Hello Everybody! If you're on drugs, feel free to believe I own Naruto. If your mind is not impaired by Hallucinogens or any thing else of this sort, I feel obligated to inform you that I do not own Naruto. (The way I see it is that if you're on drugs, you aren't really in any condition to take legal action against me, but if you're not, well, you are! So, don't sue me...)
A/N: Okay, guys, I think I have a connection streaming from my neighbor's house or something, because I am connected to the internet right now! At my house! If this loads weird or something, sorry, I'll reload it in a week when I'm back in school. Thanks for the patience. (I'm gogint ot have to stay out of school to heal from surgery, in case you're wondering.) This said, I will now make a memo to my reviewers... I have decided that making up a different treat for every reviewer is far too difficult for me, considering my complete and utter laziness, so I will now give the same thing to every reviewer each chapter, unless you've said something that makes me particularly happy (such as reviewing one chapter twice, or it's your birthday or something). Please don't feel like you're not special anymore, because you are. I'm just running out of ideas. If any one is lactose intolerant (sp?), please tell me, so I can refrain from giving you dairy products... or don't tell me, because you think I'm lame for caring so much about imaginary treats... –sweat drops- Either way. This said, I will now thank my reviewers.
coriander: I know that part at the end wasn't really necessary (what part of the book was...shudder) but I thought it was far from the most disturbing scene. I thought the part where they were fucking Tran with the corkscrew was pretty icky, or the part where they dissected Tran, or...never mind, there're far too many disturbing parts to pick one. For some reason, despite the absolutely disturbing content, it's one of my favorite books. (Is there something wrong with me?) Poppy Z. Brite is actually one of my favorite authors... I'm a big fan of Drawing Blood and Lost Souls. Anyways thanks for the review, I'm glad you liked the chapter. The treat for today is brownies. (Whew! That was long... This is why we never get me started on Poppy Z. Brite. Tee Hee –sweat drops-)
AlterEthereal: I thought it was kind of sweet, if I do say so myself. I couldn't stand waiting any longer to have them hug again... although I wish they would do more. (Damn my determination to take it slow! –bangs head against wall-) As for the pants... There's a reason I've made eighty percent of Sasuke's wardrobe leather and wife beaters. It's meant to appease the readers who are waiting for SasuNaru... you know, distract you with pure Sasuke sex mania! Anyways, thanks for reviewing, and since I've started giving away one group treat, today's group treat is brownies. Enjoy!
Lady Lemonade: No, you don't REALLY have to be seventeen to buy these books (although I'm sure there're rules about like porn mags, I'm only fifteen...) but they're disturbing enough that you should. I would be really sad if that were actually a law, though. Also, I love making them hug! I'm glad you enjoy my story, and as for the song, did you mean "God Called In Sick Today"? Because I'm pretty sure that's the only one I mentioned... Please tell me if that's the one you meant in the next review (shameless plug). As for the technique thing, I'm only changing it while they're together constantly. Once they're back staying in their own houses, I'll switch back. I know I gave you brownies last time, but since I've started doing the one treat for everyone, I'm giving out brownies again. I hope you don't start hating them because I'm giving you so many. –Sweat Drops- Enjoy!
KShindou25: I'm glad you liked this chapter! You seem fine to me, if not a bit hyper. I've seen far my psychotic behavior (from myself and others). Anyways. I'm glad you liked it, thanks for the review. Today's treat is fresh baked brownies! Enjoy!
angelicyokai: Ooo! New person. I love your name, by the way. Very cool. I'm glad I'm not the only one who loses their deodorant (not that I wish deodorant loss on you, it's just god to know I'm not alone.) I'm glad you thought it was funny, and I'm glad to know you think Sasuke is sexy. It baffles me that some people don't! Anyways, thanks for your review, and here are some fresh baked brownies for you!
Hieisbestbuddy888: I'm sorry! I don't mean to push it in your face, I'm sorry! But at least it was short right! The way I lose my deodorant is by using it and hen just tossing it on the floor and not paying attention to where it lands. –sweat drops- I'm glad you liked the chapter, and while I have heard "She Will Be Loved", I'm not a Maroon Five fan. That's not to bash them, they just don't float my boat. But! I am glad hey enhanced the reading experience for you! I can appreciate that. Thanks for reviewing...here are some gooey, tasty, fresh baked brownies for you!
Kyuubi-kun: This review makes me glad that I don't have to take the bus... and it also makes me glad I'm not the only one who loses their deodorant. As for Sexy with a capital S... I was thinking more along the lines of SEXY in all caps. Maybe that's just me. I sort of have a goth punk inclination. –Sweat drops- Anyways, I'm glad you liked the chapter, and thanks for the review. Here are some brownies for you!
Yugi-obsessed: I know I'm being rather mean to Naruto, but it makes the comfort from Sasuke all the much more fun...doesn't it? That's what I was going for at least. Hmmm... Never mind. Thanks for reviewing, and you are in luck, because today's treat just happens to be brownies! I hope you enjoy.
Koushirou Uchiha: I'm glad you liked the chapter, and you are welcome for the cookies. I love it when people tell me my stuff is good –strokes giant ego- it makes me feel good... Anyways –looking ashamed of her ego stroking- Thanks for the review. Here are some brownies for you!
Dancing-Neko-Shikigami: Oooo! New person! With an awesome name too! I'm glad you like my story, and I'm so glad I'm getting such a positive response to my deodorant losing problem. Before I posted this I thought I was the only one who ever lost their deodorant. As for the shelf or drawer thing, I usually put mine on a shelf, but it gets knocked off pretty quickly. My room is a mess. –sweat drops- Anyways, thanks for the review. Here are some brownies for you!
MeLaiya: Wow! I'm getting so many reviews from people who haven't reviewed yet. I'm so happy! And I'm glad you're enjoying the story. Thanks for the review. Here are some brownies for you!
miss.maniac: Yes, about the titles, they aren't really supposed to make any sense. I think I've mentioned that four or five times in my author's notes... but alas, it would seem some people just don't care what the author has to say. Naw, I'm just kidding. I don't suppose they're really meant to make sense, though. I just think it's fun trying to find lines from songs to use. I'm glad you like my story anyways, though. Thanks for reviewing. Here are some brownies!
Juu: Hey, I'm perfectly okay with not getting a review from everyone every single chapter... I'm just happy to have repeat reviewers. It makes me feel like I have loyal readers, which I guess I do. It's nice. –stops to enjoy the fans- Okay, I'm done being egotistical. I guess you're right about Naruto usually being the clueless one... I guess I'm just different. I'm glad you're enjoying it, and I can't promise I won't be mean to Naruto, but I'll always make up for it! Thanks for all the reviews! Here are some fresh baked caramel, Mississippi Mud brownies. Enjoy!
Machi: Wow! That's very high praise. I think I feel my ego inflating... I'm so ashamed. I sort of feel Naruto's pain too, though not in the same way. My best friend in seventh grade decided we could only be friends in private, so I dumped her and said to hell with it too. Now I have great friends. I suppose it's not really the same, but whatever. I'm glad you're liking my story. Thanks for the review, and here are some fresh baked brownies. Enjoy!
coriander: Yay! So many people have the same deodorant problem as me. I'm so hapy that I'm not the only one. I'm also glad you liked the chapter. Here are some brownies for you! I hope you enjoy.
cheeseboi: I'm glad you're enjoying my story so much, and no it's not the end. I promise I will put a very distinct "The End" or "Owari" or something when the end comes. Thanks so much for the review. Here are some brownies for you. Hope you like.
Now! With all of these lovely people thanked, I will proceed with the story. Oh! Wait, I'm reverting to the old style with POV switching... sorry if you like it better the other way. I guess I'll just be mixing the two the whole time. –sweat drops- Anyways. Here is chapter seventeen.
But Home Is Nowhere...: All Of Us Are Searching For An Open Arm
Naruto was smiling brilliantly when he pulled away from Sasuke, his mood lifted considerably. For some reason, the Uchiha seemed to have that effect on him. It was nice. "Do you know what we have first period today?" he asked quietly, his eyes happy, and his tone bright. He watched as Sasuke rummaged around in his bag for a moment, producing a piece of paper.
Sasuke unfolded the paper quickly and scanned over it. "Creative Writing." He sounded as happy at that fact as Naruto was. Creative Writing was becoming one of his favorite classes. He waited for Sasuke to put his schedule back in his bag, and then he turned down the hall towards the classroom.
"Do you think we'll read today?"
"Probably. That's what we usually do."
"Yeah, I guess you're right." Naruto shrugged and slipped into his seat. He leaned over and dug through is backpack for his binder and spiral. Upon finding these, he sat back up and began flipping through the spiral, trying to decide if he should read the poem he actually wrote the night before, or something from his personal stash. In the end he decided to stick with the one he'd already censored.
"Is that all poetry?" Sasuke's voice was soft, mildly surprised, and he had a gentle smile on his face.
"Yeah, I write a lot in my spare time. It's how I release stress." He smiled sheepishly, hoping that didn't sound as cliché as he thought it did. Sasuke just kept smiling at him. Naruto was about to get offended when Sasuke gave a barely audible,
"Me too."
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Sasuke very nearly fell out of his chair when the bell rang, and was just recovering from the shock when Mr. Kakashi walked in. The teacher was wearing the same mischievous smile that seemed to be his only facial expression, and Sasuke once again felt nervous. He loved this class, and its teacher, but for some reason that man just had a way of making him nervous. Perhaps it was because he still wasn't used to sharing his writings with so many people. He didn't really know.
He was drawn from his thoughts when Mr. Kakashi began to speak, "Today, we are going to read as usual, but instead of starting with one of you, I am going to read something I wrote. I know I said on the first day that I would be reading as well, and I thought today would be a good day for me to start, now that we've established a class dynamic." He seemed unfazed by the sea of blank stares that had now become the common response to anything he said. Sasuke found himself leaning forward in his desk, attention piqued.
"I must say, it's not one of my best pieces, but I thought it would be a good one to start with. It's a poem I wrote a long time ago about something that was happening to me. Feel free to comment when I'm done." He turned around and pulled a piece of paper out of his notebook. Sasuke listened closely as he read.
"Weep for bloody stars
Pull the strings forth from the heart
Coat the cross with liquid life
Nails pierce every bone
Clenching slowly as I die
Crucify our love
The world is lost within its shame
And as it fades I'll die" (1)
No one said anything, and Sasuke's mind was racing. He was surprised, just as everyone else seemed to be, and he wondered what exactly the poem was about. It sounded like something he could relate to. Just when the silence was about to become unbearable, Mr. Kakashi gave a sarcastic,
"I see you've all gone suddenly mute. It's too bad. I was so hoping to have a lively discussion."
Out of the corner of his eye, Sasuke saw a hand shoot up. It was Naruto's. Mr. Kakashi nodded at the blonde, indicating that he should speak. "It kind of seems like whatever was going on was a coming of age thing. You know, a turning point in your life."
Mr. Kakashi looked surprised, but was smiling anyway. "You are exactly right Naruto. I wrote this in response to one of the most important moments of life." Someone else raised their hand and asked what happened, and Sasuke watched as the teacher's smile vanished. "That is something that is very hard for me to talk about, so before I tell you, I think there is something else I should say. This class is different than other academic classes because it requires you to be involved on a higher emotional level. My one expectation in this class is that everything you produce comes from something important inside of you. I don't expect anything incredibly deep or revolutionary, but I do expect you to put your soul into everything you write. (2) The only reason I have for sharing with you is because I expect you to do the same. Is that understood?"
This time, he had the attention of every student in the classroom, and they all nodded fervently.
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Naruto found himself sitting on the edge of his seat, concentrating hard enough to give himself a headache. He wanted to know what had happened, and he feared he might miss it if he paid any less attention. For a moment there was silence, and then Mr. Kakashi began to tell his story.
"When I was seventeen, I realized I was gay. Yes, you heard me correctly, I am gay, and while I'm sure some of you will probably be very unhappy about this, I'm afraid you're going to have to live with it, because it really doesn't affect you in any real manner, and I'm sure as hell not going to change. This, however, is not my point. The point is, when I realized this, it was because I had met someone, and once I had come to terms with myself, he became my first boyfriend." He paused for a moment, seemingly saddened by the memory.
"For about a year, I was naïve enough to think that everything was fine, and I found myself wondering why everybody was always on about the horrors of intolerance. It seemed to me that there was nothing to fear, because thus far, no one had done anything to him or me. Unfortunately, my sad confidence in the world led to my insistence on telling our parents, and then everyone else. He was reluctant, but agreed with me because , as he told me, he loved me.
"This was our first mistake. Our parents were far less accepting than I had expected, and even went so far as to pull me out of my school in the middle of my senior year and place me in a private school. We were ever aloud to see each other again after we told my parents. Unfortunately for me, though, people still knew where I lived, and they had managed to figure out what was going on. The day I figured out what exactly everyone meant when they said that people were intolerant of gays, I came home to a burning house, a dead family, and the word fag tagged across the street in front of my driveway in pink.
"It took me an entire month to successfully comprehend what had happened. It was on that day that I wrote this poem. For three years after that, I didn't talk to anyone, and I didn't tell anyone about me. It wasn't until my senior year at college, when I learned that not all people are as intolerant as some that I became a person again. And now, after eight years, I am able to stand here and read you this poem, and talk about the things that happened to me and not break down crying. I hope you will realize that this is a very important part of my life, and I hope that you will respect everyone in this class who is able to share the way I have. (3)"
Everyone was speechless.
"Does anyone else feel like sharing what they wrote last night?" Mr. Kakashi looked around the classroom. Naruto looked over at Sasuke, whose hand was snaking slowly into the air, almost timidly, as if he weren't sure he really wanted to read. "Sasuke, finally volunteering for yourself, huh? Very good."
Sasuke's hand came down immediately, as if he were ashamed to be caught with it raised. Mr. Kakashi smiled at him. "Well, what are you waiting for? Read on, mighty poet!" Naruto smiled at that, suddenly imagining Sasuke in Shakespearian clothes, complete with the tights, poofy pants, and feathered hat. (4)
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Sasuke opened his binder slowly, and flipped to the page with the poem he'd written the night before on it. He was already regretting volunteering, desperately searching for an excuse to back out. 'I can't believe I volunteered. I'm such an idiot.' When he reached the poem and still hadn't thought of anything that would get him out of reading, he shook his head at himself and took a deep breath. After a moment, he began reading.
"Fire burns inside of me
Sweltering and hot
Kiss the rose
And the thorns will tear savagely
Your lips will bleed as you pull away
Taste the liquid death
The fluid you cannot live without
Nothing is what it seems
And you'll cry when you finally see
We all cry
It is our nature" (5)
When he finished, there was a moment of silence, and then Naruto said quietly, "I like it."
Sasuke looked at Naruto, his hands shaking slightly from the anxiety caused by reading, and smiled. He felt calm now. The blonde seemed to have that effect on him.
"Why don you like it, Naruto? Don't just say you like it." Mr. Kakashi was smiling again. Sasuke found himself not really caring why Naruto liked it, but still wanting to hear.
The blonde looked at the class for a moment, and then turned back to Sasuke. "I like it because it speaks to the harsher side of the world that most people don't really see. I'm not sure what it's meant to be about, but when I hear it, I hear the story of my life." Naruto was looking straight at him, not speaking to anyone else in the classroom. It was a weird feeling, because Sasuke knew everyone could hear what the blonde was saying, but it seemed like there was bubble around them that no one would be able to break. "I see the deceiving beauty of the rose every day in a way I'm not sure everybody can, because most people aren't hated. And it seems to me that if some of those people who only see the roses in the flower shops that have no thorns saw real roses, they would cry." He looked back towards the front of the classroom. "At least, that's what I thought when I was listening. I don't know what the mighty poet meant to say."
Mr. Kakashi was smiling again. "Okay then. That was excellent commentary Naruto. Now that we've heard a third person interpretation, Sasuke, why don't you give us your interpretation of wha you've written?"
Sasuke very nearly gulped. He gave the teacher a 'Please don't make me do this' look, but Mr. Kakashi just nodded, his gaze landing half on Naruto and half on Sasuke. Sasuke took a deep breath and turned to Naruto, hoping to create the bubble again. The blonde looked straight back at him. "You are exactly right. The poem is about the darker side of the world that most people don't see. When I was writing it, I was thinking about the way people look at me as nothing more than a pretty face, and I was attempting to relate how I feel when the fact that I have a mind and a heart is ignored. I'm sure you were thinking of a completely different darkness in the world, but I think the concept of being ignored is part of both of our interpretations of the poem." He stopped for a second, smiled weakly at Naruto and broke the bubble again. "There are many other things I was thinking about when I was writing this poem, but if I were to explain every little thought that was going through my head as I wrote this, we would all be very bored."
Mr. Kakashi nodded at him, his eyes sparkling with delight. "Thank you for sharing your poem and your response to Naruto's interpretation." He brought his gaze back over the entire room and became extremely cheerful. "So! Who else wants to share?"
TBC...
A/N: Okay. That was it. I hope you liked it. I know I didn't update yesterday, but as I said at the beginning, writer's block. I hope this chapter wasn't too disappointing. I really have no idea where it came from. I suppose there's not much else to say. Song title is from "All Of Us" by Blindside. Thanks for reading.
Valete... (That's Latin for good bye.)
ISANs
1. Hmmm... Not sure what I have to say about this, but every time I put a poem in, I feel this insane need to defend myself. I guess I'll just say sorry if you don't like it, and I'm sure it makes Kakashi completely OOC, but, what can you do, right?
2. This is kind of how I view writing, especially poetry. I think that if you're not going to really put yourself into your writing, then you don't have the right to do it. I don't mean to sound harsh here, but even if it is just fanfiction, I think that writing is the sort of thing that sucks if you don't put yourself into it. So...yeah. I hope that doesn't make me sound really self righteous or something. Because I'm not trying to be. So, yeah.
3. Okay, I have no idea where this came from. I don't want to get your hopes up about me doing a side story with Kakashi, because I won't. I might make him like a mentor to Sasuke and Naruto as their relationship develops and stuff, though. I'm not sure. I guess the point of this little nte is, I have no idea where this came from.
4. Okay, I just thought this was funny. With the poofy pants... Never mind
5. Insane need to defend... Please don't kill me for my insecurity.
P.S. Hmmm... I've just realized that I've quite posting warnings at the top. I guess the first however many chapters were enough, though, because I haven't gotten any complaints. I guess I'll just quit the warnings all together.