A/N: Yes. Dane Cook. If you don't know him, look him up on and listen to his wonderful voice and see his wonderful face. By the way, the guy's funny as all hell. My favorite comedian, now.

Warnings: None.

Disclaimer: I don't own anyone, even Dane Cook (but oh, how I want to).

Summary: hp100 challenge: send in the clowns. Hogwarts needed a new comedian.


One night, Dumbledore decided he needed the Hogwarts version of a court jester. With the war against Voldemort again in progress, he knew that his children needed a bit of humor in their lives.

The ad went out immediately.

Many wizards responded. But most of the people did not amuse Albus very much. The Headmaster nearly gave up—and then the last candidate entered: a wizard who had become a Muggle comedian. His act was perfect, and he was hired.

The man grinned at the response of the female population of the school. Dane Cook had found where he belonged.