Disclaimer: FFX is not mine. Hell, even Square ain't mine. There is something else later in the fic that's not mine. I won't mention what it is right now. That'd be cheating.

FDB- I know that this fic is supposed to be a Romance/Angst and I have neither so far, but it will get better. I promise that the chapters will get more depressing.

Chapter 3: Suppressed by all my childish fears.

This is pretty cool. I'm one of Yuna's guardians. Although, Auron doesn't seem all that hot on the idea. But you know what? Screw him. I think Yuna was right. It doesn't matter. That kid sent me here for a reason. I might not know what it is, but I'll figure it out. I have to.

We were almost off of the Highroad, when we heard yelling. "How many times do I have to tell you? I'm a summoner!" As we approached this big gate thing, we saw this big guy that could probably out-wrestle Kimahri, and this woman…uh…. Remember when I mentioned that these people liked to show flesh? This lady was no exception. The only thing between her thong and the world was some crossed strips of leather.

"Sorry, ma'am. No exceptions," the guard said, probably for the umpteenth time.

"You dare impede a summoner's pilgrimage?"

"Sorry, ma'am. No exceptions." Knew it.

"Useless!" Miss Show-Off yelled. She walked over towards us, obviously pissed. "Oh, it's you. As you can see not even summoners can pass. But they'll call on us in the end. Just wait and see." Then she did something I had hoped she wouldn't. She saw me. "I don't remember seeing this one back in Kilika. New guardian? What's your name?"

"Jamie."

"Ah, interesting name. Dona. Hope you can protect your summoner with a broken stick. But it looks like your pilgrimage ends here. In the meantime, I think I'll have a nap. Oh, Barthello?" This bitch is really pissing me off. But I suppose she's right. If this guard isn't even letting summoners past, we aren't going anywhere.

A cart pulled up to the gate while I was contemplating how the hell I was getting home if our little venture stopped here. The two guys with the cart saluted the guard and introduced themselves as Gatta and Luzzu. More…unique names. The cart had something in it, and it looked as though it didn't want to be in there. Ever been to a museum and seen those prehistoric fossils? It looked like something from there, like a giant millipede.

Gatta was talking to Tidus about 'blitz', whatever the hell that is, when Luzzu remarked, "Wait around. We'll have Sin beaten in no time!" These two jokers are gonna beat Sin? I've never seen Sin before, but if it's anything like what I've heard, and if it draws so much attention, those two jerk-offs don't have a chance in hell.

We tried to go through with them, but the stupid guard wouldn't let us pass. Figures. We…well, Tidus asked what was going on in there; he said something about sinspawn, and luring Sin into a trap.

I relaxed a little bit, knowing we weren't the only ones trying to take Sin down. "Well, if it works, it works," I said.

"It won't," Auron muttered. I don't think anyone else heard him.

Let's have a big round of applause for the first 'what the hell' of the day! This guy with a weird, blue tattoo mark on his face walked up. Yes, weird. I started thinking that nothing in this world was 'weird', just unique. But this was just grade-A fucked up. The second thing that drew my attention were his hands when he did this wei…unique bowing thing. They were huge!

"Who's this joker?" I muttered to Wakka.

"That's Maester Seymour, one of the leaders of Yevon. Show some respect, ya?"

Seymour. Hearing that name, I couldn't help but envision a huge flower yelling 'Feed me, Seymour!' Thinking of all this forced me to stifle a laugh. Lulu gave me a weird look, but dismissed it as nothing. Hopefully.

"So we meet again, Lady Yuna," Seymour said in a tone that sent shivers up my spine.

"Y-yes." Apparently Yuna didn't really like this guy, either.

"You look troubled. Is there anything I can do?"

"Well…."

"You could use your 'divine authority' to get us through…," I muttered under my breath. This elicited an elbow in the ribs from Wakka.

Even creepier, I think the guy heard me. "I see." The guard walked up to him offering to take him to 'the command center'. Seymour asked the guard to let us through, and even though the guard was against it, he finally gave in.

"It is done. Though I suggest you hurry. It is getting rather late. You may not make it to the command center today." He was right, I hate to admit. It was late.

"Thank you. Your grace," Yuna said. I'm not entirely sure she meant it, though.

We continued on down the road, and when we reached a small crossroads, we met up with Seymour again. He gave some kind of pep speech to some people called Crusaders. Wakka was bitching about Al Bhed machine. Not all that surprising. Like I said earlier, if it works, it works. I think Wakka would complain even if they were using an electric toothbrush against Sin. Tattoo-face said something to Auron that seriously got under his skin. I just tuned everyone out, and was glad when Seymour walked off.

We entered this strange valley and decided to camp for the night. Once we got a fire started, they all gathered around as Tidus started telling stories of Zanarkand, where he came from. I eased away to be on my own. I guess I'm still the lone wolf I always was. No amount of acceptance will ever change that.

I couldn't help but think of what Dona said earlier that day. 'Hope you can protect you summoner with a broken stick'. She's right. Just about everyone I meet ends up being right. I need some kind of weapon. I need something that I can actually use to help. I remember the last time I tried to help someone. It ended miserably. I…

"Hey! What are you doing over there? Come join us," Tidus offered.

I turned back to them, seeing that all of them, even Kimahri, were turned around, looking at me. I decided to appease them and dragged myself over to their little circle. Even as a part of their group, I felt like I didn't belong. I suppose that's because I didn't. I shouldn't even be here. But I am.

"Why do you go off on your own all the time?" Lulu asked. "It's almost as though you don't want to be with us."

"You got me," I muttered as I raised my hands over my head. "You got me." I sighed as I came to realize something. They had to ask sometime. But am I ready to explain? Shaking my head, I looked around at my new 'friends'. Are they really going to accept me?

"It's pretty complicated. I don't really know where to start." I looked over at Yuna, and just the look on her face seemed to encourage me. "I guess an explanation of what's going on is a good way to start. I…I have had a few girlfriends in my life. If you're as famous as you say, Tidus, then you know the feeling. But every time, something happens. I always end up broken hearted. Every time. It's gotten to where I'm used to being alone. I'm comfortable alone. I'm so used to it, I feel strange when I'm with other people. I don't know how to react to kindness. That's why I try to distance myself from others."

"You can trust us, ya? You ain't the only outsider we've taken in," Wakka said, getting Tidus in a headlock. "Just look at this hooligan."

"I know you mean well, but…I've just gotten so used to it. I'm sorry. I shouldn't even be here. Auron's right. I can't do anything to help you."

Standing up, I trudged a ways away from them before dropping to the ground and falling into a deep slumber.

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That night I had the weirdest dream. That kid showed up again. By now you can only imagine how pissed I am at this little prick. But now, I wasn't all that mad. I had a feeling what he wanted.

"You here to send me home?"

"Nope. You're not done with the job I gave you. You'll be able to return when you're done."

Was this kid serious? "Listen. I haven't been able to do anything since I got here. At least not anything that could help them. The only thing I have for a weapon is one of Kimahri's spears I stupidly broke the blade off of."

"Then let's get you a better weapon." Huh? What is he talking about? "My friends and I can create a weapon from your memories. Any memory."

Any memory? My first thought was to choose a gun from Doom or Jak 3. But I decided against it. These guys, Yuna and everyone, had weapons like swords or sticks. What kind of weapon could I have stored in my memories that's kickass, powerful, yet portable. One sword immediately came to mind. If I were to choose anything, I'd have to choose….

"Alright. Done."

"Huh? I haven't even chosen yet."

"You'll get your sword in the morning." The little prick disappeared again, and I got that same feeling of being thrown.

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The rest of my night had been dreamless. I woke with the sun the next morning, something I would never have done back home. But this isn't New York. Looking back over to where everyone else had slept, I noticed Lulu huddled next to the fire. She looked like she was cooking breakfast, but that wasn't the first thing that registered.

"Why you so close to the fire, Lu?" I asked, noting her cleavage. "Get cold last night?"

She was pissed. Simple as that. Whether she was PMSing, or just not a morning person, I don't know. What I do know is that I'll never make her mad as long as I live. She grabbed one of her dolls (I figured out earlier it was something called a moogle), and waving her arm at me, conjured a bolt of lightning. I. Am. A. Moron.

The shock sent me over the cliff I was sleeping next to. Luckily it wasn't a long drop. It still hurt like hell at the bottom, though. I'm pretty sure my yell woke everyone else up, because I heard Yuna ask if I was alright.

"Other than a few years shaved off my life? Fine." I stood, still groggy from Lulu's venting, and looked around. Funny thing was, I remember looking down here last night, and there wasn't a sword stuck in the ground. Walking up to it, I grasped the sheath and pulled it out of the ground. Tidus and the others had found some rocks to climb down and walked up to me.

Wakka was the first to speak. "Where'd you find that?"

"It was just down here." I was just as confused as everyone else.

"At least now you have a decent weapon," Auron muttered in his usual apathetic tone.

I felt like testing my new blade right then and there, but I restrained myself. I did, however, unsheathe it. And, after getting a good look at the blade, almost didn't want it. The blade was a piece of crap! It looked like it had been chewed up by a junkyard rottweiler, and the left to rust!

"Heh," Auron chuckled. "Guess I spoke too soon."

"Shut up! Or I'll sharpen it on your hide, old man!"

"I doubt that piece of crap could even penetrate my jacket."

As you can tell, I'm seriously pissed at Auron right now. But I yet again managed to restrain myself. Sheathing my POS, I moved over to the rock ledges and climbed up. After some conversationless walking and climbing, we came to this elevator looking thing.

Those two guys, Gazza and Luttu…or is it Guzzu and Latte? Whatever. They were arguing about the battle to come. The operation that was supposed to defeat Sin. Send both of them in. The more the merrier. Or something like that…. The little guy…Gazette?...finally gave up.

"Gatta deserves better…" Tidus said. Gatta! That's it!

"At least there's no chance he'll get hurt," Wakka replied. Turning to Ladder, he said, "Why are you guys fighting, anyway? Aren't the almighty Al Bhed Machina enough?"

"They still need some time to get them ready. Our job is to keep Sin at bay 'til they're done."

Loser said something to Wakka about convincing his brother to enlist, and Wakka knocked the shit out of him. Go Wakka! Tidus started to hold him back, and he couldn't get in another hit. BOOOOOO!

After Wakka had calmed down, I decided to tune him out. He was talking about his brother, and I just assumed he was dead. Auron walked up to me and pulled me to the side. Apparently, he wanted to talk.

"We may have to do some fighting in this upcoming battle. Many people have lost their wits when they see Sin. Are you sure you're up to it?"

Truth be told, I wasn't sure. I didn't even know what we were up against. All I know was that if it has caused such an uproar over the years, then it is a force to be reckoned with. "A guardian's job is to protect their summoner, right? I'll protect Yuna."

"Don't give me that. At the first sign of danger, you'll run like a scared dog, with your tail between your legs." Is he deliberately trying to piss me off? He turned from me and walked back over to the others. Turning his head back my way, he muttered, "If you do decide to fight, I suggest you don't do any with that rusted toothpick. Borrow a sword from the kid if you have to." By 'the kid', I suppose he meant Tidus.

A woman rode up to us riding another one of those chocobos. I hate chocobos. "All Crusaders in the vanguard are to assemble on the beach!" she yelled.

"That's my cue," Luigi sighed. He was walking off, when Wakka shouted, "Luzzu!" I'm just getting everyone's name wrong today. "Don't die out there."

"So you can hit me more?"

"Lots! Lots more!" Go Wakka.

Yuna tried to get in Luzzu's way, but Auron talked some sense into her.

We continued on up to the command center, but before we got there, we saw a row of cannons on the edge of the cliff. Wakka kicked one of them, but ended up hurting himself. Lulu told us that Wakka's brother, Chappu, left the sword Wakka gave him back home and fought with an Al Bhed weapon. I think she meant the Fishhook.

"That's got nothing to do with it! I just hate these sacrilegious contraptions! It won't work, anyway."

Yuna stepped forward, a rare moment, and said, "Don't say that. It might be a hopeless campaign, and it might mean defying Yevon… But the Crusaders and the Al Bhed…they're doing their best to defeat Sin. They want to rid Spira of Sin forever. And that's just what we want, too."

"Alright," Wakka grumbled in a defeated tone. "But I still think machine are bad news. They're forbidden for a reason!" I was about to ask what reason that might be, but the chocobo lady walked up again. She showed us the way to the command center, and mentioned something about another master guy being here. Yuna sounded like she didn't like the idea.

We saw Gatta at the gate and he told us to check our equipment. I already had mine checked. Rusty sword, check. Stick, check. Balls, check. Clean underwear…worry about that later. I got a good look at the guy, and it looked like he was depressed.

"You alright?" I asked.

"Of course not! I came here to fight Sin! But they stick me here!"

"I know how you feel…," I muttered under my breath.

"If you want to prove yourself, first you must complete the tasks you are given," Auron told the young soldier. Thank you for that useless tid-bit, Confucius.

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A/N- If you've played the game, you know that right here is a point that will decide the fate of either Luzzu or Gatta. In my file, I made it to where Gatta lives, so Tidus tells Gatta that guarding the command center is important. Now, back to your regularly scheduled fanfic.

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While Tidus was over talking to Gatta, I noticed Auron talking to this fat, bald guy that looked like my dad. Me and Tidus were looking at him funny and Lulu took it upon herself to explain.

"That's Wen Kinoc, one of the four maesters of Yevon. He leads the warrior monks and also commands the Crusaders."

Yada yada yada. I could care less. The Gatta guy showed up and told Kinoc about the troops. Kinoc dismissed him, and went back to talking to Auron. Then…Seymour showed up again. Ugh….

More conversation between Auron and Kinoc. I'm beginning to think those two know each other. Wonder why?

A little while afterwards, we were waiting for the operation to start. I think everyone was on edge. Tidus was walking around for some damn reason, talking to everyone. I knew he would eventually come around to me.

He did. "Think we have a chance?" he asked me.

Sighing, I figured I had better tell him the truth. "I honestly don't know. I won't be much of a help. I need better weapons than a stick and a piece of shit sword. I wonder if I'll be able to protect Yuna if the time comes…."

I dropped to the ground when he walked off. I had never seen Sin, but already knew that it would be the Godzilla of this world. Except without the crappy animation and frantic Japanese people. Unless you count the American version from a few years back. That rocked. I'm getting of track, aren't I?

After awhile, I was beginning to go nuts. Yuna took the words right out of my mouth when she sighed to me, "I kinda…think we don't belong here." Yeah, really. I kinda think I don't belong here.

"It is time at last," a guard announced. "We must tell the Al Bhed waiting outside to begin the operation at once. The fiends may break through. This place is not safe. Make sure you're prepared to defend yourselves. Tell me when you're ready."

Right there I wanted to run. Run as far away as I could, find that kid, kick his ass, and get home. But I didn't. I don't know why, whether it was because I'd be abandoning Yuna, or if I was proving Auron right. Yeah, it's the second one. I just don't like that old decrepit bastard.

"Are you ready?" the guard asked Tidus after a while. And he of course said yes. As ready as we'll ever be, I guess.

Yuna still looked worried. "Will Sin come?"

"Sin always returns for its spawn," the guard informed us…well, maybe just me…and Tidus. "To make sure, we're going to encourage them to call it out." I turned to the huge cage we saw coming in. They shoved what looked like cattle-prods into it and tazered the shit out of the thing in there.

"You won't have to," Auron grumbled. "It'll come." He drives me insane sometimes.

I didn't have much more time to mentally bash the old fart, because the sinspawn thing in the cage broke out. This thing was definitely uglier than the chocobo eater thing back at the highroad…and Kimahri combined. It looked pissed and took out all the guards around it. Then, you guessed it, it came for us.

Everyone, except me, lined up to face the mofo. We weren't exactly prepared to face it as we were. Me especially. Maybe…I hate to say this…but maybe I should have followed Auron's advice. 'Borrow a sword from the kid.' Wait. 'The kid'? Did he mean Tidus…or did he mean…the kid that brought me here! That dream! 'My friends and I can create a weapon from your memories'. Memories….

Then it hit me. That dream…the memory…the sword I thought of…this piece of crap I had now. It was like a ton of bricks. I suddenly realized what I had to do. Before the others could assault the sinspawn, I stepped in front of Yuna.

"What are you doing?" Wakka shouted. "You don't have a decent weapon!"

"Not yet. I think I realize what's going on." I glanced over at Auron and saw him nod. I think he gets it, too. Turning back to the sinspawn, I continued. "I have to protect Yuna at all costs."

Then, I drew my sword.

FDB- Hate to end this chapter here. It's a literary technique called a cliffhanger. Leaves the audience hungry for more. Review please. The next chapter should be up shortly.