Disclaimer: Nope, not mine!
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Chapter 42 – Weeping Willow
To learn that my father was dead would've grieved me to no end, but to learn that I was to watch as time slowly destroyed him was devastating. This was a man that I had always looked up to despite being nearly as tall as him and now he was looking to me to protect my mother.
I could barely handle the news myself.
Thankfully Sirius was there to hold up both my body and my soul, a soul that had been tattered from years of wear and trauma but still he loved it, still cherished it as he cradled it in his artist's hands like it was glass.
Every moment I had I used to remind my father and mother I loved them, and I have found it to be something I do everyday now to anyone I love.
Never take anything that is giving to you freely for granted. Death can be a strange way of making people closer. But when truly looked at Death is a force similar to Mother Nature only her message becomes clearer in the face of a loved one who is passing.
She reminds us that things like violence, greed and prejudice are trivial things and that loving one another, being close to one another rather then wasting your life pushing those you love away is vital.
Death, in all her lonely glory, is a poet. And Death always has her arms open for everyone no matter their colour, religion or beliefs.
-That- is what my father taught me.
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(1976)
Sirius sighed as he looked towards the Transfiguration class door again, tapping his quill nervously as he fidgeted before looking back at Professor McGonagoll once more.
Sirius had left the Lupins in the hospital that morning deciding that all time should be shared between them without another in the way. Both Lupin seniors and Remus had protested but he was adamant on not stealing their time from one another. He would look after his Remus and offer whatever he could to the Lupins but he strongly believed that at least for now they needed one another more then they knew.
As he continued staring ahead he closed his eyes in brief pain. Remus just collapsing in front of him affected him more then he would ever have let on. He sometimes could still feel the salty tears soaking his shirt, faint echoes of the werewolf's consuming grief drifting into his ears everytime he closed his eyes and the small body heaving as it finally released more then just pain for a father dying but also over a decade's worth of pain filtering through as well.
He could feel his eyes become misty and itchy so shaking his head he opened them again, staring ahead and trying to ignore the ache in his chest.
James however could see the eyes, so close to the shade of the sky when a sun blares brightly, dim from an emotional turmoil and he ducked his own head when he saw the bottoms of those eyes swim slightly in unshed tears.
Lily felt like she'd never smile again as she looked on at one of her newest friend's grief. Sirius was but a reflection of what Remus must be feeling and if she felt like her very spirit was crumbling at the sight of Sirius Black then she didn't want to test her strength by gazing at Remus Lupin who still had yet to return from the hospital.
Peter wasn't sure how to feel. He almost felt guilty at the idea of still having his parents and then he'd berate himself knowing that Remus wouldn't want him thinking like that.
Sirius's vision was becoming too hazy and so in means of distraction he turned to look out the window. He wondered why when something bad happened that you'd suddenly see the world in a new light. Like now, even as he felt his heart go out to his mate he found comfort in the scenery outside...and how it almost always linked itself to your life at the time.
Summer was dying, Autumn now rising in her morbid beauty.
Ethan Lupin was dying and in his wake Remus was to take charge, his tattered heart still beating in all its ethereal enchantment.
His eyes followed the sway of the trees, gently being caressed by the wind making a leaf fall here and there prematurely as the green limb danced on the breeze before finally coming to rest upon the earth where it moved no more.
All sound dropped away and Sirius felt as though he was outside, flying above the treetops and over the sparkling lake as it rippled, his reflection shaky and distorted as he soared above it...
...Soared above it and closing his eyes, blocking the window form view, he sent a thought flying over the waters and to his lover who was in great need of guidance right now.
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Remus Lupin sat beside his father on the hospital cot while his mother lay on the opposite side of his father. Both Brigit and Ethan were asleep, Brigit resting her head against her husband's chest as the man lay back gathering as much rest as he needed. Remus stayed up and continued to carefully stroke his father's hair.
Never had he felt so weak to do anything. He had led naked after transformations unable to move from pain but this struck his body even more harshly then anything else that had happened to him. With his transformations he could blindly drag himself to a blanket and cover himself, shield himself but here...
...Here he had no sanctuary. Regardless of whether the Death Eaters lost this time in the long run they had destroyed this family who had done nothing wrong save be born the way they were.
Voldemort's war made no sense, it was a racist campaign that served to do nothing but destroy everything in its path like a reckless forest fire. A group of Pure-blooded Wizards and Witches who arrogantly believed they were surprior because their blood held magick from both sides of their heritage.
Remus closed his eyes closed as he breathed slowly to calm himself before he went again. His hands were trembling, whether in anger or grief he couldn't tell.
Opening them again, his eyes more moist as he felt that terrible weight in his stomach return, he jumped when he came face to face with his father's kind wakeful gaze.
Ethan reached up and cupped his son's cheek, rubbing a thumb under Remus's cheek to wipe away the beginning traces of stinging tears. Then he pulled the boy down and upon his brow he placed a fatherly kiss, the tawny boy's eyes fluttering closed making more water build up.
"My sweet cub...My little Roman Prince." Ethan muttered as Remus's shoulders began to shake in silent tears as the man voiced every nickname that he had every giving his son.
Remus's lips parted slightly as he made soundless sob, eyes clenched shut as he leant his forehead against his father's shoulder, Ethan's hand cupping the back of the boy's head as he let his tears fall also.
"Daddy." Remus said curling up to his father, head buried against the man's chest as he felt the man's breathing hitch, trying so hard to hide his sadness from his son.
"It's going to be ok, It's going to be ok." Ethan whispered as his voice broke, rocking the boy as gently as he could so not to wake his wife.
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Sirius had the roll of parchment spread out in front of him as he sat on the dormitory floor but he was staring at it without seeing it really. His hand was poised over it with his quill resting against the fingers but it remained where it was creating a large black ink pattern to leak throughout the sheet.
His mind was moving so fast, each thought trailing after the other as quickly as it had come. What could he do? How could he help Remus now? What was he –supposed- to do? How do you tell someone you know their pain when you hate your own family?
His hand had begun to tremble a little making the feather quiver as though in fear until he felt a hand rest over his. Numbly he looked up until he was staring into sad peridot green eyes that were circled by life giving red hair.
Lily and Sirius stared silently at one another, James sat on his bed as he watched the exchange silently. Then he saw it...
...He saw the first chip in Sirius's defensive wall as a lip trembled and eyes began to swim in pained, confused and useless feeling tears.
"I didn't know what to do," Sirius said in a voice layered with grief, "I couldn't stop the pain and he just kept on crying and I didn't know what to do."
The quill fell out of his fingers limply as he lowered his head, his body seemingly curling into itself as he placed his hands flat on the floor. He looked like he was bowing in prayer.
Lily felt something run down her cheek but after a brief exchange of looks with James they both knelt before him and offered him comfort.
"He was crying so hard and I couldn't make it go away, I couldn't make it better this time."
James's own vision became misty as he watched his best friend finally snap under the pressure of not being able to help his lover.
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"Never treat Death like it's the murderer Remus," Ethan said to his son softly as he held the boy to him as he stroked the hair lovingly, "Death is the spirit that realises the person from their pains."
Remus nodded as he reached up with his hand to wipe away his tear tracks. Brigit Lupin had gone to find them something to eat in order to leave father and son alone to talk.
"What do you believe happens to you when you die Dad?" Remus asked quietly and Ethan was pensively quiet for a second before he spoke again.
"I believe that whatever a person feels will happen, will happen. If you believe in Heaven then that is where you go, if you believe in reincarnation then that too will happen. Some believe in the Summerlands which for Muggle Druids and Wiccans is a place of rest... I like to think I will go a brilliant field where the sun always shines..."
Remus looked up and saw the gently smile on his father's face.
"...The field will be on a cliff side and if I look over the side then I'll see magnificent shores where the sea rises and falls...And in the middle of this field there will be a brilliant Willow tree..."
Ethan looked down at his son and Remus could see the tears in them once more.
"...But the leaves won't be green, they'll be a sort of golden brown...like yours and your mothers hair."
Remus could feel his face scrunch up slightly in an effort not to break down again.
"And I'll sit under the tree to think...all the time. My father once told me that like ancient Celtic families that each wizarding family has a hall they go to where all their ancestors wait to greet them...but I like to think that us Lupins have that brilliant field with that single weeping willow."
Remus stared silently at his father and he saw him like how he saw him when he was a small child when his father would sit beside him to tuck him into bed before he weaved some beautifully intricate tale. And he found it just as calming now as he had done then.
"That doesn't sound so bad." He whispered and his father gave him a watery smile.
"...Will you be waiting there for me, by that Willow tree?" Remus asked quietly and Ethan smiled again.
"Yes but I'll have to look into your eyes to recognise you...because you will be old and happy before you entered those fields."
Remus felt a small smile come to him for the first time in days.
"It won't hurt there. And after we've rested we can all be reborn, you me and your mother and we'll be a family again."
The young werewolf swallowed as he hugged his father tightly, Ethan Lupin hugging back just as tightly.
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"Death has a body like a model, the clothes of a poet and the smile of your best friend. She wears a Top hat for fun. Her ankh for power, and carries a big black umbrella for travelling to the 'sunless lands'. I wonder what she smells like? I'm sure it's fresh and clean and her laugh must be tinkly or maybe it's warm and chuckily, but whatever it is, Death laughs a –lot-.
...What I appreciate is...is that Death never tells the people she is with what to do. She accepts everyone and understands why they are the way they are. She likes people (even if they are sad or old or young or nasty) so that they really begin to trust and like themselves too, and, liking themselves, instead of –ending- they can start –beginning-."
Claire Danes; 1997
This chapter is dedicated to my cat Figaro. Some may not understand my lingering grief as to you it sounds like he was just a pet but to me he was my closest friend and not a day goes past that I miss his purr against my heart. If ever any one has lost a Best Friend then you come close to how I feel about Figaro Mowatt, My Pet and my constant friend but most of all my guardian.
(TBC)
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AN: ...Sorry this is up a little late, ever since I've been starting this section of the story I've been thinking about Figaro and...Ok, don't laugh but I started crying again and my dad, mum and sister all just hugged me. My sister told me this beautiful story that every one has a piece of heaven made up of memories and people they lost find them again. So she started telling me that one day I'll sit there and Figaro will come up to me purring and he'll sleep by my side again. Ever noticed crying makes you sleepy? And give you headaches.
Thanks to:
Saturndragon: hug them tightly.
Yaoi-is-gay-13: Good, glad you liked it.
Legolas19: Thanks.
Lilastar: A lot of parents must be wearing shocked faces right now lol!
Kynny: I know about your weird feeling I just keep breaking every now and again. Hence the wonderful heaven story my sister told me. This is a particularly hard part of the story for me but I've always planned it.
Avain: The emotions weren't hard really, maybe that's why I'm getting so upset lately. I never cry but now I understand how hard it was on JK to kill Sirius so I'm going to forgive her. It hurts because you bring up your own memories and then it just hurts. Strangely though the last chapter was my favourite also...it felt more –real-.
Sidhelady: Definitely.
Sexy Pancake: It certainly hit close to home for me.
Blue Winged Angel: Lol, a strangely perky review that brings a smile to my rather mucky looking face now.
Marble: Tell me about it.
MelRickman: I will wrote happier chapters and I plan to make a happy moment for the Lupins. And it's a pleasure writing for such people as yourself, and after the fiasco of my emotions being screwed up after writing this section of the story be assured that 'Embracing' will end on a happy note.
Rhiannan Star: Wow what a compliment. Thank you so much, I think I needed to hear that.
Hp-Azn: I hope you know I'm suffering for you! I'm opening up old wounds to make this right for you. But I will forgive you because...well I love you lot all too much, I couldn't have asked for better reviewers and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
White-Winged Sidhe: Eh we'll cry together!
Suzuka West: Tell me about it, this sucks getting depressed!
Taykayo: Believe me, if I knew how I'd create forums to go with this story to just let you guys chat. And I love the sound of your mum, she sounds wicked cool and well safe! Lmao at what your sister said, that really brought a smile to my face. Since I'm such a cat person I feel kind of honoured you once owned a cat called Callie. And thank you, I'm glad you like my name lol.
Passionflower: lol Believe me when no satisfaction is being made out of this, I simply want to put a real thing in here somewhere. But I liked your comment about the moon, we just had a Blue Moon here so that was a nice sight.
Adhara1: LMAO at the imagery, I can always count on you to cheer me up! I think people liked that chapter a lot and yet not many (Not even myself) can explain why.
Guu-Sama: I never intended to have Ethan recover, it was just deciding whether he should live then or not. And lol, I love to hear about your dog, whether you've gathered or not yet I love animals. Oreo sounds lovely and I have an image of him in mind lol.
Happy Cabbage: I'm sorry for your loss, truly. I hope I'm not doing any damage am I?
Cybes: I suppose but that's the thing, this is a magickally inflicted curse...it was never meant to be fixed and like you said medicine back then isn't nearly as effective as today.
Elrohir Lover: (curls up against Elrohir for a hug) I'm just going to stay here for a while.
Happo: Evil yes but don't think evilness comes without a price.
Caity-Cat: Lol I can see you owning the T-shirt with the message 'Slowly one by one the Penguins steal my sanity'.
Pippinsmyhobbit: Maybe I should start offering out hugs...it could be a two way thing because I've been receiving hugs all night. Lol at the cinema thing though, my friend's took me to see 'King Arthur' today which was amazing.
Venilia: Yeah that's kind of what I wanted to do. You never know what you're losing until you lose it. Unfortunately I didn't know Natasha as much as some people but it does still hit you hard. And ah, I've been crying so much lately it would be daft to place judgement on one person.
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Chapter 42 – Weeping Willow
To learn that my father was dead would've grieved me to no end, but to learn that I was to watch as time slowly destroyed him was devastating. This was a man that I had always looked up to despite being nearly as tall as him and now he was looking to me to protect my mother.
I could barely handle the news myself.
Thankfully Sirius was there to hold up both my body and my soul, a soul that had been tattered from years of wear and trauma but still he loved it, still cherished it as he cradled it in his artist's hands like it was glass.
Every moment I had I used to remind my father and mother I loved them, and I have found it to be something I do everyday now to anyone I love.
Never take anything that is giving to you freely for granted. Death can be a strange way of making people closer. But when truly looked at Death is a force similar to Mother Nature only her message becomes clearer in the face of a loved one who is passing.
She reminds us that things like violence, greed and prejudice are trivial things and that loving one another, being close to one another rather then wasting your life pushing those you love away is vital.
Death, in all her lonely glory, is a poet. And Death always has her arms open for everyone no matter their colour, religion or beliefs.
-That- is what my father taught me.
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(1976)
Sirius sighed as he looked towards the Transfiguration class door again, tapping his quill nervously as he fidgeted before looking back at Professor McGonagoll once more.
Sirius had left the Lupins in the hospital that morning deciding that all time should be shared between them without another in the way. Both Lupin seniors and Remus had protested but he was adamant on not stealing their time from one another. He would look after his Remus and offer whatever he could to the Lupins but he strongly believed that at least for now they needed one another more then they knew.
As he continued staring ahead he closed his eyes in brief pain. Remus just collapsing in front of him affected him more then he would ever have let on. He sometimes could still feel the salty tears soaking his shirt, faint echoes of the werewolf's consuming grief drifting into his ears everytime he closed his eyes and the small body heaving as it finally released more then just pain for a father dying but also over a decade's worth of pain filtering through as well.
He could feel his eyes become misty and itchy so shaking his head he opened them again, staring ahead and trying to ignore the ache in his chest.
James however could see the eyes, so close to the shade of the sky when a sun blares brightly, dim from an emotional turmoil and he ducked his own head when he saw the bottoms of those eyes swim slightly in unshed tears.
Lily felt like she'd never smile again as she looked on at one of her newest friend's grief. Sirius was but a reflection of what Remus must be feeling and if she felt like her very spirit was crumbling at the sight of Sirius Black then she didn't want to test her strength by gazing at Remus Lupin who still had yet to return from the hospital.
Peter wasn't sure how to feel. He almost felt guilty at the idea of still having his parents and then he'd berate himself knowing that Remus wouldn't want him thinking like that.
Sirius's vision was becoming too hazy and so in means of distraction he turned to look out the window. He wondered why when something bad happened that you'd suddenly see the world in a new light. Like now, even as he felt his heart go out to his mate he found comfort in the scenery outside...and how it almost always linked itself to your life at the time.
Summer was dying, Autumn now rising in her morbid beauty.
Ethan Lupin was dying and in his wake Remus was to take charge, his tattered heart still beating in all its ethereal enchantment.
His eyes followed the sway of the trees, gently being caressed by the wind making a leaf fall here and there prematurely as the green limb danced on the breeze before finally coming to rest upon the earth where it moved no more.
All sound dropped away and Sirius felt as though he was outside, flying above the treetops and over the sparkling lake as it rippled, his reflection shaky and distorted as he soared above it...
...Soared above it and closing his eyes, blocking the window form view, he sent a thought flying over the waters and to his lover who was in great need of guidance right now.
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Remus Lupin sat beside his father on the hospital cot while his mother lay on the opposite side of his father. Both Brigit and Ethan were asleep, Brigit resting her head against her husband's chest as the man lay back gathering as much rest as he needed. Remus stayed up and continued to carefully stroke his father's hair.
Never had he felt so weak to do anything. He had led naked after transformations unable to move from pain but this struck his body even more harshly then anything else that had happened to him. With his transformations he could blindly drag himself to a blanket and cover himself, shield himself but here...
...Here he had no sanctuary. Regardless of whether the Death Eaters lost this time in the long run they had destroyed this family who had done nothing wrong save be born the way they were.
Voldemort's war made no sense, it was a racist campaign that served to do nothing but destroy everything in its path like a reckless forest fire. A group of Pure-blooded Wizards and Witches who arrogantly believed they were surprior because their blood held magick from both sides of their heritage.
Remus closed his eyes closed as he breathed slowly to calm himself before he went again. His hands were trembling, whether in anger or grief he couldn't tell.
Opening them again, his eyes more moist as he felt that terrible weight in his stomach return, he jumped when he came face to face with his father's kind wakeful gaze.
Ethan reached up and cupped his son's cheek, rubbing a thumb under Remus's cheek to wipe away the beginning traces of stinging tears. Then he pulled the boy down and upon his brow he placed a fatherly kiss, the tawny boy's eyes fluttering closed making more water build up.
"My sweet cub...My little Roman Prince." Ethan muttered as Remus's shoulders began to shake in silent tears as the man voiced every nickname that he had every giving his son.
Remus's lips parted slightly as he made soundless sob, eyes clenched shut as he leant his forehead against his father's shoulder, Ethan's hand cupping the back of the boy's head as he let his tears fall also.
"Daddy." Remus said curling up to his father, head buried against the man's chest as he felt the man's breathing hitch, trying so hard to hide his sadness from his son.
"It's going to be ok, It's going to be ok." Ethan whispered as his voice broke, rocking the boy as gently as he could so not to wake his wife.
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Sirius had the roll of parchment spread out in front of him as he sat on the dormitory floor but he was staring at it without seeing it really. His hand was poised over it with his quill resting against the fingers but it remained where it was creating a large black ink pattern to leak throughout the sheet.
His mind was moving so fast, each thought trailing after the other as quickly as it had come. What could he do? How could he help Remus now? What was he –supposed- to do? How do you tell someone you know their pain when you hate your own family?
His hand had begun to tremble a little making the feather quiver as though in fear until he felt a hand rest over his. Numbly he looked up until he was staring into sad peridot green eyes that were circled by life giving red hair.
Lily and Sirius stared silently at one another, James sat on his bed as he watched the exchange silently. Then he saw it...
...He saw the first chip in Sirius's defensive wall as a lip trembled and eyes began to swim in pained, confused and useless feeling tears.
"I didn't know what to do," Sirius said in a voice layered with grief, "I couldn't stop the pain and he just kept on crying and I didn't know what to do."
The quill fell out of his fingers limply as he lowered his head, his body seemingly curling into itself as he placed his hands flat on the floor. He looked like he was bowing in prayer.
Lily felt something run down her cheek but after a brief exchange of looks with James they both knelt before him and offered him comfort.
"He was crying so hard and I couldn't make it go away, I couldn't make it better this time."
James's own vision became misty as he watched his best friend finally snap under the pressure of not being able to help his lover.
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"Never treat Death like it's the murderer Remus," Ethan said to his son softly as he held the boy to him as he stroked the hair lovingly, "Death is the spirit that realises the person from their pains."
Remus nodded as he reached up with his hand to wipe away his tear tracks. Brigit Lupin had gone to find them something to eat in order to leave father and son alone to talk.
"What do you believe happens to you when you die Dad?" Remus asked quietly and Ethan was pensively quiet for a second before he spoke again.
"I believe that whatever a person feels will happen, will happen. If you believe in Heaven then that is where you go, if you believe in reincarnation then that too will happen. Some believe in the Summerlands which for Muggle Druids and Wiccans is a place of rest... I like to think I will go a brilliant field where the sun always shines..."
Remus looked up and saw the gently smile on his father's face.
"...The field will be on a cliff side and if I look over the side then I'll see magnificent shores where the sea rises and falls...And in the middle of this field there will be a brilliant Willow tree..."
Ethan looked down at his son and Remus could see the tears in them once more.
"...But the leaves won't be green, they'll be a sort of golden brown...like yours and your mothers hair."
Remus could feel his face scrunch up slightly in an effort not to break down again.
"And I'll sit under the tree to think...all the time. My father once told me that like ancient Celtic families that each wizarding family has a hall they go to where all their ancestors wait to greet them...but I like to think that us Lupins have that brilliant field with that single weeping willow."
Remus stared silently at his father and he saw him like how he saw him when he was a small child when his father would sit beside him to tuck him into bed before he weaved some beautifully intricate tale. And he found it just as calming now as he had done then.
"That doesn't sound so bad." He whispered and his father gave him a watery smile.
"...Will you be waiting there for me, by that Willow tree?" Remus asked quietly and Ethan smiled again.
"Yes but I'll have to look into your eyes to recognise you...because you will be old and happy before you entered those fields."
Remus felt a small smile come to him for the first time in days.
"It won't hurt there. And after we've rested we can all be reborn, you me and your mother and we'll be a family again."
The young werewolf swallowed as he hugged his father tightly, Ethan Lupin hugging back just as tightly.
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"Death has a body like a model, the clothes of a poet and the smile of your best friend. She wears a Top hat for fun. Her ankh for power, and carries a big black umbrella for travelling to the 'sunless lands'. I wonder what she smells like? I'm sure it's fresh and clean and her laugh must be tinkly or maybe it's warm and chuckily, but whatever it is, Death laughs a –lot-.
...What I appreciate is...is that Death never tells the people she is with what to do. She accepts everyone and understands why they are the way they are. She likes people (even if they are sad or old or young or nasty) so that they really begin to trust and like themselves too, and, liking themselves, instead of –ending- they can start –beginning-."
Claire Danes; 1997
This chapter is dedicated to my cat Figaro. Some may not understand my lingering grief as to you it sounds like he was just a pet but to me he was my closest friend and not a day goes past that I miss his purr against my heart. If ever any one has lost a Best Friend then you come close to how I feel about Figaro Mowatt, My Pet and my constant friend but most of all my guardian.
(TBC)
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AN: ...Sorry this is up a little late, ever since I've been starting this section of the story I've been thinking about Figaro and...Ok, don't laugh but I started crying again and my dad, mum and sister all just hugged me. My sister told me this beautiful story that every one has a piece of heaven made up of memories and people they lost find them again. So she started telling me that one day I'll sit there and Figaro will come up to me purring and he'll sleep by my side again. Ever noticed crying makes you sleepy? And give you headaches.
Thanks to:
Saturndragon: hug them tightly.
Yaoi-is-gay-13: Good, glad you liked it.
Legolas19: Thanks.
Lilastar: A lot of parents must be wearing shocked faces right now lol!
Kynny: I know about your weird feeling I just keep breaking every now and again. Hence the wonderful heaven story my sister told me. This is a particularly hard part of the story for me but I've always planned it.
Avain: The emotions weren't hard really, maybe that's why I'm getting so upset lately. I never cry but now I understand how hard it was on JK to kill Sirius so I'm going to forgive her. It hurts because you bring up your own memories and then it just hurts. Strangely though the last chapter was my favourite also...it felt more –real-.
Sidhelady: Definitely.
Sexy Pancake: It certainly hit close to home for me.
Blue Winged Angel: Lol, a strangely perky review that brings a smile to my rather mucky looking face now.
Marble: Tell me about it.
MelRickman: I will wrote happier chapters and I plan to make a happy moment for the Lupins. And it's a pleasure writing for such people as yourself, and after the fiasco of my emotions being screwed up after writing this section of the story be assured that 'Embracing' will end on a happy note.
Rhiannan Star: Wow what a compliment. Thank you so much, I think I needed to hear that.
Hp-Azn: I hope you know I'm suffering for you! I'm opening up old wounds to make this right for you. But I will forgive you because...well I love you lot all too much, I couldn't have asked for better reviewers and I mean that from the bottom of my heart.
White-Winged Sidhe: Eh we'll cry together!
Suzuka West: Tell me about it, this sucks getting depressed!
Taykayo: Believe me, if I knew how I'd create forums to go with this story to just let you guys chat. And I love the sound of your mum, she sounds wicked cool and well safe! Lmao at what your sister said, that really brought a smile to my face. Since I'm such a cat person I feel kind of honoured you once owned a cat called Callie. And thank you, I'm glad you like my name lol.
Passionflower: lol Believe me when no satisfaction is being made out of this, I simply want to put a real thing in here somewhere. But I liked your comment about the moon, we just had a Blue Moon here so that was a nice sight.
Adhara1: LMAO at the imagery, I can always count on you to cheer me up! I think people liked that chapter a lot and yet not many (Not even myself) can explain why.
Guu-Sama: I never intended to have Ethan recover, it was just deciding whether he should live then or not. And lol, I love to hear about your dog, whether you've gathered or not yet I love animals. Oreo sounds lovely and I have an image of him in mind lol.
Happy Cabbage: I'm sorry for your loss, truly. I hope I'm not doing any damage am I?
Cybes: I suppose but that's the thing, this is a magickally inflicted curse...it was never meant to be fixed and like you said medicine back then isn't nearly as effective as today.
Elrohir Lover: (curls up against Elrohir for a hug) I'm just going to stay here for a while.
Happo: Evil yes but don't think evilness comes without a price.
Caity-Cat: Lol I can see you owning the T-shirt with the message 'Slowly one by one the Penguins steal my sanity'.
Pippinsmyhobbit: Maybe I should start offering out hugs...it could be a two way thing because I've been receiving hugs all night. Lol at the cinema thing though, my friend's took me to see 'King Arthur' today which was amazing.
Venilia: Yeah that's kind of what I wanted to do. You never know what you're losing until you lose it. Unfortunately I didn't know Natasha as much as some people but it does still hit you hard. And ah, I've been crying so much lately it would be daft to place judgement on one person.