle randomly, closing in. So they started, swinging in...
Unfortunately for them Nigel somehow jumped up and slashed at the first one, chopping it in half before he kicked away another. He disarmed one of the Titans and threw the paddle at another.
There was a pause. It was great when things went to plan, wasn't it?
"What just..." Cyborg asked, looking at his ruined paddle in disbelief.
"Did I pass?" Nigel asked, lifting off his blindfold to see the decimation he had wrought on his unsuspecting opponents.
"But how..." Beast Boy started, before he stopped and came closer to Nigel. "Has anyone ever noticed how large and pointed his ears are?"
"This is no time for ear envy Gar." Robin muttered grimly as he stood up, rubbing his sore jaw line from where the cricket bat had hit him.
"No, I know what he is getting at..." Noel stated, with Raven nodding.
"He can hear everything to the point that it's as effective as if he was seeing it with his own eyes." She noted. "He was able to disarm Star because he heard no footsteps, abet breathing, and assumed it was one of the women, who can both fly, so he went a little gentler on her. As for Cyborg he heard heavy footsteps and so disabled you by destroying your paddle."
Her voice obviously spoke the truth because of the wide grin of pride slapped onto the Blacktrinians face.
"So what do we do?"
"Get the earmuffs of DOOM!" Gauntlet shouted, raising his hand high with one of the few paddles left. The other guys, save Noel, who kept trying to talk to Raven and kept getting shoved away, agreed and they brought out a pair of pink earmuffs.
"I said OF DOOOM!"
Cyborg shrugged and wrote 'of Doom' on them before slapping them onto the Blacktrinian's head. With a worried expression on everyone's face, they started again, moving a little cautiously.
It wasn't necessary. This time he was helpless, and was therefore beaten relentlessly. Although he suffered less than Savior did when he had gone through this, he hurt much more than when Gauntlet had to do this. Blacktrinians are thick skinned, not impervious to pain.
"Now for the Unblinking Eye." Whack, whack, whack, whack, whack, whack.
"Now for the Crossing The Desert!" Whack, whack, whack, whack, whack.
"Owwwww." Nigel was starting to hurt.
"Oh stop it you baby. You had a blade shoved through you and before that you fell several stories and landed in water and the only thing that bothered you about that was that you couldn't swim. You can take a few blows with a paddle." Noel said.
"And now as a tribute to Savior, we have the Golf Swing of Dismay."
"What's the Golf Swing of..."
WHACK!!!
"DISSMMMAAAAAYYYYYY!!!!!!!!" Starfire had swung like there was no tomorrow and poor old Nigel was sent flying off into the sunset, or at least where it would have been there in a few hours. Unless you were in the Green Berets movie.
"I'm sooooo proud." Noel said sarcastically, faking a tear as Nigel disappeared. He landed around forty foot away, on the way passing through a random office building, going through one side and out the other to land in a large tree in a local park. He had cursed all the way there in his normal tongue and people thought there was some sort of monster coming down the road. Locals reported seeing something red and white flying through the sky. He was picked up 20 minuets later by Raven.
"You okay?"
"I hate you all." Was his only reply.
----------------------------------
After the equally disastrous 'leap of faith' they retired to do the twenty questions round. What made that round so awful in comparison to the first one? Well Nigel did as he was told and jumped, and whoever drew the short straw would catch him on his way down.
"You ready?" Cyborg had lifted up his earmuff to ask him.
"Yes." He replied honestly before jumping off the edge. Expecting to be caught any time soon.
Anytime.
Now would be nice.
Except up top they had forgotten who was supposed to catch him.
"It's suppose to be Star."
"In her condition? I thought it was Savior."
"Not me, it's my better half's turn."
"Whipped."
"Shut UP!"
"It's not me."
Splash.
"Oh shiatsu. It was me." Gauntlet said, holding up the short straw. They made their way over to the edge and looked down. "Do I have to save him?"
"I'd recommend it. He can't swim." Noel said.
Except Nigel, once he was near the ground, had struggled out of Gauntlet's grip and started running around the Tower to escape this madness. This time the Titans had had to chase him around for twenty minutes before they caught him.
So Nigel, now wet, sweaty, mad, and feeling like he cheated death yet again, was sitting in the living room, his arm tied to one of the chairs with the golden lasso. He had a piercing stare on his face, glaring at the Titans in a manner that could only be described as utter disgust.
"I said I was sorry!" Rob called, sitting cross-legged on the floor as Nigel's eyes came upon him. He had started to calm down a little, which was a good thing for the ex-con Gauntlet.
"Twenty questions!" Beast Boy said. Four of them were present for this round of Twenty Questions: Beast Boy, Cyborg, Robin and Starfire. Gauntlet was present but not allowed to ask any questions because of his major screw up earlier, and after running around trying to catch Gauntlet and getting all worked up, and finding themselves alone on the other side of the tower, temptation was just too much for Savior and Raven to fight off. Let's just say if they are not careful, there could be another baby on the way. Possibly a girl named Kyra (o-).
"Starfire, if you would be so kind to start."
The other hazing veterans groaned as they knew she would pick the most obvious questions, but I suppose they were a little necessary.
"What is your real name?"
"Nigicalnack Hastionfarlock, which is abbreviated to Nigel Hastings."
A screwed up expression speared onto the features of the humans in the room. How did his people pronounce that on a daily basis?!
"Where did you live?"
"Star, haven't we talked about this before?" Robin asked, patting her hand lightly before letting her continue. They had talked about the whole idea of Twenty Questions before, and to be honest she was a little confused, but it didn't bother her.
"I live on the Azubak moon in the Vegnerenom system, in a small picturesque village called Uintoe." He replied, smiling for the first time since the hazing began. Although this was his home now, he still liked the village and the people there, and more is the pity because they really did notice that he was gone, as every morning he would walk his same route to the pier, spend a few hours fishing and walk in casually late to the doctor surgery, only to be told off and told he was a lazy bum. He'd then work madly and cook some of the fish that night at the local bar to be raffled off as a free meal.
But let us not dwell on the past.
"I have been to that moon; it's very nice in the summer as it is not very hot." Starfire said, a wide smile on her face. "But I must ask you, if you ever had the chance to go back, would you?"
"It really depends on a lot of things."
"Why?"
"Wasted question!" Beast Boy groaned, falling over.
"Well one reason to go back would be so I could see my father and some of my friends. Another reason could be because I loved the fish on that moon. But it I ever went back there the military would find me and kill me in a very harsh way for desertion. So I would rather stay here on this quaint little planet, with my new friends... even if SOME let me FALL off a BUILDING." He glared once again at Gauntlet. There was a slight pause at what he had said, but they continued on anyway.
"If you could get hold of it, would you ever allow us to have Blacktrinian alcohol?"
Surprise was the only look on Robin's face at Star's question.
"It really depends, can you handle it?"
"We ask the questions around here." Robin cut in, not wanting to divulge that some of them can't handle a few pints of beer, let alone what his race's alcohol might be like. The question alone of 'can you handle it' posed a question of its strength. Not to mention that all the Titans were technically under the legal drinking age anyway!
"My turn!" Beast Boy called, really anxious to get in some good questions.
"No way! It's always me next!" His taller friend Cyborg replied, looking as if he wanted to start a fight. "Anyway, first question! If you had a piece of rope tied to a building and two people where falling, one being really thin, and the other being really fat, which one would you catch?"
"Both, all you have to do is swing while falling and you move in an arc, catching both." He beamed, having an answer for everything.
"Alright, are those real? Or are they the result of some experiment?" Cyborg said. He pointed to Nigel's claws.
"All Blacktrinians have these. They are given to the children when they are old enough, which is around one or two years of your time old I think. They are grafted onto the skin to protect our hands. Able to slice almost anything and yet cradle a baby at the same time. Both men and woman have these claws."
"Do you feel that you can be a vital part of this team?"
"Not vital, but I could help I feel with the increase of overpowered villains appearing now and again. That Lord fellow sounded very unpleasant. Though I seem very clumsy I can help... Did I just say that?"
"It's the truth lasso."
"Oh."
"Next question; have you ever played any musical instruments?"
"I used to play an instrument called the Fackla; I suppose the human equivalent would be the drums with the cymbols and the bass drum."
A little smile came across the face of the lads before Cyborg asked the last question.
"If you had a room, would it be facing the sun in the morning, afternoon, evening or not at all?"
"I do not understand the question."
"Too bad Cyborg, my turn!" Beast Boy jumped in quickly before Cyborg could clarify his question. As Savior did, Nigel didn't feel comfortable at all with Beast Boy at the controls of the truth lasso.
"What is the most embarrassing thing you have ever done?"
"I got, as you humans say, plastered against my will one night and I ended up suspended by my feet from a tall building on my home world singing about a cartoon character. It must have been a good night, as that is all I can remember of it..." He smiled, paused, then quickly frowned and buried his face in his free hand cursing in Blacktrinian. "I had never wanted to tell anyone that."
Laughs seemed to fill the room for a little while before the next question was to be asked.
"Wonder Woman or Black Canary?"
"Wonder Woman, got to love that figure..." He groaned. "Foolish truth lasso."
"What do you do in your spare time? Apart from videogames."
"I sharpen my claws, catch up on all the medical red tape you have neglected and generally relax any way I can. Oh, and I go fishing."
"Sharpen your claws?"
"Yes, it's the big blade I have in my room with the chair attached to it. It's very sharp and helps keep my claws keen. Question number five please."
"What?"
"You asked me about my Ylental, or claw sharpener. And now you just asked what I meant by the question four comment, which is all five of your questions used up."
Nigel beamed. He loved outsmarting Beast Boy. He had the most confused expression on his face anyone ever had, and then he just walked off.
"Right, I suppose it's my turn." Robin sat forward a little, pondering. "From what we have seen, you cannot swim. Is this just you or a race thing?"
"No one I know of can swim; we dare not go into the water because if we go to deep then we will drown."
"That doesn't mean you can't ever swim, right?" He asked, opening a palm. This seemed to make Starfire think about something as she had a look on her face of pure concentration.
"I wouldn't know."
"Okay, a serious question now. If I gave you an order which you disagreed with, would you follow it?"
"Yes if I understood it. I'd do it but I wouldn't like doing it, as you are the leader. But I wouldn't do it if I didn't understand."
"Right, and finally what are your feelings towards us in general? What do you feel when you look at us all?"
"Well I mainly feel an attachment to you. You are my new friends and although you may be complicated beings I feel I can trust you... mostly. Now un-strap me please, this is starting to cut into my skin."
"Well I suppose you pass. The egg question wasn't needed as you seem to eat anything." Robin untied the bindings and Nigel leapt up.
"FREE!"
"Not yet, we still have one round left."
Beast Boy came back as an octopus, carrying with him eight trays of one dozen soy-sauce bottles, each. Nigel's heart plummeted. He had to prove himself in one final task? This was getting old and repetitive.
"I ask that Starfire be removed from this activity, her condition and all."
"You speak as if she's ill. Or has Fearless turned Fearful for his baby's health?"
"Quiet you."
"Can we skip this round? I've already done this at the restaurant we went to a few months ago." Nigel sighed, wanting to now go and rest up.
"Besides there will be a monster in 5...4...3...2...1..." Nothing. Cyborg looked up and around, wondering what was going to happen, wondering if his watch was off. Then the alarm sounded. "So close."
"Monster?" Nigel asked.
"It's a sludge creature. The one that ALWAYS appears when we enlist a new member." Raven said, waiting at the computer, her make up a little smudged as she waited for the others with her other half.
"Mortimer?" Gauntlet asked.
"Yep." Raven replied. Robin was about to say something when he noticed something else. There was a slight pause before their leader broke the silence.
"Raa, you realise that you're wearing a skintight costume?"
"I always wear this."
"But this time you forgot your bra." Beast Boy pointed out.
She looked down and blushed before she ran off as quickly as possible, leaving the lads to fall over laughing. Looking unhappy, Noel got up. Gauntlet started to say something.
"DON'T. Or I'll whip YOU." Savior growled, the Shimmer forming into a nasty looking cat o'nine tails. He followed Raven back to her room, where another argument ensued on who was at fault for this. Raven ended it by throwing a book at Noel with her power.
"Why are you blaming ME? I take your clothes OFF, I don't put them ON, it's not up to me to dress you!"
"You should have said something!"
"I didn't notice!"
"Oh how typical."
"Look, forget this!" Noel yelled as Raven finished pulling her outfit back up. "Mortimer is back, we need to stop him, let's settle this later, lives are at stake! Now teleport us there!"
"You got THAT wrong." Raven said, and disappeared into the shadows.
"God dammit..." Noel said, and then a strange growling noise came out of his mouth as he tried to mimic one of the sounds he had heard repeatedly while Nigel was getting tortured, assuming it was a curse. Nigel nearly died laughing, and so did the others, when Nigel said Noel's human tongue had garbled it and basically told the curtains that he thought his own chest looked like a toilet. Noel just sighed and leapt out a window. Screw his fellows, he had to save the day.
Just another normal day in Titan tower. And as per usual, Starfire and Nigel where left behind. Starfire for obvious reasons and Nigel because he wasn't a fully fledged member yet. Both stood there, as if they had run out of energy, their limbs hanging limply as they swayed slightly.
"What about us?" They asked, before sighing. "Humans."
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Longest chapter so far! Phew. That took a lot of effort! I hope this was okay, and at least a little humorous. See you in Chapter ten!