Ch. 6: Useful Homework

The next day went by rather uneventfully. The most exciting thing to happen was when Sirius forgot to add beetle wings to his potion and the contents bubbled over. Lily quickly did a counter spell and fixed his mistake before the professor could notice.

Yet again, Lily and James were in an empty classroom. James' arms were around Lily's waist, hers about his neck. They were too involved in their positioning to notice the quick footsteps coming down the hall towards their room. The door flew open and Snape walked in.

He stood and stared at the two of them, and they did nothing but stare back. Alexia Miller appeared behind Severus. "Oh, Evans you two are so cute! I would have thought you could do better, though, Potter."

Lily and James quickly separated. "You know we're just rehearsing for the play," Lily replied.

"Right… Potter, do you really find Lily attractive? Frizzy hair, buck teeth, pond scum eyes," Alexia said.

"You need to get control of your girlfriend, Snivellus," James said angrily.

"You need to address me, Potter. If your mudblood sweetheart here would leave me alone, maybe I would be a little nicer," Alexia spat.

"Me! I never did anything to you!" Lily exclaimed, her fiery temper beginning to show.

Alexia took a step forward. "You were born."

Lily's hands rolled into fists and her face became even redder. James held her shoulder.

"Hate to say this darling but I do believe you being born was the bigger burden on us all. Now, if you will excuse us, we really must be going," James said to Alexia with a jovial smile. He guided Lily out the door and into the hallway.

Once they were clear of the classroom Lily wrenched out of his grip and stormed down the hall. James caught her arm. "You need to cool down a little, Lily."

"I can cool down just fine in the sanctuary of my room, thank you," Lily snapped. "And anyways, I didn't need you're help back there. I could have handled the situation just fine on my own."

"Look, I was just telling you yesterday how uptight you were." James could see Lily's anger rising. "I'm a great listener. Come down to the kitchens. They have the best carrot cake right now. It'll do you good. And if you don't like it, I will personally escort you to Alexia Miller's headquarters and help you kick her ass. Then you can kick mine if you'd like."

A small grin played on Lily's lips. "Alright."

"Great. Right this way," James led her down the hall. They were just beginning to descend a staircase when they cam across Peter Pettigrew.

"Hello, Peter," James said. "What are you doing out so late?"

Worry was written across Peter's face, but James was oblivious to it. "Just, um, left a book in McGonagall's room. Going to see if I can get it."

"Just don't run into McGonagall, she'll eat you alive," James said.

Peter laughed nervously and walked away.

"Peter?" James called.

"Yes?"

"That's the wrong way," James said.

"How right you are!" Peter said, and walked the other direction, towards McGonagall's room.

"He seemed uptight," Lily commented.

"That's just how Peter is," James replied.

Lily still doubted he was always that nervous, but she did not voice her opinion. James led her to a portrait and tickled the fruit. The painting swung open and revealed the magnificent kitchen.

James pulled Lily into the kitchen. He sat her down at a small wooden table and went to fetch a particular house elf. While she waited, she was brought a strong cup of tea.

Soon James returned. With him came a small house elf dressed in what appeared to be a very well-disguised wizard's hat. The elf had very cleverly arranged flowers around the brim of the hat so that it was barely visible.

"What can I get you, dear?" the elf squeaked.

"Just bring her all the good stuff, Timby; she needs it." James said with a wink.

Timby hurried off deeper into the kitchen.

"Feeling better yet?" James asked.

"Actually, I am," Lily said, sipping on her tea.

"I thought this would help," James said.

Timby brought out two heaping dishes of pastries, cookies, and cakes. A different house elf brought two large bowls of ice cream.

"My favorite," Lily said, taking the huge bowl of chocolate ice cream.

After a few minutes of silence, Lily spoke up. "I just don't get it."

"What?"

"What does Alexia have against me? I never did anything to her."

"She's jealous."

Lily was just about to reply, but she closed her mouth. "Why would she be jealous of me?" she asked after a moment.

"You're prettier than she is, for one thing," James answered.

Lily scoffed at this, and James continued. "Plus you're smarter, a lot more people actually like you, and to top it all off, you get to be Juliet."

Lily said nothing.

"And it doesn't really help that her boyfriend is in love with you," James added.

Lily nearly choked on her cake. "Severus is not in love with me!"

"Whatever you say," James said.

"You don't really think he is, do you?" Lily asked. Getting curious, she leaned forward. Her red hair dipped into her chocolate ice cream, but it went unnoticed.

James looked up. "For being the smartest girl in the school, you sure can be slow. You must be the only person in the world that doesn't know Snivellus has a thing for you. Oh, and you're hairs in your ice cream."

Lily wiped off her hair. Seeing that the conversation was going no further, she switched to a different subject. "I'm not a damsel in distress, I didn't need a knight in shining armor back there. I could have taken care of myself."

"I was just as worried about myself as I was about you." James said. Lily looked at him strangely. "Obviously you didn't see the heard of Slytherins heading towards us."

"Oh. No I didn't." Lily said. Her cheeks turned red. 'I made such a fool of myself, getting mad at him. Here I was, thinking that he was just trying to show off, but really he was saving his ass, and mine.'

James, seeing her embarrassment, decided to tell a joke. "Ok, I have a great joke."

Lily looked up and pushed her plate away. "Let's hear it then."

"Well, Sven really liked Olga," James began in a funny accent. "One day Sven took Olga to the movies, and the next night he took her to dinner. Pretty soon they were steady. Well, one day Sven decides it's time for him to make his move on Olga. So he takes her to a nice dinner, to the movies, and then down to lovers lane. They're sitting in the car, you know, kissing, and Sven sticks his hand up Olga's shirt. Olga starts freaking out, 'Oh my goodness, Sven, don't do that,' she says. 'It's ok, I love you, Olga,' he says. So they start kissing again, and pretty soon Sven takes Olga's hand and sticks it down his pants. Olga starts freaking out again. She jumps out of the car and runs around it once… runs around it twice… runs around it three times. Finally she stops. Sven says, 'I have only one thing to say,'" James paused. "'Let Go.'"

They both erupted into laughter. Once they had both stopped laughing, Lily said "Ok, I've got one. Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree?"

"Why?"

"Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree?"

"Why?"

"Because he was attached to the first monkey."

James stared at Lily and blinked. He then went into hysterics, closely followed by Lily. Neither had any idea why it was so funny, but it certainly was hilarious.

After a half hour of good and lame jokes, Lily glanced at her watch. It read 12:19. "Oh my, we need to go, it's getting late," she said.

"Yeah," James agreed. They thanked Timby for the treats and walked silently back to the Common Room. They reached the stairs and looked at each other.

"That wasn't so bad, was it?" asked James.

Lily shook her head and smiled. She felt like she was unable to say anything. Butterflies flew through her stomach and into her throat. Uncertainly, she took a small step forward, towards James. He put his arms about her waist and pulled her close. Their lips met, and Lily nearly swooned. The feeling she was experiencing was unlike any she had ever felt before.

"Looks like you're practicing real hard, alright," Remus had appeared at the end of the boy's staircase. A sly grin was perched on his lips.

Lily and James tried to explain themselves, but all that came out was nonsense. "Mmm hmm," Remus said with a knowing nod. He walked back up the stairs to his dorm without looking back.

"Well, umm…" James said, scratching his head awkwardly.

Lily grabbed James' face and pulled him into a deep kiss. "Goodnight," she said as she pulled away.

James blinked lazily and said "Goodnight."

They each went to their separate dorms and explained to their friends the most interesting thing that had ever happened to them.

I seriously like that chappie! In case you didn't catch it, Peter was going to a meeting with Slytherins for Voldemort supporters. If you also loved this chapter, or if you hated it, please let me now. Reviews are always much appreciated!