IFD: Volunteer Division

By Nolitari

A/N: Thank sooo much to my reviewers. I will be afraid, Lindele, cause I know where you live also. HA! I can even get satillite maps of your house. Cheif Glorfindel's hair will remain incontact...for the time being. AH! IT WILL STAY INTACT! I PROMISE! (I didn't say I would keep Haldir's, Elrond's, Orophin's or Rumil's! 'Stor has met my wrath a little bit too much, I will lay off of him for a while.) I bet you that your sister will kill me that I made Cheif Glorfindel afraid of 12 pound domestic felines...
This chapter will be EXTREMELY short. I am leaving tomorrow for a while...so I can try to get a new chappie of There and Never Going Back Again before I leave.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. (sniffle) Sad, isn't it? Wait...I own the IFD! HA! In your face, Tolkien!

On with the Cats! Eh, show...um, FIC!

o-o-o-o-o

"GLORFINDEL!" Haldir shouted from the gardens. "THERE ARE A FEW CATS UP A TREE!"

Glorfindel paled. "Not cats!" He hurried out of the room, leaving the mess behind for the maids to clean up. The poor door never got fixed. Even to this day, it swings on one hinge.

Haldir sighed a sigh of relief when Cheif Glorfindel came slowly running to the gardens. He was trying to comfort a frantic Lindir. All seven of his kittens were stuck up a tree and wouldn't come down.

"Oh my cats! My cats! Get them down, Glorfindel!" Lindir said, trying to be calm.

Glorfindel paled even more. He hated cats. He was afraid of cats. Cats were evil. And, the cats just had to be up the tallest tree in the gardens.

"Please Glorfindel! Get them out of the tree! What if they hurt themselves?" Lindir begged. 'Just go play your harp...your precious kitties will be fine...because HALDIR is going to get them.'

"Haldir, as tree climbing training..." Haldir cleared his throat. "Excuse me, Cheif Glorfindel, I know how to climb trees because I lived in a tree."

"Well, you know-it-all, go up the tree and get the cats!" Glorfindel snapped. He glanced up the tree at the frantically meowing kittens.

"Right at this moment I am slightly incapitated." Haldir stated.

"You LAZY marchwarden! Just because you chipped a fingernail and one of your braids got burned DOESN'T mean that you can't climb a tree!" Glorfindel was jumping up and down, trying to prove his point. Haldir looked at him as if he was insane. Lindir started to hyperventilate.

"Plus," the fire cheif added, "I am your cheif, so you have to listen to me."

Haldir grumbled. The stupid Gondolin Balrog Slayer had a point there. But it was his braids...his poor, innocent hair didn't deserve a fiery fate. The IFD fund didn't have enough money to supply all the firefighters with flame retardent hair nets, so, Glorfindel was the one that got it. Plus, Haldir only worked in the Volunteer Division. "Oh fine." He latched on a branch and swung himself up.

'HAHA! You can do the dirty work, Haldir!' Glorfindel inwardly laughed.

Haldir - with the amazing elven climbing abilities - was up the tree in no time. Quickly he gathered the kittens in his cloak, except for one. One kitten that was walking toward the edge of the branch.

"MISS PUSS!" Lindir shouted. 'Miss Puss' had jumped off the branch, and was falling for Glorfindel's face.

"Oh NOT AGAIN!" Glorfindel loudly groaned.

Miss Puss landed with full impact on Glorfindel's face, and for a 7 pound cat, knocking the Balrog Slayer to the ground.

"Glorfindel? Chief Glorfindel? Are you awake? How many fingers am I holding up?" Lindir asked as he scooped Miss Puss into his arms.

Haldir came climbing down the tree with the cats in his cloak. "Chief Glorfindel?"

"He won't reply."

"Do you think the cat killed him?"

"Miss Puss? NEVER!"

"WAKE UP!"

"AHH! KILLER THE CAT IS BACK!" Glorfindel screeched because one of the kittens started playing with his braids.

"Do you think he is mad?"

"Maybe..."

"LORD ELROND!"

A/N: Another EVIL CLIFFIE! Tune in next week and find out what happens to Glorfindel after his strange moment of deja vu. (dumb kitten) Will he go mad? Or will he pull through and save the day again?