Disclaimer: This is an original story based upon the characters of Gilmore Girls. No profit will be made from this story, and no copyright infringement is intended.

Author's Note: Thank you to all who have left their reviews. As this story comes to an end (there is this chapter left and an epilogue) I just want to thank all of you for making me feel so welcome as I made my first venture into the world of Gilmore Girls fan fiction. There will be more to come!

We sit in silence–her on a barrel of flour and me on a barrel of sugar. The words were there, "on the tip of my tongue," as the saying goes, but I couldn't bring myself to say them. Silence had become part of the language of our relationship–if we weren't silent to each other, we were fighting with each other. It had been that way for what seemed like forever.

"So...how did they get you here anyway?" Lorelai asked suddenly breaking the silence. "It's Friday, you don't even have DAR functions on Friday."

I gave a sarcastic little laugh, "They cancelled it on Wednesday. They told me they had something special planned for Friday, and then Sandra called me up this morning and told me I had been chosen for the DAR woman of the month. They said they were going to take me out somewhere fancy for lunch, they blindfolded me, and then the next thing I know I'm being shoved in your pantry."

"This is absolutely crazy," Lorelai said shaking her head. "I mean, locking us up in a pantry and forcing us to talk like we are two year olds. This is crazy."

"I agree," I replied

"Completely crazy"

"Yes it is,"

"I mean, telling us that we can't come out until we talk,"

"Ludicrous"

The silence returns and we both turn away from each other–as if we are just biding our time until they realize that it is hopeless–until they realize that this is what we do, Lorelai and I–until they realize that things are never going to change.

"But I want things to change!" I suddenly yell, standing up and the suprised look on Lorelai's face can't hold a candle to my own surprise at my outburst. "I don't want to be like this anymore! I'm sorry alright! I'm sorry! I'm sorry I invited Christopher to the wedding, I'm sorry I tried to break up you and Luke, I'm sorry that I didn't say I'm sorry before! I messed up! I made a mistake! I'm sorry! I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" I cried out louder and then as quickly as the outburst started, it ended and I sat back down, amazed at what had just happened.

"Mom..."she said after a few minutes. "You didn't break us up."

I looked over at her in confusion.

"We did that. You may have been a contributing factor, but we broke ourselves up." She snickered, "It seems like since I was a little girl I've been trying to prove my independence, prove I was an adult. Well, I am an adult, and adults don't blame their meddling mommies for the consequences of their actions. That's what I was doing–that's what I've always done–blamed you. If I couldn't trace something I did back to you to blame you somehow, then I blamed you for raising me, justified myself in thinking that I had the most controlling mother in the world and that's the reason I act the way I do. I shouldn't have kept it from him that I went over to Christopher's house that night. I probably gave Chris the wrong idea too–thinking there was a chance after that night. He probably believed you when you told him he had a chance because of that night," she paused for a minute, and she started wiping away a few tears.

"It just hurt Mom. It hurt that you would go behind my back like that. It hurt that you wouldn't see Luke for the wonderful man that he is. It just hurt that you couldn't be happy for me."

Again another pause, "Anyway, I'm sorry too."

I look up at her and smile. She smiles back and another moment of silence passes.

"Lorelai..." I say, "I did misjudge the man, I thought because of his social status he wasn't good for you. I was wrong."

She nods, "So...I guess we've said what we needed to say," she says and stands up to knock on the door to tell them to let us out.

I reach up and catch her hand, "Lorelai wait," I say and pull her back to sit her down. She looks at me in confusion. I take a deep breath and begin,

"I know you wish your childhood was different. I know you never wanted the life that your father and I wanted for you. I know you think we were absent parents and that we never cared about you. You think that I have never been happier for you and never cared about the things that were important to you. You think I have never understood you, and you were right. I never have understood you. I've never tried. There was a part of me that really did cut you off when you didn't want my life anymore. I can't imagine how hard that must have been for you. I made a lot of mistakes Lorelai," I pause, searching her face to try and decipher what she was feeling. Her eyes filled up with tears and as they fell, I reached up with one hand and wiped them away and then let that hand rest on her cheek. With the other hand I covered her hands.

"Lorelai...I made a lot of mistakes and one of them was not to tell you how much I love you. I haven't always acted like it, I know but I love you and I am proud of the person you have become."

She inhales as the tears overflow, "Oh Mommy" she breathes.

"I want to change. I want to do better," I say. "I want to be the kind of mom you want " I am crying now too. "I'll try Lorelai, I'll really try."

It takes us a few minutes to steady ourselves, wipe away our tears.

"Mom?" she says, still trying to get her emotions under control.

"Yes?"

"I told you a lie,"

"What? When?" I ask.

"On the night that Rory went to her dance."

"What? What dance? The Chilton dance–the one she went to with Dean?"

"Yes–I told you a lie that night," she stops and I wait for her to continue. "Mom, I do remember you making me the mashed bananas on toast. I remember you coming into my room and bringing them to me and always pretending to like them, because it seemed that it was important to you that I liked them and I just wanted you to be happy. I remember so much about my early childhood Mom, I remember how you and I used to be. I've tried to forget. I've tried to forget the good times, because it just hurt so bad to know that we weren't like that anymore. I worshiped you Mom. But it felt like when I didn't want your life you turned away from me–that you didn't want me anymore. It feels like you never forgave me for growing up."

"You're right," I said, the pain of my admission searing through me. "I didn't forgive you for growing up. Maybe that's what drove you to make the choices you did, I don't know. I guess I wanted and prayed for you for so long and then once you got here I didn't know what I was doing. Your childhood was wonderful. It was the best time of my life. You were the one person in my life I didn't have to put on a show for. You loved me for who I was." I look up at her and my eyes filled with tears again, "You can't imagine how much it hurt to loose that."

Her face crumpled, and she held out her arms for me–I moved towards her end enveloped her in my embrace.

"I love you Mom," she whispered.

"I love you too Baby," I said, "I love you too," I rocked her back and forth in my arms for a few minutes–both of us crying. Suddenly we heard an unlocking sound, the door flung open and an uncontrollably sobbing Sookie came in.

"That was so beautiful," she cried, putting one arm around me and one arm around Lorelai. "That was absolutely beautiful! Oh my goodness, I can't stop crying, that was so beautiful!"

"Sookie...were you listening the whole time?" Lorelai asked. Sookie nodded,

"Yes and it was beautiful!" she wailed, letting out a fresh batch of tears. Lorelai looked at me and smiled. I winked at her. We walked out and found Luke was waiting in the kitchen as well. Lorelai went to him and kissed him. I held back for a moment, then I walked to them both.

"Rory's coming to dinner tonight. We'd love to have the both of you as well," I said. Lorelai looked to Luke and he nodded.

"We'll be there," she said.

I smiled, "Wonderful." I placed a hand on her shoulder, and then started to walk away.

"Mom?" she called after me.

"Yes?" I answered.

"This will take time, and work–but today was a good start."

"Yes–it was," I replied smiling. "Yes it was."

I walk outside and I am so delighted I can hardly stand it. I take out my cell phone and dial my home phone number.

"Gilmore residence" Maritza answers.

"Maritiza, this is Mrs. Gilmore. I want you to set the table for dinner–for five,"

Suddenly I realized that I had no ride–the DAR ladies had left. As soon as I had come to this realization–there was a honk. I turned around to see Richard in the parking lot. I walked over to the car and got in. He looked over at me smiling,

"Everything okay?" he asks. I smile, and for the first time in a long time–I felt a weight lifted. Yes, it would take time and work, but Lorelai and I would be fine–just fine.

"Yes..." I reply–for the first time, in a long time, "everything's okay."