[ Sha Gojyo, P. I. ]
disclaimer: Gensomaden Saiyuki belongs to Kazuya Minekura and some other people
a/n: those "film noir" fics are a lot of fun to read so I decided to try my hand at it. Gojyo in a fedora anyone? *leer* hehehe. So anyway, I'm an amateur at this. the closest to a noir film i've ever watched was probably that one Roswell episode.
So anyway, this isn't a serious project. It might be, if the creative juices decide to flow, but for now is a little ficlet... this is as close to a humor fic as i'll ever get, so tell me what you think..
[Secretary]
I was leaning in my chair, feet propped up on my desk. The summer was hot and sultry; it was an unpleasant, stifling invasion.
First day on the job. I'd put out an ad for a secretary, but so far none had popped in for an interview. Sanzo said something about my wording of the ad, but what the hell does he know?
-Sexy secretary needed. Reasonable pay. Fringe benefits offered.-
What was wrong with that? Nothing, unless you're a monk or a saru. "Fringe benefits? Huh?" Jeez. You would think a teenage boy, of all people would get my meaning.
So anyway, I'm sitting here in a dark and dingy office like some kind of hermit when I could be out banging some chick. I scowled. Damn Sanzo, going on about needing to get a job now that the whole "holy quest" thing was over. He actually had the gall to make a crack about me just sitting around smoking and drinking all day. And what does /he/ do all day?
Fucking monk.
I put my feet back on the ground and dug around the desk drawer for my cigarettes. The clock on the wall read 5:42. A few more hours, then secretary or no secretary, I was hitting the bars.
I was trying to decide what kind of girl to bring home that night when the door flew open in a flurry of red. I gave a silent little cheer as the answer to my prayers stood in front of me. She wore 3-inch high fuck-me boots that ended at mid-calf. Damn nice legs that went on forever, until my eyes hit the sinfully short red leather dress. It clung at all the right places and left nothing to the imagination. I slowly made my way to her face, smirking around my cigarette. "You're hi-"
I choked and coughed like I had a dust storm brewing in my throat. There had been a split second where I saw the similarity, and another before I recognized... her.
"Hakkai?!" I spluttered, cigarette dropping from my lips.
He- /she/ grinned through her pageboy haircut. "Well, you said you would only hire a female secretary... and I really need a job. You know how Sanzo can get..." He, no, dammit, /she/ said in a calm, reasonable voice.
"Well, fuck, Hakkai," I said, glaring at him, "I didn't have /this/ in mind."
"Fine," Hakkai said, pouting those cherry red lips... oh, NO, stop thinking. He continued, "All those spells, those rare, and might I say, expensive potions... All for nothing."
I didn't say anything. I glared. I glowered. I glared some more.
"Fine. I'll just be on my way now." He/she turned to leave.
I growled in frustration, and shoved the desk over onto the ground. A satisfactory cloud of dust flew into the air. "Fine... since you went through so much trouble and all..." I sighed dejectedly. "The job's yours."
Hakkai smiled, and swished out the door.
"Just don't expect any of the fringe benefits," I yelled out behind him.
I got up and went straight out the door. I got my secretary didn't I? Locking it behind me, I read, 'Sha Gojyo, Private Investigator' on the glass. What was I getting myself into?
I needed a drink.
- e n d - (for now)
don't forget to review! thanks =)
disclaimer: Gensomaden Saiyuki belongs to Kazuya Minekura and some other people
a/n: those "film noir" fics are a lot of fun to read so I decided to try my hand at it. Gojyo in a fedora anyone? *leer* hehehe. So anyway, I'm an amateur at this. the closest to a noir film i've ever watched was probably that one Roswell episode.
So anyway, this isn't a serious project. It might be, if the creative juices decide to flow, but for now is a little ficlet... this is as close to a humor fic as i'll ever get, so tell me what you think..
[Secretary]
I was leaning in my chair, feet propped up on my desk. The summer was hot and sultry; it was an unpleasant, stifling invasion.
First day on the job. I'd put out an ad for a secretary, but so far none had popped in for an interview. Sanzo said something about my wording of the ad, but what the hell does he know?
-Sexy secretary needed. Reasonable pay. Fringe benefits offered.-
What was wrong with that? Nothing, unless you're a monk or a saru. "Fringe benefits? Huh?" Jeez. You would think a teenage boy, of all people would get my meaning.
So anyway, I'm sitting here in a dark and dingy office like some kind of hermit when I could be out banging some chick. I scowled. Damn Sanzo, going on about needing to get a job now that the whole "holy quest" thing was over. He actually had the gall to make a crack about me just sitting around smoking and drinking all day. And what does /he/ do all day?
Fucking monk.
I put my feet back on the ground and dug around the desk drawer for my cigarettes. The clock on the wall read 5:42. A few more hours, then secretary or no secretary, I was hitting the bars.
I was trying to decide what kind of girl to bring home that night when the door flew open in a flurry of red. I gave a silent little cheer as the answer to my prayers stood in front of me. She wore 3-inch high fuck-me boots that ended at mid-calf. Damn nice legs that went on forever, until my eyes hit the sinfully short red leather dress. It clung at all the right places and left nothing to the imagination. I slowly made my way to her face, smirking around my cigarette. "You're hi-"
I choked and coughed like I had a dust storm brewing in my throat. There had been a split second where I saw the similarity, and another before I recognized... her.
"Hakkai?!" I spluttered, cigarette dropping from my lips.
He- /she/ grinned through her pageboy haircut. "Well, you said you would only hire a female secretary... and I really need a job. You know how Sanzo can get..." He, no, dammit, /she/ said in a calm, reasonable voice.
"Well, fuck, Hakkai," I said, glaring at him, "I didn't have /this/ in mind."
"Fine," Hakkai said, pouting those cherry red lips... oh, NO, stop thinking. He continued, "All those spells, those rare, and might I say, expensive potions... All for nothing."
I didn't say anything. I glared. I glowered. I glared some more.
"Fine. I'll just be on my way now." He/she turned to leave.
I growled in frustration, and shoved the desk over onto the ground. A satisfactory cloud of dust flew into the air. "Fine... since you went through so much trouble and all..." I sighed dejectedly. "The job's yours."
Hakkai smiled, and swished out the door.
"Just don't expect any of the fringe benefits," I yelled out behind him.
I got up and went straight out the door. I got my secretary didn't I? Locking it behind me, I read, 'Sha Gojyo, Private Investigator' on the glass. What was I getting myself into?
I needed a drink.
- e n d - (for now)
don't forget to review! thanks =)