Title: Erase/Rewind
Author: Jen Kollic

Disclaimers: All characters are trademarks of DC Comics. I make no money from this. Wah.
Feedback: Absolutely, but if you're just going to go "OMFG! HARLEY/JOKER OTP!11one1" then don't bother. I'll just make fun of you.
Notes: Harley is on a bus.

Spoilers: Vague references to events in the animated series, Gotham Adventures, Batman Adventures and Harley and Ivy. Will most likely not make sense if you've not read Batman Adventures #16.

Chapter 3

It would have been much easier if she could just have stolen a damn car. Harley hated buses. If she was in a car she could have driven to Louisiana without stopping, but here she was stuck on a stupid bus that stayed on the stupid Interstate full of stupid people. At least she had a window seat. (and, well, if she'd been driving she would have had to sleep at SOME point because no matter how fast the car was it would still have had to go through five states) Maybe she should have gotten a flight, but that would have needed fake ID and she didn't want to risk being caught since this was important.

Because it was obvious that Ivy had tricked the B-Man somehow. She couldn't really be a plant now, she was smart, she must have rigged up something so convincing (and those clones she made had fooled Batman before, hadn't they?) that he'd fallen for it. The whole thing was a fake, it had to be. Harley was sure it was. Really, she didn't have to be on this bus right now, she could just have stayed in Gotham and waited for Ivy to come back, because she would be back, because it wasn't true, because (she'd never said goodbye) Ivy had fooled Batman before.

And if it was true (it wasn't of course) then Harley had to see it with her own eyes (she didn't WANT to see it, but since it wasn't true then she didn't have to worry about that, did she?) before she would believe it.

So here she was on the damn bus, currently just about to cross the state line into Mississippi, which meant she was almost there. Of course, she didn't know whereabouts in Louisiana Ivy was, but Batman had mentioned a swamp, hadn't he? (she hoped the swamp didn't have as many gross bugs as the Amazon had) And hey, finding Ivy would be a cakewalk next to breaking out of Arkham.

That was another reason to find Ivy, to tell her how she broke out, since (it had been partly thanks to her that Harley had gotten out) it had been so clever she just had to tell someone. She'd gotten the idea when they went to clear out Ivy's cell since the stupids believed Batman and thought Ivy was gone. (she didn't know what had bothered her more, the thought of it empty, or the thought of it filled with Ivy's stuff but no Ivy, she'd been sleeping with her back to it at night since they got moved back to Arkham from Blackgate a week ago) And Harley had begged and pleaded and cried until they'd agreed to let her keep one of Ivy's plants, because they thought they were just NORMAL plants like the gullible stupids they were for believing Batman.

Harley knew better of course. The only reason the staff at Arkham thought they were normal was because Ivy had let them think that so they wouldn't take them off her, though to be fair they had been normal when she'd gotten them, she'd just worked on them at night, and Harley was the only one who knew and there's no way she'd have told anyone.

So she'd taken the harmless little aloe. What possible harm could she do with that they'd thought, since it wasn't even toxic and they used it in hand lotion these days. But Harley remembered Ivy telling her about it, and how it was really a cactus or something, (it was a funny-looking sort of cactus, that was for sure) and how it just needed a few tweaks in the right place. Harley wasn't exactly sure what the right place was, so she just settled on annoying it. (heh, 'annoying it', that sounded like something Ivy would have come out with) So she'd poked at it, shook it, yelled at it then started breaking leaves off it until she (finally) set off the defence mechanism Ivy had somehow programmed into it. She'd said it was really a cactus after all, and it had proceeded to fire spines at her.

Then it had just been a case of acting like it had poisoned her. Harley had kicked, screamed and convulsed until the orderlies came running. They'd called an ambulance right away of course, even though it was common knowledge that Harley had been immunised against Ivy's poisons (that was the last time she'd tell Bratgirl anything…) they couldn't be sure. Especially since Ivy had poisoned Harley when she'd ripped up her stomach in Blackgate. (hmm, she'd need to remember that Ivy could poison her if she really wanted to…)

And once they'd got her in the ambulance (while she'd made as big a scene as possible and 'accidentally' kicked two of the orderlies in the face) she'd just waited until they were clear of Arkham, and jumped out the back, which had been kinda scary but not really as bad as being chased by some crazy guy in a tank, and she'd gotten away with just a few cuts and bruises, she'd had worse from Mistah J. She'd made a quick stop at one of her and Ivy's hideouts to pick up a change of clothes and some cash (see, if Batman wasn't smart enough to find that then of course Ivy had tricked him!) then headed for the bus depot. They'd never think of looking for her on a bus, since it was such a dorky way to travel. (she'd just have to hope no-one found out, or she'd never live it down)

She missed her babies, but there was no way she could have brought them with her, though they'd certainly have helped her find Ivy in the swamp. Ivy had better appreciate all this trouble she was going to in finding her. (she hoped Ivy wanted her to find her, but why on earth wouldn't she? That was just silly) Unless of course she really was a plant now, but Harley had been through this already and Ivy wasn't. It wouldn't be long now, (until she knew for sure) she'd be in Louisiana soon and then it was just a case of tracking her down.

Maybe there was some kind of research lab in the swamp or something, since Batman had said Ivy had gone there looking for a cure for her powers. That should have been his first clue, Ivy would never want rid of her powers! (though she had tried a normal life that one time… but that was different. Really.) And to think he was meant to be the world's greatest detective! No, wait one damn moment, how the hell had he known that Ivy had gone there to get rid of her powers? Someone must have told him that, and that someone must have seen Ivy, so it was just a case of finding that someone then they'd lead her straight to Ivy!

Then again, 'someone' would be even harder to find, since she didn't even have a name to work with. (stupid Batman, he could at least have told her! Well, maybe she should have asked… too late now) Ah well, she'd just have to sleep on it. (what ELSE could you do on a bus that didn't even have a TV?) She'd be there soon, and from there she could wing it. How hard could it be? Harley would get there, find Ivy, who'd be a person not a plant, yell at her for scaring her, and everything would be fine. Yeah.