Dearest Diary,
Today was a very bad day. Early in the morning, friend Robin woke us all up, and told us that we were to join him for battle practice. After two hours of yelling at us, friend Robin got so angry that he stomped back up to his room, where I could here him lock the door. Friend Robin's sour mood did the "rubbing off" on everyone else, because friend Cyborg left the training room shortly after Robin, friend Raven left to meditate, and friend Beast Boy began to do the "Whining." This was not very enjoyable, so I found myself making a 'sweet' lunch for out leader to lighten his 'sour' mood. Before I could accomplish this, the alarm rang and I could here friend Robin calling us into the tower's main room. When I arrived, the others were already inhabiting the couch, waiting for what Robin had to say. But friend Robin didn't have to say anything. For everything, even the way his cape hung around his shoulders screamed
'SLADE.'
This is when the day became horribly wrong. The crime in itself was not difficult to stop. It was merely Cinderblock attacking the bank. This would not have concerned me greatly if Robin was acting normally. It appeared to me that friend Robin's mind was somewhere completely different as we did battle. It seemed as though every chance he got, he would peer out of the corner of his eyes, searching for someone who wasn't there. Because of this, I found myself looking out for friend Robin more than myself. Though this is no excuse, it is the reason why I accidentally put my own life in danger, as well as many other people. It is also the reason why Raven got hurt.
It all seemed to happen very fast. I was watching friend Robin attack Cinderblock's head, when Cinderblock, in an effort to remove Robin, banged into street polls and turned over cars, filling me with great worry over friend Robin's safety. I believe I consumed myself too much into thinking of this, to see the very large poll flying in my direction. Before this could hit me, friend Raven stopped it with her powers, but by doing this, she left her back open for Cinderblock to strike a hard blow. After a little while more fighting, we were finally successful in the capturing of Cinderblock, but because of my carelessness, he almost escaped. It is my fault. Friend Raven was easily able to heal herself, but I feel a very, very sad feeling inside me, and there is a little mocking voice, asking me why I joined the Titans anyway. What use am I if I can't protect my teammates? This is one of the times when I wish to be an 'earth girl' and live a 'normal' life. I have not conversed with friend Robin since my failure to properly catch Cinderblock. I am very afraid of what he'll say. Somewhere deep down inside of me that mocking voice is telling me of how Blackfire would have made a wonderful Teen Titan—much better than me.
The time is very late now, and I am wondering if I should retire to bed at all. Either way, I believe I will stop writing.
Starfire