Hello everybody. From now on, we're just going to imagine that I'm wearing a sign that says "I don't own Naruto" on it. This way, I can quit writing these stupid disclaimers, and you can still know that I don't own Naruto. Sound good to you? Too bad if it doesn't. –sticks out tongue and unhappy readers- Booya!
A/N: Okay guys, I know this chapter had taken me many days to write, but I got so caught up in reading fiction that I went for three whole days without writing, and then I was really stuck in my writer's block, so forgive the badness! I am incredibly excited, though, because I've broken a hundred reviews! I'm gonna thanks all the reviewers now, but they won't be in order, because I'm working from my inbox instead of the page (which is refusing to load, damn it!) So anyways, today's treat is cookies. Here goes.
SasuNaru-kun: I'm glad someone thinks the foofy pants are as funny as I think they are. When I thought of that, I just sat there for a minute, and then burst out laughing. I had to put it in there. Anyways, I'm glad you liked, here are some cookies for you. Enjoy.
Cheeseboi: I'm glad you like it, and I'm glad I didn't sound too self righteous in the note about putting your soul into writing, or f I did, I'm glad people agree with me! I'm glad you liked, and you're welcome for the brownies! Thank you for the review. Here are some cookies for you!
Hieisbestbuddy888: First thing I need to address is the question about the poems. Yes I write my own poems, and I will take the comment as a compliment, since it is pretty high praise. If I were getting my poems from somewhere, I would credit whoever wrote it in the author's notes (like my chappie titles). Second. I took a creative writing class in eighth grade, and I hated it, so this is the way I think the class should have gone. There's a creative writing class at my high school, but it's only for seniors (poo...) so I have another two years before I can take it again. This makes me kind of sad, but I guess I just have to say oh well! Third thing. What little dude? I'm a little confused about that, and about the two teens. Fourth. I'm so proud of you! I always get like B's on Latin, but I will never be offended when someone is bragging about their grades. I'm just like Yay for them, at least someone can do it. So congratulations. Fifth and last. I like my Naruto fic WAY better than the driveling mass of crap that is my Trigun fic, do don't feel bad saying you do too. I won't be writing anymore Trigun for a very long time. I know this update took longer than usual, but it's still pretty timely if I do say so myself. Thanks for the very cool, very long review. (And the second almost as long review) Here are some cookies for you. Hope you like.
Yugi-obsessed: That has to be one of the weirdest reviews I've ever gotten. I don't think anyone has ever sat on my head before... Hmmmmm. Nope, you're the first. Hope there's a good view. I'm glad you're liking the story. Thanks for the review. Here are some cookies for you!
HikariChang: I'm glad you're enjoying (even though you were only on chappie 3 when you reviewed). Thanks for the review. Here are some cookies for you!
Queen of the Paperclips: Ahh! You read my mind with Kakashi/Iruka thing. I was actually thinking of them as a couple through this entire thing, and I've just been debating whether or not I'm too lazy to actually write on them. I can't promise anything, but feel free to consider them a couple while reading. As for Sasuke OOC... what can I say? He has to be nice and open for this fic to work. Oh well! As for the review for Trigun... I know it was a driveling mass of disgustingness... I'm not particularly fond of that piece. Don't know why I posted it. Oh well. As for the name/life thing, very cool! This makes my day, and I must say, I love your pen name (have I said that already). Yay! Thanks so much for the review, and here are some tasty cookies for you!
Lady Lemonade: I'm glad you liked it so much, and hopefully, you'll like this product of Writer's Block just as much! As for you liking the song...YAY! Someone else in the world likes a song by AFI. Woo hoo! I'm also glad you like my poems, and I know I shouldn't really care if someone doesn't like them, it's just this insecurity I have. Oh well. What can ya do? Anyways, thanks for the review. Here are some cookies for you.
AlterEthereal: Good luck with your surgery! What's it for? (If it's not too embarrassing to say... if it is, I have to get a cist removed from my ass...that should make you feel better. It took three tries. ;)) Anyways, now that I've completely embarrassed myself, I'm glad you appreciate the Sexy Sasuke, and I'm glad you like the poetry. Thanks for reviewing, here are cookies. Fresh Baked!
Chronoclockxvii: I'm glad you're liking it, and I know new SasuNaru is hard to find. It's kinda sad, but we all manage somehow. ;) Anyways, thanks for reviewing, and here are some cookies for you!
ElizabethMarieRose: -sniff- Thank you so much! What an eloquent review, and so nice! I'm glad you appreciate my plot development, because I really am trying to keep it real. Really! All I want to do is throw into bed together, or better yet in the shower, but I can't because I'll disappoint myself. Thanks so much for this review. You've made my day, so you get cookies and brownies. Enjoy.
Ever13( ): Wow! That's high praise. There're a lot of High school fics out there in this lovely little fandom. I feel honoured. Is my typing really that bad? I really try to pay attention. The reason I have no beta reader and short chapters is because I usually update daily or every other day (not this time, but usually). Hmmm. I'll think about getting a beta reader. Thanks for the input. Here are some cookies for you!
Dancing-Neko-Shikigami: Boy do I know what you mean about the between the sheets with Kakashi thing. That man is tasty. Anyways, I'm glad you liked the chapter, and I'm glad you like the teacher student interaction. Thanks for the review. Here are some cookies for you!
Wow! That's everybody, I think. If I left anyone out, I'm deeply sorry, like I said, the page won't load on , so I'm going through my inbox... One might be out of place or something. But anyways, thanks for you're patience. Here is chapter 18. Enjoy
But Home Is Nowhere...: These Eyes Have Seen No Conviction
Naruto and Sasuke were standing motionless before Naruto's open refrigerator, their faces twin masks of disappointment. "What the hell are we gonna eat?" Naruto said quietly. Sasuke ruffled his hair.
"We could order pizza?" His hand was still on Naruto's head, resting there as if it were the most natural thing in the world, and for some reason, Naruto just let him keep it there. It seemed to be the right thing to do.
"That sounds okay. What kind do you like?" He shut the fridge, moving across the room and towards the phone on the wall.
Sasuke let his hand fall to his side, and he looked deep in thought when Naruto looked back at him. "Um... Cheese?"
Naruto snorted. "All that thought for cheese?" He shook his head and picked up the phone. "I was actually hoping you'd say that. I don't really like anything else." Sasuke just smiled at him.
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Five minutes later, Naruto hung up the phone, having ordered a large cheese pizza and an order of cinnamon sticks. "It's gonna be an hour before it gets here. Do you wanna finish our English thing?"
Sasuke thought it over for a moment, remembering that they had been unable to complete their daily assignment in class, since the teacher had spent forty five minutes explaining the requirements, leaving them five to begin. They were each supposed to come up with five questions for the other to answer, and they were to write down exactly what the other said in response. If the person answering wasn't comfortable with the teacher reading an answer they had given, it was permitted that this be written as their answer. If they were not comfortable answering the question at all, then their partner was to come up with a new question.
"Alright. Do you want to ask or answer first?" Sasuke watched as Naruto thought about it.
"I'll ask."
Sasuke cringed. He knew he was going to have to answer either way, but he'd been hoping to put it off a little further.
He was extremely nervous as he followed the blonde into the living room. They sat down on opposite ends of the couch, facing each other, backs to the armrests. Naruto was holding a binder, seemingly produced out of thin air, and he was scowling a little. "Alright," he said quietly. "Before I start, please don't be offended by anything I ask, okay?" He smiled sheepishly at Sasuke.
Sasuke nodded, "Promise." It seemed Naruto's smile was contagious, because he was wearing it now.
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"Alright. First question." Naruto's heart was beating fast, half from anticipation of the answers he would receive, and half from fear that Sasuke would hate him by the time this was over. Sasuke had a pensive look on his face, and was waiting patiently for the questioning to begin. Naruto took a deep breath. "From your perspective, what is it like to be beautiful?"
Sasuke looked shocked, his eyes wide, and his jaw slightly slack. Naruto hoped he hadn't offended him already. "To be beautiful? Like in the eyes of the world?" Naruto nodded. Sasuke was silent for a moment, his chin resting on his knees. "From my perspective, being beautiful is the worst thing you could ever wish on someone. I know many people would say that the worst way to be viewed is to be hated, but in my mind, being beautiful and being despised are one in the same. My life is filled with hundreds of admirers who look at me and see what a pretty face I have, and then worship me for it. Unfortunately, they fail to recognize that I am a person, and that I do have a heart and a mind. I am viewed as a mannequin, placed here for the viewing pleasure of the world, and if I try to have feelings, people hate me for it. And that's what hurts the most. People that hate me for expressing myself, because it destroys their fantasy."
Naruto had been furiously scribbling the whole time, attempting to catch every word Sasuke was saying while trying to let it sink into his brain. When he stopped writing, and his brain had finally caught up with him, he was silent. He was shocked, and hurt. Here was this person, this perfect, popular king, who had everything he'd ever dreamt of, and he was forced to discover that the grass was dead on the other side of the fence too. For a moment he thought about this, turning his disappointment over in his mind. Then he realized that this was not why it hurt to hear Sasuke's words. It hurt because it was Sasuke saying them, which meant that it Sasuke hurting. Sasuke hurting made him hurt.
He looked up at Sasuke, his mind jumbled. "I like it when you think," was all he could think to say. Sasuke smiled sadly at him, his expression conveying a silent sort of thanks. They were silent for a few minutes, and then Naruto spoke again. "Maybe, we should switch off. You ask me a question now."
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Sasuke nodded, a little numb from his speech, and still surprised at the question. Or maybe it wasn't so much the question as the way the blonde had phrased it. 'What's it like to be beautiful?' Did that mean Naruto thought he was beautiful? For a moment, he wondered, forcing himself not to ask if he cared. He knew what his answer would be anyways. "Can I borrow a sheet of paper?"
Naruto pushed the entire binder towards him, hanging on to the sheet of paper he'd been scribbling on. Sasuke opened to the very back, pulled a piece out and placed it on the hard surface of the notebook. "Alright. Since I promised not to get offended, you have to promise not to get offended, okay?" The blonde nodded mutely. "Okay." Sasuke was silent for a moment, contemplating how best to word what he was about to say. In the end, he had no idea.
"I'm no sure there's any delicate way to put this, so I'm just going to say it. I know about the things that happened in the past, but I also know that you're too young to be taken out of the system, so I was wondering how exactly you've come to live on your own." Sasuke was speaking slowly, his voice soft and unobtrusive. For a moment, Naruto looked stunned, his eyes wide and almost scared. "You don't have to answer if you don't want to!" He said this quickly, suddenly afraid that the blonde was reliving some horrible memory that he had no right to bring up.
Naruto shook his head. "No. I'll answer, but I'd appreciate if Mr. Iruka didn't see."
Sasuke nodded. "Of course."
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Naruto took a deep breath, attempting to calm his suddenly frazzled nerves. He really didn't want to answer this question, but he felt compelled to anyways. Sasuke had answered honestly, so he would to. "When my parents...died, I was only two. They left me alone in the word with no one but the 'system' to turn to, and I guess I would've been dead without it. I had no other living relatives, save for one uncle on my mom's side, and he didn't want me. After all, nobody wants the son of a bunch of Psychopaths, right? The state gave me to him anyways." Naruto paused, his throat constricting. He felt illiterate as his vocabulary became bound by nerves, yielding him the intelligence of a third grader. "He was an absolutely horrible man. Drunk off his ass half the time, and high in the sky the other half. He used to bring lady friends home, and I remember wondering what the hell that noise was. I mean, that sounded like a terrible game they were playing."
He was trying not to cry now, as the memories of those nights returned to him. He could almost smell the alcohol on the man's breath as he led his whore through the living room, his pants already unzipped, and her panties around her ankles. "I used to wonder why he played that game so often. It sounded so violent and all. And then, when I got older, I realized what was going on, and all I could do was cover my head with a pillow and hope he never came for me. I was lucky. He hit me often, and I still have a couple scars from where he broke bottles on me, but he never even thought to have sex with me. He wasn't a 'fucking cock sucker', as he so eloquently put it." Naruto shook his head, looking at the couch, and silently willing his eyes to stop stinging like that. "He made sure I wasn't one either. One time he tied me to a chair and forced me to watch him fuck three different whores in a row. That was the worst thing that I can remember happening to me."
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Sasuke frowned. (1) Naruto's shoulder's were shaking now and his voice had just cracked, as if he were crying. "I was fucking ten years old, and he made me watch for three and a half hours." Sasuke's heart shattered into a million pieces inside his chest as an anguished sob escaped Naruto. He could tell the blonde had been trying not to cry, but it was obviously to no avail.
He reached forward and grabbed Naruto's hand from his lap. "Hey, you don't have to tell me all of this. It's okay." Naruto looked up at him, blue eyes huge and watery, his cheeks streaked with tears, and his bottom lip trembling. Sasuke let go of his hand and took hold instead of the blonde's shoulders, pulling him to the center cushion of the couch and into a fierce hug. "It's okay," he said quietly, resting his cheek on Naruto's head.
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Naruto buried his face in Sasuke's shirt, his tears soaking it through within moments, and the other boy's arms tightened around him, enveloping him in a warm comfort that Naruto had never felt before. It made him cry harder. (2) He'd never told anyone these things before, and now that he had, he felt all of the pent up sorrow and rage coming back to him, and he didn't even hear what Sasuke was saying to him, only the sound of his voice, almost as comforting as the hand stroking his hair. He felt like he'd never stop crying.
It was warm there in Sasuke's lap, with Sasuke holding him, telling him it was okay, and Naruto realized that he'd never felt warm before. He realized that no one had ever really been this nice to him before, or cared enough to even consider it. His face was sticky with tears, and more were flooding from his eyes with every passing moment, and Sasuke just let it happen, didn't tell him to shut up or anything. He'd never cried so hard in his life.
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Sasuke could feel the wetness of Naruto's tears on his skin as they soaked through his shirt, and it was all he could do to keep from crying himself. It hurt like nothing he'd ever known to see Naruto so horribly sad. It made him seethe with anger towards the people who caused the blonde such anguish, and he felt his shattered heart melting away into nothingness as he held the blonde quietly. Who the hell would do something like that to a child? It was fucking wrong. Especially when that child was Naruto.
It was thirty minutes before Naruto's sobs ebbed, and his breathing returned to normal, but Sasuke didn't let go. Naruto still had silent tears running down his cheeks, and Sasuke was determined to make sure he was okay before releasing him.
The blonde looked up at him, his eyes soft, and brighter than they had been a few minutes ago. His voice was small when he spoke. "Thank you." He hiccupped and sat back. He slowly let go of Sasuke's shirt and made a vain attempt to smooth it out.
Sasuke smiled at him. "Any time, Naruto. Are you okay?"
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(3) The blonde thought for a moment before replying, "Yeah. I'm better than I have been in a long time." This said, he scooted away from Sasuke, giving the Uchiha his personal space once again. (Although, Sasuke was the one that hugged him first.) "But look what I've done to your shirt." He smiled brightly. The entire front of Sasuke's white wife beater was see through, as it was so wet with tears, and there were two spots where it puffed out in wrinkled balls. Naruto assumed this was where he had been gripping.
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"Whatever." Sasuke smiled at Naruto. "It'll be fine once I wash it." It was when he said this that the door bell rang, and for a moment, both of them were extremely confused. Then a light came over Naruto's face.
"The Pizza! Crap, will you answer the door, I so don't want to be seen right now."
"Sure. I'll be right back." Sasuke stood, walking into the kitchen and grabbing the pizza money off the counter before going to the front door. When he opened it, there was a boy that looked a couple years older than him standing there with a box of pizza and a smaller box that Sasuke assumed was the cinnamon sticks. The boy was giving him a strange look, and it wasn't until they'd exchanged food for money that Sasuke realized the look was directed at his shirt.
He smirked. "Is something wrong?"
The pizza boy jumped. "No! No! Enjoy you're pizza." With this, he turned on his heel and walked quickly back to his car. Sasuke was chuckling when he shut the door.
TBC...
A/N: Okay! I know I made you guys wait for forever (well, at least in comparison to my usual updates), but I had writer's block. I didn't write for a few days, and so I had to get back in my groove, hence the lack of smoothness in the flow of the writing. Sorry. I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless! I put some good SasuNaru huggage in there, even if it's still not romantic. –sweat drops- Can you see it developing, though? I can. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed. The chappie title is from "Still Waiting" by Sum 41. Awesome song.
Bye Bye
ISAN
1. Okay, little mood lightener. The first time I typed this, I wrote "froned" instead of "frowned". Say that out loud. "Froned". I cracked up.
2. Does this make sense to you? If it doesn't, let me explain. Naruto has been trying not to cry here, but he's been overcome by all these horrible memories, so he couldn't help but cry a little. Then Sasuke hugs him, and gives him a sort of permission to let it all out, and so now with every bit of comfort he receives, he cries harder than before. Get it?
3. Didn't really mean to do a POV switch here, but I accidentally wrote it this way, and thought it was a fun paragraph.