Title: Recruit Titus: Chapter Two

Author: Stormhawk

Rating: PG

Disclaimer:

Yadda, yadda, yadda.

Word Count: 803

Summary: Ty experiences more of the Agency and meets the RAs.

Notes: I know this took a long time and it's only short. I'm sorry. I'm putting another chapter of Hex up onto DA if that appeases you.

GOTO should fit you," Stef said as she handed Titus something off the rack.

Ty gave her a deadpan look. "That's a dress."

Stef looked at what she was holding. It was a bright red dress with a deep V-neck. "Oh…" she groaned, "the RAs have been here again. The last time they got in here they filled it with green bunnies that only ate chocolate."

"Who are these RAs? Are they the mental patients?"

Stef smiled, but shook her head. "No, they're agents. They're just…rather random. They look some mental patients seem sane. They're four teenage girls with licenses to kill."

Titus blinked, "ok…getting scared again."

"Nah, don't be scared, so long as you're immortal you're fine. I mean, they occasionally blow things up, but we all do, so…" she was struck silent by the look of horror on Ty's face.

He made a small-puppy like whimper, then grabbed a gun off the shelf behind him, "can I keep this?"

"Go ahead," she said with a smirk.

"What's wrong? Is this another possessed gun?"

"Not exactly, but it is a water gun."

"I am in a nuthouse aren't I?"

"No, things seriously aren't usually this…well, random."

"Well, that's good to know."

Stef looked at him and required him into a suit, "that was easy. Now do you want to take the lecture so you actually know what's going on around here?"

"Um…ok."

"Follow me," she said as she dragged him to the gym. She put him in a corner and required a TV and an uncomfortable plastic chair. "Watch this, she said, it should explain everything."

"Is that Mr. DNA?" he asked as the video started.

"I'm not sure…"

"Those are hand puppets!" Ty yelled as he watched a hand-puppet-agent kill a hand-puppet-rebel.

"RAs!" Stef yelled as she shifted them there.

The four random agents appeared, T'Lorie looked guilty, Angel was attempting to look innocent, Star was drooling over a Neo poster and Alo was feeding a koala.

"The cookies I can forgive. The wall was funny. Sheerluck is dealing with my gun. Who messed with the training film?"

T'L raised a hand, "I was bored. Brown is getting hard to freak out."

"Oooh…" Angel said as she poked Ty in the arm. "Is this a rebel, can I interrogate him?"

Ty jumped up and hid behind Stef.

"Why are people always using me as a human shield?" she muttered. "And no, he's my new recruit. Leave him alone!"

"Can I have him, please, please, please?" Angel said as she pulled on Stef's suit.

"Not after all the begging I had to do to get him. You're out of luck Angel."

"Pleeeeeeeasssse?" Angel begged.

Stef required a cookie and shoved it in her mouth. "My recruit. Not yours. Mine."

"Oh fine then," she said with a pout.

Boris looked at Ty and started to walk toward him, his blood-soaked claws tapping on the gym floor.

"Why is that koala looking at me like I'm a meal?" Ty wondered, looking for something to defend himself with.

"Bad Boris," Alo said, pulling a baggie from her pocket. "I got rebel bits for you."

Ty swore the koala grinned as he leapt back toward its owner, looking up expectantly as she dropped some rather suss items from the baggie down to him.

"Now," Ty said quietly to Stef, "when she says…rebel bits…does she mean…?"

"It's best if you don't think about it," she muttered. "Could give you nightmares."

"Do I really have to un-tweak the training film?" T'L asked, "there's nothing wrong with handpuppets."

"Ok, I'll make deal with you," Stef said, using her dealing-with-random-agents logic. "If you make it better so I get my newbie up to speed, I will tell you a way to freak Brown out."

T'Lorie grinned like the time she'd made Bob bitch-slap his owner.

Bob, Bob, where for art thou Bob?

Bob is currently living a life of luxury after a short but lucrative career as a model for Punching Bags Monthly.

"Ok," the blonde RA said. "Deal."

"Film?"

T'Lorie whipped out her laptop and typed in something and nodded. "K, it's boring again. Now how do we freak out Brown?"

"It's stupidly simple really, I don't know why you haven't figured it out yet. All you have to do is stalk him instead of Jonesy. He has this, ok well not natural, but total fear of blondes. Your mere presence around him for more than a few minutes shifts him into 'can't sleep, blondes will kill me' mood. You should see the wear and tear of his gym floor."

The RAs grinned at each other and shifted off to do 'evil'.

Titus required a cookie and a gun before sitting back down. "You know," he said as he munched his cookie. "I think I'm gonna like it here."