Beyond Recollection ~ A Sonny & Skye FanFiction
Chapter Twelve ~ And all of the kings men
The sound of the heavy elevator doors clanging shut woke her. Slowly she raised her stiffened neck away from the leather couch and looked to the door of the pent house, waiting for it to open. His muffled voice speaking to the bodyguard outside reached her pounding ears and she stood in response.
Turning her back from the now opening door, her eyes stayed fixated to the ticking clock above the mantle. The hour was early, nearly six in the morning.
'He must have spent the night at Carly's,' she thought bitterly, listening to the front door swing shut.
"Max said no one was home," Sonny spoke simply, throwing his coat over the desk chair.
"He was mistaken," she stated simply in a harsh tone. "Where have you been Sonny?"
"I don't think that's really any of your business," he spoke as he moved to the bar beside her, pouring himself a glass. "But I'm guessing from your attitude that you already know where I was or at least 'who' I was with."
"Well, when you decided that the dock was a suitable mating ground, you should have guessed that someone could have been watching."
He poured the contents of his drink into his mouth before he slammed the glass down. "It does not concern you, Courtney."
"Yes it does, Sonny!" she yelled back raising her voice, anger flashing in her eyes.
"No, it doesn't!" he bellowed throwing his glass towards the mantle. It crashed against the clock her eyes had focussed on just moments before, broken glass falling to their feet. "I don't care if you saw us but you-- ,"
"I didn't see you," Courtney interrupted and watched confusion pass over her brother's features before she went on. "But someone else did."
"Who?" Sonny asked turning away from her to stare at mantle as a few drops of his drink dripped to the ground of broken glass.
"Skye," she bit out sharply and simply. He hung his head low the moment her name passed Courtney's lips, wishing it could had been anyone else.
"I didn't want her to find out like that," he spoke softly as he stared down to the broken pieces of his life, waiting to be put back together.
"She shouldn't have had to find out, Sonny! Because you should have never betrayed her like that!"
"You don't understand," he whispered, griping the cold marble of the mantle.
"I understand plenty," she fought back.
"You know nothing about what goes on in here!" he shouted, violently pointing to his head. "You don't know what I feel!"
"I get that I could never understand what is going on inside of your head Sonny, but that's the way it has always been. You have always been so unpredictable. I could never guess what you were thinking or feeling," she spoke with a hint of animosity before continuing softly. "Until I saw you with her."
He looked at her through the corners of his eyes before returning his gaze back to the shards of glass.
"When you looked at her, everyone knew what you were feeling. I've never seen your eyes light up brighter or become softer and warmer then the way they did when you were near her. It was love that did that, Sonny."
"Its not my fault I can't feel that love!"
"You're right. The accident could never be your fault but what you did to her has to be but on your shoulders. On your conscience!"
"I can't love a woman I can only remember hating!"
"But you can give her false hopes by pretending you did, by taking her into your arms and bed. All to just turn away from her and run back to the person that broke your heart!"
"My love for Carly is all I have left! It's all I know and it's the only thing that hasn't changed in my life!"
"But it did change Sonny! Whether you can remember or not, Carly was cruel and heartless to you. She had an affair and led you to believe that Ric's child was your own!"
"I have to give her another chance. I can't do this anymore," he motioned around them.
"Can't do what? Live in the life you wished for, with the woman you loved!"
"I love Carly!" he snapped brutally. "You can't change that!"
"She's using you Sonny!"
"How?"
"You were the one who helped Bobbie get custody of Michael. She needs you to undo what you did and without your memory you are simply prey to her."
"She wouldn't do that!"
"Just like she didn't betray you with Ric!"
"I love her."
"Sonny--,"
"I just can't be with Skye, not when I love another."
"But you where going to live your life with Skye." Hesitating for a moment, Courtney continued with caution, "You were going to start a family together."
"You don't know that, Courtney. Whose to say that we would have even lasted?"
"You did," she stated firmly pulling a folded envelope from the back pocket of her jeans.
"What is that?" Sonny asked, eyeing it with worry.
"You should know she's gone," she spoke ignoring his question, watching as an unreadable emotion flashed across his features. "She left this letter for you before leaving. I don't know what it says but I can only imagine that her words are only what you want to hear. She didn't want you to know the pain and anger she felt when Jason and I found her. She's too good of a person to try and ruin you with guilt, but the same can't be said for myself. I want you to know what you have done to her.
"You broke her heart Sonny. You've become another mark in the tally of people she has given her all to, only to be broken and left with nothing. You are no better than Jax and AJ now, what does that tell you?"
"It tells me that she did the right thing by leaving."
"Then I want you to have this as well," she spoke reaching into her front pocket and pulling out a gold chain. She placed it and the letter on the bar beside them before turning to leave.
"What is that?" Sonny's voice cracked as he stared down at the glittering chain and the diamond ring attached to it.
Courtney turned and stared at her brother for a long moment. He looked almost defeated as she spoke her last words. "That's her engagement ring. She found it in your belongings from the hospital and has been wearing is ever since. The chain is broken, though. She must have broken it when she tore it from her neck."
'No. No. No. No. No.'
"It can't be," Sonny desperately shook his head, looking away.
"It is and its not going to go away just because 'you' can't remember it. Well remember this, I have no doubt in my mind that you will get your memory back. You are too strong to let such a thing beat you, but your actions yesterday cost you the only woman who loved you for who you where and never asked you to change. I can't even say that she has stopped loving you, G-d is too cruel in her case. No, she'll love you for the rest of her life. Broken heart and all!"
TBC
Chapter Twelve ~ And all of the kings men
The sound of the heavy elevator doors clanging shut woke her. Slowly she raised her stiffened neck away from the leather couch and looked to the door of the pent house, waiting for it to open. His muffled voice speaking to the bodyguard outside reached her pounding ears and she stood in response.
Turning her back from the now opening door, her eyes stayed fixated to the ticking clock above the mantle. The hour was early, nearly six in the morning.
'He must have spent the night at Carly's,' she thought bitterly, listening to the front door swing shut.
"Max said no one was home," Sonny spoke simply, throwing his coat over the desk chair.
"He was mistaken," she stated simply in a harsh tone. "Where have you been Sonny?"
"I don't think that's really any of your business," he spoke as he moved to the bar beside her, pouring himself a glass. "But I'm guessing from your attitude that you already know where I was or at least 'who' I was with."
"Well, when you decided that the dock was a suitable mating ground, you should have guessed that someone could have been watching."
He poured the contents of his drink into his mouth before he slammed the glass down. "It does not concern you, Courtney."
"Yes it does, Sonny!" she yelled back raising her voice, anger flashing in her eyes.
"No, it doesn't!" he bellowed throwing his glass towards the mantle. It crashed against the clock her eyes had focussed on just moments before, broken glass falling to their feet. "I don't care if you saw us but you-- ,"
"I didn't see you," Courtney interrupted and watched confusion pass over her brother's features before she went on. "But someone else did."
"Who?" Sonny asked turning away from her to stare at mantle as a few drops of his drink dripped to the ground of broken glass.
"Skye," she bit out sharply and simply. He hung his head low the moment her name passed Courtney's lips, wishing it could had been anyone else.
"I didn't want her to find out like that," he spoke softly as he stared down to the broken pieces of his life, waiting to be put back together.
"She shouldn't have had to find out, Sonny! Because you should have never betrayed her like that!"
"You don't understand," he whispered, griping the cold marble of the mantle.
"I understand plenty," she fought back.
"You know nothing about what goes on in here!" he shouted, violently pointing to his head. "You don't know what I feel!"
"I get that I could never understand what is going on inside of your head Sonny, but that's the way it has always been. You have always been so unpredictable. I could never guess what you were thinking or feeling," she spoke with a hint of animosity before continuing softly. "Until I saw you with her."
He looked at her through the corners of his eyes before returning his gaze back to the shards of glass.
"When you looked at her, everyone knew what you were feeling. I've never seen your eyes light up brighter or become softer and warmer then the way they did when you were near her. It was love that did that, Sonny."
"Its not my fault I can't feel that love!"
"You're right. The accident could never be your fault but what you did to her has to be but on your shoulders. On your conscience!"
"I can't love a woman I can only remember hating!"
"But you can give her false hopes by pretending you did, by taking her into your arms and bed. All to just turn away from her and run back to the person that broke your heart!"
"My love for Carly is all I have left! It's all I know and it's the only thing that hasn't changed in my life!"
"But it did change Sonny! Whether you can remember or not, Carly was cruel and heartless to you. She had an affair and led you to believe that Ric's child was your own!"
"I have to give her another chance. I can't do this anymore," he motioned around them.
"Can't do what? Live in the life you wished for, with the woman you loved!"
"I love Carly!" he snapped brutally. "You can't change that!"
"She's using you Sonny!"
"How?"
"You were the one who helped Bobbie get custody of Michael. She needs you to undo what you did and without your memory you are simply prey to her."
"She wouldn't do that!"
"Just like she didn't betray you with Ric!"
"I love her."
"Sonny--,"
"I just can't be with Skye, not when I love another."
"But you where going to live your life with Skye." Hesitating for a moment, Courtney continued with caution, "You were going to start a family together."
"You don't know that, Courtney. Whose to say that we would have even lasted?"
"You did," she stated firmly pulling a folded envelope from the back pocket of her jeans.
"What is that?" Sonny asked, eyeing it with worry.
"You should know she's gone," she spoke ignoring his question, watching as an unreadable emotion flashed across his features. "She left this letter for you before leaving. I don't know what it says but I can only imagine that her words are only what you want to hear. She didn't want you to know the pain and anger she felt when Jason and I found her. She's too good of a person to try and ruin you with guilt, but the same can't be said for myself. I want you to know what you have done to her.
"You broke her heart Sonny. You've become another mark in the tally of people she has given her all to, only to be broken and left with nothing. You are no better than Jax and AJ now, what does that tell you?"
"It tells me that she did the right thing by leaving."
"Then I want you to have this as well," she spoke reaching into her front pocket and pulling out a gold chain. She placed it and the letter on the bar beside them before turning to leave.
"What is that?" Sonny's voice cracked as he stared down at the glittering chain and the diamond ring attached to it.
Courtney turned and stared at her brother for a long moment. He looked almost defeated as she spoke her last words. "That's her engagement ring. She found it in your belongings from the hospital and has been wearing is ever since. The chain is broken, though. She must have broken it when she tore it from her neck."
'No. No. No. No. No.'
"It can't be," Sonny desperately shook his head, looking away.
"It is and its not going to go away just because 'you' can't remember it. Well remember this, I have no doubt in my mind that you will get your memory back. You are too strong to let such a thing beat you, but your actions yesterday cost you the only woman who loved you for who you where and never asked you to change. I can't even say that she has stopped loving you, G-d is too cruel in her case. No, she'll love you for the rest of her life. Broken heart and all!"
TBC